“ you’re the only one who gets to know! “
“ you. are. a. life-saver, ____! “
“ sorry, i was too busy dying to introduce myself. “
“ um… sorry if this is a stupid question, but, uh, what are you doing out here? “
“ you know, you’re a pretty good hunter, like ____ said. “
“ it’s been rough since ____ vanished. been rougher for some than others. “
“ it says right here. ____, personality type: squeeb. skills: none. friends: none. “
“ i don’t know what i expected. without ____ around, nobody would want to come back here. “
“ i’m not good at most stuff, but i like to help out. “
“ nobody will listen to me… but you, you’re pretty good at stuff and, well, nobody hates you yet! “
“ despite your lack of any and all useful skills, i require your assistance. “
“ sorry ____, inspiration is so hard to find. i just have to sing wherever it strikes me. “
“ lucky you, you get an autograph! “
“ i can see you are utterly starstruck. don’t fret, darling, i always have time for my fans. “
“ ____, you’re back! don’t you ever leave me agaaaain! ”
“ you’ve always wanted a life of adventure. i’m just holding you back. ”
“ you take care of ____… or else! ”
“ oh. i wouldn’t have come back if i knew YOU were here. ”
“ well, when you’ve been married this long, the little spats just pile up. doesn’t take much to knock ‘em all down. ”
“ you’ve got a way of digging up the truth outta the lies. ”
“ y'know i-it looks just a little bit… um, exploded. but i’m sure we can patch that up. eventually. ”
“ i don’t know nearly enough about YOU yet. i’m just itching to dig up more dirt! ”
“ shindigs like this don’t sit right with me. feels like i should be getting work done. ”
“ i, like, live here now. you started a party around ME. ”
“ you don’t know a thing about love! that’s why ____ left you! ”
“ i’m gonna do violence to you. ”
“ don’t act like you’re in charge. if you had the spine to lead us, everybody would still be here. ”
“ i’m ____ and i basically do whatever i want. ”
“ hmm… let’s just say i’m an 'information specialist.’ ”
“ unrelated fun fact: did you know that no international laws apply out here? ”
“ we have too many geminis around here and i’m gone getting caught up in social dumpster fires. ”
“ don’t joke around. i don’t want you taking risks to impress me! ”
“ you’re lucky it’s such a shallow cut. and stop squirming around or i’ll have to restrain you! ”
“ thanks, ____. i’d fall to pieces without you. ”
“ it’s like grandma always said: if you want answers, dig through their sock drawer. ”
“ just a cosmic reminder that nothing really lasts, eh? ”
“ i thought maybe time would help. but time’s just pushing me closer to the grave, and i’m not feeling any better. ”
“ ____, i apologize for putting you through such an ordeal. it was all for the same of art, and art is priceless. ”
“ nobody’s desperate enough to steal from you…anymore. ”
“ can we just quit it with the spooky stuff? i don’t think i’m gonna get any sleep! ”
“ if something goes wrong, sacrifice ____ first. ”
“ move along, interloper. whatever sort of spy or counter-agent you are, i’m not about to fall for your tricks. ”
“ my poor, sweet ____ has always been too trusting. ”
“ i wish i could tell you everything, but knowing the truth would only put you in more danger. ”
“ you’ve been an invaluable ally. i’m even tempted to call you a friend. but quietly, so i’m not overheard. ”
“ i heard nobody comes back from this place… sounds like a challenge to me! ”
“ i know i don’t have any real talent. my whole career was an accident! ”
“ you’re not better than me, ____. nobody likes all your snooping around. ”
“ ha! i don’t care what they think about me, as long as i make sure you get what you deserve. ”
“ i learned early on that life is like a box of trash. you always know what you’re gonna get… trash. ”
“ i’m not TELLING you the terrible secrets because they are TERRIBLE and SECRET! ”
“ unlike you, i don’t lie for a living. ”
“ don’t take this the wrong way, ____, but you are a bit high-strung. a little beauty sleep would do you wonders. ”
“ when you’re finished with your amusements, come see me. we have work to do. ”
“ i’m just so sick of feeling like an empty shell. i want to stop relying on everybody else. ”
“ i’m on the verge of a breakthrough. now, assist me or begone with you! ”
“ isn’t it SO sad that i call you my bestie? haha, i like, barely know you. and if i did get to know you, you’d probably hate me for it. ”
“ the world will crush you if you let it. i gotta be strong enough to keep you/____ safe from all that. ”
“ meet me outside my place. midnight. no cops. ”
“ i got this condition where i’m deathly allergic to jail time. ”
“ you’re a blight on society. ”
“ the more innocent somebody looks, the nastier the secret. trust me. ”
“ you are asking for opinions instead of facts. i’m not going to discuss my feelings with you, you emotional parasite. ”
“ very good! you’re actually being useful. ”
“ even after everything you’ve done, i still care about you, ____. ”
“ they—they left me… i guess that’s just what family does. ”
“ you think i LIKE being a scumbag? huh? a grifter, a hustler? it’s all miserable. ”
“ i wasn’t born rich, and that means i can’t afford to be happy. ”
“ ugh, was my writing always this sloppy? it’s not doctor bad, but still. ”
“ you’re okay! you are okay, right? no drowsiness, numbness, or missing limbs? ”
“ ____?! it’s really you! you’re here! alive… and… not dead! ”
“ oh, ____, it’s so good to see you! i can’t believe you’ve been here all this time. you’re so… different! ”
“ i’m a burden to everyone around me! that’s why ____ is gone! ”
“ please, just go. i can’t stand to see anyone else hurt. ”
“ i need some time to think. i still wanna figure out what i got wrong. when i do, i’ll come find you. ”
“ i give this party seven out of ten. which is pretty good, i guess… for you. ”
“ your apology is as lacking as your ethical standards, but… it’s a start. ”
“ you’re interrupting personal business. unless you have something intelligent to say, begone. ”
“ i don’t tell jokes, ____. i am not creative. ”
“ if you’re really not coming back, then… then what am i supposed to do without you? ”
“ is it over? please say it’s over. my heart can’t take much more of this… ”
“ also you’re legally dead. might wanna clear that up soon. ”
