my moon / *moondrac
he says your name , and you think you might cry for the first time in hundreds of years . ( he gave you a name , and in return you gave him your heart . ) you could never forget your name , but you had forgotten precisely what it sounded like coming from his mouth . had forgotten precisely the way his lips move to form each syllable . had forgotten that his voice is sweeter than any song you have ever heard .
you move on instinct , taking another step forward and grasping his hands in your own . you bring them up to your face , pressing your lips against his knuckles as your eyelids flutter closed . your heart feels heavy , but at the same time it feels as if it has taken flight . and for a moment you stand there , soaking in his presence .
he's here . he’s alive . ( you’re here , too . and those things in tandem are , you think , the most wonderful in this or any other world . ) you finally look back at him , and you think you might never look away . ( in this moment , the noise of the marketplace has fallen away . )
( in this moment , nobody exists but the two of you . )
your love , which started among the stars , that has spanned centuries , envelops you , surrounds you like a gentle breeze , brings you together . ( he is here . you are here . if you believed in miracles , you would say that this is one . )
finally , finally , you speak to him . ❝ it is . i am here , belenus . ❞ his name , from you , is closer to a song , closer to a prayer . ( a benediction to the only thing that has ever mattered to you : love . )
another breath , one that feels as if you had been holding it for years , for centuries ( and maybe you have ) and your lips form the barest hint of a smile . ( albeit one tinged with sadness , with guilt . ) ❝ and you — you are really here . i thought i would never see you again . i thought . . . ❞ you can’t bring yourself to say the words aloud . ( you have not once said them out loud , would not have , even if you’d had somebody to speak them to . )
you watch, heart pounding in your ears, breath erratic. you think you might cry ( from sorrow, from joy, from being lost, from being found, from love. ) you know what he means. i thought you were dead. and, you might as well have been these past hundred years. dead on your feet, dead in your heart you hid away because of how FRAGILE it felt.
hearing your name from his lips is something akin to a PRAYER. you, so starved for his attention and affection and worship. you move your hands out of his and you quickly wrap your arms around him and pull him into a hard hug. he’s taller than you, and stronger, and WARMER. ( he was ALWAYS warmer, you think. )
you let out a chocked sob, not realizing how much you had MISSED him until now. eletha eletha eletha. you gave him that name. you gave him that name and he KEPT it.
you pull away and drag his head down more to your level, your hands on his cheeks and a teary smile on yours. ❝ i know, eletha. i know. i’m sorry. you must’ve been so confused and hurt . . . ❞
a kiss on his cheek and you forgot what it was to feel his touch.
❝ i didn’t . . . i never wanted to bring you pain to the thought of my death. but i didn’t know where you went . . . i didn’t know if you’d come back . . . and i . . . ❞
a pause, ❝ i lost faith in the war, i didn’t know how else i’d leave in the middle of it. i’m sorry. ❞
