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April 7th, 2011. Day 97.

IT'S MY BIRTHDAAAAAAY. YAAAAAYUH YAAAAAY! Haha.

Hmm. Today was amazing. First Katie Fischer & Luisa Defalco took me out to Lunch at this amazing Chinese Food Place. We were joined by Deflacs brother, who is HILARIOUS. Haha. After that, Katie took me to T Mobile where we met my mom and I got a new phone. Talk about perfect timing. My other phone was dying ALL day. smh. After that, I went to practice & had a chill time. We got out earlier than usual, which was awesome. I chilled for a while and then Princess Christine, Dom, Sarah, & Aliza took me out for Dinner at Bahama Breeze. Hmm, it wasn't allll that great but i had A BLAST. This was one of the best birthdays I've had in a while. & i love my bestfriends and Family.

OH BTW, I got a TIRAMISU BIRTHDAY CAKE, fucking awesome.

April 6th, 2011. Day 96.

My birthday shoes, a gift from ME to ME. These are soooo cute. Tomorrow, I'm going to look fucking fabulous. Please believe it.

"& all those girls niggas that played me, eat your muthafuckin heart out."

#project 365.#gifts.

April 5th, 2011. Day 95.

At this point, I don't know what the fuck is going on. FUCK EVERYTHING. Ugh. I'm so confused. ):

#project 365.#confused.

April 4th, 2011. Day 94.

My box full of useless shit that has no value to me anymore. Well, everything but the movie gift card. That shit is worth 25 dollars. lmao. Anyways, this break-up between James and I is fucking horrible. I have never felt so jealous and bitter in my life. I wish these feelings would go away. Good luck with that.

#project 365.#ex-boyfriend.#random.

April 3rd, 2011. Day 93

This is my "uhhhhhhh" face. It's Sunday and I'm over this whole week. Whatever.

#project 365.#random.

April 2nd, 2011.

The pizza I bought for a FAILED sleepover. Only 3 people came. Nice to know my softball team loves me. hmph. WHORES.

#project 365.#softball.#sleepover.

April 1st, 2011. Day 91.

This Nigga. Lmao. So This WHOLE time he's been flirting with me has been a complete joke. He made it seem like I was trying to cuff him or something. All I did was ask the nigga if he was DTH or not. Does He reallllly think I would "fall in love with him" in 2 months? LMFAO. Someone needs to get over themselves. For Real. Hmmmm, oh welll. ON TO THE NEXT. (:

#project 365.#silly boys.

March 31st, 2011. Day 90.

I am tired of the false promises of my team. I'm tired of all of the things WE say we're gonna do, but don't.

Whenever I offer words of inspiration, people hear me but they don't HEAR ME. I'm tired of the same way we play, the story excuse for softball. I want us to do BETTER damn it and I know we can. I just don't know when EVERYONE is going to decide to do it.

#project 365 #softball.

March 30st, 2011. Day 89.

Today I received an invite from Nick MAGS to join their secret prom group.

All I can say is...I'M EXCITED FOR PROM. Straight up.

The houses that we're looking at are AMAZING & let's just say I'm gonna "let loose" on Prom night. That's for sure.

These people take their dances VERY SERIOUSLY.

#project 365.#PROM 11.

March 29th, 2011. Day 88.

Well today was a GOOD GAME for me personally, but I can not say the same for my team. I got a hit off of the second best pitcher in our league, so I'm not mad.

However, I am FURIOUS that my team keeps letting this happen.

I JUST WANT TO WIN. seriously.

#project 365.#softball.

March 27th, 2011. Day 86.

"I see you drivin' round town w/ the girl i love & i'm like FUCK YOU. ooh ooh ohh."

Okay, first of all, this is a vent post, so it's going to be very long.

Okay. How the fuck can someone tell you they're going to be there for you and your "best friend" and "want to stay close" yet treat you like fucking shit? If this is how you treat your "best friends" I would REALLY hate to see how you treat your associates. Wow.

