THIS POST DOES CONTAIN TRIGGERS!
Hello people of Tumblr. I’ve been debating whether to make this post for a while now, and tbh, I feel I kinda need to.
Since 2010, (13 years old), I’ve been battling with mental health issues, they’re a complete and utter bitch. They stick around even when you thought they’d left ages ago, and come back and bite down hard. Anyway, as of the start of last summer (April/May 2015) I stopped self harming! Whoo! Haha, that was a pretty big deal for me, seen as I’d try to end my life multiple times and my arm is still badly scarred.
HOWEVER, I am still here today. I’m still enjoying life, it has it’s up’s and down’s, but that’s life. It’s a roller coaster. I’m aiming this post mainly at those who are currently struggling with mental health issues, even those who don’t, this can still be a useful insight. When I stopped self harming, I felt better, it was like someone had lifted the wool from over my eyes. Apart from that wool was irritable, horrid, weighty, cold, and just plain dull. It really did feel like the colour had been pumped back into the world. Keep in mind this wasn’t an overnight change, this was over the course of several months, keeping a positive outlook, and keeping myself productive. You can make yourself better, but only you can be the one to bring about these changes.
I’m now 19 years old, 6 years down the line. I’ve had several careers, been travelling around country and been abroad on a few occasions. I’ve seen some incredible things, and experienced some life changing situations. I’ve met the best people in the world in the last 2 years of my life alone, people who I intend to keep in my life until the end. They are the closest people to me, and have been with me in both the worst and best parts of my life. I wouldn’t and can’t wish for better friends, I love you all.
The point I’m trying to convey here is; No matter how bad, no matter how dark, no matter how fucked up your life seems to be.
DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE GIVE UP!!! Okay?
Because one day things will get better, things will lighten up once more, and I guarantee that someone somewhere will see a smile on your face in years to come. Don’t think just because everything is coming crashing down on you that there isn’t a way out. There is, and that way out is you.
Sorry if I went on a tangent, but I’d like to think that this post has made a point, and has maybe, just maybe helped someone or some people out there to reflect on themselves, and realise that they can be happy, and that they can and will live exciting and fulfilling lives!
To anyone who ever helped me through anything, anyone who’s supported me, and anyone who’s kicked me in the ass and said “you’re fucking better than this”. I thank you, without people like you, I wouldn’t be here today.
Big shout out to Beren Alderidge, who was my private psychiatrist for 2/3 years, you became one of my best friends.
Peace out all, life does get better. Thank you for reading.
Ben.
Proud of you Ben
Thanks dude! c:
My best friend is as much an inspiration as he is a hero and a sign to keep going. Life gets better, so too will you.
