Guess who's still alive and thriving?
So I'm aware that I've been... exceptionally bad at updating this. Last proper life update in April 2023. But I figured it's about time for a correction.
Short version: did some failing, got some meds, did some succeeding for once, started a new job in a different region, and now kicking ass and taking names as the ward monkey doctor I was supposed to be. And got engaged in the middle of it all.
Long version? Below the cut.
Finished out the rest of my clinical placements. They went swell, especially O&G, which I'm now more convinced than ever I want to pursue. Sure, gynae is my main lean and accidentally ending up as first assistant on a nine-hour op was awesome for a med student, I still loved the obs clinics and CS theatre. When you even like the parts you don't want, it's a win.
Went through the Oriel allocation system for Foundation Programmes, and ended up with my 11th choice. Ouch.
...and then didn't pass written exams. Or resits. Again. And this time, subject to dismissal from the medicine course. Unless...
...there's a reason for a pattern of failing writtens and passing clinicals every time. Guess who after much wrangling, ended up with an ADHD diagnosis, medication for it, and a successful appeal to a second repeat year?
Final year take 2 actually felt so much smoother in many ways. Clinically, familiar enough with the settings to know where to get the most useful experiences. Educationally, coping much better with ADHD-sensitive exam strategies from the personal tutor and reasonable adjustment. Socially, I was moved between different streams rather than slotted into one, which made it easier to make connections and friends.
Decided that I didn't want to have a girlfriend anymore, so I made her my fiancée instead. Not really medical, but too important to miss!
Did final year written exams again... and actually passed this time.
Got allocated through the next Oriel cycle, and after strategically choosing a different but still acceptable deanery, got into the first choice. Not a genuine first choice, but good compromise.
Assistantship (pre-employment apprenticeship) with breast surgery and respiratory went by like a breeze, and extremely glad at the building confidence. Can't lie, having a consultant ask you if you can cover a bay today under indirect supervision 'cos of short-staffing, and feeling confident enough to say "sure, no problem" is wild.
Finally graduated and left the place I've felt trapped by for over half a decade, and was even able to admit I'd miss a few things, like some of the people, the flat I'd lived in, and even the hospital.
Moved to the deanery and took up a new post - as a doctor, at last!
And here I am, starting out in general surgery (don't get too excited, FY1s barely leave the wards and their discharge letters!). Very fond of my fellow FY1s, we're a very tight-knit group looking out for each other, and ended up very lucky with some very supportive SHOs and registrars.
(Shout out also to our very lovely PTs, dietitians, at least some of the nurses, and especially the ward pharmacist, who our whole office adores.)
Have been coping well with the actual work in general surgery. Have had a few rough experiences (like a very traumatic first time on-call), but overall managing well and growing in confidence (helping my much-younger colleagues as the oldest of the group definitely helps building that).
Gaining skills with US-guided cannulation*, doing my own solo reviews/mini-ward rounds, managing a few medical emergencies, churning out discharge letters and death certificates**, getting past my own anxieties to hand out opioids like candy to patients who actually need it. Even ended up mentoring a few medical students of my own, and giving a few departmental teaching sessions coming up!
So yeah. I'm doing okay, I think. đ„Č
*I mean... I suck at it, but I usually end up giving up on the US part and cannulating the patient who's "impossible without ultrasound" without ultrasound. Turns out, I can succeed more often than many of my colleagues have tried and still feel unconfident!
**Don't @ me, all but one were expected and palliated, and none died because of my (in)actions, long may that last!









