Notes: Love a man in an ANBU uniform and I love fun team dynamics
Word Count: 2.082
Summary: Sakura, Kakashi, and Genma are pulled into Lord Ko’s idiotic scheme to get back at his ex, but they all get a little more than they bargained for. Not that anyone’s mad. Except maybe Genma.
“Tsunade-sama,” Sakura groaned, rubbing her temple. “You cannot be serious.”
“Sorry Sakura,” Tsunade replied, not seeming sorry at all. “Lord Ko asked specifically for a pretty kunoichi who could pretend to be his new girlfriend to make his ex jealous,” she responded brightly. “Wouldn’t you be offended if I had asked anyone else?”
“Ino. Hinata. Tenten.” Sakura listed, deadpan.
“Clan head, clean head, on a mission.” Tsunade responded.
Behind Sakura, two ANBU stood silently, watching the exchange between teacher and student with well concealed mirth.
“ Shishou,” Sakura whined, “don’t I have a reputation to uphold?”
“Ko is paying stupid amounts of money for this idiotic jealousy scheme. It's ridiculous. And he’s paying top dollar for the best escorts too, just to show his ex how important and powerful he is.” Tsunade smiled devilishly.
Sakura groaned and slumped in the chair in front of Tsunade’s desk.
“C’mon kid, think of it as a vacation. You get to sit pretty in some palace for a few days. Think of the food!” Tsunade exclaimed. Looking back at the two shinobi, still standing at attention, she said, “It’s a vacation for you guys too—easy peasy. Not that Sakura would need protecting anyways.”
Scowling, Sakura huffed, “How is parading around at a ball while I’m thrown around like an object, just so some idiot man can get back with his ex a vacation for me? ” Sakura said indignantly. “What if the crazy bitch decides to retaliate or something?”
Snorting, Genma broke his silence. “I’m pretty sure you could handle a civilian who’s never held a kunai.”
“Genma and Kakashi aren’t even the best,” Sakura complained, earning an indignant choke from Genma and a sniff from Kakashi. “Shouldn’t Shisui or Itachi be here?” Sakura leaned back in her chair, slowly accepting her fate.
“Wow,” Kakashi drawled, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Is that anyway to talk to your old teacher?”
Sakura snorted, “You barely taught and that was well over a decade ago.”
“Pft,” Tsunade shrugged. “This mission is something genin could honestly do. You and Hatake are there for the reputation. Doctor Haruno Sakura, Godaime’s apprentice, best med-nin across the Five Elemental Nations, co-director of the Konoha hospital, strongest shinobi on this planet—beautiful and intelligent,” she puffed her chest with each title. “And, uh, the Copy Nin,” she threw in, “are more than enough.”
“Hey!” Genma interjected, “What about me?”
“We just needed another ANBU guard.” Tsunade responded at the same time Kakashi said, “You’re just a pretty face.”
Folding his arms across his chest Genma pouted. “You can’t even see my face.”
Sighing once again, Sakura braced her elbows on the Hokage’s desk and cradled her forehead with her hands. “When do we leave?”
Tsunade handed Sakura a scroll. “Today.”
Slowly easing herself from the chair and throwing another exasperated glance at her mentor she wearily bowed.
“Sakura,” Tsunade started softly. Sakura peered up at her mentor through a curtain of pink hair. “Don’t forget to cover your Byakugo seal, ha!” Tsunade said, full of mirth.
Heaving out a breath and tiredly running a hand over her face, Sakura mock saluted her teacher and caught the scroll tossed her way.
“These have all the outfits, accessories, and makeup needed for the mission. Don’t ruin or lose anything—it was expensive as shit,” Tsunade warned.
“I didn’t realize the village had gowns in the vault for loan,” Sakura said wryly.
“I had them custom made for you,” Tsunade responded with a glint in her eye.
Opening her mouth in surprise Sakura squeaked, “What if I had rejected the mission?” her voice rising in consternation.
