One of the best days as a CG.
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@diaperjosh
One of the best days as a CG.
Little anchors
When the topic for this discussion came up my little boy and I were having a massive heart to heart about rules and punishments and their importance in our dynamic. Somehow this topic came up and I think it’s an interesting one to discuss so here goes.
What is an anchor?
I don’t really know if there’s a specific term for this but as someone with a scientific background, I can’t help but have noticed this trait within our community. A “little anchor”, in my definition of the term, is something that a little will place an unusually high value on being there for them, something where to others might be nonsensical to be valued as much as it is. For most littles, this will be something like a blanket, a set of pyjamas, or more commonly a teddy bear or other plush toy. When I say being there for them I mean that they have an unusually high drive to have that item with them as much of the time as they can reasonably keep it to hand.
What is the anchor of my little boy?
As much as it seems like it would be his teddy bear Chiron, I believe that I have worked out that his is just as likely that his red blanket which features in so many photos on the blog. He takes it everywhere with him and it helps him to sleep. It has all the hallmarks of an anchor. Both Chiron and the blanket seem to be anchors for my little as far as I can tell because they both go almost everywhere.
Is it always at bedtime?
Certainly in my experience bedtime is when it almost always manifests itself, but I’ve seen it at other times as well. Outside of bedtime a little anchor tends to only come to my attention when someone is in littlespace. With @little-alteran this usually holds true. I’ve often seen him feel very warm and want to be undressed (down to his nappy) but yet despite being too warm he will sometimes wraps up in his blanket and can often be seen cuddling up with Chiron.
Why anchors?
I’ve done no real research other than observation on this topic and I can safely say I’ve done quite a bit of that. I am aware that there is a similar phenomenon in children but the reading on that subject seems to link its being caused by a different source to an anchor of a little who’s into their teenage years or an adult.
It seems that these items are often manifested as items that are bedtime related. Something that can be taken to bed or be there at the bedside when it’s bedtime to sooth a little into a state of comfort. Without much research in the field, I’ve found that even when not in a headspace that the ‘need’ to have the item tends to remain.
In my experience these items have to be considered something of note in a littlespace. A mobile phone or other items that you don’t associate with being ‘cute’ in a littlespace sense never seem to be anchors. I’ve come across, plush toys, blankets, pillows, and even things like hard plastic dinosaurs being anchors. Albeit the latter one being something that particular little left on his bedside table at night.
One of the more interesting things I’ve noticed over the years is that anchors tend to be something that the little often doesn’t feel is as important as their CG might have noticed the item to be. Sometimes there’s a level of active denial to that fact and even more significantly they suggest they don’t need it as much when the topic is brought up and make an effort to demonstrate that fact. However, eventually after a period of time they generally return to their old ways without thinking about it and the anchor gets back in use.
Does it have to be nearby?
It’s always been hard to say about this. Nearby as in accessible within seconds certainly seems to be a case of being a no, at least most of the time. But the other side of the coin is that situations like being away on a trip for a week seems that the item is an essential one that they feel must be packed above all other regards.
The middle-ground in my experience is less clear cut. I’ve felt that anchors do often seem to be left behind in some circumstances, for example visiting a friend who’s not littlespace aware for a day. Then again, visiting a friend who is littlespace aware changes that back most often to an essential item for packing to take.
So it seems that social conventions play a part in this interesting aspect of littlespace. For situations where it’s socially acceptable to have the item then it will feature, if it’s not socially acceptable or might risk some real or perceived ridicule then it will stay behind.
Can a little have more than one anchor?
In my experience there seems to generally be one main one, I won’t say that there can’t be more than one all the time. What I have experienced is that a little can possibly have several different ones that change based on moods or other factors such as a blanket one day and the next when feeling in a strong headspace mood it change to be their teddy bear.
My observations however are, that it always seems to be just the one item that grabs the attention of the little and that they latch to at any one time. Other items can seem to be like an anchor but often unlike the anchor are more fluid in their necessity to be available to a little.
“But I don’t have any anchor”
Maybe not, but then all of what I’ve posted comes about in discussion of my exposure to a very small minority of the AB/DL/CG/Littlespace community, the ones who find headspace to not be a sexual arena in any real way. It could also be that you do have an anchor but haven’t experienced yourself feeling comfortable enough around others for it to show up. I’ve known several littles who don’t seem to show this trait to start with, but, over time the trend started to develop as they become comfortable in being who they really are.
People might say this is not scientific at all, and I never suggested it was, it’s just theory. In my favour, I’ve at least started the conversation on the topic and if you want to go out and research it, then you’re more than welcome to look in to it.
