This is Gospel

Daithi MacNamara || 39 || Master ++++ I believe there's a thing called a gun, and I believe there are things called knives. I believe they can destroy everything you are inside. I believe nothing escapes once they decide.

[caleb-roman]

Beau’s hands were shaking a little as nervous energy surged through him. His eyes followed each one of Daithi’s steps, and he was less afraid of the man potentially lashing out at him physically than he was of hearing pain in his voice. He closed his eyes as Daithi reached out to touch the collar, and Beau drew in a breath that was anything but steady. He could understand how his behavior must look to Daithi, and he didn’t blame the man for his anger, or his frustration, though the strength of both were a little unexpected.

“It isn’t that,” he said quietly, resisting every urge to reach out and touch Daithi’s hand. The pressure to maintain this separation was painful. “I never thought I should be your equal.. I did want more respect, and when Kai was here,” (and ugh, just the man’s name made Beau wince, because it was both painful and humiliating to know how desperately he’d thrown himself at Wenkai Ji), “He talked to me like he respected me. And it was so good. I thought we were- but then he just left. And I felt so lost.” Beau couldn’t make eye contact anymore. It was like confessing to a crime. “Ano was always kind to me.. and when he asked about the claim- I already f-felt far away from you, and Kai was gone, and I was depressed and he was /there/and he wanted me, and I didn’t want to say no..”

God, he wanted to curl in a ball. He wanted to hide in his bed and never be seen by Daithi again. Because yes, he had wanted more respect. He’d wanted to be treated like a real person. And here he was now, collared exactly like a dog, and he couldn’t ignore the awful fact that part of him liked it. Even if Ano didn’t love him, he was still kind. He still patted Beau on the head and told him he was good. Beau had wanted respect, but he had none for himself. Not in that precarious, painful, lonely moment when Ano had asked him, in that honey-sweet voice of his that seemed to promise hours and days and weeks of the kind of attention Beau was starving for.

He was so tired of crying in front of Daithi. It felt like that was all he did anymore every time he and the man crossed paths. “I’m sorry,” he whispered faintly. “I didn’t think it all the way through before I said yes. All I could think about was how bad I felt and how much I wanted to belong to someone.”

[fearless-renegade-blog]

Daithi did his best to listen to Beau, to listen to his words and what he was saying. He wanted to belong to someone and once again, Daithi had fallen short of what he wanted. He wasn’t about to play a pity party game on who needed what the most though. Beau was clearly lost, seeking out comfort in whoever would welcome him and currently that person was Ano. 

It was enough to drive the MacNamara insane. Beau deserved better, he deserved so much more than a pink collar and sweet words. He deserved to be happy in the most organic way possible. He shouldn’t have to seek it out in the arms of a man who wanted to use him, to hurt him. Whether or not the boy saw it now and whether or not it was happening immediately, Ano would hurt Beau. It was only a matter of time. 

“Please stop apologizing, Beau,” he muttered, closing his eyes and sucking in another shaky breath. “Stop it. You’re doing what you want and that’s up to you. That’s your decision to make. I don’t want you to apologize for your actions, for things that felt right. You wanted this. So you have it. You go and you do whatever it is you need to do, Beau. You have him so you go to him. He paid money for you, collared you, and there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it.” He stopped, pressing his tongue against his teeth and he tried to find the right words to say because these weren’t it. This wasn’t how he wanted this to go. 

“I’m not going anywhere, Beau. I’ve been here with you, for you, since day one. So when you figure your shit out....come find me.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

bstrdxexecutioner:

“Sounds like I missed a lot o’ fun then Uncle D.” Delaney just laughed, mostly at his uncle, who turned in to a nervous sheep all of a sudden “Don’t worry, I already heard ‘bout the cullin’ and shit, was more interested in what’s been goin’ on with you.” he shrugged his shoulders and smiled. “Ya been alright yeah? Ya fuckin’ look good, though older. Ya got greys Daith.” he chuckled, plucking a hair from his uncles head with a smirk.

