Feel the Thunder

|Left to right: Mori-1 Atlas-0 Kaiyo-1| Not very active | No multiship soz | Armour refs will be tagged as #armour |

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol groans, perhaps a bit more exaggerated than need be, as he slides on behind Atlas, locking his long limbs onto the Titan. It’s uncomfortable being pressed so close to an exo with hard parts digging into the soft parts of his own body - maybe this is why Shiloh wears enough layers to make them feel like a piece of furniture with child safe paddings on every edge.

“Yes, please, let’s go.”

The previously chilly wind is almost cutting as they race through the streets, thankfully mostly free of other vehicles. He presses his face against Atlas’ shoulder blades, hoping the living wind shield in front of him will keep his nose and ears from freezing.

“I’m amazed helmets aren’t mandatory.”

He’s trying not to yell, but it’s not easy to be heard over both the roar of the engine and the whipping winds around them.

“You’d think City folk would get tired of having to scrape Guardian brain matter off of asphalt every other week when they forget brakes exist.”

- “Actually thank god they don’t make helmets mandatory, I wouldn’t be able to see shit out of one.”

Civilian definitions of helmets were so funny, the things were good for impact absorption definitely but they weren’t much good against anything else in the Solar system, not to mention how they mess with his sonar.

“Plus how else would you be able to appreciate the view properly?” 

Being an exo Atlas does forget that humans, unlike machines have eyes that dry up and irritate surprisingly easily, and being a unique model he doesn’t even have to take his vision off the road to broaden his range and look at everything else. Although the comment about Guardians ramming their vehicles (and themselves) against other obstacles does make him refocus his sight again.

“To be fair, not all of us have brains.”

It was a terrible joke but it doesn’t stop the shit eating grin from taking over his lips when his Ghost sighs loud enough for their passenger to hear.

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol curses Bongji under his breath, hoping it can feel his intentions through their “bond”. (Or whatever it is everyone else seems to claim a Guardian and their Ghost is supposed to have. Sounds fake.)

So, either he walks all the way to the other side of the City - which, even with his stamina and high quality prosthetics, is exhausting - or he asks Atlas to give him a ride, which will likely involve him having to press himself against the Titan and hang on for dear life as they race down the road. Neither options are great, but at least the latter will be painful for a shorter period of time.

He gives Atlas an uncomfortable look, shuffling his feet like he’s a teenager scared to admit to his parents that he just accidently dropped a family heirloom on the dog’s head.

Wait no, that was more appropriate for when they were still in the restaurant.

Right now, he feels more like a teenager trying to swallow his pride so he can ask his mother to drive him to the theaters, knowing fully that she will embarrass the hell out of him in front of his friends with her over-affectionate teasing.

“Come on, man. Don’t make me say it.”

-

“Don’t make you say what?”

Atlas looked as smug as a faceless exo could look, the emotion radiating off his body language, he rarely ever got an edge over the other Guardian, Cheonhyeol was always 3 steps ahead of him in anything and although a very rare and entertaining scene he still feels bad for him so he quickly drops the tease.

“Alright alright, just climb on, behind me preferably, I won’t be able to see anything past your tall frame if you sit in front of me.”

Turning to face him he pats the space behind him, thankfully Cheonhyeol was such a beanpole, he should be able to fit relatively comfortably in one seat, much like Shiloh did during their first patrol together.

“Let’s go!”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol chuckles. He would make a quip back if he was in the right headspace for it. Atlas was already joking with him again, like everything was okay. Shit, what did he ever do to deserve a friend like that?

He didn’t. Which is why he had to do better.

He summons Ghost, who stares at him blankly. He gestures to Atlas with his sparrow, hoping it would get the hint, but Bongji simply lets out a sound that may be a imitation of a yawn before disappearing again.

Really?

He slowly looks over to Atlas, too embarrassed to suggest what’s on his mind as he realizes his Ghost will not be providing him with his own sparrow. He’s torn between hoping the Titan will shrug and tell him to meet him there, and hoping he’ll ask the question first so Cheonhyeol doesn’t have to.

-

Atlas was eager to leave the alley, as if physically walking away from that place was like leaving all their problems behind, if only it were really that easy. Stepping onto the curb he was so focused on checking the dials on his Sparrow that he misses the embarrassed glance Cheonhyeol sends his way, silently asking for help. 

Swinging his leg over the seat of his own ride he only realizes something was off when there was no sound of the other Sparrow transmatting in and that Cheonhyeol looks like he wanted to disappear into thin air. The exo would raise an eyebrow if he could so he settles with a head tilt.

“Transmat not working for you?”

