all things grow

i made a lot of mistakes, in my mind jude isley; 25; medic aboard the uss enterprise

[entrlaurent]

"Lieutenant," he said with placid zeal. Smiling at the Medic, and knowing exactly who he was. His eyes were flat blue color, lacking light that seemed to mismatch the large smile on his face.

"Thank you so much for taking extra time," he said, like Jude had a choice. He looked Jude up and down, curious.  "It was at my request to interview you myself, sir. There some points I wanted to ask you about. Do you like, uh, coffee?"

[entrjude-blog]

“No problem, then.” He furrowed his brow, although the rest of him remained relatively jovial. There was something offputting about the guy, and he was pretty sure he was owning it--no point in trying to reject an interview, even with the dread in the pit of his stomach over the fact it was at his request.

Coffee. The fact he was being asked to have coffee completely flew over his head, unfortunately. “Yeah, I like coffee just fine. I...hope that wasn't the only question you had.” 

[entrlaurent]

"I have to interview everyone on the Enterprise, so I am afraid I can’t help pulling you out of your shift, sir/ma’am." 

[entrjude-blog]

“...Isley, sir. I, um--was part of the defense. I thought I'd already been cleared.” 

[aaron-paaul]

[entrjude-blog]

8, 9, 14, 16, 19

8. Your character has a much anticipated date this evening. What do they wear? 

Like most of my guy muses he probably just puts on a nicer shirt. In civilian clothes, he has a "nice" jacket that is quickly becoming a regular jacket because it's really warm. 

9. Assuming your character is sexually active, how old were they the first time they had sex?

17--with a boyfriend. He'd been anxious about it, and it didn't go perfectly the first time, but it seemed to get continually better from there on out.  

14.

[answered] 

16. 

[answered] 

19. Your character is cooking dinner for someone they care about for the first time. What is their signature dish?

The main way Jude was taught how to cook was to throw things together in a sort of weird lasagna/casserole combination. Whatever he makes probably has some kind of cheese and vegetable and pasta. A lot of the time, whatever he makes is vegetarian, even though he isn't one. 

[entrjude-blog]

14, 16, 18

14. What is the dominant color in your character's wardrobe? Dominant style? 

Blue, especially navies. It's a pretty easy color to find. Sometimes he'll try greys and blacks, or some kind of army green. He has a pretty good amount of music shirts, thrifted and bought from shows alike, which usually vary in color. Unfortunately he probably owns one of those Joy Division shirts.

16. Your character brings their lover over to meet the family for the first time. How does that go over? 

Jude's parents are just weird. Most of the time, people he's dated who meet his family think they don't like them, but half the time, they do--they're just private about it. His mom is a lot more vocal, striking up conversation, while his dad lingers in the back. Usually his older and younger sister will, respectively, behave the same way. 

18. Imagine your character is the protagonist of a role-playing game. What are their statistics? What is their highest skill, and what is their lowest? 

Jude's probably a paladin/combat medic type. Most of the skill tree would be dedicated to healing and defense. A few attack perks, but probably still his lowest stat next to some special attacks? Overall he'd be pretty balanced, he sticks to the sidelines but can throw his weight around. 

[sothasiil-archive-deactivated20]

[dsdsfdgd-deactivated20150704]

[annperkins]

puppies that look like aaron paul

[entrjude-blog]

slurred wordsss

He's--a good boss. I mean, I'm glad I cussed him out. I'm glad I'm not fired. I think he has troubles of his own so he doesn't wanna help with mine, and I don't want him to. That's weird. You know he was gonna send me off to Spock that first time I talked to him? That was fucking weird. 

When it's not work, he can be pretty cool, that's what I'm saying. I mean, there's the--I don't know, the thing we're having, and I don't know how that's going to fit in with everything else. But it's good. He's good. 

[entrjude-blog]

Slurred words - Jesús

He's good looking and he's nice. I think he likes me. Actually, I know he does, but--

I dunno. I hope he just kisses me sometime, and that can be that. I bet he's good. 