Daithi rolled his eyes with snort as he reached up to smack Delaney’s hand away from his hair. “Hey you try running this place with your Uncle B. And worrying about your sorry ass.” He was teasing of course, sort of. He’d been worried about Delaney since the day he’d left, but he knew he’d be okay. He would make it back and the MacNamara wasn’t wrong. “Just wait until you’re old and grey.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

invisibeau:

Beau’s cheeks colored darkly in embarrassment and after taking in Daithi’s expression for a few seconds, he lowered his eyes back to the box he was filling. He hadn’t expected this meeting to happen so quickly, but of course Daithi would have found out. Beau had hoped that, somehow, the man would want to avoid him, but that had never been the MacNamara’s style.

The silence seemed to​ balloon between them, growing larger and larger. Beau could all but feel the man’s anger burning a hole through him. Finally, after he couldn’t pretend to be staring into his box any longer, Beau sighed and looked up, putting a hand to his collar reflexively, overly conscious of its presence. “Did you need something?” he asked dully, cheeks still hot.

Breathe, Daithi Breathe. 

Respect. 

You’re supposed to respect him. 

Daithi took a final deep breath and pushed himself from the doorframe before he entered the room and closed the distance between him and Beau. This was dangerous and he knew it. If something went wrong, if he did something stupid it would ruin everything they’d worked on. 

Not that it wasn’t already, but Daithi was willing to let it go. He just needed to know why. He didn’t understand. He thought they were getting better, that they were doing well and then this was thrown at him out of the blue with no warning. 

Reaching up, Daithi’s fingers found the leather of the collar that hung around Beau’s neck and he sighed, anger roaring to life when he touched the thing. “I don’t understand you,” he said, shaking his head back and forth. “You want to be treated equal and yet you let this man collar you like a dog. Like a pet, Beau. You let him own you like you’re worth nothing and for what? Huh? Why am I not good enough for you anymore?” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

taliesinmistry:

“Yes, explain. Are you deaf?” Taliesin was in no mood to put up with this. If he had to smack a bitch down (verbally, of course, did Taliesin look like he did fistfights), he was more than prepared to. He hated it when people smirked at him like that. The only people allowed to get away with it were family.

“I am not your sweetheart. I don’t care who gets upset, I get what I need, which is out of these shitty clothes and this shitty bed and onto the telephone to my father. Do you understand?” He looked down at Daithi. Even from a position beneath someone else, Taliesin could managed to look down. It was an upperclass thing. He pulled the shirt over his head. “What is this made from? Polyester?”

Oh boy. 

Daithi was in for a ride with this one. 

It was okay, he was prepared. In fact knocking little shits like this was one of his favorite things to do. “Go ahead and take your clothes off, sweetheart,” he said, because no matter what Taliesin wanted him to do, Daithi wasn’t about to bend just because the boy snapped his fingers. No no. That’s not how the tower worked and he was definitely about to make sure that their newest asset figured out his place. 

“I’ve got news for you. Once they’re off, you’re not getting any more. You’ll use what you’re given until you figure out a way to earn yourself more. Got it? You don’t get to be picky anymore, my dear.” Daithi took a few steps closer to the other, brows raised as he watched Taliesin.  “There’s not a part of me that isn’t itching to knock you down a few pegs so keep going. Keep digging yourself a hole.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

lochlanmcdevitt:

Lochlan had gotten distracted from work. He had plenty of it to do, but his focus was a little lacking these days, so he’d wandered off to do a little personal research instead.

Hence: the newspapers. Dozens of them, spread out across Daithi’s dining table. Everything in the news was greatly concerning these days, so Lochlan had set himself the task of solving it, scribbling on the open papers with differently colored pens. Articles were circled, equations jotted in the margins leading to conclusions only he understood, photos and faces scribbled out or highlighted, sections of text blocked out and letters in headlines underscored.

He was pretty sure he’d solved it: Donald Trump was a draconian lizard alien and he was brainwashing the masses through subliminal messaging in his tweets.

