madame natasha.

heavily headcanon based 616 black widow. written by lou. est. may 4th, 2012.

[exsovietspy]

INDEPENDENT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE BLACK WIDOW. written by lou. established on may 4th, 2012. this account is heavily headcanon based considering i’ve been writing natasha for over 10 years. 

activity on here is going be very slow. this account a kind of sort of hiatus to my mental health and i’ll be getting to things here slowly. if you want to add me on d.iscord to rp or just to chat, let me know! 

please be sure to read my carrd where my rules are. all pages are regularly updated. 

psd for icons. 

CARRD - HEADCANONS - VERSES

[exsovietspy]

i don't know who else might still be around, but if anyone is ever interested in rping again, i mostly do it on d/iscord. please feel free to add me, it's yautjamandibles. just let me know who you are.

[exsovietspy]

i blame marvel rivals for me signing back on this account.

[hraunwyf]

hey tumblr! did you know i have an emergency gofundme running to help me keep my housing while i desperately look for work, keep my fingies crossed about my SSDI case, and do everything i can to stay alive?

(bestie, did my fun graphic work?)

well, now you know! long story much shorter than i usually tell it, but i've run through all the charities in my area and no one wants to help me out since i don't have any kids! i can't qualify for a traditional loan or i would have taken it already! i don't have anyone who could take me in if i lost my apartment and my big city has no shelter space! i also really need stability so i can do things like hold a job down and get my life back in order and go to therapy and medical appointments! i have surgery in october and dang, it's even my birthday soon!

so hit that gofundme link up there and check it out! or click this one again here if you don't wanna scroll up! or you can also help via paypal or cashapp! most importantly, you could help by reblogging this post to spread the word, because you guys are my last line of defense this month! thanks so much!

[exsovietspy]

happy tenth anniversary to writing nat!

[INSERT AMAZING GRAPHIC HERE]

Hi, hello! Can you believe that it’s been ten whole years since I started my blog for Natasha? This time ten years ago, I was sitting in a theater watching the Avengers movie at a midnight premiere. Little did I know the journey that this character would take me on.

Although I wish I had been active through these years, my mental health did not make that possible, but even then Natasha has been on my mind since I first started writing her. This blog (not specifically this account since I have moved accounts twice) started off as an mcu centric blog under the name ‘aspecificskillset’. At that point I had not read a single comic. As I started to read more comics to learn more about Natasha, the blog eventually shifted to a 616 account. She helped me discover a love of comics that I didn’t know I had. It helped me discover more characters that have been integral in my life. 

Natasha holds a very dear and special place in my heart. I have met many amazing and wonderful people that I still talk to. People who are still in my life today and who I owe so much to. People who have helped me through rough and difficult times. Writing Natasha has helped me more than I can possibly describe and has given me experiences that I’m deeply thankful for. I have grown as a writer and learned to challenge myself. 

I miss everyone here. And I miss writing Natasha. I hope that one day soon, I’ll be able to return full time again and start writing her on tumblr. Yes. I fully plan on coming back. It will just take some time for me to do it. 

Thank you to everyone who has been around. Thank you to everyone who has written with me, talked to me, plotted with me. Thank you so much and I am so very grateful. 

Here’s to a whole decade of writing Natasha and to even more!

[chastaindaily]

Jessica Chastain on Tammy Faye’s ‘Radical’ Approach to Christianity | W Magazine

[avengerscompound]

Natasha Romanoff - Black Widow (2020)

[sebastians-stan]

Oh, you want to talk about your dating history?

[exsovietspy]

zimwy.

the  plume  of  color  on  barnes’  face  rings  his  eye,  a  split  at  his  lip.  he’s  wiped  the  blood  away,  and  the  wounds  will  close  with  a  confident  temerity,  but  he  looks  like  a  cat  that’s  been  left  out  in  the  rain.  miserable,  hung  low.  he  sinks  into  the  seat,  and  lets  himself  be  something  other  than  the  unassailable  winter  soldier  for  a  few  minutes,  briefly  covering  his  face  with  his  hands.  

‘  i  fucked  up  real  bad.  ‘   it  wasn’t  the  biggest  mistake  of  his  career–he’s  botched  assassinations,  lost  intelligence  and  secrets,  failed  to  conform  a  widow  appropriately  and  forced  to  put  her  down.  this  was  different.   ‘  i..  uh.  i  got  in  a  fight,  with  rj’s  real  dad.  ‘  his  hands  slide  away  from  his  face,  thudding  into  his  knees.  ‘  he  fell.  hit  his  head.  ‘   died.  he  doesn’t  have  to  say  that.  the  implication  hangs  in  the  air.   ‘  and  he  found  out.  hates  me  now.  ‘

while he speaks, natasha heads into the kitchen to grab him something to drink. she settles on tea, instead of alcohol, and puts the kettle on. she knows that this is something personal, by the mention of the names he speaks, and how he’s beating himself up over his actions. she knows no jokes can alleviate how he feels and she opts for silence until the tea is finished. she pours them both some and hands the mug over to james when she walks into the living room. 

