What to Expect When You’re (Not) Expecting: Chapter Fifteen
an A Court of Thorns and Roses Modern AU
All characters belong to SJ Maas!
IT’S FINALLY HERE!! Y’all…. College is crazy. I promise I’m gonna try harder to bust out the last several chapters as best I can.
My other completed fic: Breath Control
ENJOYYY and let me know if you’d like to be tagged!
TW: references to sex, losing virginity, deceased family members
The next weekend I started getting orders for prints in droves. Mor forced me to make an Instagram to start advertising and I’d already gotten about 500 followers. It wasn’t a huge number, but it was something. I wasn’t sure how to keep up with posting and production but Mor promised she’d help me figure it out. I was lucky to have made such a good friend who also happened to know about running a small business. Not that my art shop was much of a business yet.
Even though it was only November, I’d also started selling some of my old clothes online to get some Christmas cash. I wanted to get the kids Christmas presents using only the money from my art shop and clothes money. So far, I’d made several hundred dollars and knowing that I wouldn’t have to dip into my savings or teaching money this holiday season felt great.
I’d also been spending more and more time with Rhys and his siblings. Rachel’s car had to go into the shop for about a week and as a result Rhys had been picking her up from my place on nights when she babysat the kids. Rhys and I remained strictly friends. However, against my better judgment I always invited him in for a few minutes when he came to get Rachel and he’d end up staying longer than normal. Rachel, Rhys and I would sit in the living room talking as the kids whirled around us. Rory started asking for Rhys to come over on a regular basis, she loved him so much. Aspen never hid behind me when he came by, and Basil adored him. It was easy to have a conversation with Rhys even though the kids interrupted us every five seconds. He just understood that chatty kids were part of my life, and his.
“Well maybe if you weren’t so busy with her,” Rachel said suddenly during a discussion of how busy we all were, “You’d have more time to relax.”
I stiffened. She could only be referring to one person.
Rhys’ eyes flicked to me and then returned to his sister’s face. “Well, maybe if you weren’t so busy with your boyfriend, Rachel, you’d also have more time to relax.”
“At least my boyfriend isn’t a jerk,” she mumbled, picking at a loose string on the pillow next to her.
I clapped my hands. “Alright! I hate to kick you guys out, but I’ve got to get these kids in bed so I can get some work done. Thanks for everything, Rachel.”
Rachel shot me a meaningful look, although I wasn’t exactly sure what her meaning was supposed to be. I just shrugged and she rolled her eyes.
Rhys’s kid sister wasn’t on to me, was she? Shit.
She stood, grabbing her backpack before brushing past Rhys and into the hallway. “See you next week, Feyre!”
Rhys stood. “Sorry about that. She’s… not really a fan of my girlfriend.”
I bit my lip to prevent myself from saying something too snarky, although the words, “No one’s a fan of your girlfriend” settled on the tip of my tongue. I managed to grind out, “Sisters. Sometimes they think they know what you need more than you do.”
I meant it as a joke but Rhys frowned, his eyebrows creasing. He stood there for a moment, staring at me with his mouth just slightly opened. He abruptly shut it and headed for the door. “Have a good night, Feyre.” He shut the door.
“You too, Rhys,” I said to the closed door.
Around a week after Rhys and Rachel’s awkward conversation about Amy, I was enjoying a rare Saturday evening alone. In a rare [3] show of goodwill, Nesta had volunteered to watch the kids for the whole night. Of course I had accepted such an offer, and I now lay on my couch binging The Vampire Diaries and making more pieces for my art shop while I stuffed my face with Goldfish. I checked the clock. 8:30. Normally it would be bedtime and I would be running around like a madwoman trying to get the kids to bed. But thanks to Auntie Nesta, I had the house to myself until tomorrow morning.
I was just clicking the “Skip Intro” button on my fifth episode when my cell phone rang. I paused the TV and checked the caller ID.
I bit my lip. Since when did Rhys and I talk on Saturday nights? Shouldn’t he be out with his lovely girlfriend?
I answered the call. “Hello?” I asked timidly, wondering what on earth this could be about.
“Feyre. I’m so sorry to call like this.”
I sat up straight at his tone, setting my iPad on the couch next to me. “What is it?”
I heard a loud breath of air through the receiver. “Rachel has hit ultimate meltdown mode. I don’t know what’s going on with her. She got home an hour ago, burst through the kitchen sobbing, ran up the stairs and locked her door. She won’t talk to me. She mentioned something about David, then something about our mom before shutting everyone out.”
Rhys sighed again. “Can you come over? I think I’m out of my depth on this one. I’m worried David did something but I can’t get her to tell me anything.”
“I’ll explain more when you get here. Thanks, Feyre.”
The call disconnected. For a moment I sat there, staring at the paused television screen.
I made it to Rhys’ house in about twenty minutes. I didn’t waste any time getting out of my car and rushing to the front door. The door opened as soon as I knocked.
“None. Loud music, she won’t answer me or Ollie. I’m pretty sure I heard crying and possibly the sounds of things breaking? I don’t know.”
I bit my lip. “Okay. Stay here. I’m going to try and talk to her.”
As I climbed the stairs, I started questioning everything I was doing. I’d rushed over at Rhys’s bidding without a second thought. Now I was going to help his little sister (who, granted, I had grown close with over the past few months) deal with something. What if she didn’t want me there? What if she rejected my presence and I’d have to tell Rhys I couldn’t help.
It was easy for me to find her room because of how loudly her music was playing. I knocked.
“Go away.” I barely made out the sound of Rachel’s voice over the music.
“Rachel. It’s Feyre. Please let me in.”
The music quieted, just barely.
I tried again. “I made your brother stay downstairs. Can we talk for a second?”