Edit: Forgot the important bit that goes in with the nappy bag as he can’t be trusted to last when we’re out.
Fun Activities - sure to please that special little in your life
Help your little tie his or her shoes
Wash his or her hair in the bathtub
Pet your little’s head
Pick out his or her clothes
Pull him or her into your lap
Get his or her pacifier if you notice him or her chewing their lips, fingers, or acting nervous
Cuddle him or her
Make your little giggle (tickles, jokes, etc)
Use little dishes for a meal you’ve prepared
Bring him or her a drink in a sippy cup or bottle
Stick a crazy straw in their drink
Hold their hand in public (especially when crossing the street)
Order for them at a restaurant
Drive them places (and pick them up)
Go to your little’s doctor’s appointments with them
Help him or her make tough choices (be their guide)
Let him or her fall asleep on your lap or chest
Ask them to help you with little tasks and things
Ask if they help with little tasks
Tell him or her when they are a good girl or boy
Tell him or her when they make you proud
Take care of them when they are sick or feeling under the weather
Remind your little to take their medicine (and praise them for taking care of their health)
Suggest naptime, especially if your little seems crabby or excessively irritated
Read to him or her (naps, bedtime, any time)
Ask your little about their favorite things (and tell them about yours) (animals, colors, shapes, stuffed animals, etc)
Whisper secrets to him or her
Go through their coloring pages, artwork, drawings, or crafts and tell them which ones are your favorites
Teach him or her new things
Remind your little about their plushies’ names
Ask your little about their plushies and toys
Tuck them in at night (including a kiss on the forehead)
Remind them of their bedtime
Remind them to brush their teeth before getting into bed
Ask if your little remembered to do things (chores, errands, other tasks)
Kiss the top of your little’s head or forehead frequently
Color with your little
Check for mean-monsters (under the bed, in the closet, in the dark room they need to go to or through)
Listen to their excited babbles and chatter (get excited with them)
Play pretend with your little
Take your little to a park
Push him or her on the swings
Let your little pick the movie on movie night
Tell your little that they are cute/adorable
Kiss all of their owies, ouches, and boo-boos
Use awesome band-aids (colorful, cartoon characters)
Surprise your little
Get your little ‘little’ gifts
Set up a bubble bath
Let him or her draw a tiny heart on you
Check on your little’s planner, chore list, or errand tasks
Make music with your little
Pick out their jammies, PJs, or sleep clothes
Cook with your little (and, sometimes, for your little)
Take your little to the zoo
Take your little to the library (and help them pick a little book)
Plan and go on a picnic
Take a walk with your little (and hold their hand)
Take your little stargazing
Visit a museum with him or her
Paint your little’s toenails (or let them be silly and paint yours)
Make sure he or she has something to cuddle (on the couch, in bed)
Invite him or her to a special tea party (with their favorite stuffed friends)
Ask about your little’s imaginary friends
Plan a themed date night
Plan a great adventure with them (even if it’s silly and make believe)
Play board games with him or her
Play video games with him or her (or watch them play them)
Do arts and crafts with him or her
Give your little candy/sweets (but not too many)
Make your little hot cocoa with marshmallows
Help build blanket forts
Rub your nose gently against theirs to give special Eskimo kisses
Show them a place they’ve never seen before
Whisper “shhh” in your little’s ear when they’re upset
Wipe away their tears (always)
Take your little to see a children’s movie in the theater (let them have a child’s size popcorn too)
Sing with them when they break out into song
Call your little pet names such as: princess, prince, little one, doll, baby girl, baby boy, etc.
Appreciate little gifts they make and give you
Make a funny face at them in public
Scoop your little one up into your arms or lap
Watch cartoons with them
Make your little a healthy snack
Make a meal of special little foods
Give your little an allowance
Have your little complete chores (and check on their progress through the day or week)
Remind your little to wash their hands before they eat
Get things from places they can’t reach
Rub his or her tummy when it hurts
Start a pillow fight
Shoot them with a water gun or nerf gun
Quote from their favorite little books and movies
Ask silly questions
Try to win them a prize at the carnival, faire, amusement park, or any crane machine
Take him or her somewhere where they need to dress up to go to
Ruffle their hair
Boop and bop their nose if their emotions are getting too intense
Let them wear your t-shirt/hoodie/clothes
Write a note and leave it somewhere for them to find as a surprise
Congratulate him or her for doing something they felt was difficult
Start their sleepy music at night to help them relax
Take your little to an amusement park, a carnival, or a faire
Take selfies and photobooth pictures with your little
Make pinky promises with your little
Help your little tie his or her shoes - Done
Wash his or her hair in the bathtub - Done
Pet your little’s head - Done
Pick out his or her clothes - Done lots
Pull him or her into your lap - Done is there another way to have a little?
