(For the people who follow me for leftist-adjacent smut-adjacent philosophical stuff: ACAB also includes the cop inside your brain, because fuck that guy, he over-analyzes every single thing and he sucks at it, you don't have to rationalize a thirst follow back to him, sometimes you can just say "You follow my niche smut blog and have great tits, I'd like to see them on my dashboard again soon without relying on the vagaries of fate and my followers.)
(For the people who follow me for sorta disaster queer bestie vibes: holy shit, I didn't even notice until I was brushing my teeth, but my ponytail is just ridiculously bouncy right now? Where are these waves coming from? Oh my god, bitch, this is a thing? Wait, okay, is there anyone else who follows me for these vibes other than J? I feel like there might be a couple others, or maybe a couple of you are just like witchy millennials and I read that as here for the queer bestie vibe thing? Anyway.)
{For the people who follow me for intox kink: Take a blinker and hold it.)
(For the people who follow me for degradation. jesus christ, why would you fucking do that? That's disgusting. I don't think anyone could be this pathetic on accident, but maybe you're establishing new fucking lows. Fuck's sake, are you just a dumb little bitch?)(Enjoy that one, degradees.)
(For the people who follow me for intox kink: I didn't say to let it out. Look, you're gonna have to try again. Take a blinker and hold it.)
(For the people who follow me for babimhypnosib: I respect you and we should probably be on a watch list for this.)
(For the people who follow me for fauxcest, you should be swallowing your big brother's cock right now, kid, and you better make me cum down your throat before you even think about cumming grinding on my boot.)
(For the people who follow me for intox kink: No, no, no, hold it, I'm focused on this before I let you release the breath, just do the alphabet in your head as fast as you can, no, no, like each letter separately though- oh, kid! Okay, okay, you almost had it there. Third time, you can get it, so you're gonna try again. Take a blinker and hold it.)
(For everyone following me: Drink some water. If you want to substitute another liquid, it can't have caffeine. Deal with it, sweetheart. You'll earn a gold star if you follow the rules.)
(For the porn star who follows me for intox kink: You're almost high enough. One more blinker. Hold it as long as you can. Just let it out if you have to, I'm timing it. Oh, okay, good start. Now we're going to do a blinker again. We'll get several and average the times. So it's scientific. Don't worry, just don't think.)
(For the porn star who follows me for intox kink: You're almost high enough. One more BLINKER. Hold it as long as you can. And repeat this all again. And again. Repeat those repetitions, too. Mindless time for you. You've earned it.)
(For the people who follow me for the weirdly unhinged swings in the tone of my posts: Enjoy this one, y'all are weirdos. 🖤🖤)
(Porn star, Tongue out, show me your tits. Do you need another hit? If you thought about it, you're not dumb enough. Show me your cunt.. And Repeat this post until you're too dumb to read. )