Providence On Foot

Photos from walks through my favorite city. All photographs are taken by me unless otherwise stated. Please don't steal. Thanks!

[dreamsphoto]

friend: why are you in a rush?

me: i gotta get home

friend: why?

me: i've fulfilled my quota for socializing today

[detectivetrash-deactivated20170]

I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this garbage chute tentacle monster thing is going

[kmunro]

If your spending New years eve at home not doin shit reblog this !!🙌🏽✨ You not alone lol

[nessieskitchen]

We’ve started our Youtube channel.  Please check out our first video, and subscribe if you’d like to see more! :) Thanks for looking!  

<3 Nessie’s Kitchen

[dreamsphoto]

If you’re curious what i’ve been up to lately, check out my new video series. hope you like it!

[brutereason]

People from fucked up families do not owe people from ‘normal’ families the performance of ‘normality’ or happiness, especially around the holidays. The hot shame and terror you feel when people ask “What are you doing for Christmas” or say “But what about your faaaaaamily!” without realizing that their small talk is your stuff of nightmares is real, and I’m sorry. It’s such a shitty combination of feeling put on the spot, shown up for not being ‘normal,’ maybe with the stab of grief for the memories you *should* have had, and anger at the happy obliviousness of the questioner.

#783: How do I tell my dysfunctional folks I’m not spending the holidays with them this year? | Captain Awkward (via brutereason)

Ten thousand finger snaps for how good this piece is.

(via outforhealth)

[dreamsphoto]

i don’t like halloween.  there i said it.  the last time i was allowed to go trick or treating was when i was 6 and my siblings and i were dressed as “fishers of men” before my parents decided that darkening the doors and keeping us inside and telling us that it was satans night was better for their children then letting them enjoy silliness with their friends.

but the first time i really spent time with my bff was carving pumpkins at her house in prep for her family’s party.  she still loves it, and we had her party last night.  i went and had a nice time, but i just don’t get what is so fun about dressing up and all that because it was denied me so long.... was it denied too long? idk, i’m just having a rough day, and i know its going to start with thanksgiving and christmas garbage so soon, and i just hate all of it.  

i’m glad i’m seeing my therapist on thursday as its been almost 2 months with my surgury recovery taking up all my time.

[dreamsphoto]

can’t sleep.  head cycling between my horrible thoughts and feeling like i’m an asshole who only thinks of herself.  i can’t stop crying.  

[dreamsphoto]

felt like shit telling someone i care about that i can’t listen to their problems anymore.  i can’t take what i’m hearing. it hurts hearing it. i don’t know how to process other peoples very shitty experiences.  i had to ask her to stop telling me things.  i have suggested a therapist a few times.  i can’t be her therapist.  i don’t know how to cope with what i’m hearing.  i can barely cope with my own shit. 

and now she feels like shit for dumping this crap on me.  and i feel more like shit.  but how am i supposed to help, this isn’t my area of expertise.  i do distraction. i do avoidance. i’m good at those things. that’s how i cope.  but she doesn’t know or enjoy avoidance or distraction. 

i want to help. but i can’t help the way she wants.  so i feel shitty.  and i don’t want to make it about me.  i hate that i had to. but what am i supposed to do?

[mayuzane]

[dreamsphoto]

i woke up upset. dunno what triggered me, but all i could think about was the one time my mom hit me, and the one time my father didn’t.  

i used to suck my thumb as a kid.  i was, i dunno, 12? i had my thumb in my mouth, and my mom raced across the kitchen to spank me. 

i don’t remember why that time he was going to spank me, but while we were praying over the goddamned belt, i started to cry and beg not to be hit, and for whatever reason this time he relented and left.

i always had this thought that it was only abuse if it was in the heat of the moment.  if it was deliberate i deserved it, and it wasn’t abuse...

i really wish there was a way to remove those memories.  all of them actually... i would sign up for the eternal sunshine treatement if it were a real thing....

[mia-moscovitz]

[axel-d0rland0]

LMFAO LITERALLY ME

[cesario-viola-deactivated201608]

[jjabramsed-deactivated20181104]

Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele photographed by Peter Hapak for Variety Emmy Studio.

[dreamsphoto]

lol @ dudebro who said he could “do whatever you can do”.  say that to me and I’m going to have you doubled over, turning red and crying, while I take a bigger hit with no coughing.  try me bro.  you don’t know me.  you don’t know how much i smoke.  you can’t take me on.  

its always fun to show dudebros how wrong they are just by giving them what they say they want....

[dreamsphoto]

New mermaidy hair

[dreamsphoto]

I’m trying out “McNesserson” as my new last name...  we’ll see if that sticks or changes... i also deleted 60+ people from my facebook, including all family members and their church friends.  My therapist says I need to stand up for myself more often.  this is how I’m starting.

[tiepoloblues]

I’m physically, mentally and emotional wiped out and I need to be cuddled and have my hair played with and complimented every 20 seconds but I also need to be left the fuck alone for 6 to 8 days, minimum 

do you see my problem?