and CHAD @fearofthev0id - Tumblr Blog

Me to other people: so the torture tango does show homoeroticism, but it’s in the regard of parody and making fun of spy movies as a whole. It also holds a lot of foreshadowing in reference to Curt and Owen’s relationship and the story as a whole

Me on here: yeah so they should’ve fucked nasty there tbh

not-sure-what-im-feeling

Me when I'm asked what I'm listening to: just a musical, you know me haha

Me talking about listening to torture tango on loop: no no no because the implications of Owen stalking curt when he talks about "waiting for this moment", coupled with other lines throughout the show (both Owen's and otherwise) make me lose it. Because Owen cared enough to hurt curt, in a way that we see very differently from the opening torture scene in act one part one. It's personal, and hateful, and curt is actually being hurt (with lasting damage like his tooth being taken out) (speaking of that tooth, whaddya think Owen, might do with it? Toss it? Keep it?) And at the start of it, he's saying that he'll keep curt in his "carry on luggage" like bro you're gonna keep him? The body of your former lover physically symbolizing your need to keep him with you but your inability to love him alive? The guy who you can no longer stand but still love in such a hateful way, and hate in such a loving way? Do you think Owen is sickened by his own love for curt? He clearly still cares about him, even if most loving feelings have turned into hateful ones, caring about him so much he'll hurt him broooo. I can't even handle this anymore holy shot I need them to fuck in the most painful way where it's full of hate and love and bitterness and softness

murraysiskind-deactivated202511

It’s so crazy that suicide prevention is just people going awwww don’t!! Awwww come on noooooooooo stopppppp

allhailklisz

yokelfelonking

One of the best ones I saw was a thing noting that every single one of the few survivors of suicide jumps off of the Golden Gate Bridge realized, on the way down, that the problems they were killing themselves over actually were fixable or could be worked through...except for the now - extremely unfixable - problem of gravity.

authortobenamedlater

Went to the Holocaust Museum in DC once. There was a video interview of an Auschwitz survivor who said he and some other prisoners stayed up all night with a man who wanted to kill himself. The man didn’t kill himself and survived to liberation.

In the video the survivor said “Never seek a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And they’re all temporary problems.”

Hearing that from a guy who survived the Holocaust rewired my brain a little bit.

drgrlfriend

I think something a lot of people don't understand is that depression is not suicidality, and suicidality is not depression. People can, and are, depressed without being suicidal, and sometimes suicidality peaks as people are emerging from depression. Suicidality is a wave, and the trick is to allow that wave to crest and subside WITHOUT acting on it. Whatever it takes to ride it out. For some people that's distraction, like watching television. For others it's calling a friend -- not to talk about the suicidality, but just to talk. For others it could be as simple as going to sit in a coffee shop or library, because the presence of other people is a huge diminisher of suicide risk. That's what suicide safety planning is about. It's like having any other type of emergency plan, like a plan for fire or evacuation. It's making a plan when you are in the frame of mind to do so, so that you can just DO the plan without having to think about it when the occasion arises. When you're in the midst of suicidal ideation, or even intent, you're not in a problem-solving mood. So knowing past!you, with the help of a therapist hopefully, came up with the plan and all you have to do is follow up until the wave crests and subsides, is what allows you to see another day.

ETA: Here's a link to a safety plan. https://www.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/988-safety-plan.pdf

asterriterri

This is literally the plot of Spies are Forever

trashpidgeon48

Leitmotifs drive me insane, like I hear *repeated melody that has an association with a person, idea, or situation* and I go *tears up the fucking rug like a dog*

bumblingest-bee

oh so when other people say "eat the rich" it's a rallying cry for the working class, but when i, sweeney todd,

deersgutss

But when I saw her???? Laid out like a queen????? She was the happiest corpse???? I'd ever seen???

skys-archive

Some thoughts I had on the emcee in cabaret (this is copied and pasted from a discord chat from like. Idk a month ago maybe)

winds-of-zephyr416

“Sauron is a loyal Maia” factoid actualy just statistical error. average Sauron betrays several people per year. Morgoth Georg, who lives in a cave & gets 99.99 percent of Sauron’s loyalty each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.

ilariel

Brush test with the dark lords ever

mai-komagata

so here is my melkor hot take of the day. i dont think melkor is more evil than sauron.

like yes, tolkien said sauron is less evil than melkor bc he is devoted and obedient to him, i.e. catholic theological legalese, since love and obedience are the catholic virtue things that dont originate from evil. cool. ASIDE FROM THAT.

and like, melkor is totally MORE POWERFUL than sauron by like orders of magnitude. sure. melkor is the evil soup that suffuses the world like original sin and the fall do in catholic theology.

but like if in looking at intent and what they do, i dont think you can say that for sauron's relative power, i hesitate to say he is more evil, but he is evil in a more insidious and dangerous way common to our age.

like i see melkor very much representing the evil of the natural world (and to some degree part of the universal plan of eru iluvatar). he is volcanoes. he is the blight of winter. he is disease and pestilence and decay. he is the coming of darkness, the destruction of creation. the entropy of the universe. he desires the spark or life but can only subdivide endlessly like bacteria.

but that is part of the fallen world in theological terms even if it shouldn't be part of a healed world of immortal quasi spiritual (or actually spiritual) beings. it is imperfection if the goal is deathlessness. but it is part of the world.

and to a degree i see valar as having this sort of impersonal force of nature quality about them. not just melkor. they all do. tolkien describes them like heavenly bureaucrats. they arent tied to the world and dont understand the world in a tangible personal way that even the maiar do.

sauron is different and i think there is a reason sauron is the villain in the books in the second and third age and specifically in the main book he published. he is the evil of our modern world.

because most mythologies dont have two dark lords. one representing chaos and destruction and one representing order and coercion and industry.

it represents a fundamental swing in how cultures started to conceptualize evil. we mastered science and thus a lot of the things that were a curse from the gods were being solved. and yet. the world wasn't becoming less evil. we still want to control each other, to subjugate others. we want to tame nature so much it kills her and makes her barren. we covet power because we are afraid of the lack of it.

so yeah. sauron and melkor are both evil. but sauron was subject to melkor (or natural evils) until we subdued and chained him. and then sauron's evils were dominant.

(is this character analysis or fictional theology? idk.)

i love these characters because they are symbolic of how we conceptualize evil in the world, as well as being stand-ins for a certain character archetype. i dont have to write them just as them being evil. but they are great for writing about difficult subjects because of their symbolic nature.

(and maybe like sauron i too love volcanoes and snow and mushrooms and thus am a bit enchanted with the force of nature that is melkor. i used to study a LOT of catholic theology, and now as an outsider looking in im like, maybe i can play with these myths and tropes. at the same time, the ultimate plan of eru iluvatar is meant to be a mystery.)