ZARIA FANEL
est. 1995.11.02 Princess of Fanelia
3rd Year SNU student
Guarded by LUCIFER
CURRENT STATUS: in hospital â OC ROLEPLAY BLOG â
SFW & LITERATE
I havenât been here in a long time and so far my muse for Zaria only seems to linger around on AIM. But at this point, Iâve decided to drop Zaria, as my muse for her isnât enough to let me stay on the dash. Sheâs still available to rp with on aim via [email protected]. Thank you to everyone who was good friends with my muse, and helped her with her plot.
Please make sure to reblog this post before the end of this Monday (06/06, 11:59 PM KST) if you donât want to be out of an apartment by the end of the week.
This is now mandatory. We will no longer have mid-check warnings, and anyone who doesnât reblog this will be automatically taken out of the tenant list. We will be less lenient about moving back in from now on.
People on (non-expired) hiatus will still be exempt, of course.
Make sure that your URL is the same as the one thatâs listed in the main tenant list. If you changed without informing the building, we will assume that you have since moved on and have no interest in staying.
Please try to reblog the activity checks from the main account. If you were to reblog this from another tenantâs post and he/she deactivate his/her account, we will not be notified of that reblog.
It doesnât matter how new you are; please reblog this to make sure that you donât get take off. Thank you!
Think of this post as your rent notice. Failure to comply will leave you without a place to stay.Thank you for your time, and have a good day tenants!
His body faced the bed, but his head was looking down to the floor. Tiredness started burdening his senses while Seungyoon was guarding her from his seat. The rustling sound coming from the bed sheet and light movement surprised him. A voice which used to greet him in cheerful manner was uttered in weakness and hoarse voice. Seungyoon looked up and met Zariaâs eyes. Even though he had told himself to stay content through the situation, but witnessing her tragedy with his own eyes was enough to crumble his temper. His mouth trembled and wordless, tears dropping on his cheek.
âHey,â he began and rubbed her idle arm. Seungyoon saw her looking for something, and he leaned in to check on her needs. âWhat, what is it? Do you want to sit up?â He looked up around the bedâand wiped off the tears in betweenâand grabbed the remote. After struggling on how to make the bed worked, he finally pressed the right button. The head of the bed began to lift and he adjusted the angle to make her feel comfortable.
The cast on her right arm and leg devoid her from feeling his touch, but his voice was enough to catch her attention as she laid back carefully onto the bed. With the remote found and the angle changed, she held up her free hand to motion when it was fine and she smiled weakly. Â âOppa... d-did I worry you...?â
It felt like she was a mess by being right here in front of him, trying to reach up with her free hand to touch to his face. âOppa... itâs... been so long since... I-I last saw you...â She exhaled softly, taking her time. The pain had been in and out, as well as the medication, which was evident with how much (or little) was actually still left in the pouch hanging by her IV.
Meme: Send me Anonymous messages as my muse's child!Status: Accepting !
Having visions were something that Zaria knew she could never get over. It haunted her, no matter how fresh it was. The agony of knowing the child she had with Lucifer was gone, only hours after hearing the babyâs heartbeat during the ultrasound. Just getting Lucifer to come around and be able to take notice that he wasnât the only one hurting was a time and a half in figuring out and managing to do, but the arguments were also just as endless. It was a constant âIt was my faultâ and âNo, itâs my faultâ, or the atypical âYou shouldnât be with me, youâre not safeâ and âI love you and Iâm not leaving you no matter whatâ. Regardless of what it was, it still happened.
The first of her casts and braces to come off was her neck brace, granting her more freedom to look around. Her ribs were still in the process of healing, on top of her current fractures, and she was in and out of X-ray to make sure that she was doing well in the process.
But when she fell asleep, it was like the Sandman never came to cast his dust upon her. As if she wasnât confined to the bed or having to get into a wheelchair that she could just slide off the hard white casts off her body like so. It allowed Zaria the freedom to slip off the bed, Lucifer curled up on a chair and sleeping but far from responsive to the shakes of his shoulder.
