I'm confused about life, please help me.

22 // She/They // Australian

[emmi-avery-k]

University

I have a very real concern that I will not be able to go to study face-to-face at university this year. Where I live has had some strict border restrictions put into place, so I may not be able to go to university when the semester starts in February. This is a shame, but at least I have explored my options when it comes to studying at home. I am looking forward to studying languages, it is just a shame that I have to think about the fact that I might not be able to do it in the way that I learn the best. I am planning on studying French, Russian and Spanish, all of which are useful languages that can be used on the international stage as they are all official languages of the United Nations. I will go into more detail about the official languages of the UN in my next post.

[emmi-avery-k]

2021: The Relief We Need?

The big question about 2021 is whether or not it will bring us some much-needed relief from the hellfire that was 2020. I think we can all agree that 2020 was not our year and that things were not working in our favour for many of us. The answer to the question about whether 2021 will bring the relief we need is possibly a bit disappointing: not at first.

The reason behind this is because of the dangers that COVID-19 still poses to the general population. I am personally affected, not by someone I know who has the disease, but because I may not be able to study in another state this year due to travel restrictions and will have to do my studying online. 2020 was spent at home job searching for an entire year, which leaves me somewhat disappointed due to the fact that nothing came from my efforts and the fact that I may have to spend even more time at home being unable to develop my skills in independence is also disappointing. Back to the facts, though, the clusters in Australia are growing, so I can’t see the borders to my state being opened up any time soon. The USA is also experiencing thousands upon thousands of new cases every day, which does not leave me with much hope.

There is a vaccine however, and I am looking forward to when it arrived in Australia. The main downside, however, is that it will be a while before I receive the vaccine due to my position as someone who isn’t at an increased risk of catching COVID-19. I am still looking forward to when the vaccine arrives, however, and I hope that we can all work together in order to reduce the spread of COVID-19 prior to the vaccine’s arrival. I have dealt with enough from my mental health in 2020, I don’t need people like anti-maskers or people who believe COVID-19 is a hoax to push me back down into a dark place again. It will be a while before we can see the effects of the vaccine in society, but I hope that we can see it sooner rather than later.

[emmi-avery-k]

Hello

Hello everyone, my name is Emmi and this is my first post. I am hoping to write my opinions and share aspects of my life on the internet.

I am going to be completely transparent and say that I am confused about life. I recently turned 22 and sometimes, I barely feel like an adult. I am improving, but I feel like I haven’t experienced enough of life.

Spiritually, I am very confused. I don’t know what to believe in, but I have started practicing witchcraft within the past month or two. I am still very new, but I have drawn some cards recently from my tarot deck telling me to get out of my comfort zone and to celebrate what I have achieved already. Considering that I have anxiety, OCD and am on the autism spectrum, this is a very accurate reading and I hope that the future holds good things for us all.

I am also very confused in the gender and sexuality department. I am AFAB (assigned female at birth) but don’t really relate to being a woman. I feel like I am disconnected from a gender, but at the same time feel like I am lying. I am also confused about my sexuality, although it is very likely that I am either bi or pan. I am struggling to tell whether I am one or the other, however, and that is annoying. I understand that it is not necessary to have a label, but labels make me feel like I have an answer, and answers feel good.

I am looking forward to going to university again this year! I am studying languages, will update people on how university is going and, once I get to a high enough fluency, will even try and translate some of my posts into the languages I am studying.

I’m hoping to update this blog regularly throughout the year and into future years. I’m looking forward to sharing my journey with all of you as I share things from little changes to opinions about major events.