Get his or her pacifier if you notice him or her chewing their lips, fingers, or acting nervous - Done
Cuddle him or her - Hard to not get this as I don’t get a choice about being cuddled
Make your little giggle (tickles, jokes, etc) - Done 32 carriage train
Use little dishes for a meal you’ve prepared - Done ish :D
Bring him or her a drink in a sippy cup or bottle - Done made him pick his sippy cup out and bottle feeds are amazing
Stick a crazy straw in their drink - adds to the list
Hold their hand in public (especially when crossing the street) - If only society was a bit more accepting, but held his hand in the forest when we went for a nature walk
Order for them at a restaurant - Some day
Drive them places (and pick them up) - Done many times, littles can’t drive :D
Go to your little’s doctor’s appointments with them - Not something I’d want to do but I will sure as heck drop him off if he needs it.
Help him or her make tough choices (be their guide) - That’s what Daddy does surely
Let him or her fall asleep on your lap or chest - Done and one of the cutest things ever
Ask them to help you with little tasks and things - Done, littles should have plenty of these in my book
Ask if they help with little tasks - Eh?
Tell him or her when they are a good girl or boy - All the time
Tell him or her when they make you proud - Constant praise
Take care of them when they are sick or feeling under the weather - We have a system in place for that now
Remind your little to take their medicine (and praise them for taking care of their health) - Not relevant the first bit but the second bit is soooooo DONE!
Suggest naptime, especially if your little seems crabby or excessively irritated - He never listens, I never stop nagging.
Read to him or her (naps, bedtime, any time) - Discussed that tonight :D
Ask your little about their favorite things (and tell them about yours) (animals, colors, shapes, stuffed animals, etc) - may be worth a try
Whisper secrets to him or her - What secrets, there are no secrets, just things littles don’t get to know as they aren’t big enough
Go through their coloring pages, artwork, drawings, or crafts and tell them which ones are your favorites - :( Need this in my life
Teach him or her new things - Not sure that’s very do-able.
Remind your little about their plushies’ names - Chiron and Erin always love you Benjamin
Ask your little about their plushies and toys - Don’t need to Chiron keeps me informed
Tuck them in at night (including a kiss on the forehead) - some Day
Remind them of their bedtime - If Ben will stick to a bed time I will :D
Remind them to brush their teeth before getting into bed - Pictures or it didn’t happen little boy :P
Ask if your little remembered to do things (chores, errands, other tasks) - Well it wouldn’t be fun if Daddy had to remember EVERYTHING!
Kiss the top of your little’s head or forehead frequently - Is there another way?
Color with your little - In planning
Check for mean-monsters (under the bed, in the closet, in the dark room they need to go to or through) - When I send you to bed I bet this will be required
Listen to their excited babbles and chatter (get excited with them) - “Take the dummy out and say that to daddy so I can understand silly”.
Play pretend with your little - Hmmmm
Take your little to a park - DONE!
Push him or her on the swings - We need to try this some day
Let your little pick the movie on movie night - Lets not go there
Tell your little that they are cute/adorable - He always is
Kiss all of their owies, ouches, and boo-boos - We’ve not had any yet somehow!
Use awesome band-aids (colorful, cartoon characters) - see 45
Surprise your little - :D best way forward
Get your little ‘little’ gifts - And watch him lose it in the most adorable way
Set up a bubble bath - How does anyone bath without bubbles
Let him or her draw a tiny heart on you - Sounds so cute
Check on your little’s planner, chore list, or errand tasks - Always doing this.
Make music with your little - Not likely, I’m tone deaf
Pick out their jammies, PJs, or sleep clothes - Just buy him a cute kigu
Cook with your little (and, sometimes, for your little) - Summer time
Take your little to the zoo - Well it is kinda half way between us.
Take your little to the library (and help them pick a little book) - That could be fun
Plan and go on a picnic - padded picnic sounds great
Take a walk with your little (and hold their hand) - is this not #12 again
Take your little stargazing - I love the stars
Visit a museum with him or her - Nothing worth going to nearby that I know of
Paint your little’s toenails (or let them be silly and paint yours) - Bit too girly for a Daddy and his little boy
Make sure he or she has something to cuddle (on the couch, in bed) - I know when you need Chiron little man
Invite him or her to a special tea party (with their favorite stuffed friends) - A bit girly too for us
Ask about your little’s imaginary friends - Not aware of any...........yet
Plan a themed date night - Meh
Plan a great adventure with them (even if it’s silly and make believe) - We’ve had many
Play board games with him or her - I’d rather do the next one
Play video games with him or her (or watch them play them) - I’ve wasted 4 days of January on those so far.
