fake it you die

expert tips for masking in adulthood for people fortunate enough to be able to but unfortunate enough to HAVE to call that medium functioning i guess its miserable but we must survive

[false-normie]

The first two hours of the workday at least, you do not have to load the personality up. Let the phrase “good morning” be the autopilot that carries you. It gets you big polite points that actually scale with every use. It doesnt “get old”, you become the polite “good morning!” interaction they anticipate.

The best use of this is when youre running late. Bosses often wont even notice it if youre routine with your “Good morning!” because they’re just gonna be locked into their own social script of exchanging morning pleasantries with you. Take advantage of the fact that we ALL run on social scripts, feed others a line they can easily respond to that yields a positive interaction for both. Yes its fake- youre both at work, youre in fakey make pretend land for as long as youre paid to play that character.

[false-normie]

some jobs you have to wear uncomfy shoes for, or else you look “unprofessional”

just pack those uncomfy shoes in your bag

they dont have to know you wore your slippers for the whole drive/ride/walk to work. you can bring the uncomfy shoes just for walking in the building- and most likely you can get away with discreetly changing right back to the slippers when youre at your desk. just remember to switch back when you get up.

note - it IS socially acceptable to have slippers you change into AT your desk. meaning if someone sees you walking around in your slippers and says something, you can just say theyre your “desk slippers” and haha whoops you forgot you put them on. the only lie you need to tell is pretending you dont wear them often, act like its just for those particular few days when your feet reallyy hurt. it cant just be that you wanna be comfy to work all day. that’s seen as lazy, but “emergency” comfy shoes are fine.

desk slippers are more socially acceptable than bag slippers. theres a very specific social rule at play here. you can in fact walk through life prepared to take care of yourself- but you cant look “THAT” prepared. “THAT” is vague and hard to define. but ive figured it out:

in an office/formal kind of context, its autistic to “have to” have comfy shoes on you at all times. the normies may even freak out and escalate it into you being belligerent and a problem. for being comfy.

but having a preparation you pretend to use much less often is better than letting them know you do it all the time. the desk slippers get a pass by being a part of your desk. its seen as smart. it shows how focused you are on optimizing your work space if you have desk slippers. even an extra cushion on your chair or a tasteful blanket can be passable in the confines of your cubicle. many offices run cold, and plenty of normies keep a blanket or cardigan on hand for that reason. if these articles are all grey or black, you definitely fly under the radar. theyll be practically invisible in the workplace and im not exaggerating.

dont hurt your feet for social rules. also dont get flack for being “unprofessional.” do wear the uncomfy shoes, but only for as little time as you have to.