my depression has always had control

and I don't think it's letting go of the reins any time soon// I'm a 20 year old high school drop out who happens to be pretty fucked-up mentally//whuddup// I have this blog for when my disorders get bad again and that's almost always. I don't encourage suicide or disorders but I'm more than willing to talk if anyone needs to.

[mikeyjamesk]

me: guys… don’t worry, i’ll handle this

me: *ruins everything*

[depression-stays-but-you-dont]

[amargedom]

“Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.”

— Ernest Hemingway (via naturaekos)

[lovesaddemptyy]

“whats more selfish? committing suicide or forcing someone to stay in a world where they are so unhappy?”

— unknown

[depression-took-control]

I'm dumb

Honestly I just don't understand how I'm supposed to get better when I am hardly making an effort to do so. All I do throughout the day is care for my 3 year old nephew and even with the simplicity in that, I still have suicidal thoughts running my mind. I don't know how to make it stop. I don't know what to do. I feel like such a shitty person for how I am. For who I am.

[depressedanxietydeath]

I love hearing the birds sing in the morning. Everyone is still asleep, the streets are empty and the wind slowly finds its way through the trees. Birds wake up and starting to sing their beautiful unique songs. What would they be singing? Singing about the beautiful morning, waiting for the sun to come up and warm their feathers. Where will they fly to today. Will they already know where they are going or do they think about that at the moment they fly. It must be beautiful flying high up in the sky. Looking down at this world. Seeing more from the world than we do here down from the ground. Will you return to your home tonight, or will you find a new place that you will call your home. And start a new day there, singing while everyone is still asleep, the streets are empty and the wind slowly finds it way through the trees. You’re a beauty, go sing and fly through the day.

[depressedanxietydeath]

You, You left me. How could you?! You told me we would get through this all together. You told me you would always be by my side. The hand to hold when things got scary. The shoulder to cry on when everything got too much. The rock to build on. The light in my darkness. The guide when I am lost. But now, now I’m falling, And there is no one here. You left, you are gone. And I keep falling and falling into this endless darkness, filled with pain. But I guess it’s okay, it’s all my fault anyway.

~ Aletta S.

A very personal piece I wrote a while back. It’s not that good but it has a really deep meaning to me. Please don’t steal it

[depressedanxietydeath]

Don’t look at me!!

I’m awful to see.

[block]

[depression-took-control]

So messy that my messes are messed up

[sadlittleladybird]

do you ever see a photo of someone who’s really really pretty & then get sad bc you’ll never look like that

[depression-took-control]

Basically always.

[psychoticghosts]

I’m the friendliest corpse you’ll ever meet

[666mar666]

Very Idiotic 

[inkskinned]

full and entire offense but the fact we have stricter rules about girls showing up to school with spaghetti straps than we do about controlling guns is fucking disgusting and i can’t even process how much i resent this country’s dismal lack of protection for their youth bye

[treygotguap]

Crazy how one person can change ur whole mood

[dead-inside-happpy-outside]

“One year ago I would have died for certain people. One year later, half of them are dead to me.”

— flxorite (via wnq-writers)

[withoutlovelifeisnothing-deacti]

[imaddictedtomyillness]

“I am both worse and better than you thought.”

— Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals (via dark-splendor)