[entrjude-blog]

Jocelyn, Aurelan, Joanna

Miss--Treadway, she's really extreme, but always knows what she's doing. I don't blame her for yelling at me. I wish I wasn't afraid of her. I'm afraid she likes me now but once she finds out about all the stuff she won't. 

What happened to Aurelan? She was gonna keep the whole pregnancy thing secret, but I haven't seen her since. Maybe she stopped trusting me. She probably saw me with Chief McCoy, that's it--I mean, shit, I'd stop trusting me. 

Joanna's a great kid. I'm serious, she's too cool, she wants to be in space. If I knew how to teach her stuff I would. I need to check up on her soon. Maybe, like, bring her animal crackers? Does she like those? I always hated them. 

[entrjude-blog]

Send “slurred words” to hear my muse describe yours whilst ridiculously drunk.

[entrmccoy]

Leonard felt his heart knock against the inside of his ribs as he took the next drink, feeling a flicker of something like hesitance in the medic next to him. Leonard looked over at him, touching his arm to Jude’s as he watched him, not thinking about space as he sheepishly watched the kid. Yeah, he didn’t know what he was expectin’. Leonard felt a bit foolish even thinking this could work, but God, Leonard couldn’t even remember the last human being he even liked like this. 

He caught a glimpse of Jude’s quirk of a grin, and Leonard cocked a brow in jest. The smile made Leonard beam a bit, like something he wanted to keep close and hold privately because he knew Jude smiled a lot, but he just didn’t at him, Leonard McCoy. It buzzed warmly in his chest, like a mint julep, or a god damn gold star. It was probably dumb, but he didn’t really care. “Well, sweetheart,” he said genuinely, looking thoughtfully off to the side, “I know you understand what this is like - but I find that friendships tend to find you, whether you want them to or not. The Captain? I wouldn’t pick to be his friend to save my life. I am pretty sure he knocked a few decades off my retirement,” he smiled to himself, thinking fondly of his friend. If he wasn’t here with Jude, he would be drinkin’ with him. God damn dead bastard. What a dick. “Do you got anyone on this ship?” He asked suddenly, curious, “Everyone’s got someone.” Leonard realized then, he didn’t know any of Jude’s friends. It felt kinda stupid really, all this stress about whether Jude hated his guts, and he didn’t even know Jude that well. He guessed Olivera was a friend, and probably Susi, but the more Leonard went on - he realized he knew so little about Jude, despite reading his complete medical file - it was stupid. The doctor went quiet when Jude said no— Leonard feeling his heart beat kick up, and his ears redden slightly as their conversation stumbled, and Leonard realized it was his fault. Fuck, he could blame the julip— but nah, Bones was never one to blame alcohol for anything’, he just felt dumb instead. Leonard cleared his throat and looked off— probably looking bullish and irritable— when really he felt like a bag of eggshells. Leonard could take a no, he really could, dammit. Best move on and try to salvage something— He cracked a half smile, and shook his head, about to make some side-stepping comment about how he was happy that it took a fuckin’ lizard to fix their dumb scheduling conflicts when— Well, Jude said yeah. Or something’ like that. And Leonard blinked poignantly, side-eying Jude to see that the medic was serious. Jude was speaking with a carefulness that was oddly steadying to the dizzying Doctor. Leonard, with all the grace of a man who forgot he wasn’t actually fifty, couldn’t help but snort. He felt his tense shoulders wilt. “Looking’ fuckin’ day is right,” he lowered his voice privately to Jude, looking at the kid, and realizing they were quite close. Arm against arm, almost flank to hip at the bar. Bones realized he wasn’t being turned down. What was happening, he wasn’t exactly sure either, but it was nice. “I don’t know, now that I realize, if I ever properly introduced myself. I am Leonard, by the way,” he said to Jude, because it felt weird giving up his doctor title. It felt important though,  “and I heal people for a living. I am sorry for bein’ a dick to you.” He said then. Genuinely meaning it. “If you call me Doctor McCoy at this bar, I swear I will fire you though,” he said in mock-threat.

