Hai there!
It’s me. Coming at the blank Tumblr world with some late night thoughts.
I realized reading back on some of my posts that Tumblr has no way of dating a post? So for the record, this one is on June 24th 2020 at like 2amish. We’re in the middle of a pandemic and recession, Trump is burning us all down to the ground and everything is just peachy.
Anyways. Guys! (She says to no one in particular...) I’m headed into my late 20s soon. How scary. Where did life go?
I was reading some of my older posts and it’s a lot of negative thoughts because isn’t that when we’re most vocal about life, when we’re at peak frustration and disappointment? Tonight might be another one of those nights where I can’t sleep because I’m overthinking every move I’ve ever made and every hand of cards I’ve been dealt in my life, but for this particular post I’ve chosen to take a more positive spin!
Yes, I’m still highly insecure of how my life will turn out. Yes, I’m still highly disappointed with where I am and all the years I’ve wasted away on it. Yes, I’m going to still keep going for the next million years with a “technical over emotional” response to anything I come across.
But in this pandemic, I’ve started counting my blessings and there are so many little things to be grateful for! Here are some of mine:
- Me, my family and roommate are all in good health! We’re staying in and taking all the precautions to stay safe. Added bonus, we have the priviledge of being able to stay in and work from home.
- I have a place to live! We have plenty of food, access to clean drinking water, ability to keep up our personal hygiene and rest well in a peaceful environment. And yes the rent is too damn high, but you know what I’m lucky enough to have a decent rate and be able to afford it without having to cut back on my lifestyle.
- I STILL HAVE A JOB. Yes, I may be furloughed, but my current salary is still higher than my previous job even with the shortened schedule. This allows me to keep providing for myself AND my family as we all do our best to navigate the current situation. And I am damn grateful that I’m still employed (even though there is literally no work for us to do until buildings open back up)
- I am ENJOYING the place where I work! I may not be directly employed by the big tech giant themselves but they are my exclusive client and I get to sit on site and have access to their amenities. Yes, free food (all three meals!) is exactly as amazing as it sounds. And our specific team was able to remain employed at full rates for a month longer than our coworkers because oh yeah our client can commit to the cost. And my coworkers are actually my close friends and not just work relationships?? A total dream (and a total perk in this pandemic)
- I fully realize I have white privilege while still associating myself with the latinx population (it can be conflicting). I’m only listing this in my “blessings” list because this perk means I know my family has some larger sense of safety over others, especially with so much hate out in the world. I’m doing my best to educate myself, and others (including my family), on everything that is going on and do my best to form my own educated opinion. The fact that I am able to critically think and open myself up to different views and opinion, I think is a blessing on its own.
A lot of little things to be grateful folks! So yes, there’s a lot that I wish was different, but I’m so so lucky to have the basics covered in life. Relationships and accomplishments are luxuries on the side, I’m thankful for what I have for now ❤️