So deep in his theories, he barely heard Daithi enter the suite. He did hear a slam coming from the kitchen, though. Then, Daithi’s low growl, words he couldn’t quite make out – and the distinct sound of a fist hitting the counter top. Twice.

Alarmed, Lochlan poked his head into the kitchen. “Daithi, you–” Oh dear, the alcohol was out. “What happened? Is it an attack? Is it Bellamy? Is it the Illuminati? I told you to turn your phone off so they can’t spy on you!”

Had Daithi actually paid attention when he came in the door, he would have seen Lochlan sitting at the dinning room table, spread out and crazy, working over articles to prove yet another fucking insane theory about something or another. Lizard people or the CIA or who space monkies that live in the attic. Something strange. 

However, in his anger, Daithi had missed the man completely and now that he’d taken a second to get the brunt of his anger out, he turned to face Lochlan finally. “No,” he snapped, “No, Lochlan, it’s not the fucking Illuminati. They aren’t tracking me through my cell phone, they aren’t tracking you through your cell phone. You,” he emphasized his point by jabbing his finger in the other’s direction, “Where supposed to get back on your medication.” 

Fuck. 

He didn’t want to take his aggression out on Lochlan. It wasn’t fair to the asset and Daithi was supposed to be working on his anger as it was. However, this situation was testy and it was definitely working on his last god damn nerve. “Beau’s been claimed. And clearly it’s not by me. I’m tired. I’m angry. That’s it.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

Daithi was trying his fucking best to keep his calm. He’d managed not to freak out in eyes of the public, had managed to keep quiet as he rode the elevator back up to his suite. That had been the hardest part, the slow rise of the lift as it carried the steaming man higher and higher until finally the quiet little ding had Daithi’s left eye twitching. 

It would have been almost cartoonish had the man not been so fucking furious. His foot falls were heavy against the floor and he was sure he nearly broke the card scanner to get into his suite with how hard he slammed his key against it. 

The second the door opened though and he was locked safely away, his wallet went flying across the room, narrowly missing the large TV that was perched on the wall. Still, he didn’t say anything, just stormed into his kitchen in search of a drink, a very specific bottle of whiskey that he kept stashed away for exact moments like this. 

He pulled open the cabinet, eyes narrowing at the tiny bloop of the robot perched in it’s little dock, just daring it say something. It was lucky it remained quiet, regardless of it’s origin, or Daithi would have chucked the thing straight into the sink. 

His hands shook as he opened the bottle he’d pulled down, but he didn’t bother to pour a glass, just took a shot straight from the bottle before taking a few deep breaths and slamming it back onto the counter. He had no idea what to do at this point, his options lost on him as he tried to figure out a way to murder Ano as quietly as possible. Come to think about it, he didn’t care if it was quiet or not, just that it needed done. “What the FUCK were you thinking, Beau?!” he growled, fist connecting with the counter top, followed by another resounding smack from his palm as he tried to keep his anger in check. 

It was looking so good, and Daithi was positive if he didn’t find an outlet soon he was going to fucking spontaneously combust.

@lochlanmcdevitt

[taliesinmistry-deactivated20181]

Taliesin had been semi-conscious for the last half an hour. Whatever they’d forced down him on the plane must have been a sedative of some description, because he felt as if he were full of cotton wool. It was slowly working its way out of his system because Taliesin was processing enough to realise that he wasn’t in his lovely, soft, enormous bed in Paris, he was very much in a horrible, scratchy and very small bunk… Elsewhere.

“This isn’t my bed,” he grumbled, his words still slurred, though he was rapidly finding language again. He put a hand on his chest and felt- “This isn’t my shirt.” He shook his head, sitting up and rubbing a hand over his face. There we go, that was better. “Where am I? What are these rags?” He pulled at his shirt, displeasure spreading across his face. He looked up at the figure in front of him. “Explain.”

[fearless-renegade-blog]

“Explain, He says” Daithi smirked, lifted an eyebrow at the boy in front of him. He hated these ones. The self-entitled brats who thought they owned the world. They usually had money coming out of their ears and pennies to throw in whichever way they pleased so long as they got their way. However, that wasn’t the way of the tower, not unless you were Bellamy MacNamara yourself, but sadly, that wasn’t this poor kids case. 

