medice, cura te ipsum

eduardo "eddie" enriquez espinoza. 37. pediatrician. widower. werewolf. "Like a blind man fumbling, I now lock the door. My poor love, trapped in the empty house"

[ed-espinoza]

swearonstars·:

⋅𖥔⋅ ━━✶━━ ⋅𖥔⋅

Dilan’s lips curved up ever so slightly despite herself as Eddie took a step back, offering up a sign of peace that the vampire couldn’t help, but fine utterly amusing, even if she did try to hide it. “Can’t I, though? I don’t see the vending machine exactly trying to stop me,” She offered up with an eased shrug as she leaned her back against the side of the machine as she turned to face them. “And I’ve been in plenty of hostage situations too, Eduardo. Just because it is a lot more underwhelming, doesn’t mean it doesn’t fit under the definition,” She pointed out. Her eyes rolling over once more as the smallest of grins found its way to her lips. “First of all, it was a hypothetical question. Where’s your imagination? And secondly, you’ve probably got somewhat of a point there? But, then again, the sugar high always helped me somewhat null the cravings,” She explained away with another small shrug. “So… you planning on getting a granola bar yourself or?”

– .. .-

“Oh, so violence is a-okay if the victim doesn’t defend themselves?” Eddie teases, raising his brows overdramatically feigning shock. He is usually not this playful but with Dilan... well, he’s known her for forever, and his boyish side slips out around her. “Of course, Ms. Kaplan. Whatever you say.” His eyeroll matches hers as she tries to logic her way out of this. Eddie crosses his arms, holding the cane by its mid-section. “Unfortunately, I had to sell my imagination to put myself through med school.” He replies dryly. When it comes to other people’s struggle, Eddie is quick to draw a line-- their pain is theirs, and he doesn’t get to claim it as his as much as he is comfortable in his own misery. “While that makes sense... as a doctor I can’t exactly recommend chasing the sugar high. Even if I bribe my patients with candies all the time.” He says as he produces a red lollipop from his front pocket. He somehow always has one of these on his person. “I was gonna get a bag of chip or something before you were being all menacing.” He replies, “so what’s got you... well, low on blood sugar? Don’t you have banks and bars for that?”

[ed-espinoza]

glcsshousex·:··

꧁꧂

“Great,” he grumbled, pulling his jacket tighter around him as he stands under the sheltered doorway, readying himself to head out into the rain. His car was about 5 minutes walk away so the plan was to speed walk, get there quickly and maybe not look like a drowned rat by the time he did. There’s a small collision that makes him huff, arms flying out to ground himself, eyes squinting the rain away to see who it was. “Eddie,” small surprise. “Shit man, sorry, I was on a mission towards my car.” Jace apologises, only because he knew it was his fault. “What are you doing out in this? It’s pissing down if you hadn’t noticed,” he joked, pointing a thumb to the left where his car was. “I’ll give you a lift? I was gonna drive around till a food place sung to me so I don’t mind taking you wherever you’re going?” 

– .. .-

It takes a few seconds for Eddie to register the face. Perhaps it’s the rain, perhaps it’s because he has been avoiding seraphs altogether since Toni passed. “Jace,” he greets with the washed up defeat in his voice. “Nah, man, it’s alright. Not like I was watchin’ where I was going.” He puts a hand in front of the forehead to block out some rain and see more clearly. “Just tryna get back to the apartment before sundown... Full moon and everything.” He explains before nodding, “if it isn’t too much of a trouble, yeah, I’d appreciate it.” He may be depressed a lot of the time and enjoys good ol’ suffering, but he is not interested in walking in the rain. Eddie tries his best to keep up with Jace as much as he can. Once they get in the car, dripping wet, he lets out a rather long sigh and asks, “so, uh, it’s been a while. How have you been?”

[ed-espinoza]

dcrkpiictures·:

🐺

“Someone like me as in, an idiot who shouldn’t follow strangers into the woods.” Kyle let’s out a soft sigh as he raises the his glass to his mouth again and drinks some more of the liquid. Whatever he was drinking, it was rather nice. “But I really do, if you never found me, I’d probs be insane by now ye know but I really don’t plan to cause you any trouble.” A shudder at the mention of the full moon and his stomach began to knot. “I’m honestly really scared for that. Should I get myself some chains and that?”