That shouldn’t be an issue, they were in the middle of the City, transmat ranges covered almost every area in here, was his Ghost being ornery again? He knows Cheon doesn’t exactly have the highest opinion of his companion.

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol lets out a shaky laugh. His voice is still a bit watery, with a slight rasp from straining to keep his crying as quiet as he could.

“Dude, at least your ass can still feel.”

He slowly gets up with a soft grunt, stretching his back and loosening the joints that were frozen stiff. He can still feel the ghost of a touch lingering on his scalp where Atlas brushed his hair. It’s… not unpleasant, to his surprise.

Patting his slacks to dust them off, he spares one last moment to pull at the wrinkles on his dress shirt before meeting “eyes” with Atlas.

“Thanks.”

For coming here. For listening to him. For not hating him. For still being his friend.

-

Cloud is still confused at the actions of the other Ghost, blinking away in his pocket. They’re still worried about letting their Guardian go anywhere with Cheonhyeol but they can sense that he wasn’t lying, and they think being able to hang out with Shiloh might be good for Atlas. 

“Hmm maybe it’s because you have no ass to sit on.”

Well to be fair the Hunter wasn’t all that flat and he almost regrets letting that quip slip, was it still too early to joke? He feels worse immediately after hearing Cheonhyeol thank him, but for what? He has done nothing but ruin dinner, yell at him then comfort him, nothing really worth celebrating. 

“It’s what I should have done earlier, so I guess there’s no better time than the present?”

With a nudge at his Ghost the Titan brings out his Sparrow again with a courtsey.

“So shall we?”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Bongji blinks and scoots closer to Cloud, letting out a noise that may be comparable to a tiny, high pitched faulty printer quietly trying and failing to push out a piece of paper. It leans over to bump its shell into theirs before quickly retreating, not giving the other Ghost a chance to react. If one was able to read the expressions of Ghosts, they may notice the very smug look it had as it hid itself away once more.

Cheonhyeol, meanwhile, is swallowing his pride to let Atlas run his fingers through his hair. It is a relaxing, yet embarrassing ordeal. The tightness in his throat eases up, and his vision clears as his breathing evens out again.

“I’m… going to go home…. clean up, and… see if Shiloh is ready to talk to me again.”

Last he checked, they were still in the closet alongside the armful of blankets they had dragged in with them before he could even explain himself.

“Would it be selfish if I asked you to come with me as emotional support?”

-

Cloud only blinks rapidly, confused about the intentions and actions of the other Ghost, whirling their shell once they float out from behind their Guardian’s back to sneak into the pockets of the jacket instead, snuggling down there, still watching the Hunter carefully in case he tried to do anything with their Guardian.

They watch as he slowly untenses, curling against their Guardian as his shaking and sniffling slowly recedes, Atlas’ hands never stops, continuing to brush carefully through his hair, sorting out any tangles that have formed during the dinner and the trek here.

“I’d love to come along, I miss them too.”

Brushing some of the hair out of Cheon’s face Atlas lets his hands linger for a moment, a genuine smile on his face before pulling them back to push against the floor, getting him back to a standing position.

“Should we get going? My ass hurts sitting on the floor.”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

No, no, no no no no.

He didn’t mean for this to become a pity party. This was the story of a selfish idiot who wanted to feel better about himself by telling a horrible truth, only to lose what remained of his friends. He had been ready for contempt, for anger, for fear and disgust.

He wasn’t supposed to be pitied.

He had done nothing to earn it.

Whatever sound of protest he attempted to make is morphed into a choked sob by the time it leaves him.

Atlas did nothing wrong. He had no way of knowing what was going on then, and he reacted in an understanable way for someone with his trauma. He shouldn’t be apologizing.

Cheonhyeol leans into the Titan, burying his face into the man holding him, wishing that he could tell him all of that without having to talk.

He just barely misses Bongji show up and float up towards Cloud, its green optic brighter than before, shell twitching in anticipation.

-

He doesn’t know what to say to comfort the distraught Hunter besides hold him closer as he cried into his shirt, Cloud cheeps loudly, startled before darting to hide behind their Guardian where they whirr about worriedly. They didn’t trust him, not one bit, they could feel the genuine concern and love their Guardian had for him but that doesn’t mean they enjoyed it, not one bit!!!

Even when the Hunter’s Ghost floating up to them they only scooch further back into their Guardian’s jacket, staring at the black and green Ghost worriedly. Eventually they wiggle out of their little corner to blink slowly at the other Ghost.

Now with his other hand free Atlas uses it to brush carefully through Cheonhyeol’s once immaculate hair, he knows Mori used to do it for him, and Sunny seems to really enjoy it when she does it to them too. 

