Sports are emotional, so I am.

-Donny

[delicateballer]

The 0NE

After KD’s burner DMs got leaked and his “alleged” funding of drones for the IDF, I had a thought. One of my Twitter headers I made in middle school was of my four favorite athletes at the time. Those four were Antiono Brown, Le’Veon Bell, Kevin Durant and Russel Westbrook. I had posters and fatheads of these dudes, I always had to play as them on madden and 2k. But as the years passed, three of these men would turn out to be terrible people.

From Antiono Brown who’s currently charged for 2nd degree murder, but also has a list of other legal problems, including domestic disputes and sexual assault/misconduct. Then Le’Veon Bell who ordered to pay his cousin 25 million dollars in a civil suit due to the sexual abuse he caused. Then Kevin, truthfully I hated KD before but it was due to the fact he left OKC, but in recent years my opinion on him has changed. I have come to appreciate him as a player again. With the leaks he has cemented a reputation as a snake who never wants to take accountability, and also just a ghoulish man for joking about the genocide in Gaza.

Finally there's Russell Westbrook, a man who’s been often critiqued and bashed by the media and online fans for a decade. Russell's impact isn’t felt on the court much, it's greater than any triple double. His impact is in the community that raised him in LA and OKC, still doing events for OKC through his “Why Not?” foundation, and investing in an affordable housing project in LA. Being one of the more polarizing figures in recent basketball history hasn’t been easy, even recently his wife received death threats by an angry sports bettor. But no legal disputes, not a bad word from most former teammates, someone who keeps helping the ones who helped it, and a true role model. Thank you Brodie for being my role model :)

-Donny the Delicate Baller

[delicateballer]

Break the Cycle

Over the weekend we saw another athlete fall to the pressures and expectations of life. When I got the notifications about Rondale More, I had the same feeling in my stomach when I got the news about Marshawn Kneeland and Kyren Lacy. 3 different young men, 3 different stories of but all the same unfortunate outcome. I have problems with the lack of mental health care in the NFL and male sports spaces, but this is not just a sports problem. It’s an epidemic, men of all ages are suffering for years in silence until they can’t do it anymore. Being taught that men are strong, they don’t cry, they’re supposed to be the emotional pillars for the ones around them, but pillars can only hold that weight if they're stable.

The thing that always gets me in these moments after a tragedy like this happens, it's the same talks. About how men's mental health matters, and it does greatly and to the athletes and other prominent men who champion mental health, I love with all my heart. But the same man who’ll tell you men's mental health matters after an athlete ends his life, is the same man who’ll load up twitter to joke about athletes crying after a loss, will make fun of any man they deem as “fruity” or “sus”, and joke about other men's trauma. Then when the next one happens he’ll repeat the cycle. We need to break the cycle. Not just for our athletes, but for us as men, as people.

The signs are there if you look close enough, little changes that don’t mean much in the moment, but you’d wish you mentioned it when you had the chance. I know every man isn’t ready to open up and be vulnerable, but let them know you’re there for them. Let them know they’re not alone. Let them know if they fall, you’ll be there to catch them. Don’t just say it, do it. Life is hard but it makes it easier when you can be vulnerable and open with the men you trust the most. Luckily for me, I’ve found some of those men and I hope to surround myself with more as I continue to grow. Please let's break the cycle, not just for us, but for the next generations of young men. Rest in Peace to these 3, I wish we could've seen you grow old with us.

-Donny the Delicate Baller

[delicateballer]