“Welcome home, sweetheart. Don’t expect much here, got it? When you start demanding things, people get pissy. We don’t want anyone to get....too upset with you on your first day here, mm?” 

[caleb-roman]

Maybe it was a little bit strange, but even after almost fifteen years as a resident of the Tower, Beau still didn’t have that much stuff. He did have his little caches stashed in hiding places on different floors, and that was where all the really important things were kept, but here in his room in the Commons there wasn’t much of anything. So it wasn’t taking him long to pack it all up.

While he worked to place his few books and clothes into the box Ano had given him, Beau kept putting a hand to the pink leather collar that now hung around his neck, just touching it or occasionally turning it a little. It was soft but it still chafed his skin slightly, though that was only because it was new.

He glanced up when he heard a set of footsteps that seemed to stop in the doorway just a few feet away, looking for a moment like he’d been caught in the act. “Oh.. hey.”

[fearless-renegade-blog]

Interestingly enough, it didn’t take long for Daithi to catch wind of the news. 

That was a lie. 

There was nothing interesting about it and it was certainly no surprise that Daithi had found out as soon as Ezra Carson had. It paid to keep tabs on Beau, on what was going on with his training and the like but if the boy wanted to hide shit from him, well then the ‘progress’ they’d been working on would falter. 

They would back peddle and end up right where they started from the very beginning. 

This was not how the MacNamara had imagined this going but as he turned the corner, eyes watching Beau carefully as he packed his things, Daithi’s jaw clenched shut. “Oh hey,” he said, sucking in a breath and lifted an eyebrow. 

He avoided looking anywhere but the pink collar, the color screaming at the man and object belittling in itself. Didn’t Beau want to be respected? Didn’t he want someone to look at him as an equal, not a pet? Daithi didn’t say anything, not yet at least, he was still trying to control the anger that bubbled low in his belly. 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

bstrdxexecutioner:

It was nice to have a genuine hug. With Bellamy it was all business, what he’d done, what he owed, his plans. But Daithi just wanted him to stay and he could tell in the tight hold he was in. “I know.” he smiled as Daithi pulled back.

“I’ve missed ya too D, an’ Oshie, an’ even Bellamy.” he chuckled a little and patted Daithi on the shoulder “But don’t worry, ya my favorite uncle. It’s really good t’ be back. What have I missed?” 

God. 

What hadn’t Delaney missed. They’d gone through a culling, Daithi had been kidnapped and nearly killed, Bellamy had had a stroke, they’d finally ended the war with the D’Ignazio’s. There’d been so much that had gone in the boy’s absence that it was difficult to know where to start. 

“You’ll be here for a while with that question,” he laughed almost sheepishly, stepping away from the other before bringing his hand up to scratch at the back of his neck. 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

bstrdxexecutioner:

Delaney had been dreading having to see Bellamy for the first time in so long, his uncle had always been unpredictable, and he didn’t like being made to look like a fool, but when it came to Daithi, Del wasn’t worried. He expected a punch maybe, for leaving without a proper goodbye, and for not keeping in touch, but he knew Daithi would be the one glad to see him and willing to show it.

He smiled as his uncle moved around the desk and came over, cupping his face. “Texas, t’ get some cash an’ move abroad. Didn’t work out so well.” he chuckled and wrapped his arms around the other man, pulling Daithi in to a hug and grinning “Uncle B is goin’ t’ handle the evidence, Mav is takin’ care o’ the witnesses, in the mean time, I thought it best I stay low.” he smiled “It’s good to be back. Missed you D.” 

He let go slowly, standing back “Did ya like ya new bat? Like I’d forget ‘bout christmas.”

Texas. 

Jesus christ, Delaney had moved to fucking Texas. 

It didn’t matter now, not when the boy was back and standing in front of him, that familiar smile on his face. “Don’t worry, I’m sure everything will be fixed in no time,” he said, pulling back from the hug in order to get a good look at his nephew. It had been almost a year since he’d seen him and it was nice to have him back. 

