Just Call Me Dick Master

"You know who I am, the orginal dick!" Indie-semi selective Adam from Hazbin Hotel

[dick-meister]

Indie, Semi-Selective RP Blog for Adam from Hazbin Hotel. Written by Toast. Rules under cut!

Requestable Muses

-I really don’t have much rules I care for, just basic Tumblr RP etiquette, respect for what I’d like to do with my own character and no god modding. Other than that, will get along great!

-This is a 18+ Blog, Minors don’t interact. Mun is 27+ Years of Age. This blog will have explicit materials and dark themes like- Fowl/NSFW language, exploring themes of mental health, character deaths, graphic character harm among other topics. All will be tagged appropriately.

-Another thing! I am really, really bad with first time meeting threads so I prefer to just have our muses have the very basic knowledge of each other that a first meeting thread gets you. (Things like, name, job, ambition, such like that.) I won’t ever allow Adam to know your muses deep dark secrets right off the bat cause… That’s dumb.

-If I don’t get to a reply after two days of waiting, you have all rights to remind me.

-If you’re following with the intent to RP with a side blog you can comment on this post to let me know who you are!

[dick-meister]

"I'm sick and tired of beating around the bush with you! SIT DOWN!"

Well, that’s not what he expected from her but what’s a man to do when a Queen demands something of you? Without a word he slowly lowers himself into a seat where he makes a guess at what she meant. “This about uh…” Come on. What did she mean by beating around the bush?? “…Did I do something?”

[animepopheart]

★ 【志之塚】 「 groza 」 ✔ republished w/permission ☆ follow btt’s fanart twitch stream!

[dick-meister]

"The ability to knock someone up. I...don't think an infant would survive inside of me. I wouldn't be asking this if Wilhelm wasn't insistent on having a heir..."

That guy…

“You know, even if Wilhelm didn’t insist on you doing this… it would have been more than fine to ask for this because you’d like kids with her. Nothing wrong with that.”

“So, I asked around, pulled some favors and one of the proposed agreements would be conjoining you and your source in Heaven together temporarily. Don’t ask how it works cause it gets complicated. Think about it as you possessing your original body to pass on an heir to Willow.

“And don’t you worry about Alicia either, she’d be going into hibernation till you’re all done. Won’t remember a thing and of course, the age from the time of death to now carry over so it won’t be fuck’n weird. You’ll be in your mid to late twenties or so, right? I’ll be watching over the Hill around this time so that takes care of that too.”

“The only caveat that comes with this option is time. Forty-eight hours to get it don… maybe a bit less. Turns out Azrael is pretty damn hard to distract so that’s all you’ll get. What you think?”

Muse mention: @kingdomofbellows

[dick-meister]

One day when I have the itch to write more King Slayer Adam I wanna write more with how demons try and fuck with him. Like, one disguising itself as Eve to try and catch him off guard and he’s got his hands on her cheeks, crying, saying how much he misses her till his hands move down to her neck and squeezes and squeezes, breaking the illusion and snapping the demons neck in his hands. Adam isn’t some lobe sick fool easily tricked by some over zealous wannabe’s exploitation of others longings. Eat dirt dick bag.

[dick-meister]

🎶“I want my P in your V, want you to S on my D, gotta J off on your Ts and FYI I wanna F your A.”🎶

[danger-tits-lute]

Just a bunch of Lutes and their little guys.

Canon-band-guardian

@dick-meister

Picrew

[dick-meister]

Have a Hazel in these trying times

[metaladam]

" There is no 'next life' for sinners. They don't get reincarnated or go to another Hell. All that awaits those pigs is oblivion."

[dick-meister]

“Hahaha~!”

“Thank God. Here I thought all my hard work was for nothing.”

[danger-tits-lute]

"While I agree that the sinners are no better than bugs... we're exorcists, NOT 'exterminators'. Get it fucking right."

[dick-meister]

“Can’t expect the simple minded to remember anything but blasphemy. I’d say they’ll learn but they’ll be ash soon, maybe they’ll remember in they’re next life.”

[dick-meister]

Lute had fallen asleep soon after being given food after her father left, not talking much in between but gratefully accepting the love offered to her by both males of the Constantine household. When she woke up she was hungry and made her way upstairs to see if anyone was still awake. She was surprised to she the light on in GG’s room, having been asleep when he arrived.

