“So it’s 6 PM in the night time… which is when I wake up.”
“Now I’m going to wake up my flatmates.”
“I really love living in a flatting situation.”
“I like to hang out with other vampires.”
“I like the company.”
“Awaken!”
“I transformed into a dog and had sex.”
“We’re gonna have a little flat meeting in the kitchen in about 15 minutes, okay?”
“You don’t have to come but I thought I’d extend an invitation to you just in case.”
“It’s a spinal column, yuck!”
“Maybe I should bring a broom down here for you, if you wanted to sweep up some of the skeletons.”
“I got you this chicken.”
“You’re a cool guy but you’re not pulling your weight in the flat.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that I’m cool.”
“You have not done the dishes for five years.”
“I’m so embarrassed when people come over here.”
“You bring them over to kill them!”
“_____’s like the rebellious young vampire.”
“He’s just like the young, bad boy of the group.”
“Now you are vampire.”
“I dragged man’s body down the hallway, and noticed that there was no dust. Like, I kind of… I kind of swept the hallway.”
“To be living this long and to have seen the things that he’s seen and still, like, kind of have it together, I mean, hats off to him.”
“My thing was, I would poke people with implements.”
“If you’re going to eat a victim on my nice clean couch, put down some newspaper on the floor, and some towels.”
“We’re not these mopey old creatures who live in castles.”
“One of the unfortunate things about not having a reflection is that you don’t know exactly what you look like.”
“We can give each other feedback and help each other out until we’re looking great.”
“When you are a vampire, you become very sexy.”
“I go for a look which I call ‘Dead But Delicious’.”
“We would like to come into the bar, please. Invite us into the bar, please.”
“You don’t know of a night dentist?”
“The deal is that he is going to give me eternal life.”
“It’s their last moment alive so why not make it a nice experience?”
“Um, I hit the main artery. So, yeah, it’s a real mess in there.”
“I think we drink virgin blood because it sounds cool.”
“I reckon the best thing about being a vampire is flying.”
“The neighbors can see you flying around the house.”
“I am doing an erotic dance for my friends.”
“It really, really sucks that I can’t eat him.”
“We’re just about to walk past some werewolves so some shit might go down.”
“We’re werewolves, not swearwolves.”
“He’s definitely my best mate, and I’m not gonna eat him.”
“Okay, I’m the main guy in Twilight. You know the main guy? Twilight? That’s me.”
“You can’t tell everyone that you’re a vampire.”
“I’m over being a vampire. It’s shit.”
“Our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident.”
“’Dearly departed…’. That’s us.”
“Vampires don’t like nuns.”
“You can’t go to the ball as Blade. He’s a vampire hunter.”
“You don’t look that great, but if you eat someone on the way…”
“Are you predeceased?”
“As soon as one vampire takes a bite, it’s a frenzy.”
“There should be no eating of the human.”
“Fuck off to a tree.”
“He’s probably still a little upset having seen his best friend disemboweled by werewolves.”
“I decided to bite her and we’re gonna be together forever.”
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