✶ ── 🎼 ❞₊˚ i write whatever comes to my mind!
✶ ── ⭐️❞₊˚ reqs are always open!
✶ ── 🎧❞₊˚ previously known as @/megumisgirl
i really like purple, apples and horror movies.
. 𝄞 ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ᭪ fandoms: jjk, horror stuff: i.e. hellraiser, conjuring, exorcist, the shining, hitchcock movies, mike flanegan shit and a lot more, k-on, the strokes, mlp, star wars, asoiaf, iwtv/vampire chronicles, twd, shadow and bone, aot, nana/yazawa mangas, dc (batfam/jason todd), marvel, skins, skam, saiki k, given, beck, evangelion, twin peaks, hellraiser, saw, creepypasta, bleach, death note, i also really like apples and whales.
before you follow: i support palestine, i support immigrants, i support congo, sudan, the people of iran, and oppose facisim. i support the abolishment of ice, i support abortion and women's rights, i support feminism and equality and equity for all, i support the death of capitalism, i support the rise of far left activists. i support education, i support the lgbtq+, i support love, care, empathy and humanity over all.
𖦹 like, comment or reblog to be mutuals!! i'd love to be friends <3
braindump on what kinda gf sofia would be!! lmk any of ur headcannons <3
Sofia loves it when you take care of her. she adores it when you're taking her heels off for her, wiping her makeup away after a long day or feeding her in bed when she's too exhausted to move. she loves being pampered after being in charge all day. she can only let her guard down so often, but with you it feels like all she does is let her guard down and ease up for a while. she'll be fast asleep after a long night, on your lap as you run your hands through her hair. she'll let you kiss her neck softly in the morning and smile as your lips met hers. she'll tell all her henchmen to leave the premise so she could have some alone time with her girlfriend and eat lunch without the worry of being killed. she loved the softness you brought to her world of knives and ropes and guns.
ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ྀི͚ㅤㅤ ┄ 𓈒ֵ۫ ❙❘❙ ͏ྀི
when it comes to safety for you, it's the top priority. but, she never leaves any of her henchmen with you, even the ones she trusts the most. she'll request you to stay by her side and when you say it's not necessary and you have your own life to live, suddenly it's not up to you anymore. you're by her side whether you like it or not. and most of the time, you do like it. since it means more time with Sofia.
ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ྀི͚ㅤㅤ ┄ 𓈒ֵ۫ ❙❘❙ ͏ྀི
Sofia rarely cares about what the public thinks. she has gone through every type of mud the media can drag her as. she has been called names that didn't exist, slurs that didn't apply to her yet one single mention of you and she is threatening the reporter to rewrite another article calling all of it false and slanderous. she holds the gun to the reporters head, lulling out praises that she knew you'd love to hear.
"Next write.." she paused, removing the gun from the reporter's head for a second, when the reporter moved she sighed and shoved the gun to the back of his head, "Why are you making this so difficult? I can't think!" the light of the computer illuminating the dark and dull room of the reporter, "Write about her generosity with the public, write how she volunteers and has done work with the Justice Department of Gotham for Foster Care."
the reporter sighs soundly, hands coming up to the keyboard and stopping, "But.. I don't know if that's true. I need to.."
"What you need to do is shut the fuck up and write." the gun pressed tighter and she leaned down right next to the reporter's ear, her eyes moved from the profile of the reporter's face and then to the screen where neatly written praises of her beloved stood, "Do you want your blood on that screen of yours? Hm? Or maybe some fuckass reporter will write about how you killed yourself because you were a shitty journalist who cared more about writing about innocent women than actual fucking things than matters." she whispered, her voice calm despite her words.
"I'll write it." and that he did. the tears that she predicted would be in your eyes were replaced with confused laughter of this silly article talking about how your work with the DOJ of Gotham has really improved and more funds should go in. surprisingly enough, just two days later, the reporter was unfortunately found dead in an overdosing accident. the article he had written before slandering you stood still, the writer did not. and that was justice enough for Sofia.
ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ྀི͚ㅤㅤ ┄ 𓈒ֵ۫ ❙❘❙ ͏ྀི
date nights with Sofia really defer. it would either be chill nights in where the two of you stayed at the manor and watched movies, drank light beers and fell asleep on the couch, or it would be all out. michelin star restaurant, wearing clothes that costed more than your rent, sitting by the window with a gorgeous view and sipping a Bourdeoux that tasted just right with the fillet in front of you. she was only so good with words, so expensive night outs were one of her many reassurances that she was still with you, that she still loved you.
ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ྀི͚ㅤㅤ ┄ 𓈒ֵ۫ ❙❘❙ ͏ྀི
sometimes reassurances do fall flat though. when someone had been betrayed the same amount of times Sofia has, they tend to get suspicious. she saw you talking to one of your colleagues with a smile too long and a touch too tender and it was an immediate flag in her eyes. the car ride was quiet from her end despite you asking what happened, but you knew what it was. she was shutting you out. Sofia did this far too many times, when things didn't go her way, she spiraled in her head till she hit rock bottom but you were not letting it get to that. the whole night you told her there was no one in this world but her who could make you feel the way you feel, it took over nine hours but she came back to you, and she made sure her feelings were known in the morning as she sweet talked her way through your thighs.
ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ㅤ۫ ⠀⠀✿֔ᮬ᳘ ׅ ྀི͚ㅤㅤ ┄ 𓈒ֵ۫ ❙❘❙ ͏ྀི
kind of short but i hope you guys liked it <3 i adore this woman
💭 alucard expresses the feelings and fears of abandonment so very well. despite his relationship with his father, alucard will always have a connection to him. he is the opposite of everything his father was: the light to the dark that plagued him. alucard’s dhampir identity, filial rupture amd exile produces, what i call, an existentialist creature. alucard’s being is being constituted by abandonment entirely, mother killed and father is morally and metaphysically caught between species. that structural a sense makes him an entity whose selfhood must be authored against the void.
that reminds me of this quote by Sartre that is, “Existence precedes essence.” abandonment (le néant) produces anguish and the need to choose oneself. alucard’s choice to oppose dracula is an act of self fashioning in response to abandonment. which brings me to lisa’s dying plea: “Do not hate the humanity that took my life.” her last words, her final exhortation motivates alucard’s choices.
i also see this as alucard’s existential dread. his abandonment becomes a perpetual threat, love risks loss, alliances risk betrayal, human risks attachment to his vampiric self. that yields a chronic fear of relational nullify that shapes his behaviour of melancholy. Heidegger’s throwness talks about being-toward-death, thrown into a world not of one’s making and anticipating loss. when alucard has seen and faced loss since birth, when he understands that loss is all there is to his nature, all he can do is wait for it. alucard’s aloofness maps onto the throwness and resolutes authenticity when he acts, i.e protecting humans despite being other. alucard’s words, constantly saying he does not want to become like his father is further proof.
but even after moral commitments, alucard’s fear returns as mistrust and withdrawal. his relationship with sypha and trevor are the proof of his oscillation between intimacy and self isolation which mimics between authenticity and bad faith self deception or the dialect of recognition frustrated by abandonment. (internalised exile/fear of harming others/losing others)
nietzschean perspectivalism and affirmations of overcoming confits what alucard should do: that he should affirm values against nihilism, combatting absurdity through continual revolt. abandonment both curses (persistent grief/fear) and liberates (allows autonomous ethical creation) alucard. his vampiric immortality intensifies the freedom that stretches across the weight of chosen commitments and terrors of endless loss.
he’s my baby :(( and a very fascinating character.
happy pride to everyone out there, all the people hiding their true selves for religion, all the people entrapped because of the place they were born in, and to all the people who were born with the misfortune of being different in this cruel world. pride, for this month is not a sin, but a month to be proud of who you are. and you absolutely should be. happy pride month to all <3
juneleb!!!!!!! some caleb birthday drabble cos i love him!!!!! happy birthday caleb, and happy pride month!!
nsfw warning below!
🍎⸝⸝.ᐟ Caleb usually hates to celebrate his birthday but he knows that you will have something planned anyway. you're his sweet and generous partner who never fails to make everyday special for him but today was his birthday! you had been planning this for a few weeks now. you knew that Caleb rarely wanted anything at all from you aside from just.. you: your presence, your undivided attention, your complete and utter focus on him. that's all he ever wanted and that's all you intended to give him and more.
the day starts off with Caleb being woken up by kisses to his cheek, soft whispers of happy birthday and begging him to wake up since you made breakfast in bed for him. eventually, he opens his eyes and sees how gorgeous you looked, dressed in his clothes and with a wide smile on your face. "Happy birthday, handsome." you whispered, kissing his cheek and his jaw before capturing his lips in a kiss that he reciprocated with a lazy hum, his hand coming to your back. "I made you breakfast."