Biting her lip she softly knocked and pushed open the cracked door, hoping her father hadn’t made his way to bother her other friend’s household before she got to him.

“GG? Can I come in?”

@danger-tits-lute

After GG had told his parents details of what happened and after a brisk “tough love” moment from his father, he was thrown outside, told that if Atom’s house was so much better then he might as well go live with them. He didn’t plan to go, but the tent outside in the backyard where he normally went when his parents tried to make him learn a lesson had collapsed from a recent storm that passed by.

He had no choice but to walk and when he did get there, Adam cleaned him up, fed him and gave him some time to relax. He didn’t tell Adam what happened but Atom had since he knew.

When he heard Lutes voice, he turns in bed and sits up. His lip was cut, his cheek bruised and a black eye had finally came down from being swollen and once she came in he moved to share room on the bed.

“Are you ok? I heard what happened.”

[danger-tits-lute]

When she pushed GG's door open enough to walk in, she gasped, never mine what happened to her! What happened to him?!

"GG what happened? Did my father hurt you too? I'm so sorry!" She launched herself toward him for a hug. The bruise was evident on her face as well, the both of them bearing the marks of their shitty parents.

She felt another wave of guilt wash over her; it wasn't enough to bother the person who took her in but to go after any friend of hers... it was insanity! How much did her parents hate her? Tears gathered again at the fact that another person she loved had been hurt because of him.

[dick-meister]

GG hugged her tight, at least she was ok. Thank god. Too bad he wasn’t here to help when it happened, so much for being a knight in shining armor but the boy had a dose of reality, one that he wouldn’t forget.

He’s quiet for a while, taking in her scent and burying his head in her shoulder while he held her. Shes safe, that’s all that mattered. Pulling back a little he shook his head at her.

“No. Not your dad.” He said, hoping she’d understand what he meant so he didn’t have to get into it. “My parents let me come over and stay the night so… I guess it’s a surprise slumber party.” He tries his best to joke, sometimes humor worked but smiling made his lip hurt so he looked away and rubbed the back of his neck a little awkwardly. “Sorry… about your dad.”

[metaladam]

Txt: heading to chipotle.

Txt: text ur order or u get nuthin d:

[dick-meister]

[Text:] Justice.

[Text:] One of everything. You can eat it off my ass.

[dick-meister]

Just some coffee shop, he stood in the corner on a stage by himself this time, a small gig with not much space. Hell, it really wasn’t much of a gig. The shop owner heard he’s a singer and told him he could set up for the price of a coffee. It’s not how things usually go… But the exposure was good enough.

🎶“I can't move on, babydoll, Waitin' on calls, flippin' through stations.”🎶

His voice was softer here, maybe it was the environment, maybe it was who he was thinking about but his emotions were falling vulnerably from his lips with every lyric.

🎶“I'm outclassed and it's outrageous, And I'll take it all, babydoll.”🎶

Atom shuts his eyes as his fingers moved along the strings of his guitar, stuck thinking about Her and what they once shared together. It’s as the song said, he couldn’t move on, no matter how much he pushed her out of his mind, no matter the time that distances them and it makes him feel so utterly pathetic.

🎶”Whatever's been weighin' you down.”🎶

Damnit did he crave her in ways he couldn’t help…

[dick-meister]

Like for a sin-day starter.

[dick-meister]

Lute had fallen asleep soon after being given food after her father left, not talking much in between but gratefully accepting the love offered to her by both males of the Constantine household. When she woke up she was hungry and made her way upstairs to see if anyone was still awake. She was surprised to she the light on in GG’s room, having been asleep when he arrived.

Biting her lip she softly knocked and pushed open the cracked door, hoping her father hadn’t made his way to bother her other friend’s household before she got to him.

“GG? Can I come in?”

@danger-tits-lute

After GG had told his parents details of what happened and after a brisk “tough love” moment from his father, he was thrown outside, told that if Atom’s house was so much better then he might as well go live with them. He didn’t plan to go, but the tent outside in the backyard where he normally went when his parents tried to make him learn a lesson had collapsed from a recent storm that passed by.

He had no choice but to walk and when he did get there, Adam cleaned him up, fed him and gave him some time to relax. He didn’t tell Adam what happened but Atom had since he knew.

