Gender Complementarity in Bedouin Society
This is an exploration of the idea of gender complementarity in Bedouin society and its relation to public and private life, as depicted by Abu Lughod in Veiled Sentiments.1 Firstly, an argument is presented about why such a topic should not be disregarded as anti progressive, despite how it might not fit with the gender equality doctrine. Also a brief consideration of how it already takes place in western culture. In order to understand the subject in Bedouin society a claim is made of what the existence of gender complementarity implies and is follow by an argument of why it is essential to understand it in terms of the Bedouin’s values. Then a brief description of the value system as it relates to men and women before addressing kinship, marriage and the ghinnāwa and how they express the presences of a complementary relationship between genders.
In this western society where we are focused on achieving gender equality, the idea of gender complementarity could easily be construed as a backwards way of thinking. Dividing a group up by its biological markers such as gender or race before delegating roles to individuals based on their group identity has been a common story of history. This phenomenon has too often been the justification for the suppression of one group by another, for their own gain. But the idea of gender complementarity is essentially the opposite of oppressor/suppressed dynamic typically used to describe male/female relations throughout history. So while gender complementarity is at odds with gender equality, to dismiss it as backwards would be a disservice to men and women alike. Given that irrefutable differences exist between biological sexes, such as reproductive organs, a case could be made that Gender equality is a utopian vision which would ultimately confine both genders to be each other, rather than free to be themselves. Regardless, males and females are reproductively depended and need one another. One option is to exist in a complementary relationship, where each gender is able to specialise in a strength, while being supported by the other where it is weak. In the west this exist most commonly between individuals in the form of marriage, where two individuals unite together despite their differences and aim for what’s good for both of them, not just for themselves.
In Bedouin society however, this complementary relationship isn’t only between married individuals but permeates the whole culture. To understand how such as thing as gender complementary can exist on a societal level, it is important to recognise that it is reliant upon a unified recognition of a transcendent ideal. This is to say men and women must subordinate themselves to something that transcends their own group’s needs and wants, and unites them with the other. So when addressing the idea of gender complementarily in Bedouin society it must be in terms of their own ideals, not ours. “Blood” is a central idea to Bedouin people as they consider themselves decedents of the first followers of the prophet Muhammad.2 They identify so strongly with their blood that it’s believed that their morality and character is drawn from their male descendants.3 Abu-Lughod described this supposed inherited morality as being centrally defined by honour and modesty.
“Individuals must achieve social status by living up to the cultural ideals entailed by the code of honor, in which the supreme value is autonomy.”4
Autonomy is central to the code of honour and it is a key determinant to where one falls on the social hierarchy.4 The code of modesty is an alternative for those who are weak and dependent, unable to realise their autonomy.4
“Awlad ʿAli mediate the contradiction between the ideals of equality and the realities of hierarchy by considering relations of inequality not antagonistic but complementary. They invest independence with responsibility and a set of obligations and dependency with the dignity of choice.”5
Here Abu Lughod eloquently portrays the essences of the complementary relationship between genders for Awlad ‘Ali. Men, the “strong”,6 are valued and respected by society to the degree that they use their own autonomy, to choose conformity to the honour code. This entails a responsibility to protect and care for their dependants; “inherent in the division between weak and strong is a unity of affection and mutual concern”.6 For Women, the “weak”,6 which are always dependent to some degree, validate the honour of their provider through voluntary submission.7 This voluntary choice to act with modesty is a demonstration of autonomy and consequently is respected.8 This also implies that involuntary subordination to the strong reflects negatively on both parties. Here in the cultural distinction of men and women of independent and dependent respectively, causes a separation in the domain of which each group primarily operates.
The code of Honour is best represented in the public sphere and is done so by men.5 Women who thought to be morally inferior are more restricted in their movements and operate primarily in the private sphere.9 Abu Lughod recalls version of the fall from grace told by a man of the group.