[entrjude-blog]

"Yeah, I got people. And I know they won't ditch me. So it's not all bad, I guess." He'd realized a little too late how self-defeating his tone had been--it was hard enough to get by with only a few friends, and he couldn't really expect to stay that way over five years. "Susi's my friend. And her friend, um. Olivi--Olivera, he seems alright, too. But I don't have anyone who's, like...my person." 

He thought about it for a few moments before elaborating, knowing his speech was a little slurred, but still rather energetic: "You ever met someone, and they just feel right? You're not freaking out or anything, and you just sort of realize they're your person. Not like it has to me, but I think it probably happens."

It was definitely something he'd sought, and watched other people look for as well. Whether or not it had happened was up for debate. "Probably. But it...life's too short to just look for that. Some people sleep with people to look for their person, but I just do it because it's nice. That's all." 

He put his cheek in his hand, realizing all at once he'd been waxing philosophical. So Jude pushed his drink away, glancing to him and listening with a careful, if not a little hazy, expression in his eyes. 

"Alright, Leonard." He nudged his shoulder, looking back down to the bar, then to the doctor. "I heal people, too, and sometimes try to protect little kids and accidentally blind them. So I'd be a dick to me too. How long did you want to stay here?"

[entrjesus-blog]

Jesús laughed too, as he could find himself agreeing with that and also find his face flushing, slowly, but he didn’t mind. The corners of his eyes wrinkled lightly, despite trying to stomp down the fluttering in his chest and the unraveling of silent and undeniable endearment. The room had become warm and maybe a little brighter. It could have been the coffee, what did he know.

"Definitely." He raised his mug, tipped his head and drank. 

Right. 

"I try to keep my distance from cats," he admitted, "but I guess I would not mind, all animals have something that’s fascinating, I am for dogs though,” he nodded, crossing his legs, resting his elbows on the small table. “I never had one when I was a child, unless the occasional stray counts. Now, Coyota’s really fun. You will meet her sometime, I promise.”

Something told him having the puppy around would help ease his nerves (but such was his luck, he didn’t doubt the opposite could happen, nor would he be surprised). “Ah. I’m going to ramble about that if you don’t stop me. Your turn for more questions, anything.”

[entrjude-blog]

"No, I mean--go ahead and ramble. I can't think of much." He smiled down towards the table, then glanced to him. God, he could see that his face had gone red, and he almost felt guilty about it. But there was something endearing to it, so he forgave himself.

Jude stretched and moved his legs just a bit, found his own knee resting against the pilot's--oh, fuck it--and decided to just let it rest that way. It felt normal. Maybe it was normal. "Yeah, I had a dog growing up. Good to have around. And...cats are alright, I guess, but they usually just ignore me." 

He wondered what became of the cat he saw aboard a few weeks back, or the guy who was carrying him. He remembered Jesús reacting with some discomfort the first time he brought it up, so he didn't push it any further. Maybe he should have. "Alright. So what's the thing you like most in a person?" 

[entrjesus-blog]

"It is loud," he said without hesitating, his smile softening just so at the memory of his home, of the town and the city not far from there and the little park with tadpoles and birds. "Plenty of sun all days, thank God, although that makes it just a little bit hot." 

He almost laughed, because of course he had to answer to him. The closer he got to that, the warmer his face became, so he took a sip from his coffee and hid half of his face behind the cup, nibbling on the edge.

"Then, ah, I chose piloting when I was a teenager; flying is liberating, in a way. You’re in control for a while, that felt good, still does. Gives you a little bit of security too, you know?" Not that he expected him to agree.

It all seemed futile because in the end, he did laugh, softly into his cup. “It depends, man, it depends. I— I’m gonna go with blondes,” oh shit fuck, ”and same questions. When did you wanna become a doctor, blondes or brunettes, kisses on first date, yes or no,” and suddenly, quickly, he added: “and what’s your favorite animal.”