“Like you’d defy me, brat,” Tsunade with an eye roll.
Looking wearily over at Kakashi and Genma, Sakura said, “Meet me at the North gate at noon.”
.
Under the shadow of the North gate, Sakura hummed to herself as she double checked the contents of her pack and storage scrolls. She was looking forward to the mission. Despite her irritation in Hokage Tower, Sakura couldn’t remember the last time she was assigned to a mission that didn’t require her to be elbows deep in entrails or trekking through swamplands.
Plus, the company could be worse.
Light steps approached her. Two lithe forms in uniform, masks hanging at their hips, Sakura tried to fix her eyes on their faces.
“We’ll likely get to the palace around dinner time if we don’t rush. The ball is in three days and we can figure out security details when we meet with Ko,” Sakura said, securing her heaving pack on her back.
Kakashi and Genma exchanged nods and the trio started walking past the faded red of the village gate. Shoulder to shoulder, the spring breeze rustling through the Hashirama trees, the three of them could almost forget they were officially on a mission.
“For background,” Genma said, “I was on the security detail for Lord Ko a while back and he’s kind of a creep and kind of a loser.”
Kakashi chuckled behind his book and Sakura rolled her eyes.
“I figured if he had to pay women to be his date despite his status, he would be kind of a loser.” She tipped her face towards the sun and briefly closed her eyes. A vacation, a vacation, a vacation, she kept repeating. “I read the intel reports on him, my favorite was Anko’s. She basically just wrote ‘fucking loser’ over and over again on his personality section.”
Genma’s laughter carried through the forest and despite herself, Sakura laughed too.
“Behind closed doors, his own staff and advisors have been trying to get him out of power ever since his father passed,” Kakashi said, absentmindedly turning a page.
“A coup?” Sakura and Genma looked at Kakashi. Preventing political upheaval and getting information back to Konoha was a completely different mission than playing house.
Kakashi shrugged. “We’ve known this for years, his opposition won’t do anything rash. But the Lord is surprisingly politically savvy, he puts his foot down when necessary, loser or not.”
Wordlessly, they simultaneously leapt into the thick foliage of the forest and settled into a line formation with Genma at front and Kakashi in the back. Sakura considers this new intel.
“We likely don’t have to worry about any real political upheaval unless he proves entirely incompetent along with being an embarrassment,” Kakashi continued. “But just something to keep in mind.”
“How do you know this?” Sakura mentally cataloged the reports she read in Tsunade’s office, “I didn’t see any mention of this.”
All of a sudden, Sakura felt his breath at the nape of her neck. She fought the shiver that ran down her back.
“I do work, Sakura,” Kakashi whispered. He immediately fell back and Sakura felt a hot rush flood down her face to the pit of her stomach. She didn’t even hear him coming.
But looking back, that’s always how he operated. He’d never announce his presence, but she always saw him nearby. After slipping away from the village on confidential missions that even Tsunade wouldn’t disclose, she’d find him sitting in her office for his first post-mission check up in a year. After a hard week at the hospital, or a particularly grueling mission, he’d slide next to her at the bar and order their favorites.
Jokes under a whisper, the brush of a hand, the faintest outline of a smile, little peeks of what was under the mask.
.
I’m going to kill Tsunade, I’m going to kill Tsunade, I’m going to fucking kill Tsunade.
“I just know that we’re going to have such a great time, Sakura,” Lord Ko purred. His soft hands had imprisoned hers throughout lengthy introductions and while Sakura marveled at his scarless, uncalloused hand at first, she was ready to reduce it to a bloody stump.
She smiled and nodded as pleasantly as she could muster, trying to pull her hand back to her side. I’m going to kill everyone in this room.
“I’ve been following your work for quite some time,” he grinned, his wide face gleaming at her, not a pore in sight. He continued petting her captive hand while she felt a blood vessel pop in her eye. “I am quite the fan,” he crooned, leaning closer to her on the plush velvet cushion he insisted they share.