Hopefully without incident, but knowing Delaney, that was unlikely. 

“I’m glad you’re back. Laying low or not, you’ve been missed, Del.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

invisibeau:

He wasn’t sure what Daithi would say to the monologue of self-loathing Beau had just thrown at him; he could only guess that it wouldn’t be good. He really believed in his heart that the man should hate him. But when Daithi finally did reply and the words weren’t confirmation of Beau’s stupidity but, again, those words Beau was always deep down desperate to hear. He looked up, startled and in more pained despair than ever, because never before had he felt less deserving of Daithi’s pride.

More tears welled rapidly in his eyes and he took in an unsteady breath while heblinked them back. Daithi’s opinion couldn’t be founded on anything rational. Maybe that wasn’t surprising given how his last few weeks had been spent.. because Beau had kept tabs on Daithi, even if he’d been careful never to cross the man’s path. Just hearing the rasp in Daithi’s voice right now gave Beau enough of an excuse to doubt his words. 

“You’re just saying that,” he said quietly, the corner of his mouth twitching like it wanted to pull up into a sad little smile. “.. I know I didn’t do you any favors by leaving. I just fucked everything up for both of us. Why be proud of that?”

Another quiet sigh left his lips and Daithi turned his blue eyes towards the boy’s face. “Listen to me,” he said, using that stern tone he usually reserved for difficult situations. His voice took on a serious tone, one that spoke volumes about what he was going to say, how honest his words were about to be, “Okay? Pay attention, because I’m not saying it again.” 

Everything that had happened between them from the beginning, Daithi killing Beau’s master, Daithi almost beating Beau to death, Daithi leaving again and again, Daithi being a fucking idiot....everything that had gone wrong in the past had been his fault and Beau had clearly grown tired of it. It had been enough to open the man’s eyes though, enough to drag his head out of his ass, and hopefully...maybe...they could do something about it. They could move on and be good, be happy if they wanted, but Daithi wasn’t going to force it if Beau did not want it. 

He took a deep breath and leaned both elbows on the table, fingers folding together before he started to speak again. “You did what you needed to. I wasn’t...I wasn’t giving you what he needed or what you wanted. I treated you like garbage, like you were just a pet and you’re more than that, Beau. Okay? You’re more than a fucking dog or an asset to me, more so than anyone else in this god damn place. You left because I wasn’t and I probably still am not good enough for you, but...” he stopped, glancing away for a moment to gather his thoughts. When he spoke again, his voice was soft, tender in a way it rarely ever was. “I love you, Beau and...and it took a long time, longer than it should have for me to be able to say that, but I do. And you....you leaving...I’m not...I’m not going to lie, it hurt. But it opened my eyes.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

lochlanmcdevitt:

As far as reassurances went, Lochlan didn’t find it to be particularly compelling. Daithi offered absolutely no objective proof.

But. On the other hand, he was Daithi Macnamara, and he was smart, and he’d presumably be smart enough to realize if the CIA had bugged his tower. The entry protocol for the tower was extremely rigorous, and Lochlan was sure it’d be very difficult for CIA to get in. So… maybe Daithi was right? Maybe nobody was listening and stealing and plotting?

“It’s not just you and I, it’s a whole building full of building,” he replied, pedantic to the end, but nonetheless relented a little, sagging a little where he stood. Daithi’s grip around his wrist was a nice little reminder of his physical presence – something that anchored him to reality and let him differentiate between Daithi and the geometric shapes crawling behind his eyelids.

It didn’t stop him from taking out his phone and tapping rapidly at it, one-handed, looking for any irregularities in the tower servers and wi-fi. “What would you do if there was CIA in the building?” he asked curiously.

Daithi watched Lochlan closely, trying to gauge his reaction should anything seem out of the ordinary. He didn’t want to scare the asset anymore than he already seemed to be, but he wasn’t entirely sure how to approach this topic without triggering any further...psychosis? 