[entrjude-blog]

"I guess," although the bemused smile indicated he had to think it over. Control. He guessed that made sense, but it didn't stop the fact things seemed like they'd slip from control quite easily. Jude put his chin in his hand, sipping from the mug while he listened to the questions. 

"Wasn't sure at first. But I guess just to take care of people. And maybe to make it less...scary for them, you know?" And for himself, he almost wanted to add, but he wasn't sure how to explain that part. But it was weird how coming up for an answer on the more superficial questions seemed even harder. "Man, I don't know. I guess brunettes, but it isn't really a conscious decision. Just sorta happens that way." 

God, look at the both of them, he realized, and he couldn't help but crack up. "I don't have an actual rule. If it feels right, then it just sort of happens, right?"

He ruffled the hair on the back of his neck, struggling for more questions. "And...dogs, I guess. You don't really see much else but them and cats back home. So I don't know if I really have an opinion. But I'm gonna guess you're for dogs." 

[entrjesus-blog]

Jesús looked down at his leg, although only to meet the sight of the table and his coffee, but he tried to disguise the sudden jolt that ran through his leg to his chest with a small smile and nothing more. It was difficult to stay still. It was so difficult.

Right. “Colombia, both parents from there, so,” he shrugged, looking up. ”Twenty-eight. I’d go with beer but I don’t know how that would make me look,” he said with a small wink before he shook his head and gestured to his coffee. “This too, though, definitely, it’s a life savior in the mornings. Blue too—” God ”—or green, I can’t decide sometimes.”

Of course he could, but Jude didn’t need to know that. 

"Okay okay, give me a second. Uh. What’s Luna like? And why do you like raktajino?"

[entrjude-blog]

"Colombia," he repeated, tucking it away for future reference. "I dunno. There isn't much sun--like, there's a sunrise once every month, you could hike out and watch it. But it's not that different from Earth. People treat each other about the same, I guess." 

He realized he missed it--not really the place itself, or his experience, but the bone-white slopes of the craters, the perfect silence that existed outside the colonies. "Always feels like Earth is really close. On a clear day over there you can see my city. And most of the time I can see--well, I guess by the afternoon I could see South America, all that." 

He grinned, taking another sip of his drink before putting the mug down. "'Cause it's good, that's why. Different from regular coffee. Usually I'll drink that black, but I like raktajino sweet. And I don't have it as often, so." 

Jude thought over his next few questions carefully, wishing he had some way to dissolve the nervousness between both of them. The part was the most startling was how Jesús seemed so on edge; maybe that warranted a question, too, in the future. "Alright. What's Colombia like, when'd you want to start piloting, and, uh. Blondes or brunettes. I don't know." 

[entrjesus-blog]

Jesús forgot all about his coffee for a moment, the idea somehow funny but, it made enough sense for him to begin considering it, and suddenly he had too many questions that he couldn’t even begin to put in words.

Carefully stroking his beard, he leaned closer and tucked his feet beneath his seat, before he nodded. “Sounds good to me! I’m up for it if you are.”

So before he could say anything else, he reached for his cup, took a sip, and gently tapped his fingers against the table. “We’ll start with simple ones, easy. Where you’re from, how old are you, what’s your favorite drink and color, I don’t know. And then, your turn.” 

(It seemed silly, but he would be more than happy simply hearing him talk about anything— anything at all, learning from him. Jesus). 

[entrjude-blog]

The first one kind of warranted its own discussion, he noted to himself, but he leaned back in his seat and thought through each question. "The moon--ah, Luna. We still call it the moon, mostly. But my dad's American. So's my mom, but her family was some of the first colonists." 

(Those, of course, were weird stories, that he was sure his mom would be disappointed over him remotely mentioning.) He leaned forward a bit, accidentally bumping his knee in the process--Christ, at least he knew where it was. He almost wanted to let it rest there, but he chose to hover just an inch away. 

"And...twenty-six. I guess I like coffee the most, the raktajino especially. And blue." He tugged at the hem of his own shirt with a smile, then realized he wasn't actually too fond of the shade of his uniform. Whatever. "Alright. Same questions, go."