“What’re you going to do now?”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

The touch is almost scalding, like a fork in an open socket or a glowing hot pan, yet he can’t bring himself to pull away. He grasps onto the hand that was offered to him like it’s a lifeline, a rope in a storm - it may not be pulling him out, but it was keeping him from drowning.

The pressure that has been building in the back of his eyes releases in the form of tears, which Cheonhyeol attempts to hide by looking away from Atlas. As long as he doesn’t try to rub them away before he washes his face, there will be no trace of them.

He feels like he should say something. Thank him. Apologize to him. Anything. But he’s afraid that if he opens his mouth, he’ll choke on his own words. It’s shameful enough that he’s crying in a dingy alleyway after admitting to murder like he’s trying to garner sympathy. He doesn’t want Atlas to know.

Shit. He really hopes Atlas is bad at reading body language.

-

He was horrible yes, but he wasn’t fucking terrible at it. It wasn’t hard to miss the trembling in the hand he was holding, temperature spiking as the Hunter sniffled quietly, too soft for a human to hear, but not for an exo whose whole gimmick relied on sonar. 

“i’m sorry I guess, for reacting the way I did, for not being there when you needed help.”

Sitting up straight despite Cloud’s protests, Atlas turns to him, never letting go of his hand while doing his best to wrap his other hand around the lanky Hunter, not that it was hard, he was very small compared to him.

“I’m sorry Cheonhyeol.”

Man, shits fucked.

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam He can’t quite make out Atlas’ Ghost from where he is seated, but he can hear him mutter what he assumes are reassurances. The thought of Cloud being scared of him evokes both guilt and slight frustration. He would never gravely harm a Ghost. That was one line he would never cross. Or so he tells himself. He never thought he’d torture someone to death, either. Who knows what the fuck else he’d be willing to do. Cheonhyeol mirrors Atlas, tilting his head back till it rests on the wall. The sky is dark, but no stars are visible through the narrow crack between buildings. The tips of his fingers feel numb from the cold, yet they remain steady. “Atlas.” The name comes out as a whisper. “Are we still friends?” He doesn’t even know why he’s asking. If he says no, he… well, Cheonhyeol doesn’t even know how he’ll respond to that. He doesn’t know how he ended up growing so attached to Atlas. The thought of him leaving is what sends a chill down his spine for the first time since he left the restaurant. Is this what will break him? After everything else that happened, will losing a man who took forever for him to consider a friend be the final straw?

-

Were they?

What even constitutes as friends, people you meet up with once every few months, only to leave them and fly off planet for a few months, returning only to a deathly confession?

Atlas hasn't exactly been a good friend to him either so can he really blame Cheon for asking this question?

He knows the most logical answer was that no, he shouldn't be friends with someone like this, and yet the thought of abandoning the Hunter to his fate causes his chest to clench painfully. He might have made huge mistakes but who doesn't.

A friend would be there for him.

Reaching out with his free hand that wasn't petting his Ghost, the Titan takes Cheon's hand in his again, loosely in case he wanted to pull away.

"Yeah."

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Trial?

The thought of repeating the process of confessing his crimes, this time to a room full of people ready to judge him, to judge those who aided him in covering it up, makes the inside of his mouth taste sour. He shakes his head, fighting off the nausea building up in his throat.

As for the other option…

“They do. I told them.”

Hatch seemed… curious of their past, but no more than that. There was no obsession in their eyes to reclaim what was once theirs, to recover their memories and research. Just a desire to understand why they had done what they had done.

Somehow, that made him feel worse.

Hatch had very little to say about the matter, as it turned out. All they wanted was access to their old home, which was a bit of a legal nightmare, but doable. Cheonhyeol had spent weeks watching for a sign that they were plotting something, laying in wait for the right time to strike back at him. To get their revenge, like he got his.

There were no such signs, as far as he could tell.

“I wish they were angry at me - like you are. That would make it… easier.”

-

“Oh you bet your ass I would kick yours if you tried to reset me.”

Maybe Cheon would be able to catch him by surprise, Hunters were infamous for being notoriously hard to keep track of, but he doubts the lanky human could overpower him in any way, his arms were half the size of his unless he had powerful leverage over him. But what does he even have as leverage?

In his jacket Cloud shifts subtly, clearly still frightened of the Hunter. Raising both his hands he cups them gently over his jittery companion, whispering softly under his breath.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

Stroking their shell he turns to face his, friend, again. 

“Well you did clear things up with the victim at least, that’s the best thing you can do now.”

Letting his head fall back to bump against the concrete with a clack he sighs again.