Do arts and crafts with him or her - FINGER PAINTING
Give your little candy/sweets (but not too many) - Silly little boy doesn’t really crave sweets in LS
Make your little hot cocoa with marshmallows - Totally need a bed time routine set up
Help build blanket forts - some day
Rub your nose gently against theirs to give special Eskimo kisses - LittleAlteran needs lots of affection
Show them a place they’ve never seen before - Done this many times
Whisper “shhh” in your little’s ear when they’re upset - How else do you calm a little boy in a bad place.
Wipe away their tears (always) - Never seen any tears outside the first day together. Certainly never would have risked it then, but if you ever need me to little boy I will.
Take your little to see a children’s movie in the theater (let them have a child’s size popcorn too) - I think I’d rather snuggle on my sofa with a film on and the popcorn be home made
Sing with them when they break out into song - I’d rather just sit listening to it as it’s so cute to see
Call your little pet names such as: princess, prince, little one, doll, baby girl, baby boy, etc. - Smelly butt! :D
Appreciate little gifts they make and give you - Wearing it now!
Make a funny face at them in public - My face is always funny
Scoop your little one up into your arms or lap - Impromptu cuddles are mandatory for littles
Watch cartoons with them - What we watching next together little man
Make your little a healthy snack - Buying lunch count?
Make a meal of special little foods - Some day we will
Give your little an allowance - But he feels uncomfortable with the idea
Have your little complete chores (and check on their progress through the day or week) - I’m sure this was already said above
Remind your little to wash their hands before they eat - wet wipes and Daddies job
Get things from places they can’t reach - Why I love that he’s smaller than me as I kinda have to anyway
Rub his or her tummy when it hurts - and watch him squirm with tickliness
Start a pillow fight - Maybe when he moves in
Shoot them with a water gun or nerf gun = OOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooo I have a Nerf gun
Quote from their favorite little books and movies - Not really me
Ask silly questions - I don’t come with not silly questions
Try to win them a prize at the carnival, faire, amusement park, or any crane machine - That would be fun
Take him or her somewhere where they need to dress up to go to - Any suggestions little man
Ruffle their hair - Surely this goes with #3
Boop and bop their nose if their emotions are getting too intense - I see a status one
Let them wear your t-shirt/hoodie/clothes - I can do one better in that he had to wear daddies underwear.
Write a note and leave it somewhere for them to find as a surprise - surprises are great
Congratulate him or her for doing something they felt was difficult - I’m proud so much of his grades
Start their sleepy music at night to help them relax - We will have a bed time routine some day
Take your little to an amusement park, a carnival, or a faire - As above.
Take selfies and photobooth pictures with your little - We have plenty
Make pinky promises with your little - the most firm kind of promises.
My little boy has ways of making my heart melt. There’s so much about him that I love but the way he feels about being with me just defies all logic because I really do not feel like I’m that special of a catch. Certainly when my little is so darned adorable.
God I really wish carrying stuffed animals around with you was socially acceptable
Never not rebloging
I know a @little-alteran who this totally applies to.
These turned out to be so cute.
Me: *does literally anything*
Daddy: aaaaaaawwwwwww
Hi all!
We’ve kinda been taking a break from this tumblr since I’ve been busy with uni exams and @diaperjosh has been working lots, but I’m on summer break now some have some more free time to focus on other things, like this blog!
I’ve added a bunch of posts to the queue and as always, feel free to ask us questions here!
Methinks Lilo had it right; Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind…. or forgotten. Daddy edit: Still not watched Lilo & Stitch…….
For me, one of the most soothing and peaceful sounds is that of a lullaby, but lets be honest, most lullabies don’t match most of our music tastes.
Twinkle Twinkle Little Rock Star is a artist that converts songs across a diverse range of genres into lullabies, from Disney to Avenged Sevenfold, Twenty One Pilots to Hamilton. Whatever your taste in music, you’re likely to find something that sounds familiar.
Twinkle Twinkle Little Rock Star: Website | Youtube | Spotify
Just because my little man introduced me to this :)
@baphomey
@little-alteran - We need to get a shirt with this design on it for you!
Another amazing day
It’s weird to think it’s nearly 3 months since I last got to be with my little boy. Today was finally the end of that streak.
Considering he was a little worried about the idea of meeting up after having a few bad weeks in struggling to find littlespace to escape to. Glad to say I managed to get a hint of little out of him and in public of all places, but I’m sure that him being a tired little bum also helped.