– .. .-

Eddie makes a face that reads ‘you got me there’ but soon curls up his lips into a teasing smirk, “...that’s nothin’ a common sense can’t fix in my diagnosis” he chuckles, “beside, considering how some people in our pack can be, you’ll fit right in.” And he has the exclusive pleasure of cleaning after the mess they produce. He doesn’t mind it, to be honest. It’s a good distraction from his own shambles that he calls his life. “Nah, we’ve got other wolves and supernatural folks. Unless you were adamant about being alone, you’d have ended up here regardless” Eddie reassures as he tosses back the rest of his drink, before proceeding to pour himself another. “Unless you’ve got a basement or somewhere closed off, it’d be better to get away from people altogether. Some go campin’, some find locked rooms. For your first time, you might wanna be with other wolves. It can be... nasty.” 

[ed-espinoza]

swearonstars·:

⋅𖥔⋅ ━━✶━━ ⋅𖥔⋅

“I hate you,” Dilan mumbled out, resisting the urge to visibly pout knowing that Eddie was right… once again. “And? Is it not also bad form for the machine to hold my food hostage?” She pointed out with a huff as she tore open the bag of gummies and bite the head off one of the candies. The corners of her lips resisting the urge to tilt up into a small smile as her dear friend continued to tease her some more. “I do, but let me ask you something, Mr. Smart Alec, if you were a vampire and were actually going to eat food for a change would you spend it eating celery or on the good stuff?”

– .. .-

Eddie takes a step back, showing the palm of his free hand as the gesture of ‘I come in peace’. He just shrugs off her resentment. Such is the curse of being that guy. “It’s a bending machine, Dilan. You can’t hold them morally responsible for their faulty manufacturing.” He points out, deadpanning, “and I’ve been in an actual hostage situation. This is a lot more underwhelming in comparison.” Pursing his lips, Eddie just eyes the way she brutally executes the candies. “Well, first of all, I’m not a vampire so I can’t even pretend to relate,” he doesn’t even sugarcoat it. They are well past that kind of front. “Secondly, I actually don’t mind celeries. And I don’t think you can call that the good stuff...” But with that, trailing off as he attempts to measure how annoyed she might be for what he said, he relents and decides to give her a break. “But we can’t pick what we crave, huh.”

[ed-espinoza]

frccdxm·:·

Mylene was walking home, umbrella shielding her from the rain when she thought how thankful she was to have gotten one compact enough to always have in her bag. She wasn’t really paying attention, having just moved to Queens she was still trying to get familiar with the area, but then she felt herself bump into someone and gasped. “Oh god no that was totally my fault I am so sorry,” relief spreading through her as she saw he had saved himself from falling over. “Are you alright?” she asked with worry in her eyes, unsure if she made worse whatever he used a cane for. She stepped closer to share her rather large umbrella with him. 

– .. .-

“Nah, nah, it’s my fault. Kinda hard to see in this rain and I’m not exactly fast...” Eddie grumbles, rubbing the water away from his eyes. He just needs a moment to process the pain that shoots up from the leg to his waist. Must have stepped wrong when he stumbled. He closes his eyes shut and waits for it to pass as it always does. “...yeah, I’m as alright as I can be.” He replies, even though his tepid words are not exactly especially convincing. “Don’t worry about it. I’m already soaked... just need to get back to my apartment.” He does offer a weak smile for her kindness. 

[ed-espinoza]

burningchances·:·

— ✧·ﾟ

Nina knew what today was and living in a heavily populated werewolf area meant she was on high alert. It also meant she’d be preparing to spend the night locked in her apartment binge watching Netflix and downing her new bottle of wine. As she left the store with her needed supplies for the night she sighed at the rain coming down. Putting up her umbrella as she headed towards her apartment, colliding with someone and she reached out to help steady them. “It’s cool. Are you okay?” Putting her umbrella over slightly so it covered them both. “You look like you’re having a pretty shit day.” She remarked with no expression. “Forgot to bring an umbrella? Or watch the news for the weather?”

– .. .-

“Thanks,” Eddie sighs, wiping the water off of his brows even if it’s futile. “Oh, uh, it’s alright. I’m already soakin’ wet. Y’know, save yourself,” He says with a defeated chuckle as she puts him under her umbrella. While he appreciates the gesture, but it wouldn’t do him much good. “More like a shitty week, but yes, suppose it’s a shitter than the usual day.” He unfortunately doesn’t have any more energy to put up the façade of being okay. Perhaps it’s because she is a complete stranger. It’s easier to be honest, with less complication. “Don’t think that’s an either/or question, so let’s say both.” He shrugs before commenting at what looks like supplies for a staycation. “You look like you’re well-prepared.” 