The man sighed and brought a hand up to rub at his temple, lifting his shoulders in a shrug. “I dunno,” he said honestly. There were precautions set in stone for a such a situation, business as usual, operate as if the tower were just that, a simple tower, selling pharmaceuticals and whatever the general public demanded. “We’d do as we were taught. Go on like they weren’t here...yanno...minus the slave thing.”  

He took in another breath and dropped his arms by his sides, reaching out to run his fingertips over the other’s cheek, using his gentle touch to tilt Lochlan’s face towards his. “You need to go back on your medicine, Lochlan.” he said, pushing his tongue against his teeth. “I mean it.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

lochlanmcdevitt:

For a long moment, Lochlan looked downright lucid, wrinkling his nose in incredulity at Daithi’s attempts at reassuring him. “Daithi,” he said patiently, like he was speaking to a slow child, “the news man just said the CIA does that. The news doesn’t always lie!”

And with that, he was pulling himself out of Daithi’s grip, and pacing, typing frantically on his phone. “This tower would be a target,” he muttered to himself. “I already knew. They’ve got to be monitoring. They’d be stupid not to. If we get rid of all wi-fi enabled electronics, we can at least pull some of the wool over their eyes. Daithi! We’re going to inspect all the wi-fi chips in the building, right now.”

Okay. 

This was starting to get out of hand. 

Daithi had thought he could handle this, thought that Lochlan would have gotten back in the habit of taking his medication after the culling but it appeared the more time that passed, the less likely that was going to happen. He’d have to do something...and soon or else shit like this was going to keep happening and it was going to make Lochlan go even crazier than he was starting to. 

“Lochlan,” he tried again, reaching for the man’s wrist and taking it gently to pull the other back to him. “You need to listen to me, okay? Not to the man on the news.” Daithi took a deep breath, unsure of the best way to handle all of this. 

“There’s no one listening to us right now, okay? It’s just...you and I.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

invisibeau:

He stared at the little card, unable to wrap his mind around all that it implied. His body reacted before his brain could though, and the card on the table began to blur as tears filled Beau’s eyes. He didn’t deserve this. Not even close. He’d hurt Daithi so much; it was mortifying now to think how bad. How selfish Beau had been. How he’d looked Daithi in the face and heard the man say how proud he was of him, and then walked out anyway.

What did the card mean? Was he saying he wanted Beau to come back? Or was it really just what Daithi had said, a little way to escape from other people? Beau couldn’t imagine ever actually using it - the pain he felt right now would only get exponentially worse if he did - so instead he just focused on the offer itself. Why was Daithi doing it? Beau didn’t have an answer.

He reached out and took the card, folding it into his sleeve and gripping onto it like a talisman. “You should hate me,” he rasped softly, gazing down at the table as a teardrop slid to the end of his nose. “I were selfish an’ mean to you. I didn’t appreciate you. I.. I walked out, and threw myself at somebody else - and he didn’t want me and now I’m alone and I deserve to be an' you should hate me. I’m so stupid.”

Daithi hadn’t meant to make Beau cry. That hadn’t been his intention and seeing the tears form in the other’s eyes pulled at him and his desire to make all of Beau’s pain go away. They could forget what had happened, go back to how they were before. They could move on like nothing had ever been said and Beau hadn’t witnessed Daithi crying on the floor of kitchen while the asset gathered his things and left. They could do it. He knew they could. 

Except....a part of him didn’t want that. He didn’t want to forget what had been said and done. Daithi had meant every word. He was proud of Beau then and he still was right now, despite the fact that the boy looked about ready to collapse. The asset had done what was right for him. He’d stood up to the man, taken charge of what he wanted to do and didn’t stop himself, despite the fact that Daithi had tried very hard to make him stay. 

Whatever had gone on between them in that moment had change them for good, and they could grow from it. 

There wasn’t an ounce of Daithi that hated the boy in front of him and he didn’t think there ever would be. 

“Hey,” he said, his voice coming out raspier than he’d intended it to. “You didI what you needed to, sweetheart,” Daithi cleared his throat and tried again, “You’re not....you’re not stupid, Beau. Okay? You saw something that you wanted and you took it and...and jesus, I’m still so fucking proud of you for doing it...”

