Realization came suddenly; he was choking. Eyes flying open, Miles sucked in a breath – the faintest of sounds escaped his lips, not quite a sob. He sat up, kicking at the covers. They felt like they were going to wrap around his form and completely constrict his movement and breathing if he kept them over him a moment longer. It took him a few seconds to recognize he was in a hospital bed, in a hospital room, just like the day before.
His hand searched frantically for the remote that would call the nurse’s station – call Laura – and found it under his pillow. Practically yanking to his person, his fingers hovered over the buttons. They shook, and no amount of concentration could get them to stop. Staring past them to the controller, he dropped it and pushed his head into his palms.
How many times had he called Laura when he felt lonely, scared, confused? How mad were the nurses for his incessant buzzing, tired of his every whimper for company? He couldn’t do it again.
Lifting his head, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and shoved himself into an upright position. Sudden displacement of equilibrium had him stumbling and reaching for the wall. Shadows played against his fist, dancing along the line of his arm and beyond his periphery.
He didn’t dare glance over his shoulder and instead focused on locating the bathroom. In the split second his gaze crossed the room, he became aware of Tim’s bed not too far from his own, but he didn’t take the time to see if the other man was awake to witness this.
A few unsteady steps hastened into a near run for the bathroom where he crashed against the sink and bent over it. He hadn’t bothered to turn on the light, too afraid to see what shrouded his form in the glare of the florescent. Seeing it play across his vision during the day disturbed him plenty, he didn’t need it to haunt him at night as well.
Glancing at the bathtub just beyond the handicap accessible toilet, Miles pushed away from the sink and crawled inside. He drew the curtain closed and sank into the shallow tub. Head resting against the lip, he pressed a hand over his eyes and tried to breathe. He didn’t hear the quiet sobs that shook him, only felt the wet trails down his face.
Firmly pressed lips tried to muffle the sound, and he hoped no one could hear him. He could pretend the shower curtain would block out the rest of the world, shielding he from it, and it from him. The idea of sleep was impossible, and even as he pulled his arms tight around himself and pushed himself against the floor of the tub, he found no semblance of rest or peace.
He curled in, feeling as lost as a kid in the woods. He didn’t know what to do, only hide himself – covering his head with his arm.
Maybe it would go away if he wished hard enough.
Even though Miles had told her time && time again that he would
be fine--- that she could stay home ---Laura still found herself
returning back to the hospital. All she wanted was to be able to
make sure he really was there. Some sort of confirmation that he
had made it out of that place alive. She just couldn’t shake the
fear that she would wake up to realize it was all a dream, && that
she would have to dress in black for his funeral rather than to
visit him at the hospital.
Laura hadn’t slept much, && it showed in how there were dark
circles under her eyes. Her hands moved to rub the drowsiness
away, only to feel a sudden sense of dread in the pit of her
stomach. Something was wrong. She didn’t know how, but
even at a young age, Laura was able to know if Ruben was in
danger. That seemed to transfer to Miles when she met him, she
was able to feel if something was wrong. && right now, her
mind screamed that nothing was right.
She didn’t hesitate for a second longer. Laura ran down the
hallway, her hand pushing opening the door to Miles && Tim’s
room only to see an empty bed. ❝Miles?? Miles, where are
you---❞ Her heart sunk down to her feet. What if he had gotten
hurt or someone had taken him? So many things raced through
her mind, that when she finally pushed her way into the bathroom
to see him in the bathtub, all she could do was cry.
It was a relief. ❝Oh, thank god, you’re here...❞ The light was on
&& she had just moved to wrap her arms around him tightly. Her
lips pressing into the side of his head to offer some comfort as
she slowly got into the tub with him. ❝...Lousy bathtub, huh? It
doesn’t really compare to the one back home...❞ Laura tried to
offer a smile, her hand wiping at her eyes as she gestured for him
to come in closer.
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