[ed-espinoza]

DATE: August 22nd, 2021 TIME: 05:44 PM LOCATION: a random street in Queens 

Just when he thought this day could not get any worse, the sky decides that it is time to punish him. The downpour hits like a waterfall and Eddie, without an umbrella, stops for a moment and thinks to himself, this might as well happen. He already lost a patient today and his chronic leg pain is off the chart. Oh, and it’s a full moon. Getting dunked some rain on his head is simply a cherry on top. “...well, just fuck me, I guess.” He mutters to himself before trudging his way toward the apartment in utter defeat. At the corner, however, he bumps into someone and slips, stumbling. “Shit-- sorry, my bad,” he groans as he keeps his balance with the cane.

@darkesthourstarters​

[cantfightmoonlight]

@darkesthourstarters​

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“Oh for the love of-” Dilan cursed under her breath as she kicked the vending machine once more. Her eyes narrowing in on the sour patch kids dangling from a corner taunting her. The vampire had only wanted something to take the edge of the hunger itching at the back of her throat. But, instead she had wasted a dollar seventy five and for what? She was just about to full on shake the metal monstrosity in front of her when a hand reached around her, pressing the buttons one more time. Her eyes widening in a mix of surprise and annoyance when the snack she had been trying for the last five minutes to free fell safely out. “Oh… thanks,” She mumbled out, giving the other a small smile as she failed to hide the smallest hint of a pout.

[ed-espinoza]

– .. .-

Eddie’s ears perk up when he hears a blunt, metallic sound, followed by the familiar voice. Shaking his head, he heads toward the source of another kicking sound. He was tempted to just stand back and watch Dilan fight the vending machine... But his compulsion to be helpful wins. Instead of resorting to violence immediately, he just pushes the button from behind her. “Y’know it’s a bad form to exact revenge on machines for...” he trails off, bending down to pick up whatever snack she was craving “a sour patch kids.” He gives her a teasing smile before handing it over. “Y’know there are healthier snacks than this, right?”

[ed-espinoza]

dcrkpiictures·:·

🐺

“Am still in complete awe that they wid take someone like me. Ta, Eddie. A dunno how tae even repay yer kindness.”  The whole experience was mental to him. He was now in a pack. He had a sort of large family now cause of it yet he was still to experience his first shift. Their was a full moon coming up he was told but at least he was in a pack to help him with that. “Everyhing seems like it’s too good tae be true y’know.” Taking the drink from the other, he drank it down with the other. “I’ll be sure tae dae that mate.”

– .. .-

“Whaddya talking about, someone like you? You’re alright.” Eddie scoffs, not having any of the self-depreciating. Sure, he can’t say he understands the mentality of quite literally ‘following a stranger into a forest’, but Kyle seems like a good fellow. “Don’t sweat it. You don’t owe me anything. The pack doesn’t want lone wolves roaming our territory either, so. Just don’t get into too much trouble. That kinda puts me in a tricky position." He gives a nonchalant shrug. He would have done it for anyone else. Taking care of others, it’s just what he does-- even if it is mostly out of sense of duty. “Hey, don’t jinx it.” He jokes, “you’ve still got your first full moon to go through. And the first time is the worst.”

[quotemadness]

To say goodbye is to die a little.

Raymond Chandler (via quotemadness)

[ed-espinoza]

DATE: August 14th, 2021 TIME: 01:56 PM LOCATION: Wolf Den

“Well, I guess congratulation’s in order” says Eddie as he pours two glass of whiskey neat. The lunch/interview with the alpha went without a hitch, and Kyle is now officially in the pack. “Told you there’s nothing to worry ‘bout. Welcome to the family.” He says with the unusual, pleased smirk, tapping the other on the shoulder and handing the drink. The two big projects of this month are taken care of, two less things to worry about. Of course Eddie is in a good mood. “And you’ve got a new apartment-- Lys and Ryan are bit of wildcards but they are good people. Just don’t let 'em drag you around too much.” With that advice, he gulps down on the drink. “If need anything, just lemme know, yeah?”

@dcrkpiictures​

[ed-espinoza]

ryan-kennedy·:

lys-ash-rai·:

☿️

The fight breaks out when Lys is already 5 minutes late. Fights happen on the subway all the time so it’s not something Lys thinks much about until the cops show up. 5 minutes quickly turns to 15, easily going on 30. Lys looks down at their phone to see messages from Eddie asking why they’re late. For once, they’re genuinely apologetic. When they finally catch up to Ryan and Eddie they’re a whole 35 minutes late. “I’m here!” Lys calls out, running up to them, “Fuck, sorry I’m late. The subway was… a time. I texted Eddie about this, but basically there was a fight and the cops came and made it worse and it delayed the train so much. Honestly I should have just given up on it and run the whole way. Anyway. Can we still make it?” They pause to process what Ryan’s wearing, snort a little, and tousle her hair, “Look at you, little businessman.” 

