The Truth (and the death) of the Blog
Hey, all! So I know not many people will see this, but I wanted to make a statement and shed light on a lot of the goings-on behind this blog, and an update on what the future holds. I know almost all of our followers have moved on or are now inactive, but I still feel the need to put this out there.
What Griffinilla did was disgusting and inexcusable. Taking advantage of children is the lowest, most horrific thing anyone can do, and I’m mortified to have incidentally built a shrine to him, which is why I’m about to purge the entire thing. The name will be changed, every post will be manually deleted, and any reference to Fandroid/Griffinilla will be scrubbed. I may outright delete the entire thing, if I’m behind honest. If I do decide to keep the overhauled blog, it’ll probably just be used for a totally different set of topics!
So, a few words about what exactly was going on behind the screen of Fandroid-Fanclub, and why I left initially. I turned thirteen about a month before I created the blog, and basically all of the posts from before I made my first exit were the incoherent and extremely inappropriate ramblings of a child who was just discovering certain topics and honestly didn’t know much better. Completely unmitigated internet access at that age felt like freedom. I thought I was mature and edgy, and I paid for that naïveté in ways I’ve only ever told a couple of people, even in the real world. I was easy to take advantage of at that stage, and adults on here absolutely ran with that possibility. I’m sure a few of you remember Mod Chica: all of her posts and mentions were deleted as soon as I got the login back last year, but for you guys who’ve been here since 2017, you probably haven’t completely forgotten her. She’s one of the main reasons that Tumblr still gives me a bad taste to this day. She groomed me and often demanded intimate messages, photos, or phone conversations, knowing full well that I was a thirteen year old child. For context, she was nineteen at the time. Her explanation was always that she was severely depressed and harming herself and that my interactions with her made her feel better. I spent SO many months talking her out of suicide on an almost nightly basis and being more or less her emotional support punching bag at all times. She tried multiple times to plan out an event where we’d be able to meet up in person, and described exactly what she’d like to happen between us when we did. I’m not going to go into specifics, because no one needs to know, but I’m completely horrified. I’m not even calling her out with this post- her old URL has been deactivated for years and I have absolutely zero interest in any form of contact or confrontation with her. (Oh, and not to mention that she was cheating on her girlfriend by acting with way with me. Her girlfriend (also nineteen) hated me and would only interact with me in nasty remarks because, in her eyes, I was seducing her lover. This seemed valid to me as a child, but as an adult now I can see how absolutely insane and twisted both of their ways of thinking were.)
Again, this is something you’d only remember if you actively witnessed it, but do you remember when a bunch of asks started shipping Chica and I? And I got super upset and uncomfortable about it, which then caused a lot of people to push it even more because it was just a funny little joke? Yeah. By that point, I was already trying to distance myself from her because it seemed wrong to continue that relationship. She constantly told me that she loved me and I was one of the most important people in the world to her. In an interesting coincidence, Mod Code was one of the few people who openly told people to knock it the hell off, even though they were just a spectator at the time. I’d remembered their message for years and always appreciated it, and I didn’t even realize it was them until we’d been friends for months after I started the blog back up in March 2023. That simple interaction has meant a lot to me, and even though I don’t think they plan to post here again, even after the potential overhaul, I wanted it to be said.
There was also a second person involved with me in an extremely inappropriate way, very, VERY similarly to everything I described with Chica above. I also am pretty certain he’s been deactivated for years, and I don’t even remember his name, but it was equally as horrific. He also reached me largely through the Fanclub and unfortunately was also nineteen years old at the time.
For further context, I’m now older than both of them were at the time, and I can’t even imagine how sick someone would have to be to ever even consider looking at a child so young in that way. Absolutely disgusting and I hope they’ve both grown up and realized how awful they were and have never hurt any other children again. Kids are here to be protected and taught, not to be exploited or used as your on-call therapist.
I want to stress that absolutely none of the other mods at the time had any idea about any of this! Dorren, Sonic, Ink, TV, etc- none of them knew, and Chica worked very hard to keep it that way. It took me years afterwards to process and be able to even begin to open up to anyone about it. The other mods were all very sweet and genuine people, and I hope they’re doing well! They likely will never see this, but the sentiment is still out there for them. So yeah, that’s the main reason I resigned from the Fanclub and deleted my personal blog back in the day. I didn’t want either of them to find me again, and Fandroid itself has always reminded me a bit of that experience, which is why I’m so completely disgusted by Griff and his actions that I’m wiping the slate clean. One of our followers asked me a few minutes ago why I would do that, since Fandroid and Griff aren’t the same person. True, Fandroid the character is a cute little guy who isn’t a pedophile, but his creator is and he used him to lure children in. So, SO many children trusted Griff without question because of Fandroid and his other fandom contributions. We looked up to him. We supported him and unconditionally almost worshipped him at times because to us he could do no wrong, and that mentality established by his work that exclusively appealed to young children kept his cycle of abuse going. Given my own personal experiences with the topic, I think it’s time that this blog is finally put to rest. It’s the right thing to do. Even without taking my history into consideration, I still wouldn’t feel comfortable perpetuating a Fanclub solely focused on characters created by a man who could do such heinous things.
I’m going to delete the rest of the blog now, but this post and the original blog name will remain up for the time being (probably a few days) for y’all to get a chance to read it. At that point, I’ll decide whether or not to delete the blog itself, or give it a full overhaul.
Thank you all for being here; I’m sorry it turned out this way. I do have several great memories of running this club and interacting with y’all that I’m genuinely sad to see go. A lot of y’all were a really fun part of my childhood, and I’m glad I got to hang out with y’all for a time! If you read all of this, thank you.
With love and for the final time,
Mod Bot