“God created Eve from Adam’s bent lower rib. That is why women are always twisted. They never talk straight.”9
This clearly illustrates a relatively uncontested opinion that men are more capable of bringing the code of honour to life in Bedouin society. Thus men subordinate themselves to the transcended ideal of the honour code, while women subordinate themselves to honour code in the form of man by practicing the modesty code. Both benefit by being able to live in a more honourable society. But dividing the roles of men and women so contrastingly means a system must be in place to maintain that divide and also to stop it from becoming divergent. The Strong’s identification with their kin strengthens the ties between sexes, just as unification can occur under an ideal, it can also occur over shared descendants. The value the Bedouin attribute to blood and their orientation towards honour is portrayed clearly in preference of the marriage between a man and his father’s brother’s daughter.
“The advantages of such marriages are that they presumably build on the prior bonds of paternal kinship to take on the closeness, trust, identification, and loyalty appropriate to such bonds.”10
Kinship also strengthens bonds between men, which simultaneously creates distance from women. The emphasis on patrilineage, men’s moral superiority to women and consequent responsibility to maintain honour in the family, reinforces the distance between genders.9,11 Similar can be said for women who share the social expectations of modesty.12 But there is a sacrifice entailed in conforming to the codes of honour and modesty. The ghinnāwa is a beautiful example of a medium that straddles the dichotomy of separateness for unification, by recognising the hardship of being part of something that transcends your own desire.
The ghinnāwa or little songs, are forms of spoken poetry that express sentiments of weakness, that if spoken in the standard medium of communication would be considered a failure to uphold the honour or modesty code. Abu Lughod portrays this clearly with a poem composed by a man that expresses his feeling of heartbreak, when recalling a woman he had love but married another man.
“Thinking of them with pain if only they would not come to mind . . .”13 tafākīrhun bawjāʿ lū kān mā ʿalēnā yukhuṭrū
Poems such as this convey deep personal feelings but provide no imbedded context to attach what is spoken to the speaker, allowing them to share their own hardship in a creative, artistic and thoughtful manner without diminishing there moral worth.14 The ghinnāwa are not spoken between men and women except as lovers, but both share poems with their own close groups.15 This creates a stronger connection between men and women at the level of individual lovers, but creates distance at the group level due to the private and confidential manner in which they are shared. This is best understood by Abu Lughod's comparison of these sentiments to secrets. “Secrets function to exclude those who do not share them and to closely bind those who do. Thus, categories of equals gain cohesion and divisions between nonequals are intensified, reinforcing the structures of Bedouin society.”16
So while the ghinnāwa seems contradictory to the codes of honour and modesty, there is also an element of a complementary relationship.
The idea of gender complementarity in Bedouin society is fundamentally about the division of values; Honour and Modesty. This translates in the public and private spheres where men portray honour publicly, through strength and independence where as women portray modest privately, though self-control and wilful submission to whom they depend on. This is a dichotomy because it implies honour is the highest ideal, but that honour with modesty is more honourable. Similarly, independence is a crucial part of honour, but independence without any dependants is not as honourable as independence with wilful dependents. Marriage also is a dichotomy because men and women are separated as groups but unite as individuals. The ghinnāwa also serves to distance and reinforce social boundaries while strengthening the links between them. Everywhere one looks in Bedouin society contradictions arise that have a complementary relationship. To explain the public and private divide with the idea of gender complementarity would miss the point, because they are both a product of same cause.
In conclusion it must be noted that the focus here has all been on complementary aspects of gender in Bedouin society, with no attention given to the more antagonistic elements, which most certainly exist. This has been done in the hope of inspiring a more inquisitive eye, when cast upon a culture that is so contrasting and to open the doors to realising what the West might be missing. In Veiled Sentiments, Abu Lughod beautifully reveals a deeply embedded dichotomy at the heart of the Bedouin culture. Such a discovery leaves us to question if the practice of things such as gender complementarity, is the result of an archaic ideology or an honest cultural expression of human nature?
L. Abu-Lughod, Veiled sentiments, University of California Press, 1986, Kindle ed., p.1, accessed 5/09/2019.
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