Elodie Bay Underhill // 23 attempted poet // actual waitress born in tehachapi, CA
and if you don't know where that is
neither does anyone else bisexual // in a serious relationship
with netflix, hazelnut m&ms, a pair of rollerskates, and my grumpy cat
All work and no play makes Ely a dull and sleepy thing. Anything going on around these parts worth checking out? A girl can’t subsist on wine and Animal Crossing alone.
Tried to meet up with my Scruff date until I found out that he was in Staten Island. Like you expect me to take a ferry to hook up? Honestly, the nerve to pull that shit when I can find perfectly acceptable lay in Manhattan. @pretendingstarters
Scruff is... a dating app, yes? There are so many of those these day. I can’t keep up with them. Tinder, Hinge, Bumble... and they all have the dumbest names.
Sometimes, self-care is going to the gym or taking the dog for a walk. Sometimes, it’s watching Les Mis at 6am before the rest of the household is awake. You do you. Carpe diem.
@pretendingstarters
Self-care for me involves rollerskating. Or Netflix. I watch way too much true crime. But I will set aside the Netflix for Les Mis. If you’re not doing a terrible attempt at singing both parts of The Confrontation while in the shower, what are you doing with your life?
So I have been here a year and just started walking and finding little gems or what not and I went to this bakery that served something called a cronut. Now I love me some sweet and all but this just seemed a little weird to me. Though I tried it I didn’t have high expectations but boy was I surprised it was really good. So now I am looking for more gems around town that have delicious foods I never tired; Any suggestions?
@pretendingstarters
Cronuts are so much better than I thought they’d be! I just expect things that get a bunch of hype attached to them to only be okay, so I was really surprised. Um... there’s this place in Chinatown that does these pastrami dumplings that are super good. Also, there’s a place in Queens that does soup dumplings, and one of the specialties is the chocolate dumpling. Delicious stuff.
Does anyone have experience with child proof fridge locks? Like, do they actually work? This was the third night in a row that Freddie managed to open the fridge to steal my leftovers, so I woke up to a total mess.
Oh, Freddie is my cat, by the way. Probably should’ve mentioned that sooner…
@pretendingstarters
Would it be terrible to say that they totally work on Artemis, but she’s not the brightest cat? I know she can’t hear me or anything, but I feel like a jerk anyway. Like she won’t know I said something mean, but I will.
Point is... the locks are great. If your cat is kind of dumb.
That feeling when a drunk asshole decides to ruin everyone’s night by smashing a beer bottle against some other dude’s head… Sometimes I just wanna go full JWoww while at work - If you wanna stay and get your ass beat, you can stay and get your ass beat. You wanna stay and get your ass beat, you can get your fucking ass beat. But alas I’ll keep smiling since the show must go on. Whatever, at least I swindled an extra $100 from him before he got carried out in cuffs. How’s your night been?
@pretendingstarters
I wish I had that in me. When someone spills their food on me or turns into a sloppy mess or starts a fight in the middle of the cafe (...during brunch too. Who does that? Who starts a fight at brunch?), I have to bring someone else in. I just can’t handle the rudeness. But there were no fights today. Just the usual tips, the usual behavior. No extra hundred bucks... Congrats.
“so, serious question i’ve had since i first moved out here that i’m trusting you’ll help me out with.” he smiles for a moment, the question partly a joke in a way, with how much he’s asked his own roommate the same thing. it falls a little though, a shoulder shrug following. “is there a reason everything out here is so expensive, other than like, trying to not get people to move out here? because i swear to god, i think i haven’t paid so much money for hot dogs anywhere other than here.”
@pretendingstarters
“Trusting me? You sure that’s a good idea?” It was hard not to smile in Finn’s presence. Whenever she spotted him behind the bar, she knew her night would go alright. Having a friend at work was almost novel, but she liked how it felt. “I’ve heard it’s the water. Which doesn’t make sense. I don’t know. Is it because they know we’re all suckers?”
