🤡

relapsed july 2021 / 19 she/her

[moonlighthobi]

my brain makes me believe that i don't struggle with an ed just because i add milk in my coffee

[edthoughts]

i have to fulfill my duty of being gay and add oat milk

[moonlighthobi]

my brain makes me believe that i don't struggle with an ed just because i add milk in my coffee

[ifonlyiwasskinny5]

trying to find ed accounts active in july 2021, please like/repost so i can follow u!

[edthoughts]

i hate Christmas because my little monkey ed brain can't comprehend the amount of food that's in my house so I just eat all the time even when im full

[edthoughts]

sorry but i gotta vent😭 so i relapsed and started purging again after like 2 months of being clean. im doing it on a daily basis, but max 2 times a day (at my worst it was 4-5 times a day). back then i noticed some problems with the toilet in my house because i was putting huge volumes of vomit into it. it got better when i stopped but a few days ago our toilet got clogged. and i mean mad clogged. the worst part is i got a post from myproana forum stuck in my head, where a girl with bulimia was in a similar situation and the plumber straight up told her parents that it wasnt feces that clogged it, but huge amount of food-like waste. you can only imagine my anxiety at that point😭 my dad tried everything, used 2 packings of chemicals etc but it didnt help. we had to call 2 freaking plumbers to take the toilet off completely and clean the pipes. i was so nervous but it was just my freaking mum who accidentally dropped a detachable hairdryer part and flushed it😭😭😭 i almost died yall

[fatiequeen]

ANA’S GAME

Hejka Kochany Motylku 🦋

Chcesz spróbować zagrać z Aną? Zasady są proste 🙊 musisz zdobyć jak najwiecej punktów w ciągu całego dnia/tygodnia/miesiąca

1️⃣ bilans kaloryczny

0 kcal - 500 kcal 🍽 6 punktów

500 kcal - 1000 kcal 🍽 4 punkty

1000 kcal - 1500 kcal 🍽 2 punkty

> 1500 kcal 🍽 0 punktów

2️⃣ brzuszki

100 brzuszków 🎈 6 punktów

80 brzuszków 🎈 5 punktów

60 brzuszków 🎈 4 punkty

40 brzuszków 🎈 3 punkty

20 brzuszków 🎈 2 punkty

10 brzuszków 🎈 1 punkt

0 brzuszków 🎈 0 punktów

3️⃣ przysiady

30 przysiadów 🌸 6 punktów

25 przysiadów 🌸 5 punktów

20 przysiadów 🌸 4 punkty

15 przysiadów 🌸 3 punkty

10 przysiadów 🌸 2 punkty

5 przysiadów 🌸 1 punkt

0 przysiadów 🌸 0 punktów

4️⃣ spacer (minuty lub kilometry)

> 100 minut x 10 km 👣 6 punktów

80-100 minut x 8-10 km 👣 5 punktów

60-80 minut x 6-8 km 👣 4 punktów

40-60 minut x 4-6 km 👣 3 punkty

20-40 minut x 2-4 km 👣 2 punkty

10-20 minut x 1-2 km 👣 1 punkt

< 10 minut x 1 km 👣 0 punktów

5️⃣ nawodnienie

> 2 l 💦 6 punktów

1.5 l - 2 l 💦 4 punkty

1 l - 1.5 l 💦 2 punkty

< 1 l 💦 0 punktów

🆒 dodatkowe punkty

🌹 10 punktów

fast day

🌹 8 punktów

dodatkowe ćwiczenia

🌹 6 punktów

odmówienie komuś jedzenia, gdy nam proponuje

🌹 4 punkty

nawilżenie całego ciała balsamem (pomaga w zachowania jędrnej skóry)

🌹 2 punkty

dzień bez słodzyczy i fast foodów

[edthoughts]

hi sorry if i don't respond to some dms i dont really feel like talking to people in general rn and i use this acc just to vent (bc im too anxious someone would find my diary or something) i appreciate all the amazing people ive talked to on here and i love you but im really not ready to talk with anyone

so i think i relapsed, since quarantine started my ed kidna went away, i often had thoughts about how much i eat and i purged from time to time but i didnt restrict or anything. i definetly gained and im scared it's a lot. im definetly not back to my sw but im over 220 pounds for sure. im really fucking scared to weight myself so ill try to restrict for the next few weeks and then try to step on the scale. i already did a 24h fast a few days ago but i still overeat on daily. im slowly starting to eat less and less and monday im starting a proper restriction. im going to plan it over the weekend and buy some necessary low kcal foods. wish me luck maybe ill finally be skinny... or at least not fucking obese bruh

[edthoughts]

hi i finally relapsed lol

[edthoughts]

i installed tumblr and purged twice after 2 months of being clean so guess who relapsed

[edthoughts]

why did i feel my best when my bulimia was at it's worst

[edthoughts]

guys fuck this i think i want to recover. this shit ain't working and being skinny isnt worth being dead. id rather be fat and alive than live in constant fear that i fucked my heart up with purging so much that i will die. the left side of my body hurts and i dont want to die yall. im in this constant cycle of binging and starving and i aint losing no weight. someone teach me how to eat like a normal person

[edthoughts]

i got a summer job and im using it as an excuse to starve myself its going good so far

also i REALLY need to stop purging i almost died the other day

[edthoughts]

so its mental breakdown sunday anyone wanna join

[edthoughts]

i can't even be active on here im literally failing at everything i do

[edthoughts]

tmi

i learned not to trust your farts after taking lax the hard way

[edthoughts]

hi i just came here to vent a lilttle:(

i absolutely hate this magic time from around 11pm to 12am when my ed is asleep and i binge bc i keep telling myself "oh 12am is a new day ill start over". its so frustrating!! i need to stop that.

also i told u guys i bought a jumping rope yesterday and its actually pretty fun! after 20 minutes i feel like im going to vomit but i want to keep doing it every day and slowly raise the time to 25, 30mins etc. im making a little plan for the next week and i hope ill stick to it:( wish me luck and remember is yall want to text me i will glady talk with u!! u guys are probably tired of listening to my bullshit so ill happy listen to your thoughts

oh and one more little thought i had. i knew losing the weight you already lost but gained back is bittersweet but i didnt know its that hard... i have 5kgs more to go back to my lowest weight from december. i just want a normal bmi ffs....

[edthoughts]

i bought a jumping rope and after 20mins i feel like im dying thanks