“I see, yes, thank you,” she said non committedly, and quickly glanced at the whispering courtiers to the side, hiding behind their fans, eyes pitying her.
“I can’t wait to see you in--”
“Let’s discuss the security details in private,” Kakashi interrupted, approaching the raised dais Ko and Sakura were seated on.
The hushed whispers in the room stopped immediately as Kakashi spoke. He and Genma had waited to the side, melting with the shadows of the columns. But as he stood in front of Sakura, it seemed unimaginable that he could ever be overlooked. He stood in stark contrast from the plush velvet rug underneath his boots, the rubies of the chandelier above him. All severe angles and brutal functionality. Genma slipped from the shadows and stood next to Kakashi, acknowledging Lord Ko with a curt nod.
There was an imperceptible twitch at the Lord’s brow as he assessed the masked pair below him and stared at Kakashi with an air of disingenuous affability. His smooth face broke out in a mild grin and he spread his arms wide--Sakura’s hand in tow.
“You’re ever so correct, ANBU, let the three of us discuss this in more privacy,” Ko said with a flourish of his robes. Surprisingly light on his feet for a large man, he quickly led Sakura down the steps of the dais, thick fabrics trailing behind him.
Without sparing Genma or Kakashi a glance, Ko brushed past the two while grasping Sakura by the hip.
Sakura reconsidered homicide.
.
The palace study, to Sakura’s slight dismay, was breathtaking. They sat at a great oak table, with chairs so wide they could fit two. The cushions were covered in an exquisite cream silk stitched in a pattern to resemble bound ropes. Lord Ko pulled Sakura’s chair for her and the heavy wood slid back on a plush green rug. He sat at the head of the table, facing a stained glass window that made up an entire wall depicting a dragon in flight through the sea.
Ko rang a bell he procured from one of his deep sleeves and servants filtered through the room and set up tea, water, and some documents. He leaned as far as he could towards Sakura, large belly heaving over his armrest, and Sakura scooted as far away as possible, thankful for the lavish chair. He poured her tea himself, allowing his servants to serve himself, Genma, and Kakashi on delicate porcelain plates.
Looking across the table, Sakura stifled a smile, watching Kakashi daintily sip from the white and gold teacup in full ANBU uniform.
“Lord Ko,” Genma said to Sakura’s left, “we’ll need floor plans of the palace, and the proceedings for the ball to best assess security measures.”
Genma, Sakura forgot, was a professional at the end of the day.
“Ah yes, the blueprints,” Ko said airily, “not sure where that would be, you both,” he pointed to Genma and Kakashi with his teacup, “are free to walk around the premises and draw a map.”
Sakura’s brows shot up, and she could sense Genma fighting the urge to lunge at Ko’s neck. The Lord pulled a fan from an inner pocket of his robe and fanned himself as he turned his whole body to Sakura.
“Sakura--”
“Do you have any enemies we should be aware of?” Kakashi interrupted.
Lord Ko continued fanning himself, rings glinting on his thick fingers. “Dig around in the files the servants brought, there’s bound to be some information in there,” he said, never turning his gaze from Sakura.
Sakura grabbed as many papers as she could and started examining them quickly, anything to distract herself from Lord Ko’s roaming eyes.
“If all the information is in these documents, we’ll reconvene tomorrow afternoon to discuss,” Genma stated, shuffling folders together and standing up.
Sakura made a mental note to profess her undying love to Genma as soon as she had the chance. As Sakura made moves to leave, Ko grabbed her armchair and pouted. “We didn’t discuss the ball yet or what the dress code is,” he said desperately, searching her eyes.
“That information isn’t in these files?” she asked weakly, hope seeping out her body.
Listen. It began as a joke and will end as one as well. They've never met, but that's the beauty of shipping, if we're talking about similarities, they're both dead, popular and have a lot of untapped potential.
Rating + Notes: Crack/Fluff, ur classic unmasking trope
Word Count: 769
Summary: A mouth breather. That was the reason behind one of Konoha's greatest mysteries.