It was a completely dreamlike state, and Zaria just didnât know what to do. It wasnât like the vision she had when she was in her room and Luciferâs ex-girlfriend had somehow drowned her in the process - despite Lucifer telling her that it wasnât like Elena to do that - so Zaria had to ... think.
The halls were empty, like some sort of ghost story film with flickering lights, but instead, there was a little boy, wearing the very same necklace that Zaria wore around her neck.Â
She stopped and stared, watching the boy, and uncertainty crossing her features until the child took notice of her. It was no more than eight years old, a big toothy grin on his face as he came running to her, shouting, âMommy!â It took her by surprise when he hugged her leg and was glued there until she crouched down, instinctively, like she could definitely trust this child.
He had Luciferâs slang of talking. Her eyes. His face. His nose and her smile. And when he could see that she doubted it, he had her wings. âMommy, itâs me!â he announced again, so gleefully. âIâm eight years old now!â
Eight years old. When they lost him, he was eight weeks old inside of her.
She was a grieving mother on the inside. And that came up to the surface for her to cry, holding her child close. Her face buried in Uriel's shoulder, sobbing and weeping while he did the same in holding her, rubbing her back soothingly in the best way that a child could. âUriel... Uriel.. my baby... Iâm so sorry... Iâm sorry I couldnât save you...â She was on her knees, holding him like this and even then, her little prince also begun to shed his own tears.
âMommy... I really miss you...â
It was all her fault. She told Lucifer to hit the gas. If she told him differently and to stay with the emergency signals on the rear lights, then maybe they couldâve avoided it. But it was all her fault. No matter how much Lucifer tried to take the blame for himself... it was her visions. It was because someone was trying to kill them-- no, they were trying to kill her. But they did kill her. They killed her on the inside... left her empty and took away her happiness. Her unborn child that was supposed to come alive as a result of her and Luciferâs love... was gone.
âIâm so sorry, baby...â she stammered out between sobs, rocking them both back and forth. âIâm so sorry.... I-Iâm so s-sorry...â
After going through human barriers for the third time, Seungyoon was finally able to enter the exclusive area of the hospital with a guidance from a nurse. He could had been to see her 15 minutes sooner if only he was not stopped by bodyguards whenever he walked past a door. It was hard without Lucyâs help to pass through them, yet the man was nowhere to be found when Seungyoon needed him. It was already the third day after the car accident he witnessed on television, somehow Zariaâs name had made her a well-known star athlete that the accident was covered in flash news. Seungyoon couldâve felt proud if it was about her winning another medal, but apparently the situation might cause her to lose the greatest gift. His fist tighten as he imagined the worst.
He prepared an ID in hand, in case he had to face another inspection once he entered the room where Zaria was resting. The nurse left after assisted him to the room, leaving Seungyoon alone at the doorway. It was unlock, so he dragged himself inside. The room was spacey with big windows for fresh air and light, and he found Zaria was lying on her bed, sleeping. Seungyoon walked closer, and her wounds became more visible. He sighed, eyes were still swollen from thinking about her the other day. âGeez, ZâŠâ he murmured, his hand find its way to her lean fingers, resting lifelessly against the bed surface.
Seungyoon dragged a chair closer next to the bed and sat his tired self there. He watched her chest moving ups and downs from breathing, and tears began to build up on his eyes again.
The whole royal family and Lucifer were exhausted at this point. Especially for the young couple, after the news about their baby, leaving Lucifer to be so lost and like a zombie in her presence while Zaria tried to find some sort of way to overcome her grief and call it a need to be occupied. But not even her mother allowed her that opportunity to even so much as do homework, but to make sure her daughter focused on getting better. Retorts like, âI canât heal my bones with concentrationâ were silenced, and Zaria could only fall asleep whenever the morphine was strong in her blood.
She was in and out of sleep, and the last time she checked, neither her parents or Lucifer were in the room with her. Instead, she was all by herself and sleeping some more.
