is it just her, or did this feel impossible ? not only was she battling her own guilt, forced to engage with the other when she can’t stop replaying what happened between her and miller not all that long ago, but she’s beginning to feel like this entire conversation was calculated. like eden wanted to sow doubt, to knock her off her balance, somehow. and even though she’s not outright saying it, devon can tell that she suspects something, or at least, she’s noticed just how close they are again, and she doesn’t like it. this would be so much easier if she just said that, though. well, maybe not easier, but she would at least feel less… on edge. cheeks flush slightly at the mention of fletcher, embarrassed that she forgot to mention him. god, even if she isn’t purposefully trying to be cruel, she’s beginning to think that maybe she is, anyway. can’t ponder that for long, though, as eden’s words strike her square in the jaw. she could make it sound as innocent as she wanted, but she didn’t believe the act for a second. she could claim she wasn’t trying to sabotage, or play a game, but devon’s not stupid— that’s exactly what she’s doing. and she doesn’t want it to work, and it isn’t, for the most part, but there’s a tiny piece of her that she knows will cling to it, certain that she’ll spiral about it later when she’s staring up at the ceiling. what if she’s right— what if that wasn’t their ending ? no, it couldn’t be. “ i… well, no, it’s not really that simple, ” she defends, eyes narrowed. “ i did what i thought was the right thing, at the time. i just… wanted him to be happy. ” a cliché, but it was true. does she wish things were different now ? of course, but there was no going back. and part of her knows, now, that she possesses knowledge that could shatter eden’s view of this in an instant by repeating the words he said to her, not all that long ago— that he would leave her, if devon asked him to. if she was cruel, like she suggested earlier, that’s exactly what she would say. instead, she tries to tamper down the smirk that threatens to tug at her lips, looking at the other intently. “ what makes you say that, hm ? ” — “ just say it, eden. stop bullshitting me and tell me how you really feel, for once. ”
doesn’t know much about what was said between the pair, but since they’ve joined back in with the rest of the group, he can tell that something’s just off. it’s not like they’ve particularly gotten along, or ever really interacted with one another unless forced to, but the fact that neither one can meet his eye tells him all that he needs to know. there’s a hundred and one scenarios that shift through his head, and somehow being on the outskirts of it, and not knowing, has his anxiety skyrocketing. tries to play it as cool as he can, like the ability to remain calm and collected is an ability that comes easy to him, when in reality, he can’t quite keep still, always shifting his weight, in some way, or rubbing at tired eyes, scratching at the underside of his jaw. gets snippets of eden’s mood— that’s she’s obviously not happy about what was said, and that’s only confirmed when she insists that they’ll talk about it later when he makes an attempt to ask about it. it isn’t until everyone’s packing up for the night, downing the last of their drinks and retreating to their rooms, that he makes an effort to try again, but this time with devon. he approaches her in the kitchen, taking the spot beside her to help with the dishes, towel in hand to start drying what she washes. such a mundane task, but one that comes with a flood of memories— a life like this, that they once shared together. a life that he had to say goodbye to all too soon; one that he always thought they’d have together. “ everything’s alright, yeah? ” the question is phrased simple, easy. but he knows the complication that’s tied within it. “ like, you’re okay, i mean? feel like you haven’t been able to look at me, all night long, ” pauses, then, vulnerability on show for a second. “ did she say something to you? ”