They Maye Be Back

Last weekend I was reminded of a feeling that I haven’t felt since high school, the dread of watching the Patriots march towards another Super Bowl. Memories of past hopeful January’s, just to see the Patriots dog walk in the AFC. Super Bowl Sundays of the past, the sudden disappointment of Malcom Butler’s goal line interception, the disbelief and anger of watching “The Comeback”, and the sheer boredom and annoyance watching them get the 6th Ring against the Rams. I remember all the big loses the Steelers took at the hands of the Pats, close games, huge blowouts, names like Duron Harmon and Chirs Hogan haunt my football soul, along with Danny Amendola, James White, LeGarrette Blount, Julian Edelman, Dont’a Hightower, Jamie Collins Sr, Patrick Chung and both Devin and Jason McCourty and the rest of the foot soldiers Bill had prepared each year. I can vividly recall the Logan Ryan pick-6 that ended Brady’s Patriots era. I jumped out of my body and was so happy for it to be over. Well it does please me to see Bill Belichick legacy being actively tarnished each passing moment and I don’t hate Tom as much as I once did. I forgot how much I hate the Patriots, but I don’t hate these Patriots. I think Drake “Drake Maye” Maye is awesome; I like Boutte, Henderson, and Henry a ton. Diggs has been one of my favorite WRs of the last 10 years and Gonzo has been one of my guys since his year at Oregon. This team has been so fun to watch this season and I’m glad I’ve been able to enjoy it. To think back to that January weekend in 2020, I hoped it would take a decade or even multiple to get back to this point, but they’re sadly back. I just hope this version of the Patriots doesn’t haunt like the ones of my teenage years, and if they do I’ll be ready to hate them all over again.

-Donny the Delicate Baller

[delicateballer]

I’m very excited to see how the Steelers move on from the Tomlin era. I hope to see a lot more moving around on the coaching staff and front office. I’m ready to see what direction we’re heading towards with whoever the Steelers do hire, minus a couple coaches. I knew it was going to happen last night after the loss, but it’s still very sad to see the only coach I’ve known finally leave. All the memories come flooding back: last second wins, world class offenses of the late 2010s and the Steel Curtain rebirthed in the earlier years of his coaching tenure, playoff master classes and disasters, funny sideline moments, and a Super Bowl 43 win. Thoughts of the 2016 Christmas Day game fill my head, jumping up and down with my dad after AB reached over to break the plane, and a similar reaction to last week's game vs the Ravens. The Standard is the Standard, and the standard has been good for a long time. But it's time to change the standard to something different, hopefully for the better. Thank you Coach T for all the memories and being the coach of my childhood. I will always remember you 

-Donny the Delicate Baller

[delicateballer]

Saturday, December 13th, my childhood hero will retire and his career will be over. A career that has been around since before I turned one. Now I'm 24, trying to express my gratitude and adoration for a man who’s touched and inspired so many. I don’t think I’ll truly be able to find all the words to explain my love for John Cena, but I’ll try.

John Cena has been a constant in my life from the moment I can remember anything. The first moment I really remember seeing Cena and my brain can register it was him was Wrestlemania 25, Cena vs Edge vs BIg Show. Watching him lift up both at once was the moment I think I realized I didn’t need superheroes, I had John. Play wrestling, hitting an attitude adjustment onto a couch or on a trampoline, nothing feels better. I’ve even been Cena three different times in my life for Halloween. Merch, action figures, belts, games. When you think of John Cena fans I was one of them.

As the night closed on WrestleMania 28, I watched John Cena sit on the ramp on the stage in the shadow of the Rock celebrating their “Once in a Lifetime” match.  For the past year John claimed he would beat The Rock, and for the first time in a while Super Cena didn’t win the big one. The next night on Monday Night Raw, coming off the biggest loss in his career to this point John Cena showed vulnerability and humility. Things I had never seen any man do to that point in my life. The part of the speech that stood out to me was when John mentioned if he ever walked into a match thinking he’d lose, he'd leave. But even though he took this enormous loss, he would never give up. Seeing my hero, my role model own up, take accountability, showing a vulnerability we don’t normally see from men like that, it still sticks with me.

The night I got to see John Cena live will be one of the best moments of my life. It was the December 30th, Friday night SmackDown. I had just gotten back into WWE around this time and when they announced Cena was going to wrestle at the show I knew I needed to go. I surprised my youngest brother with the news on Christmas. My love for John Cena also got passed to him. It was also both our first SmackDown, his first WWE event ever. We had seats up with the angels, but it was worth every penny. The moment those trumpets hit, the reaction I saw from him was priceless. We rapped every word to his theme song. The match was okay tag team Kevin Owens and John Cena vs Sami Uso and The Tribal Chief at his peak. When John and Kevin hit the double “You Can't See Me” we turned to each other and the smile he had will be burned into my memory forever. 