“i might have lived in the city my whole life, but there is one thing i will never get used to. the weather.” rachel leaned towards the person by her side and gave them an apologetic smile as she fixed her coat. “you never know what to expect! are you going to end all squeezed up in the subway because it’s raining or will you freeze to death when it starts snowing?” she had nothing to complain about, considering she would most likely ask to use the private limo of the theater, but, she was at least trying to be relatable. “i’m sorry about that, i think i woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
tagging: @pretendingstarters
“Reminds me of my dad’s place in Tehachapi. The name literally means, ‘land of four seasons,’ or something like that.” Ely tugged her own coat closed, holding it around her, snug against her body. “I think I’m always a little cold though. Maybe my body just runs that way, but I feel like I always need something.” Glancing over at the girl beside her, Elodie couldn’t imagine why she’d be unhappy. But then, Ely did assume other people were living their best lives. “Wrong side of the bed?”
☆ did you hear the rumor? ELODIE UNDERHILL has been spotted in the big apple! SHE is 23 y-o and works as a WAITRESS & POET. some things never change, because SHE is still APPROACHABLE but also INTROVERTED. psst! we did our research and found out that SHE left home at 17 to join a spiritual cult. i wonder how long ELY will play pretend! ☆ {ella purnell, OC}.
SECRET: At the age of 17, Elodie followed a pretty girl in a flower crown away from her father’s home and off-the-grid, settling with a spiritual cult at a compound in the middle of the US. Their charismatic leader claimed to have had visions, and Ely was eager to believe. He’d seen a great settlement, a new Arkteia. Arkteia was a settlement where ancient Greeks had worshiped the goddess Artemis as members of the cult of Brauron. This worship felt wonderful at first, to be a part of a group of people like herself, young and eager to change their destinies. But after three years and many stories Ely still doesn’t know how to tell, she fled the compound, finding herself in New York, and decided to try and find her destiny there.
HEADCANONS:
Born in Los Angeles to parents who loved her dearly. They moved her to the mountain town of Tehachapi, where they lived just on the outskirts. She was always a happy kid. She didn’t have a lot of friends, but she made up for that with an incredible imagination.
Her mother passed away suddenly when she was 14, an event that changed everything about her home life. Her father became distant, and Ely suffered from selective mutism. He took her out of school, and she began to learn on her own at home. She and her father would go days without seeing each other or any other person.
At 16, Elodie found herself yearning for some company, and she started to hang out with the few friends she’d had when she was younger. They’d changed a lot, becoming very different people from the kids she’d known before. With them, she went to parties, had her first drink. She kissed her first boy... and then, her first girl.
Ely ended up in New York, because her mother had been born there. She hadn’t seen her father since she ran away. If she had any sign that he’d been looking for her, she’d get in touch, but there’d been nothing. She’d searched for her name on the internet, and there was nothing there. But New York made her feel a connection to her mother, and that made her a little less lonely.
She ended up as a waitress by accident, being pulled off the street by a restaurant owner whose staff just hadn’t shown up. She was waiting tables five minutes later and hasn’t stopped since. She’s worked at eight different places since arriving in the city, often two at a time. She’s currently working at a little breakfast cafe by day, and taking shifts at a gastropub in the evenings.
Poetry is something she’d always loved. She isn’t sure whether her work is any good, but she keeps trying to write something that she feels a connection to, something that really conveys who she is and what she feels. She has submitted some of her work to anthologies and for contests, and she has been published once or twice.
She shares her apartment with a cat named Persephone and a roommate she never sees. He’s generally locked up in his room, keeping to himself. Which isn’t to say that they aren’t friends, but they both like their space. It’s the perfect arrangement so far.
When it comes to sex, Ely’s always a little bit terrified. Artemis represented purity in Greek mythology, and the concept of virginity became very confusing when she was still with the cult. She is still working to unlearn the more negative things she took away from that experience, but it’s difficult to remind herself that sex is healthy sometimes.
So I’m sitting here watching Avengers because there isn’t anything better to do since I’m the only one up. I’m at the Hulk scene and all I see is everyone running away and the police officers running towards the danger. They looked so scared but it’s their job and they have to protect their city. Gotta say that I have a new found respect for law enforcement, but that is also a job I will be crossing off my list.
That’s definitely the job. It’s not that you’re unafraid. It’s that you run at the trouble even if you are scared, but then, that’s bravery in any situation. I bet you’ve done your fair share of running at things that scared you.
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