"Sakura," Kakashi abruptly called from his place on the couch.
She pulled her feet from his lap and slowly pushed herself upright, noting the rigidity of his shoulders, Anbu tattoo rippling. "Kakashi?" she responded tentatively. She wasn’t sure if this was finally the breaking point. Defining whatever this was or wasn’t, if he was ready to break their little rituals clumsily as he stumbled into it.
"I’m ready," he said resolutely, tight fists on his knees.
"Wait,” her brow creased, “ready for what--"
His pointer finger slid to the hem of his mask and her eyes widened in shock before slipping into feigned neutrality. Kakashi’s chest rose with a quick inhale as he hooked his index finger under the black fabric.
"You don't have to if you don’t want to!" Sakura rushed, but she really hoped he would.
"No, I-I want to," he bit out.
At his obvious strain, she placed a hand at his knee, but he tugged his mask down in one quick motion. If she left five bruises in the shape of her fingerprints around his knee cap, she swore it was an accident.
"Wow," she breathed. She approached the situation as she did for the first few months of their budding relationship. Treating him like a feral cat--a cat prone to making quick exits out of windows and never showing up again.
"You," she paused tracing his face with her eyes, half wishing she had let Sasuke bleed to death in the Valley of the End to have stolen one of his eyes for herself to burn this moment into her retinas.
Kakashi held still as she forced him to meet her gaze.
"You,” she paused, squeezing his leg reassuringly, “are very handsome."
He tried to fight the flush that rose on his cheeks and averted his eyes, lip twitching at the corner.
Sakura continued, “Thanks for show--"
"--it's a Hatake thing," he rushed out.
Sakura tried to tamp the sharp pang of panic from the uncharacteristic show of vulnerability.
"You don't have to share anything you don't want to," she reminded him quickly.
"No, no I know,” he shook his head, “I-I want to, I’ve wanted to for a while now but just," he ran a gloved hand through his coarse hair, "couldn't." He offered a half smile and drew out a long breath.
"It's a Hatake thing,” he said resolutely. “It's skipped through generations but it's pretty common,” he explained. “My grandmother passed it to my mother and she passed it to me is what I was told." he said, looking at the space next to her ear.
Sakura recalled the thin scroll she found in the Hokage’s library describing the Hatake clan. A nomadic clan that eventually settled towards the mountains of Konoha, but the information about his mother’s side was redacted.
"It's been quite..." he looked up at her briefly before trailing off and she was really hoping for a medical anomaly-- elongated incisors, retractable fangs, claws. “Troublesome to say the least but, I’ve lived with it this long."
He lifted his jaw to her and she swore he was going to unhinge his jaw like a snake. She wondered if he’d let her conduct tests. He lifted a finger to the tip of his nose--super scent? Fuck, she just came back from the gym, she wondered if--
"Deviated septum."
She tried not to scream.
"It made it hard to breathe, so I was always eating bugs while traveling through trees," he admitted.
Sakura felt a vein pulsate at her brow and she counted her inhales and exhales to ensure they were even--experiments ruined. A mouth breather. That was the reason behind one of Konoha's greatest mysteries.
"I’m very sorry," she stated, slipping into professionalism. "If you'd like, it's a relatively simple surgery." She began describing the procedure, the aftercare and recovery time, slowly relaxing herself with the familiar routine.
Kakashi nodded and smiled shyly at her--damn she thought, no crazy incisors.
"I’d appreciate that," he said sheepishly. Sliding his mask over his handsome, albeit, medically normal features Sakura noted with disdain.
He rubbed the back of his head. "I’ll let you do the surgery, but I’d prefer if no one else could my face," he trailed off in thought. "But if you could just do it in your apartment and I can rest and hide here--"
He fell back onto the couch, Hyuga chakra point beginning to welt at his neck, and Sakura tamped down her killing intent.
She narrowed her eyes at the passed out jounin. Well, she rolled up her sleeves. Local anesthesias overrated.
