Yeah, go on. Hit it first time. pic.twitter.com/I8N8lCFF56
— MUNDIAL (@MundialMag)
August 17, 2019
It's been a while since I've been active on here. It's not because of the porn ban!!! (Ok, it was sort of the porn ban: I saw it as a harbinger of tumblr's decline--I'm a shameless frontrunner in social media). Anyways, the one thing that tumblr is better at than twitter, my more active social media home, is for getting a little bit drunk and having a little bit of insomnia, and writing nonsense for a few more characters than those glib motherfuckers at Twitter let you have. Anyways, I just noticed how lovely this goal was. The first touch is skillful and impressive, of course, but the most immediate cause isn't the man who struck the ball, the movement of the ball, or the fact that the ball enters into the goal in the top left corner. The thing that seems so beautiful is the goalkeeper's leap, which does nothing functional to keep the ball out of the goal, which is really the only charge of his office. He fails, but look at how beautiful he is at it. Now, in fact, the "goal" is beautiful through a combination of him and the movement of the ball. The scorer himself is probably the least important part of the goal's beauty, but he gets all the glory for it. I mean, yes, he was responsible for the flight path of the ball, so he should be credited with the goal, well done, you. But if it was an empty net, it would be an ugly thing, unnecessarily tortured. You'd think to yourself, fuck, I'm not having that guy line up for penalty kicks. The goalkeeper's leap would still be impressive to watch without that flight of the ball, although maybe less so. Now, the scorer had to put the ball where he had to, and to try it from there was bold and confident, and that's impressive and important, especially when it's a sport that's so low scoring. But it's not beautiful. What's beautiful is the goalkeeper's flailing, futile, arching grasp. He bends around trying to contort his body, frustrated by gravity. He extends so gracefully, not frantic and frenzied, he hangs in midair for just a microsecond longer than seems necessary. If he had frozen, planted himself in the grass, he would sitll have contributed to the beauty of the goal, but the balance would swing towards the scorer, and we could discredit the goalie's officiousness. But he jumped and failed with a curvature, which is all that anyone could ask of his office.Whatever kind of dumbfuck I am now, at 34, watching this makes me glad I'm not the dumbfuck I was at 25
