Andulka
Product Placement
No title available
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
Keni
No title available
EXPECTATIONS
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Mike Driver
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
hello vonnie
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
roma★
𓃗
untitled
gracie abrams
Fai_Ryy
$LAYYYTER
Cosmic Funnies
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Canada
seen from Canada
seen from Paraguay
seen from New Zealand
seen from Colombia
seen from Argentina
seen from Vietnam
seen from Colombia
seen from Brazil
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Colombia
seen from Serbia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Türkiye
seen from France
seen from Türkiye
seen from Malaysia
@dicktionaryofdickstraction-blog
I was thinking hard on what to write about this one. I was trying to be sarcastic but couldn’t actually find a word. So I stare at this poor purple thing, I couldn’t workout what this is. Is this a BDSM? Latex? Oh mighty dinosaur forgive me for not being an expert of this shit. But one question remain, wearing all this thing, HOW THE FREAK ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO FUCK? ....or maybe this is a dildo?
Bitch is back! And my lord how i’m in a shock! What am I looking at? Why are there dildos with Obama’s head? Politic is for crazy politicians, but it sure as hell won’t be IN ME!!!
Bridget is back, alright!
Whaddup! So Summer is back eh? Yes she's right, i've been having this thing with abs abs dudes. LOL. But since they're friends, I can't really do anything to them....well...yet. But it's wrecking my head everyday though. Had to see them ripped bodies, very yumm butt, nice biceps, awesome 8packs abs...my lord have mercy. So if you heard the saying 'Guys' brain thinks about sex every 7 seconds, well make it 5 seconds for ladies...er, for me to be exact'.
Bitch is back,
Bridget-needs-to-get-laid-as-well.
summer needs to get laid!!!
the girls been separated for awhile. you can see that from our last post (which is 3 months ago!!)
bridgie dating 2 hot guys, fat-free, her gym-trainer which give her two advantages at once.
april been busy having this on-off relationship (as oways) with her several play-guy.
and zooey, she's pretty much had enough playing and still, looking for a new guy to match her fab-sex-ability.
and me?
nothing's new from summer unless the fact that she needs her fuck buddy!!
finish her off and come back to me puh leaseee!
xx
summer
LMAO!
xx Bridget, April, Summer, Zooey
Zooey: yo! imma ride that shit and pimpin' on the street!
Bridget: nah, you just wanna ride that bike so you can rub the handles as if it was your crush's dick.
Zooey: fo shizzle i will!
Summer: why...?
Zooey: It's a good memorial...
April: what, is he dead?
Zooey: hell no..i just wanna keep the feeling on my hands everyday.
Bridget: that big?
Zooey: nah, that small.
I miss the 'job'.
xx Bridget
Relax Bridget, it was on my breakfast meal too! WHAT!?? WHY WAS IT IN MY BREAKFAST MEAL TOO?!!! I KNOW I NEED A BF TOO! BUT FUCK YOU WORLD, YOUR JOKE AINT FUNNY! *SNAP*! xx Zooey
Girl please, dildo! diiiilllllldddooooo!!!!!!! Do i have to give you a dildo for a bday present?!!! xx Summer
Yes please. xx Bridget
Seriously! The world is trying to rub it on my face! That was my morning coffee!!! It's been a while since i've had dick around me, and now, it's in my coffee!!! Really?! Is that how you remind me that i need a bf?! dang it! fine! i drank it anyway! now the dick is in my mouth....stomach. err...
xx Bridget
Summer: AAAABBBBBSSSSS!!!!
Bridget: Can i jump on you hot stuff?
April: hey there, im april, and you are? wait a sec, who cares, you're hot!
Zooey: Yo chicas, wait up yo...don't be fooled by the abs that he got! White boy might be homo yo!
when your single friend is having a birthday, you do know what to give. I'm not gonna specify gender here since, well, nowadays, chicks and dudes dig dick. so, say hi to this stuffed dicknimals. It will surely made your day. Look, it got eyes, small hands, and a pair of awesomely huge balls...it will great you in the morning, and smile at you all the time! It stays hard too. (Wouldn't it be great if it vibrates as well...?)
xx Zooey
so if you think that a dick can't satisfy you, you can always rub your butt off of that tree. The dick tree. I don't know what the heck happened back in the years when trees were bigger and in their better shape (read: dick shape), but i do believe at that time, people must have worshiped this tree. Your prayers made the tree.....this way. Dick way.
xx Bridget
April: Is that suppose to be a dick tats?
Bridget: what's that box beside that 'suppose to be a dick tats?'
Zooey: Yo that looks like Tacobell or something
Summer: Eeew If i had a boyfriend, and he made that kinda tats, I'd broke up with him in a heartbeat.
Bridget: darling, you wouldn't even be with him at the first place. Look at how big his arm is! Is that an arm or his thigh?
Zooey: seriously y'all bet dude was high on crack when he made this tats!
April: Is it suppose to be a dick?????
Bridget: I dunno April, maybe that's how dragon looks like in Africa?
xx B,S,A,Z
hey dicks,
a kiss, is just a kiss.
doesn't mean that i like you or something.
--
i was, we were, just trying to be polite by not making you a joke if i, we, reject your kiss.
--
yea, i'm sorry.
that's how it rolls.
xx,
april.
Seriously, putting your dick on this machine is like telling Robocop to give you a handjob. Imagine Murphy (aka Robocop) says his fave line while doing it to you.
"Dead or bzzt bzzt alive you're bzzt cumming with me" (Robotic tone)
ps: Careful, It might hurt your penis.
xx Summer
Yoda: “Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the dick Force, and a powerful dick ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its dick energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the dick Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.”
Dildo: "Yo! What's this green lil thing is blabbing about? Hell yeah size matters not! I'm a dick and I'm taller than his whole body!!! Enough said!!!" *SNAP*
Zooey
err... what can I say? Love IS blind right?
xx Bridget
well, I saw that TV Show called 1000 ways to die, Judging by this position, dude is definitely dead. Good one. Good one. xx Zooey My Goodness! Can we send her a diet package? Please? She could be beautiful? Shit! wait a minute! WHO TOOK THE PICTURE???!!! *poor photographer...er..is there a video of this I can watch?* xx Summer SOMEBODY CALL 911!!! xx April
