Dispatches from the Dustball

Dave Maass posts live from the Dustball 2000 Rally. July 27 - 29, 2011.

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Here is all the action from my Dustball 2000 experience packed into a short video set to "Motion Sickness" by New Mexico.

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Spinning doughnuts in a 2012 Ford Focus in Yosemite National Park with Team Zia Homies. 

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A touching moment between Team Jesus Christ and Team Kick Tiny Turboz Azz in San Francisco.

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Team Mach Speeed from Cortez, Colo. was one of the funders who came through and made sure I got to the Dustball with the right equipment to live blog. Here's my energy-drink toast to them and their toast to the California Highway Patrol

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Shot with an eight-second shutter speed in the fog on the Pacific Coast Highway. Top, Team Flying Squirrel. Bottom, Team Seibzehn. 

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I spent the second half of the day with Team Siebzehn or Seibzehn or Siebzhen...whatever. It's seventeen in German. Co-driver JP Gonzales is from Santa Fe and is partly responsible for introducing me to the Dustball in the first place. This rally, they're driving a Cadillac CTS-V. I shared the backseat with a giant Domo doll.

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Brace yourself: Here's Team Siebzehn from New Mexico, I mean Germany, in a Cadillac CTS-V gunning it out of the Gaviota rest stop. 

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I've been riding with Team Zia Homies for most of the day. I can't tell you much about them because they haven't said a word. They sit stoically in the Ford Focus, occasionally nodding at each other, throwing gang signs and breaking into dance. Sometimes they'll slam on the brakes, get out and post a fake road sign. I don't think there's anything under the coveralls except stuffing, springs, and a few Thug Life tattoos. 

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Team Tiny Turboz responds to the smack its El Paso rivals threw down this morning before the launch. 

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Team Zia Homies has its own choreographed dance routine. 

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A few photos from the launch this morning at the Queen Mary. Some of the teams (mostly the staff) were looking rough, but that's what happens. I'm riding with Team Zia Homies this morning. Photos forthcoming. 

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Team Kick Tiny Turboz Azz, as its name implies, is part of an internally competitive crew out of El Paso. Here they are in front of the Queen Mary talking smack before the launch.

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Smoking hot Rachel, smoking hot Rocio and half-witted Carlos (all according to Carlos) of Team Luna Performance #57 have the best (cough, bullshit) team origin story. I road with them last night for the last stretch from Quartzsite to Long Beach. Carlos is a border patrol agent and Rachel and Rocioare both court reporters. Major props to Rachel for being (I think) the only female team driver on the Dustball 

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Team Hazmatt, from Los Alamos, was last year's Dustball champion team, but this year they were a little slow on day one to find their way. I'll let them explain. 

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At the Flying J in Lordsburg, Team Radar Love talks about the helicopter that dogged Dustballers at the beginning of the rally. 

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Here are a few images from the launch this morning. With the spotty internet connection it took me an hour or more to get them online, so you'd better enjoy 'em. 

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Men love their cars, so much so that they can't help but relate to them in carnal similes. Here's Team Shake 'n Bake and Team Sweetness comparing their launch/lovemaking techniques.