The next to stir her from her sleep was the touch of her fingers, that she couldnât recall if it was her uninjured left arm, or the fingers of her right. She was too dazed, too tired, to even focus on it, but it slowly pulled her up to the surface of reality. With the neck brace around her neck, there was only so much that she could turn to see who it was once she opened her eyes. A few slow blinks and she came to, hoarsely whispering, âO-⊠OppaâŠ?â Just even uttering that single word incited a cough and pain in her chest that she grabbed a pillow to hold to her chest with a grimace while she coughed.Â
It took a moment but she got herself to calm down, searching for the remote to have the bed sit her up. âS-SorryâŠâ
Z!! My cute little sister from different parents whoâs grown up too fast!! I still have a slight resentment toward her boyfriend for knocking her up, hah. Weâve known each other for a while, and although we started it rough with me getting drunk in front of her, I guess thatâs when we set the boundaries of our friendship [âchuckles] Then one day she began talking about this one guy I didnât know and all I could do was giving her my point of viewânot sure if it was helpful but I appreciated that she would trust her problem on me. Iâve never had sisters in my life and because of her Iâve learned the feeling of getting protective to a person I care about. Iâm usually an ignorant about what others do with their lives unless I have a romantic feeling for them, but starting from Z I begin to think differently of how to treat the opposite sex better.Â
[ So I started my new job this week, but it seems to be incredibly busy, since it seems like the company is falling behind in a lot of things and Iâm able to help them pick up the slack where they fell short. Iâm not gone, but just a warning that my already-slow replies will be sparse. Iâm also on aim as zaria.fanel while Iâm at work (which is more convenient for me to rp too) but please let me know who you are when adding me! ]
her parents were here â and they werenât supposed to tell her parents untilâŠwell, definitely not under circumstances like these. and he supposed he should be worried about getting fired, or her father stabbing him with a sword, but he couldnât. there was something in him that refused to function anymore, that had accepted that he couldnât, not while zaria was here, and not while zaria was in that state because of him.
no, he couldnât let that guilt ruin him in front of her. maybe later, when he was told to go home and take a shower, but never in front of her. (she deserved better than that. than him.)
so he translated, as he was asked, and did so with the stiffness of a robot. seeing her like that broke him in places that couldnât be fixed, and that he couldnât heal from. and he knew that this wasnât the news they were looking to hear, either, and he felt the slightest pull of a black hole in his chest â the same one he had been trying to resist in her presence.
âand the baby?â he asked in korean (almost blurted it out, really), although that was perhaps slightly rude to her parents â well, heâd regret it later, even if there werenât any repercussions. he held her hand tighter, too, as if sheâd leave once she heard the answer that they both might already know. âwhat about â what about our baby?â
She didnât care that they were in front of her parents. She was going to break down some way, somehow, and even a princess had feelings. She was still a human with wings embedded into her back. The princess that withstood twenty years of not crying had broken down in the silence of their apartment when she fought with her boyfriend, when she heard their babyâs heartbeat, and for so many reasons that the royal couple would see that their daughter was still breakable both mentally and emotionally.
Lucifer asked the question, and her parents could only look at Zaria questioningly that she had to whisper the single Japanese word for âbabyâ so that they would understand.Â
Realization crossed their features, but rather than being upset that Lucifer was the one who impregnated her, they were just as worried. All eyes were on the doctor, and Zaria could feel her hand shaking in his firm grip as she sniffled. She knew the answer but she wasnât sure if she could hear it.
The doctor let out a heavy breath and lowered his head. âIâm sorry. We couldnât save the baby.â
Her body trembled and the emotions came crashing down on her. Like her whole world of happiness was gone in those words that she was shaking and tears pouring down her cheeks with a grief-stricken cry that had the guards outside coming in to see what was wrong. Her hand couldnât figure out if she wanted to let go of Luciferâs hand or to tug him to her to be held. She didnât care if she was in front of her parents who had never seen her cry, the couple frozen and uncertain of what to do for their daughter as they could only watch the two take in the news that didnât need translating. Everything had gone blank in Zariaâs mind, the pain in her pelvic region now explained.Â
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