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@embcldens
· ☼ @morganstm ! ››
Go ahead and watch me! Because all you’re gonna see is a good fucking person trying to do the right fucking thing all the time! And maybe I shouldn’t, maybe that’s where I go wrong, but I can’t help myself because it’s in my stupid fucking nature!
𝙏𝙊𝙋 𝙁𝙄𝙑𝙀 𝙎𝙊𝙉𝙂𝙎 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙄𝙉𝙎𝙋𝙄𝙍𝙀𝘿 𝙁𝙄𝙉𝙇𝙀𝙔 𝘽𝘼𝙐𝙀𝙍 𝘢 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘴
people whose first instinct is to smile when they make eye contact with you are some of earth’s treasures and need to be protected
☼ 𝐑 𝐈 𝐕 𝐄 𝐑 . ››
❛ 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡 , 𝐢’𝐦 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 nature girl ones are a hit . you’ll have your own show on animal planet in no time , i reckon . ❜ river’s face is practically sore at this point from how hard he’s forcing himself to not break out into a massive toothy grin , forever trying to hold onto the reserved curl of his lips as to not lose his cool — but boy , does finley make it hard . ❛ getting up there , ah okay . i’ll have to put up a poster of some precious sea turtle or something , earn more points by you . i’m sure that plus me smilin’ more or something would earn me the last few points , easy . ❜ he quips back with a sparkle in his eye ; it’s perhaps shameful the amount river’s remembered about finley’s likes and interests over the years , especially after being first to claim he doesn’t think anything of their time spent together . ❛ miss bauer , controlling herself ? sparing me details ? your momma must have let the wrong girl into the house , i gotta make sure she knows you’ve been replaced by an imposter , ❜ he gasps , though a naturally monotonous affect makes it read as much less dramatic than finley’s teases . he plucks two plastic spoons from a box on the countertop , sending a silent prayer she won’t lament their use of single - use plastic before offering one to her . ❛ you don’t have to be the grad to deserve a little token . i’d say you being here is reason enough to celebrate . disappointed you wouldn’t agree , ❜ he tells her , disposition gentler this time , a sincerity that all but threatens to expose river’s unspoken sentiments there and then . it was incredible, really , the way he can lie to himself so calmly ; mentally repeating to himself the mantra of take it easy , it’s just her as if it’s his lifeline . but that’s the issue for river — finley , just as she is , is enough to overwhelm river for all the right reasons . he plucks the leftovers from the microwave as the timer drops to zero , taking up the seat next to the ebullient blonde with a stifled laugh at her unhinged rambles . ❛ i appreciate the flattery but me and my substantial mass taking up all your room would probably make the worst gift possible . i’m about as interesting as a rock garden — and even you’d find a way to make that shit exciting . ❜ he offers the container in her direction , indicating for her to take the first bite before playfully pointing his own spoon at her , tone forewarning in the ever most gentle way . ❛ now that i have permission though , i’ll be prepping my graduation gift well in advanced . you’re warned . ❜ he says it as a joke , but there’s unspoken truth to his words ; if anything , river’s overthought every exchange he’s ever had with the younger bauer . too much , too little ? too friendly , too formal ? it’s no doing but his own , a consequence of the forcible line he’s drawn between them that he dare not cross . ❛ yeah , if anyone can work on a time crunch , it’d be you . i’m glad you’re enjoying your return so far , ❜ he hums sincerely . then there’s those eyes , that damned gaze that causes the heat to rise off the back of his neck , breaking the resolve of an otherwise steely man — a quality of finn’s that equally impresses and terrifies river . as if he’d melt from meeting her gaze any longer , he breaks it out of necessity , not want , trying his best to maintain his composure with his focus now turning to the tupperware in front of them as he takes his own first ( blissfully distracting ) bite . ❛ what’s first on the reunion tour ? gonna take it easy , or do you already have the itinerary packed with people vying for a piece of you ? i’m sure you’ve already done your weird twin thing with mason — ❜ he wiggles his fingers at her as if to punctuate the emphasis on weird , a teasing remark that suddenly teleports him back to the real world . they don’t live in a vacuum , just the two of them , as the intimacy of the shared moment might lull river into believing — there’s a real world , other people involved , other connections to heed : a quick recollection that saps much of the tenderness out of river’s lilt and forces him to take on as platonic of a tone as he’s able to muster while he adds another teasing remark . ❛ i’d invite you over for dinner with the pogue palace crew tonight , but i wouldn’t want you getting the idea that i’m tryna’ take over your days or whatnot . ❜