“what happened exactly? to lead up to all of this?” she isn’t asking to judge, but to understand fully want happened with james. 

[exsovietspy]

zimwy.

that  was  alright.  they  were  busy  people;  this  is  the  first  moment  bucky’s  had  to  breathe  in  a  while.  there  was  that  thing  with  the  clones  and  mikhail,  then  rj  and  hydra,  then  that  dumb  little  blond  calling  himself  the  natural–though  his  new  york  apartment  isn’t  the  best,  and  he  misses  indiana,  he’s  just  glad  to  be  able  to  breathe  freely.  

especially  with  natasha,  without  the  heavy  binds  of  work.  there  were  few  other  individuals  whom  he  held  so  close  to  his  unguarded  heart.  he  can’t  help  the  chuckle  that  comes  out  of  him,  swapping  through  channels  for  anything  that  looked  mildly  entertaining.   ‘  i  hope  so.  i  noticed  it  kinda  freaks  some  animals  out.  had  a  dog  try  to  steal  it,  once,  but  he  couldn’t  get  it  off  my  shoulder.  i  guess  i  can  always  hang  it  up  if  she  doesn’t  like  it.  ‘  pleased,  alpine’s  purr  radiates  from  her  chest,  her  eyes  sinking  shut.  

natasha remains focused on alpine, from the soft fur coat beneath her fingers to the gentle vibrations brought on by her purring. she doesn’t care what james might pick to watch. she’s usually fine with anything, always consuming any sort of current media so she remains current on certain trends.

“she might be scared at first, but--” she shrugs. “i know she’s always been fascinated with all the silverware i have. your arm might just look like a big spoon to her.” every time she eats, liho is there watching the reflection of the light on the silverware she’s using. natasha fondly remembers an incident where she tried jumping on top of the cabinets to reach a spot on the ceiling only to fall on her bottom on the counter. 

[exsovietspy]

nodamnstogive​.

“My parents always wanted to go there,” Jessica said.

It had been one of those things that David and Mary had talked about all the time. Every year, they would make a plans to go to the Riviera and every year they wouldn’t go. By the time, Jessica was a teenager it had become a running joke at the Sunday dinner table. “When are you going to France?” Uncle Frank would ask and everybody would chuckle and shake their heads.

“How did you like it?”

“I didn’t get a chance to spend too much time there.” 

More like she ran through it without getting a second glance because she was running away from someone after stealing something for someone else. It was always the same story. She’d be able to go to some place she found beautiful and then she would have it interrupted by someone or be there solely for a job. 

“But what I saw was beautiful.” 

[exsovietspy]

nodamnstogive​. 

“Why not?” Jessica said as she took a seat in Natasha’s car. She had nothing better to do at this godforsaken hour anyway.

“How have you been? Long time no hear.”

She took off the moment she knew that Jessica was settled in her seat. “Busy, as always.” She didn’t know when she’ll have a break next so she was going to enjoy this moment and get herself some decent pizza.

“How about yourself?” 

[exsovietspy]

cupidquinn​. 

   “Ooooh, that’s a good plan, too,” Harley replied, rubbing her chin thoughtfully. “Welllll…I mean, of course I know a few great places. There’s this one sushi place where ya can order this big ass mixed platter that they’ll serve on a cute wooden boat. We could do a tour of the local food trucks and stands that come out at night and make the whole damned city our date night. Gotta warn ya though, I can eat.”

“The food trucks sound wonderful.” That sounded far more interesting to her compared to everything else. The idea of having a night with Harley, spending time with her, eating good food, and getting to know the city? She had absolutely no complaints. “And you’ll be surprised to know how much I can eat.” 

[wearealsoboats]

understand that you are projecting your own insecurity at jessica. break through your fears. trust your colleague. 

[wearealsoboats]

Natasha and Jessica in Secret Avengers

[exsovietspy]

@sebastianshaw sent: “well, i guess that’s broken.”

she stares down at the broken glass on the floor, trying her best to not get as frustrated as she’d like to. she’s learned that being around shaw meant that frustration would happen daily if she allowed it. she takes a deep breath. 

“you bumped right into me and made me drop my tea. i was very excited for that.” 

[exsovietspy]

@sebastianshaw sent: “if i wanted help, i would have asked.”

frustration appears on her face and she narrows her eyes at him. she rarely ever wants to help him, but this time she decided to give it a chance.

“then you can handle this mess yourself, dear.” 

[exsovietspy]

@zimwy sent: “it’s like i’m cursed or something.”

“you’re not.” 

she moves closer to james, reaching forward to brush her fingers through his hair in an attempt to soothe him. she knows the struggle, wondering if she’s also cursed with every single bad thing that comes her way. they both live lives that bring them nothing but pain and frustration. and she knows there’s been a point in her life where she wonders the same thing; is this all because of her? 

but even then, she tries her best to remind herself that neither of them are at fault for what happened in their lives. that lies with the people who made them into what they are. the people who thrust them into this life without much thought of what it might do to their minds. 

“you’re not cursed,” she says, her hand now moving to his back and gently rubbing between his shoulder blades. she doesn’t know what else she can tell him other than she doesn’t believe he’s cursed.