Working With Defiant Kids: Communication Tools for Teachers
What is the most important point to keep in mind when working with a defiant or noncompliant student?
The cardinal rule to keep in mind in managing conflicts with students is to stay outwardly calm and to maintain a professional perspective. For example, it is certainly OK to experience anger when a student deliberately attempts to insult or confront you in front of the entire classroom. If you react with an angry outburst, though, the student will control the interaction, perhaps escalating the conflict until the student engineers his or her desired outcome. If you instead approach the student in a business-like, neutral manner, and impose consistent, fair consequences for misbehavior, you will model the important lesson that you cannot be pulled into a power struggle at the whim of a student. Instructors who successfully stay calm in the face of student provocation often see two additional benefits: Over time, students may become less defiant, because they no longer experience the 'reward' of watching you react in anger; Because you now deal with student misbehavior impartially, efficiently and quickly, you will have more instructional time available that used to be consumed in epic power struggles.
How do I deliver a teacher command in a way that will minimize the chance of a power struggle?
You can increase the odds that a student will follow a teacher command by: approaching the student privately and using a quiet voice establishing eye contact and calling the student by name before giving the command stating the command as a positive (do) statement, rather than a negative (don't) statement. phrasing the command in clear and descriptive terms (using simple language that is easily understood) so the student knows exactly what he or she is expected to do (Walker & Walker, 1991).
http://www.interventioncentral.org/behavioral-interventions/communication-tools/working-defiant-kids-communication-tools-teachers








