My mom keeps forcing me to cook and if I don't, she thinks that I'm acting like a rich spoiled brat when I'm just not interested in cooking. My mom, keeps guilt-tripping me saying that I don't care about her and I'm not helping her but she doesn't mind if my brother sits idle. When I ask my mom why she is not asking my brother she just turns the arguments around saying I should stop comparing myself with my brother and that I'm using that as an excuse to not do work. How can I make her understand?
Oh damn, anon. That's quite a tough place to be in, i'm so sorry. Also sorry for answering so late, i've been a tad busy haha
So first things first, I'm a Desi kid, so I know how it is. Thankfully, I grew up in a house where gender roles aren't that strict, although my dad is pretty orthodox in his thinking.
I'm a rebellious person by nature, so my first instinct would be to oppose whatever is told to me. But I feel that diplomacy helps, esp. in Indian households, where emotional blackmailing and gaslighting is soooooo common. Just know, that your worth isn't determined by how well you manage the house or how well you cook and clean. Everyone, irrespective of gender, should know how to cook and clean and manage bills (something which is not taught in schools, but that's a whole 'nother topic).
As for your mom, it's easier said than done. What i've learnt is, if you say something inflammatory or even something that can be mildly construed as backanswering, it'll get you in trouble. Instead, do a tactic called, "Yea, sure. I'll do it in 10 minutes." Trust me, it works wonders. This way, you're defusing the situation, and also, most moms have ZERO patience, which means that they'll end up asking someone else to do it. :)
But on a more serious note, be honest with her. Tell her you don't like to cook. But also, learn basic stuff coz trust me that shit will help when you're alone in a flat on a Tuesday night.
Hope this helps! Take care, nonniee!!
