she visibly deflates, all the hope she had had of escaping unquestioned bleeding from her body as donna continues to push for her to talk. and martha knows she means well : donna has always been so conscious of marthaâs feelings and opinions since she joined them after what happened with lazarus. it had been just the two of them : martha and the doctor, for a short amount of time but it had become clear in that time together that she just wasnât enough for him. or at least, thatâs what martha was lead to believe. and she had been more than happy for donna to travel with them. martha had been told only one trip to begin with so anything after that was a bonus. but at a time like this, sometimes, loathe she was to admit it, martha resented that it wasnât just the two of them anymore.
      because the doctor didnât notice marthaâs turmoil, he hadnât thought to ask her if she was okay, or even question how quiet she had become since they returned to the tardis. if it had been just the two of them, she could have pushed it all aside, pretended that nothing was wrong, that nothing had changed. she could have thrown herself in to whatever the doctor had planned next and not thought about what had happened in nineteen thirteen until she was alone in her room, far away from the doctor. she canât do that with donna. and that brief moment of resentment disappears as suddenly as it had arrived, because how could she be anything but grateful to have donna there by her side ?
still. despite knowing that donna is persistent and adamant where martha is concerned, she canât help but try and dissuade her anyway.     â   i know,   â     she stresses quietly, arms crossing over her chest.     â   i know you didnât ask about him.   â     lower lip is gently tugged between her teeth as she stares at donna, being extra conscious of not turning her head to look at the doctor over her shoulder. the offer of leaving, of going to the library : a room on the tardis that martha finds particular comfort in secluding herself within for hours on end ( when they arenât running for their lives, of course ) is tempting. and it shows in the way she releases her lower lip and her head turns slightly towards the doorway, contemplating the offer before she nods imperceptibly and offers her friend a small if strained smile.     â   yeah, alrighâ     tea sounds good.   â     but she doesnât want to talk about this. she really doesnât. maybe it would be good for her, sure. but truthfully, martha thinks it might be donna who needs this more than she does. and thatâs the only reason why she gives in, albeit reluctantly.
  martha turns when the doctor speaks, startling her slightly and she smiles up at him standing by the tardis console. she hadnât noticed him behind her, the way he may have listened in, so as far as sheâs concerned, he has no idea that anything is wrong anyway. nothing is wrong, she thinks stubbornly. but she shrugs at the doctor as donna interrupts him, realising that she has already started to walk away and she hurries to catch up, avoiding the doctorâs eyes as donna turns back to him and she sighs heavily, her exhaustion catching up with her now that she knows they wonât be thrown head first in to another situation. she keeps walking as donna threatens him, her smile softening in amusement as she rolls her eyes.     â   anyone ever tell you youâre a little bit scary ?   â     martha asks of donna with a lightly teasing tone of voice. sheâs delaying the inevitable, she knows that, but donna could at least give her this. the walk to the library, before she has to talk about the past two months and how absolutely miserable it had been for her. her throat closes up slightly at the reminder, her teeth biting in to the inside of her cheek. she would never hold it against either donna or the doctor, but they really donât have a clue about what it was like for her there. her hands move to rub at her shoulders for warmth, already thinking about the throw blanket she had left in the library before the family had started hunting them. her pace quickens a step or two.
âi havenât been a little scary since primary. the words youâre lookinâ for,â thereâs a haughtiness to her words, to the rise of her chin thatâs unexpected given the conversation, âis that iâm a right bitch.â donna smiles easily at that, her typical short and loud laugh bursting through shortly after. with martha thereâs no anxiety over her pushy personality or having to shuffle for a simpering-enough facade.
smoothly, she wraps her left arm around the younger womanâs shoulder while keeping them moving. donna had noticed the twitch in her expression, not to mention her arms holding herself tightly. the instinct to hug martha close isnât one that she double-thinks, rather itâs a missed connection. just like donna hadnât hidden her true traits from martha, she had been open in her inclination for tight embraces, shoulder bumps, side pokes, and all the little touches that too many of her acquaintances ( she knew what true friends were now, and sheâd be damned if she was going to let them slip away ) considered too much.
for a moment, they walked together in companionable silence. the tardis didnât even try any foolery in changing their path, likely being able to tell that both were more tightly wound than obvious. the old girl was intuitive like that, or it might be better to say that as a telepathic ship she knew her inhabitants well. as well as she can for a mere human, donna sends a mental thanks for making their walk smooth and a request to not help the doctor find his way to them just yet. thereâs no way for her to know if her message got across, not even a morse-code flicker of the hallway lights, but having thought it calms her own anxiety. for all her posturing, she was well-aware that the doctor had the final say â she was just endlessly lucky that the doctor was more socially-inept than overbearing.
donna pats marthaâs shoulder, still not releasing her hold. itâs not a vice grip, almost resembling more of a casually slung guiding hold. she keeps her gaze on their path as they walk, knowing that she still had to go make the tea and hoping the tardis gives her a fork close to the library, âyou know, my mother always told me i should listen to the lilâ voice tellinâ me tâstop. never listened, especially when my grandma said the opposite. drove mum crazy. that was more a plus than not though, anâ iâd end up sneakinâ out the window eâen when she got all splotchy red.â her free hand comes up in an empty shrug, âsheâd say itâs a mystery where i âget the gall,ââ her voice takes on a shrill and mocking pitch before dropping back to her drawling register, âbut lookinâ back now, sâpretty clear i had a good source.â
they turn a corner and find the library doors opened before them. she lets go of martha as she steps forward to the fireplace, letting out a delighted sound as it starts on its own. âbrilliant, now iâve got to get the kettle goinâ. iâll just be a tick.â she spins on her heel, ready to keep going when a clatter sounds outside the door. she goes to check it, returning to the couch with a large grin, two mugs, and a teapot steaming ready. âeven better! guess the tardis stillâs got surprises for us.â donna gives them an additional moment of respite as she serves the tea and gets comfortably seated, but when she looks at martha again, thereâs a perceivable expression of patience on her face.
âright. iâm all ears, anythinâ you wanna get off your chest, youâre safe tâdo so. includinâ if itâs crying.â she slices a hand in the air, âiâm serious, no holds barred, love.â
snowghoul
2087
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
janainaart
blakekathryn
