The unfamiliar ghosts haunting my bones
Empty eyes and soulless essence peer through the phone screen
She manages to infest my bloodstream yet again
Flooding my veins with resentment
Waking up in a sweat at 3am wondering how it is I could feel so angry again
The need to know overwhelms me
Karma ebbs and flows through all of our lives
She picks and chooses when to reveal herself
And for different purposes each time
I’ve become numb to the thought of him, yet curious as to how the two of them are existing in this reality
After the chaos that ensued so many years ago,
How can they live with themselves?
Then again - that grudge has dissipated into a small ache in my chest barely awake most days
Only amplified by locations, songs, words or names
Smells, cars, or a language
A slight sting at the core of my chest
Reminding me of the start of it all
My journey to her through multiple heartbreaks
And as special as the happiness is that I have found; as lucky as I feel -
I cannot help but remember
My experience with the grief
The absolute agony they both put me through
All because of true, innocent and pure love
For pointing me in this direction
Reminding me through these dreams that I am here
Waking up to a beautiful woman who sees me through and through
Is worshipped as I worship hers
As I should have been, all along
So I thank them both - for giving me the chance to find her
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