-

“I’m sure they’ll make it here.” She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Yes Dad, I am wearing makeup. I needed to not look like I’m trying to move into an apartment we’re affectionately calling Himbo House if I want them to take me seriously.” After a bit Lys’s voice cut through the air and Ryan turned to see them running over. “It’s fine. I think we should be able to.” She looked over towards Eddie for confirmation. “Please don’t mess up my hair the one day it looks good.” She groaned. Her hands flew up to smooth it again. “Yes, yes, everyone is very entertained by my outfit I get it. Let’s just get on the road yeah? The sooner I scare the landlords with legal jargon, the sooner I can change into basketball shorts.”

– .. .-

Eddie glances at his phone reading the text from Lysander, and mutters “Somehow I doubt that...” He then shoots a quizzical, unamused look at the ‘dad’ comment. He should be used to it by now considering how many times he’s heard of that one. “A what house?” He repeats the last part for the sheer absurdity of that name. “Y’know what? I don’t need to know.” And when Lysander finally graces them with their arrival, Eddie is even less amused. “Well, at least you’re here now. Already notified them we are fashionably late.” He stresses the word fashionably with sarcasm dripping from each syllable. He gestures them to follow and leads them to a brick-walled building that doesn’t exactly look like an apartment. The ground floor from outside looks abandoned with its store spaces empty. Eddie goes up to the front door and buzzes them in. And then he heads straight to the staircase past the elevator with the ‘out of order’ sign. “Oh, boy. Here we go...” He sighs before start climbing the stairs.

The floors above the first house either small apartments or office spaces. On the fourth floor, a burly looking white guy in his 60s, with thick eyebrows, graying hair and arms covered in tattoos, greets them. “You must be Alex’s people. Here to see the apartment?” he says. Eddie, wheezing from half floor down behind the others, replies “yes-- sorry we’re late. You must be Dale.” He would shake hands but he needs a moment before he could go up there. “These are my... associates.” He keeps it vague on purpose for now.

Dale takes them to the fifth floor, which only has the elevator and the door. “So full disclosure, this whole floor used to be an office back in the day. After they went out of business, it’s been empty for a while. It got converted to a loft few years back when people got into industrial.” Dale explains as he unlocks the door. “But everything works, the gas, plumbing, electricity. Five rooms. No furniture. Oh, and you can use the rooftop. There’s a deck up there.” 

@lys-ash-rai·

[ed-espinoza]

xinthedarknessxx·:

Zane couldn’t help but chuckle faintly at the man’s response. Seemed like he wasn’t the only one who’d had a long week. He wasn’t sure if it was just the customers at the shop or the new load of work with the council he was feeling a bit more run down lately. He figured once he found a good rhythm with it all. “You can say that again. I swear the week is just never ending.” He smirks and shrugs faintly. “No offense taken, though I’d say we’re probably both on the same level. Looks like the week has taken it out of you? craziness at the office or just general stress?” 

– .. .-

Eddie breathes out a sigh like laughter. “More like a neverending month,” or a year, or longer, is the part he opts not to say to a stranger. The man looks already exhausted and doesn’t need to hear about his existential crisis. “Both, I’m afraid. I work with kids so so not a day goes without an incident and... well, life is just, y’know” he makes a vague gesture with the free hand. “What about you? Got your work-life balance?” He doesn’t bother to hide the disdain for that term in his tone. Everyone has their own center of gravity and it is difficult to measure what is the right balance. The way career magazines sells it is brimmed with bullshits, in his opinion.

[ryan-kennedy]

@ed-espinoza​

Looking professional was never Ryan’s favorite, but she was good at it. Appearances mattered when you wanted people to take you seriously in a legal profession. She smoothed out the jacket of her suit in the mirror and sighed. Her hair was carefully curled, and she’d even put on makeup. It looked good, but it never felt like her underneath it all. She grabbed her bag, one of the few nice things she owned, and headed out to meet Eddie. Honestly, she was hoping the place worked out. She’d done digging and nothing seemed to be particularly amiss. “Alright, Ryan Kennedy, legal representative, reporting for action!” She saluted the older wolf before dissolving into laughter. “I’m ready to read contracts and grill landlords.”