"Without burning the kitchen?" he joked with a small smile on his face, pushing himself up so his back rested against the headboard. he watched you put the tray on his lap, "Looks great." he hummed, taking a bite of the pancakes that you made a smiley face with blueberries, "I'm so lucky to have you, baby." he took your hand in his, talking through a mouthful of food. "Eat with me." he said, bringing the fork full of pancakes to your mouth.
sweet words were exchanged and soon, sweet kisses as well. his lips were covered in maple syrup as you pushed yourself onto him, the tray now forgotten on your nightstand. Caleb laid lazily on his back, shirtless from last night and wearing nothing but a loose pair of sweatpants that already drove you mad. he smiled softly at you, the same smile someone has when they are overjoyed and oversatisfied from life itself, and that was Caleb at the moment. "You just relax, yeah?" you hummed, pulling your shirt over your head as his hands came to your waist, caressing you like you were a present set in front just for him. his present.
you kissed down his jaw and then to his neck, leaving soft pink marks down your wake that would fester into a beautiful red lovebite in a few hours. you leaned yourself down, kissing down his abs, hands roaming around his pecs and reaching his v-line before slowly kissing him back up. you reached his lips once again, kissing him with the same fervour he always kisses you with: like he was the luckiest man on earth, like he was all the time in this world, and now you do too.
Caleb wonders in between those precious kisses what happened in his previous life that made such an angel befell into his life. he felt you shift down onto his bulge, your shorts against his sweatpants and he groaned into your mouth. you rolled your hips, pulling away from the kiss with a huffed up laugh, your breath uneven. his lips were glossed with the mixture of your salivas, his pupils blown wide, he sighed softly, hips bucking up to meet yours in a desperate attempt to be closer to you.
you began to slowly push his sweatpants down before his dick springs free. he's red at the tip and shining with precum leaking down his veins, the curtains blown by the wind let the sun's rays hit him in the exact second, and he looks like someone completely out of this world. "I'm going to do everything for you today," you said, settling yourself in between his legs.
"Pips.. No, come on.." Caleb sighed, he hated it when you were the one favouring him for a change. he was always the one spending hours in between your legs but when it's his turn to be on the receiving end, he's embarrassed and uncharacteristically shy.
your hands wrapped around his dick and he let out a small whine just from your touch alone, "It's your day, Caleb." you murmured against his member, lips kissing the sides of them almost reverently, his hand came to rest on your head with a loud sigh, "Let me make you feel good." and you do. you make him feel like the luckiest person ever. his heart is fast and full with love. his whimpers fill the room as you lick around his length before taking him in your mouth. Caleb was a big man, but he never complained about you not taking him in fully or when your teeth grazed his tip, he took it all in. like the good birthday boy he is. "How does it feel, baby?"
"So good, pips.." he's groaning at this point, his hips jerking up to meet your mouth. at some point his hands come to either side of your head as he holds you in place, "Fuck.. So good.." and he thrust himself into your mouth. your hands go into his hips for support as he starts getting sloppy, his thrusts go slower and deeper and eventually, pearls of fluids leak down your throat and your chin. he groans as you pull away from him, his hair clinging to his forehead from sweat and sweatpants hanging from one leg.
"We still have much to do, y'know?" you hummed, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand before placing another kiss on his lips. "I sent you the itinerary a while ago. We have a whole day of Caleb things to do."
Caleb laughed softly, his cheeks flushed pink as he looks at you as you lay down on his chest. "And, what makes things.. Caleb things?" he asked, pushing back hair away from your face to look at you better. his eyes rake over the entirety of your face, reveling in the wonderful morning he just had.
"Things you like, things you might like." you grinned, resting your arms on his chest and your chin on top. moments like these were what made your days worth while. despite all the hardships that Caleb had gone through he remained your ever vigilant boyfriend, and you remained truly at his side. "Happy birthday, Caleb." you whispered, kissing his cheek once more, "I'm all yours today, and tomorrow, and everyday from then."
｡˚🫧🍎🐛˚ this is just some (corny) headcannons!! i'll write a more elaborate fic once his birthday banner drops!! happy juneleb and pride month, everyone <3