When he heard Lutes voice, he turns in bed and sits up. His lip was cut, his cheek bruised and a black eye had finally came down from being swollen and once she came in he moved to share room on the bed.

“Are you ok? I heard what happened.”

[danger-tits-lute]

"Be honest. You’re crushing on someone in the band.” -Sus GG to band Lute

"I. Am. Not." What the fuck, GG? Where did he even get a ridiculous idea like that??

[dick-meister]

“Atom? Who’s that? Sounds like someone with a gay first name and a shitty singing voice with shittier guitar skills. Don’t know him. I’ve only had one best friend.”

[danger-tits-lute]

"Be honest. You’re crushing on someone in the band.” -Sus GG to band Lute

"I. Am. Not." What the fuck, GG? Where did he even get a ridiculous idea like that??

[danger-tits-lute]

A tell??!! She so does not!!

“Liar! What is this so called ‘tell’, Mr. Know Lute All. Why would it be any of your business who I crush on anyway??? NOT THAT I HAVE ONE. BECAUSE I DON’T. BUT IF I DID IT WOULDN’T BE ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS.”

[dick-meister]

“Magician! Secrets!!”

“Besides! If you’re crushing on someone, even in the band, and you two break up then it’s gonna be really awkward for everyone! How are we gonna make it big if we’re all pissed off at one another???”

[danger-tits-lute]

“It’s not gunna be awkward…” GG needs to learn when to shut his mouth, even if he’s right for once. “Because there is no crush…”

It was so unfair. Hazel was so good at hiding his emotions GG had no idea they were fucking but miraculously just knows she has feelings for someone?

“Mind you WE fucked and it wasn’t awkward for everyone. Just us. And we moved on. So stop hassling me for a non-issue”

[dick-meister]

“Hey! Don’t say that so nonchalantly!” His face goes completely red and he turns away from her. Stupid… shitty… sexy memories.

“That was a lot different than anyone else you could date. We’ve known each other for like… five or so years?? It’s…. Natural….” No. It’s not but ok.

[danger-tits-lute]

“FI-“

“FIVE YEARS?” Was he for real???

“DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW TO COUNT ASSHOLE? WE’VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR 12 YEARS YOU NUMSKULL.”

Did he just say it’s natural for them to have had sex? That thought comes and goes through her mind quickly.

“CLEARLY YOU DON’T KNOW ME WELL ENOUGH TO KNOW HOW LONG WE’VE BEEN BEST FRIENDS! I HATE YOU GG CHAPMAN!”

“Tell” her asshole. He was probably just making shit up. He just so happened to be right. By coincidence.

[dick-meister]

“OH YEA??? WELL I HATE YOU MORE!!! YOU KNOW IM BAD WITH NUMBERS! LET ALONE YOUVE BEEN MY LONGEST BEST FRIEND SINCE….. EVER!!”

[danger-tits-lute]

"Be honest. You’re crushing on someone in the band.” -Sus GG to band Lute

"I. Am. Not." What the fuck, GG? Where did he even get a ridiculous idea like that??

[danger-tits-lute]

A tell??!! She so does not!!

“Liar! What is this so called ‘tell’, Mr. Know Lute All. Why would it be any of your business who I crush on anyway??? NOT THAT I HAVE ONE. BECAUSE I DON’T. BUT IF I DID IT WOULDN’T BE ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS.”

[dick-meister]

“Magician! Secrets!!”

“Besides! If you’re crushing on someone, even in the band, and you two break up then it’s gonna be really awkward for everyone! How are we gonna make it big if we’re all pissed off at one another???”

[danger-tits-lute]

“It’s not gunna be awkward…” GG needs to learn when to shut his mouth, even if he’s right for once. “Because there is no crush…”

It was so unfair. Hazel was so good at hiding his emotions GG had no idea they were fucking but miraculously just knows she has feelings for someone?

“Mind you WE fucked and it wasn’t awkward for everyone. Just us. And we moved on. So stop hassling me for a non-issue”

[dick-meister]

“Hey! Don’t say that so nonchalantly!” His face goes completely red and he turns away from her. Stupid… shitty… sexy memories.

“That was a lot different than anyone else you could date. We’ve known each other for like… five or so years?? It’s…. Natural….” No. It’s not but ok.