lykomgshekin.

@drunkcrunkfuck

Hi I'm Shekin twenteen australian taken♥ straight and I hate people

8,374 posts

You felt familiar from the moment we met. A lovely kind of déjà vu. When we spoke or laughed or touched, I became overwhelmed by the powerful sensation that I had been here before. And when we kissed, I felt the energies of a thousand lives on our lips, like souls that had known each other all along.

I don't follow you and we have completely different blogs but I wanted to say your text post about being the one who's there for yourself was beautiful

💕💕

A man showing anger and persistence to get you back once you have broken it off isn't proof of any love; it's a knee jerk reaction. A man kissing your ass and making flaccid attempts to be nicer for two weeks isn't proof that he is trying, it's proof that he knows how to defuse you long enough to hook you once again. Take away a toy and a little boy cries, take away a relationship of convenience and a big man cries. Just because he cries doesn't mean you give in to what he wants. Grow some balls! You're not soul mates because you like the same shit and are now comfortable with each other to role play during sex. Show me something deeper than pet names and zodiac sign capabilities. It's a shame a lot of girls don't actually know what it's like to be loved by a real man, you know lust, you know joy, you know passion and you know fear of abandonment. You've put all this faith in this promise that Prince Charming will come for all women but now your getting older and you realise that's not always the case and most of you have never truely been appreciated. Stop chasing your idea of what love should be and recognise what love is. Love isn't promising to act right after he keeps fucking up. People make mistakes true, but love isn't telling a grown man he needs to change to keep you; love is a grown man changing on his own because he can't imagine being without you.

Love shouldn't hurt

And if it does, then maybe you’re ‘loving’ the wrong person.. Love shouldn’t hurt. I know there are many people out there that are going to disagree so do keep in mind this is merely my opinion and you don’t have to agree, after all, there are also many people out there that are in painful relationships or with someone that doesn’t make them entirely happy that they stand by because “between the bad times there’s also good times”. Love shouldn’t hurt. You shouldn’t have to fight for your right to be understood in your own unique way or try to heal old wounds that are never forgiven on either side in a constant tug of war against who is in the wrong or who isn’t. Your ‘loved one’ shouldn’t make you upset or make you feel as if you need to be any different than you are and who you are. Your habits, your passions, the things you do from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. That is not love. Love should be free and untainted, no matter how much has happened in the relationship. If you can’t forgive someone, or if someone can’t forgive you for simply being you and living your life however flawed that may be - then it’s pretty simple, that to me, is not love. Love is understanding someone else beneath it all. Who they are, why they do what they do, or at least seeking to understand both of these things, then forgiving them for any supposed wrong doings because you do understand, and if you love someone, you will always understand. There is no ego involved. There is never ego involved when there is love. It is what it is. It exists.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love is allowing yourself to be vulnerable enough to be known and seen and understood for all you are. Love is what you have between someone that knows you more than anyone in the entirety of the world and that you know more than anyone else. Love is freedom, and purity. Love is unchangeable. Love is happiness in silence. Love is for eternity.

We have to stop lying to ourselves about the way certain people make us feel. We know when people aren't really good for us. We know when things are different. I'm choosing to believe that we aren't supposed to live every day questioning pieces of ourselves, arguing, or wishing things were "how they used to be". I no longer see the point in reminiscing with or about people I don't plan to build new memories with. We have to let what was be just that - what "was" - and focus on making every day in the present a gift towards our future. Making growth a proity to you will teach you who's really for you. I'm learning that sometimes accepting a person for who they really are means acknowledging what the two of you can never be again. When the chemistry is gone, the history doesn't matter.

I hope you know you’ll be okay. That tomorrow, there will be another tomorrow. That life goes on, and some things aren’t meant to work out and one day you’ll realise this. It doesn’t need to be now, so don’t get down on yourself or what you’re experiencing in life. No one really knows where they’re going, even those who are holding maps. You never know when you’re holding a map for the wrong city unless you go wandering seeking the destination you’re so sure you know how to get to. It’s only once you get there do you realise you’re not where you thought you would end up. It doesn’t matter though, in all seriousness, and you’ll soon realise why. Maybe a while from now, when your expectations have faded and all that is left is where you are now, and where you have been. Suddenly you realise you never would have seen the seaside, and neither would you have those scars, the beautiful ones that no one will ever see beneath your skin, painted across your beating heart. But are they really scars? Have they not shaped your every walking moment since; a shadow, a cloud, cupids arrow piercing through your soul only to direct you in a way you never would have known. Maybe it’s not really a scar, just a part of you. Forever more. It once hurt, it once bled, it once seemed like it would never heal. But soon enough, it starts to fade, just like some memories do. Because some things aren’t meant to last forever, and that’s just life. And that’s okay. It’s all going to be okay. Don’t be afraid. Just breathe, and live, and stay true to you. That’s all you need to do. The rest will work itself out. It always does

drunk

Hello.