𝙃𝙀𝙍 𝙃𝙀𝘼𝘿 𝙏𝙄𝙇𝙏𝙎 , 𝙋𝙊𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙊𝙋𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉𝙎 𝙃𝙀'𝙎 𝙇𝘼𝙄𝘿 𝙊𝙐𝙏 𝙁𝙊𝙍 𝙃𝙀𝙍 , though it doesn't take much thought to know the answer . cool points aside , a smile upon river’s lips was a sight she'd do just about ANYTHING to be able to witness . it after all was a rarity upon the naturally sombre male , which made every time it appeared just that bit more noteworthy . “ sea turtles & smiling a lil’ more — but only if it’s GENUINE — would help , you’re right . ” she doesn’t linger to long on the thought before a laugh leaves her lips , “ i mean . i CAN tell you all about my awful time management & dismay at not living out a mamma mia fantasy . but just remember i gave you an OUT . you only have yourself to blame if you regret provoking me . ” she reaches for the offered spoon , a brow raising as he wiggles at him slightly , “ you want another way to gain cool points ? better have a recycling bin in here or else . ” it's all she says on the matter of the single use spoons before she lets out a small breath , “ who said i disagreed ? i just said no GIFTS . plus , we can consider this here , you & me sharing your gumbo the celebration of me being back . it's PLENTY for me . ” as the container is pulled from the microwave & he moves to settle in the seat next door , her position shifts as the knee to her chest falls to allow the sole of her shoe to come in contact with the solid ground once more & she shuffles forwards towards the edge . her eyes switch between the steaming gumbo & the darkened hue of his eyes as her lips crack into a grin , her pointer finger of her free hand coming up to tap the tip of her nose before pointing toward him , “ you know me so well because i CAN , in fact , find the excitement in rock gardens . even though i wouldn’t say excitement . it’s more an — APPRECIATION . i can appreciate them because have you SEEN how gorgeous they’re capable of being ? even the most unassuming ones have something to them . ” eyes lingered upon him for a moment , lips pressing together for a moment as she , for once , turned over the words that threaten to leave her lips . a careful judgement of how far is too far & how much is too much . but when has she ever not commented on his apparent lack of confidence in EVERYTHING he has to offer the world ? no filter was a given with her . tapping the edge of her spoon against the table to shift it in her hold , a single shoulder gives a gentle shrug as her spoon dips into the gumbo . eyes thankfully diverted downwards as she finally spoke , “ but you don’t give yourself enough CREDIT . you’re much more exciting & interesting than a rock garden . plus , unlike with rock gardens , i don’t have to be QUIET around you . ” her eyes lift along with her head as the spoonful passes between her lips , leaving her no other choice but to only give him raised brows at his pointed spoon . but those raised brows quickly shift to furrowed as her eyes narrow at him as she's free to speak once more , “ i forgot to add — you can only get me something when i'm finished ALL of my study & when is that you ask ? ” there’s a short pause as her eyes drift upwards to the ceiling in deep thought before her focus is upon him once more . “ in around 15 YEARS when i get certified in zoological medicine . ” saying it out loud sounded about as incomprehensible as most found it when she talked about the path she was on , but 15 years was nothing when you’d wanted something your whole life . though the corners of her lips had evened out , it was long before they were curling into a grin again as a bout of laughter fell from her lips , “ i don't know what the weird twin thing is but i CAN confirm that mason & i have reunited & the world is once more spinning on its axis . ” she goes in for another spoonful of gumbo as she continues , “ & as for plans . cannot yet confirm just how many people want a piece of me BUT i do know that this week ? i have planned to do a total of ZERO things other than catch up on sleep & spend the other remaining hours on the beach or exploring with rafie — poor baby only had jona to keep him company , he missed his mum — before i start my volunteering at n.e.s.t. next week . ” she tries not to focus too much on the way river’s tone seems to change as he talks once more , but between the gumbo & the teasing remark , it’s an easy distraction . “ oh , don’t you go joking about that kinda thing with me , river carducci , because you’ll have me bounding up the front steps of your front porch since you could give my MUM a run for her money with this gumbo . ” there's light teasing in her words but as her eyes lift to him once more , the smile upon her lips soften . “ speaking of the pogue palace crew — aiden & kai good ? ” there’s a pause before she gives a little gesture of her pinky towards him , “ & you of course — have you been good ? ”
The Society (2019-)
☼ 𝐑 𝐈 𝐕 𝐄 𝐑 . ››
𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐧𝐨 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐬 to the one finley bauer can bring out of him , a smile he’ll quickly attribute to as many platonic feelings as he can muster . as familiar as she may be to him considering their years spent in proximity , there’s always something unpredictable about finn that riv can’t quite say he dislikes . ❛ well contrary to what you’re choosin’ to believe , i do actually think you’re a lady , and a rather respectable one at that . minus the tik tok account , but i’m sure god will forgive you for that once you’re facin’ the big guy. ❜ he clicks his tongue , somehow more willing to play nice than on a usual day . relentless teasing perhaps defined their friendship , finn’s cheery demeanor bringing out the best and goofiest in an otherwise reserved and sullen male . ❛ power drills and sandpaper are my office , impressed yet ? how’m i doin’ in terms of cool points yet ? ❜ he motions to the workspace , brows arching in a playful challenge . ❛ ah , you’re full of it bauer . just say you’ve got better places to be and goooo , ❜ he chuckles , blowing a puff of air between his lips as he mockingly waves her off . ❛ just teasin’ . i’d love to split this thing with you , ❜ he clarifies softly , eyes alight with bright anticipation as he waves quickly to his boss to indicate the break and motions for finn to follow him around the benches and into the back breakroom . ❛ when’d you get in ? as much as i’m not one for surprises , this isn’t exactly a bad one . but heads up woulda meant i could have gotten you a gift , or at the very least swung by to pick you up , ❜ he explains , leading her into the back room and fishing through the contents of the fridge to locate his container . realizing quickly the extent of his mindless sharing , he quickly corrects himself with expert timing as he pops the unlidded container into the microwave . ❛ friendly gesture , of course , ❜ he clarifies , leaning up against the refrigerator as he takes in the longtime shining star of coston , as he’s designated her , in the flesh . ❛ now you’ll have to make do with leftovers and talkin’ my ear off under a time constraint , ❜ he laughs , arms folded across his chest as a moment of softness leads to a gentle drop in his voice . ❛ it’s really good to see you back , firefly . ❜
𝙎𝙃𝙀 ' 𝙇𝙇 𝙉𝙀𝙑𝙀𝙍 𝙀𝙎𝘾𝘼𝙋𝙀 𝙄𝙏 , the seemingly endless teasing about those god damn TIK TOKS . the mere mention of it has her rolling her eyes as her arms raise from her sides in a dramatic show of exasperation , “ oh SHUT IT . just because GRANDPA can’t grasp the idea of it all !! —- i’ll have you know my educational ones are REALLY taking off , you'll be laughing one day . mark my words . i'll get a wildlife documentary & everything . ” she highly doubted it but for the sake of lighthearted jest , becoming a wildlife documentary maker could easily be her new career choice . but as he gestures across his workspace , the smile that she’d forced from her lips found its way back upon her lips as she surveyed it with monotonous nodding , “ i’d say i’m getting up there on the impressed scale . ” but it was hardly his workspace that did it — more just HIM . “ i’d give you a solid — 8.5 outta the 10 available cool points . ” the bright grin lightening up her features shifts into something a little gentler in nature & it’s really just pure LUCK that he turns away just in time to miss the warmth that tinted the apples of her cheeks a faint pink . every god damn time . a quiet breath is taken as she followed after him but not before she spared a friendly wave towards the owner . as his path takes him towards the fridge , hers forks off towards the table within the room to pull out one of the chairs tucked haphazardly underneath it but just as she does , finn finds a quiet laugh falling from her lips . “ that’s a funny story really — but i will for once spare you ALL the details . so long story short , i got back saturday . ” fingers slip from the top of the chair as she shifts to sit though as she’s settling back , there’s a moment that catches her . turning her insides into the certain type of flutter that had , had her SCOLDING herself over time & time again . friendly , friendly , friendly — it had been tact on the end but it was perhaps the most important word to take note of . not that she needed anymore reminders that a FRIEND was the only thing she’d ever be to river carducci . which was FINE , even if the butterflies in her stomach suggested differently as the thought of him waiting for her at the docks flittered about her mind , she had accepted her fate a long time ago now . but there was no denying that the six lettered word hit her a little harder than it should , even if there was no mention of it upon still bright features as dark hues followed his movements . “ & i am GLAD i didn’t tell you because a gift ? ” her nose scrunched up , “ i don’t need a present — I’M not the college grad . maybe when i graduate i’ll allow something small like , i don't know — your mere presence . not that you're SMALL . you actually take up quite a bit of room but — you get it , i think . NO presents with a t . ” rambling comes to an abrupt soft as she noticed the shift in his features & there was no denying the shift in her weight upon the chair was caused by the weight of his eyes upon her . grinning river was one thing . but the way his voice dropped , turning the already charming drawl into something that sparked a warmth within her chest , was a whole ‘nother animal . with her knee pressed up against her chest & heel propped up against the edge of the chair , her chin falls to settle against the top of her knee as brown eyes bat twice before her lips part , the edges curved into a soft smile , “ oh , you know me . i’m sure i can fit the same amount of words into the span of half an hour as someone else can fit into a two hour speech . i reckon i’ll survive . i can think of WORSE places to be . though i should mention here is far from EVER being a bad place to be . ”
☼ 𝐑 𝐈 𝐕 𝐄 𝐑 . ››
𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 while working with tools sharp enough to sever bone , but when the familiar accented lilt enters the workspace , river’s caught too off - guard to heed attention to the dangers of carving while distracted . ❛ i’ll be damned , ❜ he bellows excitedly , dropping the tools back onto his station and turning to face the prodigal bauer . ❛ what , couldn’t call to give me a heads up ? i woulda worn my nice coveralls , i feel un - gentlemanly to be greetin’ a lady lookin’ like that while i look like this . ❜ he teases , smile taking to rugged features . his jest is simply to goof around with her , but it’s also not like river owned any particularly nice work clothes — they all resembled the ones he wore now , worn at the joints , covered in sawdust , stains , and paint . it wasn’t ideal , to have the girl appear while he’s mid - shift ; if anything , to see her while he’s at his grimiest is all but a painful reminder of the stark contrast between the two of them . but a visit from finn , one that signals she’ll be around for the season , is a definite silver lining he can hold onto . ❛ i can take my lunch right now if you have a free half hour , ❜ he offers , checking down at his watch before meeting the blonde’s gaze . the faintest of a grin takes crookedly to his lips , soft hues taking in the old friend of his with muted excitement . ❛ not that you were fixin’ to spend a half hour with me , but i’ve got enough leftover gumbo to make a saint cry . pretty much begging for a bauer to split it and tell me all about college life . ❜ at the risk of sounding too excited for her company , he adds a quick contingency in case she’s seeking an easy way to let him down . ❛ though i won’t take it personally if you’ve got places to be , i promise . ❜
𝘼 𝙒𝙄𝘿𝙀 , 𝘽𝙀𝘼𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙂𝙍𝙄𝙉 𝙎𝙋𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙎 𝘼𝘾𝙍𝙊𝙎𝙎 𝙃𝙀𝙍 𝙇𝙄𝙋𝙎 as his voice meets her own & it isn’t long before she began to move to round the counter’s edge , eyes finally landing upon the older male as his attention was pulled from his work towards her . “ now why would i have done that ? letting you know i was coming would have RUINED the whole concept of this being a surprise ! plus , catching people unawares is always the BEST way to know someone ya know . no time for them to get all gussied up , proper & FILTERED because you , river , are not looking at some LADY . who do you think i am ? ” there’s an exhaled puff of air as her nose scrunches a little with a small shake of her head , “ sign me up for sawdust & paint over a stuffy office & computers any day of the week , thank you very much ! ” the statement is ended with a definite , non-arguable nod of her head as she moved deeper into the work shop & closer to river . the grin upon his lips making the smile upon her own near unmoving as her head cocks to the side & brows raise in quiet question . if she was HONEST , she hadn’t thought much past the plan of simply coming to see him . for all she knew when she’d stepped through the door it could have been a simple & quick ‘ hi & bye . ’ she hadn’t even known for CERTAIN if he’d even be there . snagging a half hour lunch break was about the last thing she was expecting , but something she was more than HAPPY to accept . even if he was offering an out . “ half an hour you say ? ” brows quickly knit together as there’s a rare silent pause , as if she really had somewhere else to be , before her arm is raising to allow eyes to flicker downwards to check a non-existant watch upon her wrist . mimicking his previous action . “ i reckon i can squeeze you & a bit of gumbo in before i have to go figure out just where abouts on the beach i’m setting up for the remainder of this afternoon . ” & as her eyes lift to him once more & her arms falls to her side , there’s a smile teeming with mirth .
☼ 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐑 : ›› @carduccitm !! ·
𝙎𝙃𝙀 𝘾𝙊𝙐𝙇𝘿 𝙃𝘼𝙑𝙀 𝙎𝘼𝙄𝘿 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏 𝙄𝙎 𝙒𝘼𝙎 𝘼𝙇𝙇 𝙈𝙀𝙍𝙀 𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙉𝘾𝙀 , finding herself standing outside of the wood shop that a certain someone worked within , but who was she KIDDING — it was an excuse through & through . there was no reason for her to be there other than because she WANTED to be . but there wasn’t any harm is that , right ? river was a FRIEND — or at least in her mind he was — & thanks to some killer finals , the weekends she could have spent back home here in coston had been instead spent in the library & cooped up in her room within her college apartment , it had been WEEKS since she’d actually seen the curly , dark headed boy . so before she talked herself into back out , her hand lifted to push open the front door of the shop & crossed the threshold instead . eyes flittered around the interior of the seemingly empty shop , “ hello ? —- anyone about ? ” her voice filled the room as she approached the counter , neck craning a little to catch sight of the back of the shop hoping to catch sight of a familiar figure . “ i’m looking for someone called river carducci ?? i was told he makes some KILLER boards & he works here . ”
i just want them to know that i gave my ALL , did my best , brought someone some HAPPINESS , left this world a little better just because , i was here .