“What’s done is done, and nothing’s gonna change.”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

He flinches when the fist is raised, but eases up when Atlas simply gives him a light tap (or what constitutes as a light tap for a Titan).

He doesn’t respond verbally at the question, but the panicked look on his face would be enough of an answer if one could see him.

Cheonhyeol had loosened his metaphorical grip on Hatch since that day on his ship after they had snuck out to the Moon of all places. No more did he stalk them throughout the Tower and follow them out on the field. He had moved onto tracking them through implanted devices, alongside watching them through the City’s security system. It was distressingly easy to slip in and out without a trace, carefully tracing their steps from a park to a public library to a café, where he saw them interact with Shiloh and Atlas.

Cheonhyeol had thought he was going to have a heart attack when Shiloh waved the total stranger over to their table. He nearly did have one when the three met again days later in the Tower by the vaults.

“I didn’t mean for any of this.”

How could he have known that his impulsive hunt all those months ago would have resulted in this? He was juggling secrets, desperately trying not to drop any in the fear of being exposed of both his crimes, and those of the people that he, inexplicably, still very much cared about.

There is a pressure building up behind his eyes. Heat wells, and he forces his breathing to stay calm. It’s cold. He’s fucked up spectacularly, and he’s cold. His vision blurs for a moment, but he manages to blink it away.

“I don’t know how to deal with any of this.”

He’s even been lying to himself. He didn’t decide to tell the truth because he thought his friends deserved to know. He’s telling them because he doesn’t know how to deal with the consequences of his own actions and needs help. Turns out Atlas was right about him being an idiot. He was dumb enough to be fooled by himself.

“I… I don’t know what to do anymore.”

Selfish. Utterly selfish.

-

Atlas isn’t great with human expressions, sure it’s ironic how they usually have so much more tells than exos but he still couldn’t understand all the subtle tensing or flinching, it definitely does not help that Cheonhyeol was never an easy person to understand. 

There was always the option to just stand up and walk away, wash his hands of this mess and leave the Hunter to lie on the bed he made himself, tempting as it sounds his own joints remained locked, vocaliser crackling softly before silencing again. 

He still wants to yell at him for being an idiot, for not thinking things through before going ahead with something so drastic, wants to blame him for everything he did himself, but he was sure Cheon has already went through all that on his own and more, so no point beating him anymore while he was already down.

“I don’t think anyone could know how to deal with this. It’s not like a prank or just a harmless kill on the field. This is someone, gone forever.”

There was no bringing anyone back as hard as they tried, even Osiris tried and he barely succeeded.

“You... you could go on trial, or bring them to someone who helps exos reset to... fix any lasting damages you might have left on them.” 

He wasn’t sure if there was a way, everyone he’s met barely remembers their past self anyways and had to resort to other measures to remember, through journaling or recordings. Especially for someone as old to go beyond 5 resets.

“Do they know?”

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

It hurts.

It hurts to hear those words coming from him. To know he has let him down, that he is on the verge of giving up on him. To know how much this has hurt Atlas himself.

He still cares. He swears he still cares. He can’t be a sociopath. He’s… he’s just trying to figure out how to explain without giving away too much.

“I’m… not the only one involved in this mess.”

Just admitting that feels like he’s endangering the others, even if two of them probably couldn’t care less if he died. He still cares. He swears he still cares.

“If it was just me on the line here, I would have told you everything already, I promise.”

Was he somehow proving he wasn’t a terrible person by potentially throwing the others under the bus? Is that how this was playing out?

Cheonhyeol feels the joints of his legs gently creak as he slides down to join Atlas on the cold ground. The evening air is freezing, yet he doesn’t seem to be shivering. A perk of attuning oneself to Void, he learned a while ago. He wants to make things right, but he doesn’t know how. He’s trying. He swears, he’s trying. He just… keeps doing it wrong.

-

Atlas can feel his Ghost hurriedly shift from one side underneath his jacket to the other in an attempt to hide away from the other Guardian when Cheonhyeol slides down next to him with a soft thump. The Titan himself would've flinched if he wasn't feeling so tired himself.

Who else could possibly be involved? Is it one of the mystery people Shiloh has mentioned seeing Cheonhyeol hang out with?

Somehow the thought that the Hunter would trust someone else over them to commit such an act hurts and he immediately feels incredulous for feeling that way. Why the fuck would he want to be involved in a forced reset?

Raising a hand again he punches the Guardian next to him, without any intention to hurt.

"You're a fucking idiot, I hope you know that."

Then after another beat, he pipes up softly.

"It's Hatch isn't it."

It would be the most logical option, the only other exo Shiloh has seen hanging out with Cheon and from what Mori told him he knew they were reset similarly to her.

