Find My Way
Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader
Summary: Simon comes back after a long deployment, will you let him back in?
Word Count: 1,157
Warnings: Some swearing, potential grammar mistakes, Simon is dumb and handles things immaturely, possibly ooc? Let me know if there's anything I should put.
A/N: listened to Begin by Danny Padilla, had a breakdown, bon appetite
Read it on AO3
Anti AI divider other divder
Simon's hand was balled into a fist, hovering over your door. His heart thumped in his chest as he worked up the courage to knock. Maybe he should've called first...
"Here goes nothing." He mutters to himself.
He knocks. Each tap against the wood almost echoes in the hallway of your apartment building.
Moments pass, he hears nothing.
Should he knock again?
Or are you not answering?
Your neighbor still has a wreath hanging on their door, covered in a red ribbon and fake snow, a gleam from the glittery bow kept shining in his eyes. The shine reminding him that it's been a while since his last visit.
The last visit where he admitted he loved you, then he left for half a year.
Tensions were usually high when it was almost time for Simon to leave. He wasn't ignorant of your concern; it was in every glance, every touch, and every kiss.
He tried telling you that he'll be alright. But he knows it's not enough to quell your worries. His years of tactical training, and years of experience in highly intense combat with ruthless killers pale in comparison when you stare at him with those pleading eyes.
You've been seeing each other for a little over a year, and you didn't mind how cautious Simon was to let you in. In fact, you were relieved about it. You had trouble letting your guard down just like he did, perhaps that's what kept him around.
It just didn't stop you from caring about him.
This would be the second time he's been called back to work. Though the first time he left, he was only gone for 2 months.
This time he's not sure when he'll be back, or if he'll be back.
So he distances himself from you. He went from spending every spare moment at your apartment, to going home alone because he needs to pack, to barely answering the texts you send him. It would make him leaving you easier, right?
Surprise, it doesn't.
He's due to leave in a few hours, he's fully packed and expected to be on the base before dawn. But he can only think of you, you didn't call him when you got off work yesterday, he's mad at himself for being disappointed.
He tells himself that he doesn't really need you, he doesn't need anyone. He can't get attached to people because of his job, it's too dangerous.
So why does his heart ache when he thinks of you?
At that moment, his phone buzzes and lights up, taking him out of his thoughts. It's a text from you.
Is there any way I can see you before you leave?
He stares at the notification, he wants to. He really wants to see you. He unlocks his phone to respond but stops when he sees his background. It's a photo of you when you fell asleep on his couch. It was a couple months into your relationship and the first time you spent the weekend at his place.
He came back with dinner and saw you asleep bundled up with his blankets, you looked so peaceful in his home. Fitting into the corner of his couch like you always belonged there, next thing he knew he had his phone out to take the picture. He didn't want to admit it then, but that was the moment he fell in love with you.
Fuck, he loves you. He loves you and he's been an idiot.
He opens the text and responds, I'm on my way.
He puts his bags in his car and drives to your apartment. He has to see you, just one more time before he's thrown in the rage of war.
On the way there, he's caught by every red light, driving behind the slowest drivers. Fucking hell, he thinks. By the time he parks at your building, its thirty minutes later and he's agitated with the less amount of time he has with you, he just wants to go inside.
Simon unlocks your door with the key you gave him. You shot up from the couch when you heard the door, smoothing your shirt down in a vain attempt to look more presentable.
Simon meets your eyes and pauses, "Sorry it took me so long."
"It's okay," You slowly walk up to him, caution in every step, "You're here now."
"That's not what I mean."
You're inches in front him now, looking up at him with furrowed eyebrows and a slight tilt to your head. "What do you mean?"
In a quick motion, Simon shuts the door and places his hands on your cheeks; his fingers pressing lightly on the base of your neck.
"I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you that I love you."
He rubs his thumb over your cheekbone, leaning in to press his lips against yours. It's soft, patient. You're always so patient with him, you deserve the same treatment.
"Simon—" You place your hands on his forearms, "Where is this coming from? You love me?"
He rests his forehead against yours, "I do, is that alright?"
You let out a giggle, "Of course."
You only have a few hours with him, and you know it's going to break your heart to watch him leave. But you just can't help yourself.
"Of course, it's alright, because I love you too."
Simon gives you the biggest smile you've ever seen from him, and he's going to spend the next few hours showing you just how much he loves you.
Simon bows his head and sighs, it's been five minutes and you haven't answered.
He begins walking down the hallway with his eyes cast down. He presses the button to call the elevator.
It takes a few moments, but the doors open and he hears a gasp. He looks up and his eyes widen when sees you standing there with bags of groceries in your arms.
You hurriedly step off the elevator, "You're back."
Hearing your voice again releases the tension he's felt in his chest for the last seven months, you place the groceries on the ground and wrap your arms around his shoulders. The scent of your perfume fills his nose and he almost breaks down then and there. He missed that smell, he missed you.
He holds you tight against him, fearing that if he let you go you would fade away.
"You should've called." You whisper in his ear, and he chuckles.
"I know." He kisses your temple, "I know, I'm sorry it took me so long."
You unwrap yourself from him, "Come on home, Simon." Your voice is as soft as ever, and you're beaming at him. "I was just about to make dinner."
He picks up the groceries and lets you lead the way. When he finally enters your apartment, he's never been so sure he's exactly where he's supposed to be.
Find my way.
In the skyline tonight,
You're the better view.
Do you mind if I stay?
When the highlight of life
Might begin with you.