[ed-espinoza]

– .. .-

"Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first time,” Eddie grumbles into the phone, talking to his cousin Alex about the house they are seeing today. “Don’t worry, I’ve brought backup-- at least one of them showed up. Talk to you later.” He ends the call as Ryan shows up to the rendezvous point. He has never seen Ryan dressed up like this, but she can definitely pass as a lawyer. Surprisingly. “Well, I’ll be damned. You actually look professional. Are you wearing a makeup?” He lets out a soft chuckle. “Thanks for showing up in time. Lys is either fashionably late or MIA-- if they don’t show, we’ll just go see what’s wrong with this place ourselves.” 

[ed-espinoza]

liam-riedell·:

♥♥♥

Eyes catch the stall when it came to the other putting one of his legs into his pants, remembering now the slight limp and cane from the bar, which now leaned against the dresser. For a brief second, Liam begins to wonder what’d the man went through to end up like that. “Take it as you will…but yes, it was me paying compliments to your moves.”

“You don’t have to apologize.” It was the price to be paid, to feel all about a person’s life and what they’ve gone through. A part of Liam likes to believe it helps them in the end, at least for a little bit…enough to remind them they’re still breathing. “It helps me understand you a bit more, but don’t worry, I don’t go asking unnecessary question; what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom.” Loss was such a heavy weight to bare, he couldn’t figure out how people kept themselves from going under. At first he was unsure how to deal with it when he fed from those grieving, thankful that he had been too young to understand that burden after his mother’s passing. “But if it’s any condolences, Eddie, I’m sorry for your loss.” He’d leave it at that. The moment didn’t seem quite right to pour one’s heart out after having been a naked, tangled mess moments prior. “Not in the slightest.—You ever hear of succubi? Incubi? That’s me.” He begins, pulling his shirt back on. Now where did his damn socks go? “Your life energy keeps me alive and fed, and we get that through contact, but as you just experienced; sex is obviously the best route.”

– .. .-

Eddie chortles quietly, “thanks... You were, uh, great too.” It’s obvious that he is not exactly used to the one night stand or the talk afterward. It is not every day he hooks up with people. “I mean, grief is not exactly,” he pauses, struggling to choose the right word for it, “...desirable.” Loss is an inevitable part of human existence from the moment of their birth, but nobody wants to go through it. In fact, most people spend most of their lives trying to avoid it. “Appreciate it. Not exactly the appropriate thing to talk about after... this.” Eddie sighs before buttoning up his shirts. His fingers stop momentarily at the expression of condolence. He has never been sure of what to respond to the good old ‘sorry for your loss’. He could never bring himself to say ‘it’s okay’ (because it’s not) or ‘thank you’ (for what, acknowledging his loss?) So he often opts to the noncommittal “yeah...” with a curt nod, trailing off into the awkward silence. Really, there is a reason why he rarely talks about grief and loss. It doesn’t go well for anyone. Being a widower, it destroys your social life. And he is always eager to change the topic. “Erm, I’ve heard of the word. Can’t say I knew much about them as a... species.” He says, though considering that his entire family are werewolves and he knows plenty of other supernatural folks, the existence of succubi or incubi surprises him. “That’s fascinating, as physical contacts to get other’s life... energy as a means of sustenance.” He muses, trying to wrap his head around it as a doctor. “But, considering how I turn into a fur ball every month, not the strangest thing I’ve heard.”

[crumbier]

do you ever want to sleep for 14 years without waking up

[julienbakerfavormp3-deactivated]

Grief is a cruel kind of education. You learn how ungentle mourning can be, how full of anger. You learn how glib condolences can feel. You learn how much grief is about language, the failure of language and the grasping for language. Why are my sides so sore and achy? It’s from crying, I’m told. I did not know that we cry with our muscles. The pain is not surprising, but its physicality is: my tongue unbearably bitter, as though I ate a loathed meal and forgot to clean my teeth; on my chest, a heavy, awful weight; and inside my body, a sensation of eternal dissolving. My heart – my actual physical heart, nothing figurative here – is running away from me, has become its own separate thing, beating too fast, its rhythms at odds with mine. This is an affliction not merely of the spirit but of the body, of aches and lagging strength. Flesh, muscles, organs are all compromised. No physical position is comfortable. For weeks, my stomach is in turmoil, tense and tight with foreboding, the ever-present certainty that somebody else will die, that more will be lost.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Notes on Grief