The door swung open. Rachel’s dark curls hung messily around her face, and she wore a huge sweatshirt and sweatpants. Her eyes were red, her cheeks tearstained.
She fell into my arms and I shuffled into her bedroom, closing the door behind us. We stood there for a moment, her grip tight around my shoulders as she hugged me, tears soaking into the shoulder of my shirt. Finally, she pulled away and slumped onto her bed, grabbing a pillow and putting it over her face.
“What happened?” I asked, sitting down on the edge of her bed.
“I think I just broke up with David.”
I was grateful she had her eyes covered up because my mouth popped open of its own accord. David and Rachel were inseparable. They’d been together for years, and Rachel told me they’d already talked about doing long distance when they went off to college. Granted, they were teenagers. But Rachel never complained about David. They had a very emotionally mature relationship from what I could tell. More emotionally mature than a lot of teen relationships I witnessed at the high school, anyways.
“Oh, no. Rachel I’m so sorry. What happened?”
I heard something unintelligible come from behind the pillow.
“Rach, I can’t really understand you with the pillow over your mouth.”
She threw it on the floor and covered her face with her hands. “I just made the biggest mistake of my life.”
I had a bad feeling I knew where this was going.
“My mom didn’t sleep with anyone except for my dad. She waited until marriage.”
“I always wanted to do that. To be like her. But–”
“But you didn’t wait,” I finished for her.
“No.” Her voice came out all twisted, and fresh tears spilled from her eyes when she spoke. “I’ve been with David for two years and we were both on board to wait! But I don’t know, lately I’ve just been thinking… And I thought I was ready, I really did. But now I’m wondering what if I wasn’t? Where do I go from here? I didn’t stick to my plan!”
I scooted closer to her and put an arm around her shoulders. She continued crying into my shoulder.
“Rachel. I,uh, I have to ask. Were you guys safe?”
“How long had you been thinking about it?”
“Well,” I said gently, “You can’t go back and undo what you guys did. And I certainly don’t see it as a reason to break up with David. From what I hear from you and what I see at school, that boy really loves you. He didn’t pressure you, did he?”
“No! David would never. We talked and talked and talked about it and finally I said we should just do it. So we did. And he was a perfect gentleman, and things were so great and afterward I freaked out and ran away. I told him I wasn’t sure if I could be with him anymore.”
I stood up and pulled Rachel to her feet. I led her over to her bathroom and forced her to sit at her vanity. The Nights really did live in style. I grabbed a washcloth, wetted it, and gave it to her to wipe her face. She did so while I started talking.
“When I was eighteen, I lost my virginity to a boy from my school named Isaac Hale. We weren’t even in love. For some reason, I wanted to get it over with before college. He was nice, but we didn’t really have any sort of relationship. I did it, and I always kind of regretted it afterward. But you, Rachel… You got to share that with somebody you love, and you were safe about it. You don’t need to feel ashamed, or worried, or disappointed that you didn’t wait until marriage like your mom. And if you feel up to it, I think you should talk to David about it. He’s probably sitting somewhere in agony over losing someone as great as you.”
Rachel let out a harsh little laugh and then took a deep breath. Her tears had stopped, the mascara on her cheeks rubbed away. “You’re right. I know you’re right. I just… freaked out.”
“A natural reaction to have, I assure you.”
“Thanks for coming to help me, Feyre.”
We walked back out to her bedroom. “I can’t believe I just told my English teacher I had sex with my boyfriend,” Rachel snorted.
I shrugged. “Our relationship goes a little bit beyond just teaching. You take care of my kids. It’s okay.”
Rachel hesitated at the door. “I don’t think I can tell Rhys. I just want to go to bed. Will you tell him I’m okay?”
“I promise I’ll talk to him tomorrow. I just… Need to call David. And sort myself out a little bit more.”
I nodded. “Okay. But if he asks, I won’t lie.”
“That’s okay.” She threw herself at me for another hug. “Thank you.”
“Anytime,” I said, returning the gesture. Something inside me warmed with the knowledge that I had been able to help Rachel.
As soon as I stepped off the bottom stair, Rhys was there.[8] I sucked in a breath at his nearness, trying not to think about how close he was to me, staring down at me intently.
“What happened? Is she alright? You were up there for a while.”
I laid a hand on his arm. “She’s fine. Calm down. She’s going to bed, but she said she’d talk to you in the morning.”
He looked down at my arm and I snatched it away. I’d barely realized I’d done it. “You can’t tell me anything?”
I glanced up the stairs. “It’s Rachel’s story. But I want you to know she was safe,” I widened my eyes at him, “And she’s just dealing with the fallout within herself, now. David didn’t do anything wrong.”
Rhys suddenly looked very uncomfortable. “Oh, god. Oh god oh god oh god. I am not equipped for this sort of thing.”
I nudged him in the side. “That’s why you have me.”
He turned his head to look at me. His eyes were wide as saucers. “I’m really damn lucky to have you, then.”
In sync, both of our gazes dropped to the ground at his words. I cursed myself for blushing. Rachel’s music cut off abruptly and we were left standing there in silence. The quiet seemed to expand around us. I bit my lip, but Rhys didn’t look away. Squeezed into the hallway at the bottom of the staircase, he stood only a hands-breadth away from me. If I were to lean forward, even a little bit… Was it just me, or was Rhys leaning closer too? Six inches away, five, four–
No. I took a sharp step backward, my back hitting the wall behind me. “Please call me if things get worse. And tell Rachel to call me if she needs anything at all.”
Rhys swallowed, glancing around at anything other than my face. He stuck his hands in his pockets and nodded. “I will. I can’t thank you enough for this, Feyre. I don’t know how to be her mom, sometimes, if you know what I mean.”
I nodded. “I know exactly what you mean.”
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