I don’t know what to write right now, but I feel like I need to write right now.

I'm drunk, slightly... No. I'm drunk.

I'm tired, I'm exhausted, my feet are sore.

I want to be swallowed up right now. I really do.

I want the music to swallow me up,

its the only thing that seems real anymore.

I've got him on my mind. and I'm only self destructing the more that I think in this moment.

Don't remind me of memories, don’t show me places we've been, don't show me anything, at all.

I know that this is so right. everything... but is it that I miss him? or is it that I miss just… collapsing in his arms?

Why does everything that seemed so bad before suddenly seem so... perfect?

Every complaint, every shit moment, every... everything... I want it back.

But then, I don't. At all. Not now anyway.

No, no no, not at all.

Maybe I'm just drunk.

Get your face out of my memory, please.

Erase it.

Erase me ever touching the side of your face, gliding it against your perfect bristle.

Then across your jawbone.

Holding your face in my hand.

Erase your lips. Those lips.

Erase your eyes. Erase your face.

Erase your body, your shoulders, your skin, the hair on your body and the way it felt when I ran my hand against it, erase your flesh and the way it felt when I dug my nails in.

Erase you.

Just go away. Fuck off. Please...

This is normal right? to miss something that was always there only for it to not be?

Like a pet dying?

If you have to speculate if someone loves you and wants to be with you, chances are they don’t. It’s not that complicated. Don’t waste moments waiting and wondering. Don’t throw away your time dreaming of someone that doesn’t want you. No one is that amazing, certainly not the one who would pass you up.

I’d be liar if I said it didn’t fucking hurt. It still hurts, you can move on but when you invest your heart into people you need to remember that they have a way of sneaking back and twisting the knife they left in your back. You need to keep breaking your heart until it opens, until you can let go. Even if the wound runs deeper than you thought, you need to keep breaking your heart until there’s no choice left but to move on

And so it is. This moment together.

I let my hand fall gracefully by my side, no longer reaching out.

I want to look at you. Touch you.

But I don't.

I simply drop my face in the wind knowing it'll take my hair across my eyes

covering the tear that runs so fearfully down.

I am still strong inside.

Will I know you in a decade?

Stranger of my last decade.

Will we burn forever more like I know love does,

if I know then isn't it simply so?

I can’t take my eyes off of you.

Memory.

Don't look away. I think.

But I do. I always do.

I will love again. Someone else.

Or something quite like it. Whatever this is.

Inhale.

You'll always be the Heart Line in my palm.

Exhale.

I run the knife down it pushing hard to be sure.

Bleed me dry.

Drop.

Drop.

Drip.

Stain these memories.

I feel so free, but it's then when I fall.

I'm never free enough. When I'm home.

It's the last place I want to ever be, especially now.

Let me fall a million times more, stubbornly, defiantly, innocently,

Let me lead, innocently.

Follow me when I'm blinded.

Lead me, when I'm unsure.

Dance, always. Run with me. For the sake of it all.

This. Whatever this is. No body knows.

My blood speaks the truth of my past and the pain.

Cower within the vein of my unknown. Hide, as you do.

I don't want to see you, know you. Darkness.

I never asked for you.

Spill from me. Cover the floor through mistake,

just like I'm sure I was,

I'll live and be the better once you close over.

Bad seed. Die within me. Let me plant my own to bloom.

Arise. And I fall once again.

Close my eyes, and I'm floating through mistake.

I never know. Truly.

You are not for certain. And neither am I.

Beauty doesn't know itself when staring in the mirror.

Tie my up in your words. Whatever they even mean they make me feel better,

but they're always a word short. Let me go. To look back one day.

And know. Then,

That my soul is what shines. Not my reflection.

And that’s why I felt so ugly when I looked at it.

I am not you.

I am this. The words that are so free as they fly.

Free yourself. Through me.

Fly. Far. You will never fall through the clouds.

You trust me. You know me. Use me. Letters. Sentences.

I am your answers to your question.

Is it not when you write that you suddenly know? Yes.

Free yourself.

Love me.

I Love You.

Feel my story in your fingertips.

Are they not better than any pages you've ever turned?

Embrace the lonely in you.

The empty in the world, and the fulfilment in your very own breathe.

There is no other like you. No other. Look inside, and trust, and breathe, and cry

because I've always been here. And never left you. And I wont. Ever.

But you've left me. You've known me for so long but

then looked outside the window in wonder at the world.

You left.

I'm burning with unshed tears.

Hold me. Hold yourself.

Say Hello and step into the morning.

Disappear.

You don't need to say sorry.

You never do anyway.

And you still wont.

I miss you.

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Does any one else's cat like sleeping like this? 😂 #weirdo @1n5tadan

You are my sunshine ☀️

What post? O.o

wat?

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ninanotricci-blog

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