What happens when you’re a little bit older than your little tyke. Cheeky little sausage isn’t he.
*giggles at daddy*
And here we have yet more adorableness.
Nu uh!
And here an example of argumentativeness. :D I can do this ALL day.
What happens when you’re a little bit older than your little tyke. Cheeky little sausage isn’t he.
*giggles at daddy*
And here we have yet more adorableness.
1 Year Anniversary
Today marks the one year anniversary of this blog, but it also represents way more than that. It represents an amazing year in my life, a year of acceptance and self-discovery, of adventure and mayhem, and of making friends that I hope will be with me for the rest of my life.
One year ago today, I came out for the first time. I told @lord-xthon I was a little, and that I wasn’t straight, and they, like so many people since, accepted me for who I am. For that, I will be eternally grateful.
The next day I started this blog, @little-alteran. I’d like to thank every single one of my followers. Everybody who’s liked or re-blogged my posts. Everybody who’s messaged me. You all mean the world to me.
From the confidence that @lord-xthon gave me, I also told @foreveralonenymphomaniac and @perfectlylittlesoul, both amazing people, who showed me what being little meant to them, and pushed me to discover what it meant to me.
45 days later, I got followed by @baby-zachieeee, who messaged me and after many days, and a lot of talking, asked me to be his daddy. Sadly, we weren’t meant to be together, but he remains one of my best friends and I will cherish that friendship forever.
Zach, thank you for helping me build up my confidence, and allowing me to explore the world of CGL with you. I love you little guy.
At the start of May, I got followed and messaged by @babyyboy99. Since then I’ve spent countless nights chatting with him, and we helped each other through some tough times.
Dewi, you truly are my little brother, in all but blood, and I am so proud of you. I can’t wait until we finally get to meet up in real life.
In July, I was messaged by @magni-kvasir, who later agreed to be my daddy. We broke up a while later, but Sal, you are an amazing teacher, and an awesome person. I really hope I get to see your name in the credits of blockbuster movies one day.
Sal, dankon por ĉio. Mi amas vin, mia amiko.
@magni-kvasir also introduced me to @bound-little-pup. Now, there’s so much I could say about him that I don’t even really know where to start. He’s never stopped being adorable, never stopped making me want to pick him up and hug him.
Connor, I love you, my little prince. For as long as you want, I will be happy to call you my little boy. We both know you’ve been through a lot, but you’ve never failed to make me proud of you. I know you doubt yourself, but know this: I believe in you.
You are, and will always be, my little Ember.
In November, @babyyboy99 later introduced me to @bighuggabledaddy.
It has been said many a time that me and Pete are really the same person. He has similar interests to me and reacts to situations in a similar manner. But most importantly, he understands me. He understands how my brain works better than ever I could.
Pete, you somehow manage to say the right things at the right time, and never fail to make me smile. You also are one of the most caring people I’ve ever met. You consistently put others before yourself and i’m glad to have had the honour of talking to you.
Thank you, Pete, for everything. You are an amazing person, however much you try to brush it off.
On the 8th October, @diaperjosh messaged me after finding me on the littles map (password: littlespace). After messaging him near continuously for a week, on the 16th October 2016, I asked him to be my daddy. Since then, I haven’t stopped talking to him, and he hasn’t stopped looking after me.
On the 28th of December, we met up for the first time in real life. Josh and I wrote about it here. The four days we spent together over the Christmas break were some of the best days of my life.
Josh, there are so many experiences that will stick with me for the rest of my life. Breaking down in tears of happiness in your car on the first day we met for example.
Thank you for allowing me to experience littlespace with you taking care of me. You will never know just how much it means to me that you look after me. I really hope the next year allows us to experience even more together.
You’ve done more for me than you could possibly imagine. You’ve been there for me throughout everything, and supported me beyond what could ever be expected of you. I doubt I would still be at uni without you, so thank you. Thank you for pushing me to be better. Thank you for being here for me unconditionally. Thank you for being you.
I can’t wait to be back in your arms in April.
Thank you for being an amazing little boy, more than I could ever have hoped. I’ve experienced more of little/big space with you than ever before and I hope to keep on exploring as long as you will let me be your daddy. You are an amazing little man and deserve to feel safe and happy in littlespace and successful outside of it. If you’ll let me be there for you then I certainly won’t be going anywhere. I could never have imagined this when I messaged you, I thought we’d chat for a bit and then it would taper off as this usually does. There was certainly no expectation from me to end up with a boy who I spend hours of my time taking care of, helping with his homework and setting his bedtimes. April isn’t that far away now.