help

hi I'm Adam, 17, ftm, filthy truscum, he/him pronouns only please, gay, DNI aloe.

[hydro-homies]

I see a future in this.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Operation Bread Jesus is go.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Dough proofing in the oven, 90mins is enough time to watch a cheesy movie. I’m thinking an Godzilla.

[shetanshadowwolf]

Hey Gallus, since i feel like I’m late to the show, how big of a Bread Jesus are you making this unholy Easter-April Fool’s ?

[gallusrostromegalus]

…I’ll know when I take the dough out of the oven in an hour?  I’ve never made Challah before and I’m not sure how much this will rise.  But I have a slightly-smaller-than-average sized oven, so it’ll have to fit on a cookie sheet. Hence, Baby Bread Jesus.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Update: he’s beautiful. Also, I’ve made a serious tactical error in that I don’t know how I’m getting him on to the baking sheet.

[cacklebarnacle]

Do you have something flat without raised edges? Put flour on it and carefully lift Baby Bread Jesus bit by bit up and slide the flat item underneath. Then you can just transfer him onto the baking sheet.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I got him on via the silicone baking sheet, and he’s in for the second coming proofing and already beginning to distort into a monstrosity. I love him.

[cacklebarnacle]

That sounds awesome.

While he’s proofing, do you mind telling us, how you got the different colours of the dough? Different dough? Food colouring?

Is he filled with jelly?

[gallusrostromegalus]

The light color is regular Challah Dough, the darker color is the same but with a bit of molasses and cinnamon.  I’ve done it before for other sweet doughs where I wanted a color change.

He’s not filled with Jelly becuase 

1. I’m renting and don’t want to lose my damage deposit becuase there’s smuckers on the ceiling.

2. I try not to keep grape products in the house in general (the juice is a noted passover exception) because Mr. Charleston Chew thinks all things grape-related are delicious and Grapes are very, very toxic to dogs and I don’t want to have to put him in hospital for 3 days to pump his kidneys again.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Well, there’s definitely enough of him to go around?

[rettaroo]

HE HAS RISEN

[gallusrostromegalus]

SIGNIFICANTLY MORE THAN ANTICIPATED.

smells hella good tho. Candy googly eyes were a good choice too, I think.

[fathomferal]

PRAISE BE

[catwithaknife]

here are my favourite babycenter.com poll questions from the past week

[offensivememes4u]

Facts tho 👅

[memescomedy]

[fathomferal]

ALOE PLEASE JUST STOP I DIDN’T MEAN WHAT I SAID

[mogaician]

Wanna delete tht post, ashe?

[fathomferal]

Stop calling me ashe for fucks sake. I'll delete it. Fine. Please stop spamming me

[fathomferal]

ALOE PLEASE JUST STOP I DIDN'T MEAN WHAT I SAID

[fathomferal]

I don't know the name of aloes blog I don't know how to stop this someone help me

[fathomferal]

If you know who I am don't say anything

This is an undercover blog, ok? Don't call me by any other names that you know me by that aren't Adam.