[fearless-renegade-blog]

druggedupira:

Ira took a drag of the cigarette as Daithi spoke, exhaling as he looked up at the other from his position sitting on the stair. After a moment, he looked back down, his hands shaking again. “My legs gave out coming down from the lab. I missed lunch today because of work, and I was with Dreifuss in the morgue overnight and into this morning. I haven’t eaten in maybe twenty hours, I haven’t slept because caffeine was injected directly into my bloodstream, and I stopped feeling my fingers six hours ago. So excuse me, sir, if I chose to light my cigarette a few floors away from the courtyard.”

Daithi didn’t sympathize. He rarely did when it came to the assets in the tower. There were a few, of course, that he would cater to, spoil when he wanted, but Ira was not one of them. If the boy wanted to spew excuses at him, he’d listen. Did he care? Probably not, but he could put on a front and pretend to give a shit while the boy was talking. It didn’t last long though, not when that slight hint of attitude hit the asset’s tone and Daithi let one of his smirks pull over his lips. “Oh yeah?” he asked, tilting his head to the side. “That’s a sad story, sweetheart. Too bad I don’t give a shit.”

Daithi turned so he could walk down the flight of stairs that would lead him to Ira, the sound of his sneakers echoing off of the concrete stairs as he made his down. “Get up.” he demanded, gesturing for the boy to do so. 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

invisibeau:

He listened in silence to the progress of those footsteps, noting their slowness, the hesitation.. it made him curious, but not enough to make him lift his head and see who it was. He was still clinging to the hope that they’d continue on past his table. Then he heard the chair across from him drag against the floor. There was something touching his leg, and finally Beau scraped together the energy to turn his head and stare into Daithi’s eyes.

No. If there was anyone he didn’t feel up to seeing right now..

Regret and pain washed over him and Beau shrank back a little in his seat, tempted to pull the hood of his sweatshirt up to hide himself from sight completely. The silence that stretched between them seemed full of reproach, all directed at Beau. Never before had he been so aware of what a good thing he’d had with Daithi. It hadn’t been perfect, sure, but he’d been loved at least. Maybe not always in the kind of way he wanted to be, but he’d still had something good and now everything just.. hurt. So much.

“Hi,” he mouthed after a while, too anxious and unhappy to say much more. If Daithi was here to gloat, Beau wouldn’t have blamed him at all.

Daithi watched the boy carefully, eyes never leaving the other’s frame as he shrank back even further into himself. Beau looked smaller than ever, and the MacNamara wanted to reach out and fix that. He wanted to take the pain away from him in any way he could, but he didn’t want to seem intrusive. Beau had left for a reason and Daithi didn’t want to push boundaries, if there even were any, and make the boy even more uncomfortable than he already was. 

“Hi,” he said in response, his eyes softening as he once again, tapped the toe of his shoe against the asset’s ankle. What did he say next? Did he ask how Beau was doing? Did he get up and walk away? What was the proper etiquette in situations like this? Ones that were loaded with palpable tension and no real way to make it disappear. 

Without really thinking about his next move, Daithi reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, laying his own card key down on the table. It wasn’t the the one he’d given Beau months prior, but the one he’d kept with him since they’d moved into the new tower. There were of course, extra’s upstairs in Lochlan’s desk, but Daithi didn’t have the time to go up and grab one, so this would do. “In case you need to get away from people.” 

[fearless-renegade-blog]

i-am-not-marlowe:

Salinger looked entirely unphased by the whole thing. “That’s… not at all an answer to the question I asked you,” he sad as he reached for the handle himself and pulled the door open eventually. “You sound like a villain from a bad horror movie.”

“I am a villain from a bad horror movie,” he said in response, lifting his shoulders up in a shrug as he watched Salinger struggle to open the door. He’d never seen the boy so...intoxicated before. It was usually the other twin that was fucked up in some sort of way. “You look like you’re having a hard time there. Fun night?”