The morning of November 11th, I cried. I cried as I watched the clip of John Cena beating Dominik Mysterio for the IC Title. I cried because for years it was the one title the legendary John Cena has never had. He had won everything, the royal rumble twice, money in the bank, the US and Tag Team championships, and 17 time World Champion, and he finally got the last one. I cried because I knew it was coming to a close. I knew that would be the last championship I’d see him win. I cried because I knew with his career, I’m ending a chapter in my life.

Thank you Cena for everything, for subconsciously instilling his famous values of “Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect”, for giving me a way to connect and make friendships in my younger life. For giving me countless moments I’ll carry through the rest of my life. Thank you for never giving up, even when you’d lose.  Whatever happens tonight, I’ll enjoy it. Enjoy seeing those jean shorts, enjoy seeing him sprint down the ramp, enjoy the last Attitude Adjustment, and the last You Can’t See Me. Whatever happens, I’ll enjoy it for the last time because I saw him.

-Donny the Delicate Baller

photo credits: WWE

[delicateballer]

Yesterday, I just watched Zach Ertz possibly take his last NFL snap. The sight of watching him in tears, being consoled by team mates, knowing an injury horrible to come back from, stirred something inside me. The hit that injured him, reminded me of the injury that altered Nick Chubb's career, against the Steelers in 2023. I had a flashback to where I was the moment I saw it, the gym after a long day of work. I had the game on the phone and I remember not seeing the play but hearing Buck and Aikman saying they weren’t going to show the injury because of how bad it looked. I saw what happened and I knew what a lot of people knew, it was going to be a miracle if he returned to the athlete he was merely minutes ago. Now Chubb is just another guy in a lackluster Texans running back room, and unfortunately injured again. Watching Zach Ertz coming to terms with it being his last snap, or he’ll never be quite the same athlete he just was. Two very different men, but the same unsatisfied feeling. Chubb being robbed of his prime and being up there in top ball carries of the decade. Ertz had a successful NFL career, super bowl champ with Philly, 3x ProBowler, and top 100 in receiving yards. But with that injury and him being 35 currently, there’s two options. Retire and end an amazing career not knowing your last game was going to be your last game. No last clap from the fans, no last game in the city loved him first, no last ho-rah moment from the team mates. Second option, Coming back and you just can't do it like you used to. Both equally upsetting, but both overwhelming the outcoming for most athletes. Most of your favorite athletes won’t get the story book ending, you'll be lucky if they get a proper retirement tour, but you’ll always have the memories of them, the emotions you felt watching them, what they mean to you in your life and journey. My first memory of Nick Chubb was laughing because he got to 1000 yards his rookie season and then in comically Browns fashion getting tackled for a loss causing him to lose his 1000s yard rookie season. Little did I know I wouldn't be laughing for long when he’d bulldoze through Steelers defenders for the next 4 seasons. I’ll always remember the fear I’d feel for Browns week because of Him, the anger I felt after that playoff game where he ran that screen play in for a Touchdown that would cause the Browns to beat the Steelers. My first memory with Zach Ertz was pulling his card on Madden Mobile 16, he was one of my first cards I remember using a lot, he's always been a TE I’ve loved to pick up in fantasy, and he’s a guy who’ll remind me of my teenage years, when I first started really watching the NFL. 

That was 10 years ago. 10 years of sports fandom flashed before me watching him in tears. We only see a player's peak and prime years once. We only get to witness every career once, every moment once. Every decade players rise and fall, legends are born, and “remember that guy, whatever happened to him”, history is forever happening in every sport. Only the truly great players and moments will get remembered, but even their legacy will wear off over time. Every sports fan has athletes that've shaped them and inspire them to be better. Sports moments they will never forget, and unspeakable anger at a play or a euphoria from a win that they’ll carry for the rest of their life, and these are mine.

-Donny the Delicate Baller  

Photo by: Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images