Another thing, could you NOT get on facebook and act like us breaking up was the best thing to ever fucking happen to you because I did NOTHING wrong to your dumbass yet you're acting like our break-up was a fucking gift from God.

You're such a douche. I hate that bitch that lives in Florida and thinks that she can just like a;; your fucking statuses and it makes a damn difference.

WHAT EVERYONE NEEDS TO REALIZE is that I FUCKING HELD YOU DOWN FOR 2 FUCKING YEARS. 2 YEARS OF MY YOUNG ADULT LIFE WERE WITH YOU. How the fuck do you get over 2 years in 2 fucking weeks? I really feel like everything you say was a fucking lie and I can't believe you are acting like this.

I loved you, I STILL FUCKING LOVE YOU, but none of that matters to you, huh? All that matters to you is that you "feel single" and "Old days are over, new days are coming", whatever the fuck that even means.

FUCK YOU. FUCK ALL THE FUCKING MONEY I WASTED ON YOU, FUCK EVERY DAY I EVER SPENT WITH YOU, FUCK ALL THE FEELINGS I STILL HAVE FOR YOU EVEN THOUGH YOUR FEELINGS ARE CLEARLY NOT THE SAME AS MINE. JUST FUCK EVERYTHING.

Thank you so much for proving me WRONG when I said that "you were different" because guess what? YOU'RE NOT.

You may not have cheated on you, but you're still doing me fucking grimey like every other guy I've ever fucked with so FUCK YOU.

#project 365.#ex-boyfriend.#James.

March 28th, 2011. Day 87.

It seems that whenever I vent in my AP English class, someone finds it necessary to tell James. Haha. Okay, whatever.

I guess he wants me to just talk to him whenever I have a problem but HOW the fuck do I talk to him when he acts like he doesn't even care. Man, fuck it all.

I'm so sick of DEL SOL & the sketchiness of people.

#school.#project 365.#James.#ex-boyfriend.

March 26th, 2011. Day 85.

Today was a busy day. Well not really, but kinda.

For softball we had our 2nd annual hit-a-thon and it made me feel stupid as fuck.

Afterwards, we went to Cici's pizza for some good ol' fashioned team bonding. That was fun.

I am going to miss softball SO MUCH once it's over. I hate thinking about it, so I'm going to stop now.

#project 365.#softball.#friends.

March 25th, 2011. Day 84.

I don't understand how we could have been winning against Foothill, tie with them, and then end up losing by 7.

Our team needs to get their shit together man.

I can't keep doing this.

In other news, MLD is possibly DTH. I'll have to investigate the matter further next week. I do know that he tried to sit next to me on the bus from Foothill and we texted for 2 hours. Haha, we will see. (:

#softball.#boys.#project 365.

March 24th, 2011. Day 83.

This is a picture of what my facebook fortune cookie was today. Now, I'm pretty sure 3834758435 people have gotten the SAME fortune, but this rang true to me.

Throughout the latter of our relationship, I did WHATEVER James needed/wanted, yet it always felt like he didn't appreciate it.

Forget James, I feel like that is how it works for almost EVERYONE I do something for.

I'm unappreciated. So from this day forward, I will not waste my kindness on people who can't appreciate it.

#project 365.#life.#Quotes.

March 23rd, 2011. Day 82.

I am tired of these ridiculous ass softball scores. Our team needs to get it to-fucking-gether. Seriously.

This includes me. While my defense is awesome, my offense is terrible.

Starting this weekend, I'm going to the batting cages twice a week, every week.

I'm tired of SUCKISH. Simply tired of it.

#project 365.#softball.

March 22nd, 2011. Day 81.

Damn, I hate how everything in my house reminds me of James. It doesn't help that I have pictures of him on my wall either.

However much sadness I get from remembering the good times, I can NEVER delete the text messages or remove the pictures.

I wish I WAS the one who wanted it to be done, rather than the one who had no idea.

#project 365.#memories.#ex-boyfriend.#James.

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