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas’ inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender’s username is not one registered in his friends list, but it’s not difficult to guess who ‘cheonhyeol@citynet’ is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol realizes a bit too late that he misspoke. He knows he sounds callous. He sounds uncaring. But he doesn’t know how to convince Atlas that he does care, that he has been plagued by the thoughts of his choice that day. If he started crying, would it make it look genuine enough? Could he even cry right now, if he willed himself to?

He couldn’t tell him too much. As blunt as Atlas was, the man was stubborn. The last thing Cheonhyeol wanted was for the Titan to put the pieces together, drag himself into this tangled mess that was just barely staying out of the field of view of much deadlier forces.

He would have to be honest as he can without giving away details. Nothing that could be dug into for more information, nothing that could clue him into who else was involved.

“They were dangerous.”

But that wasn’t why he killed them. Their research, while wading in a dangerous field, was almost harmless compared to the atrocities many others had committed in the pursuit of knowledge. They would have become a non-threat to be forgotten in a few decades.

“But… it wasn’t about stopping them.”

He didn’t do it out of some sense of justice. He wasn’t that heroic. It was personal. Raw. Emotional. He wanted to tear them apart, destroy them and let someone else take up the space they had been in before.

“I was… angry.”

He killed them because they tried to kill Fatal.

-

Man Cheon drives him crazy.

He hates this so much, he hates how easily he gives up on this, how just because his friend told him the victim was dangerous that surely this meant what he did wasn’t as heinous, even when there was no proof, no information besides everything the Hunter was telling him. And for all he knows he could be lying to him, again.

“Why. Why didn’t you start with that so we could have avoided all this-”

Gesturing listlessly at the alleyway around them Atlas mumbles half heartedly.

“… this.”

This time he leans back against a wall and allows himself to slowly sink down onto the floor, pinching the front of his cranium again.

“Do you regret it?”

[fireteam-fireteam]

Cheonhyeol was terrible with words. His sentences were always either too vague or too long winded, unnecessarily complicated and empty, repetitive. That was why he had practiced so much before his dinner with Atlas. He had plans. He had a script.

Not that any of that mattered anymore.

He stares down at the man who, just a minute ago, looked like he was ready to lunge at him. It feels wrong, seeing him hunched over on the cold ground. Cheonhyeol is torn between being relieved that he is no longer outwardly hostile, and being worried about what must be going on in the Titan’s head.

“I…”

Does he regret what he did? It was exhausting, messy, and still hangs over him to this day. He has become the guardian of a Guardian, guiding them through a field of landmines. He has not known a day of peace since that day. He’s been avoiding Fatal for months out of shame. Mabii hates him but can’t even say it. Most people within Sunny’s social radius are wary of him.

“I don’t.”

There was an inexplicable thrill that made him nauseous to recall. The steady climb of adrenaline as he tracked them down, the burst of energy in his exhausted body as he struck first, the high of overpowering them, pinning them down, and undoing them.

It had been exhilarating.

“But… for what it’s worth, if I could go back to that moment, I would let them go.”

If only so he could return to something reassembling normality.

“I don’t know what that says about me.”

[fireteam-kaminari]

"Cheonhyeol will you ever give me a straight answer in your entire life."

Thankfully he was too drained to feel hysterical at the moment even if his mind was. He wants an excuse, any excuse to justify him forgiving his friend for what is supposed to be a heinous crime but Cheonhyeol seems intent on making life as hard as possible for them both.

No remorse at all huh?

"Well I think that says that you're a textbook definition of a sociopath, and that you really fucking need help, sorely."

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol realizes a bit too late that he misspoke. He knows he sounds callous. He sounds uncaring. But he doesn’t know how to convince Atlas that he does care, that he has been plagued by the thoughts of his choice that day. If he started crying, would it make it look genuine enough? Could he even cry right now, if he willed himself to?

He couldn’t tell him too much. As blunt as Atlas was, the man was stubborn. The last thing Cheonhyeol wanted was for the Titan to put the pieces together, drag himself into this tangled mess that was just barely staying out of the field of view of much deadlier forces.

He would have to be honest as he can without giving away details. Nothing that could be dug into for more information, nothing that could clue him into who else was involved.

“They were dangerous.”

But that wasn’t why he killed them. Their research, while wading in a dangerous field, was almost harmless compared to the atrocities many others had committed in the pursuit of knowledge. They would have become a non-threat to be forgotten in a few decades.

“But… it wasn’t about stopping them.”

He didn’t do it out of some sense of justice. He wasn’t that heroic. It was personal. Raw. Emotional. He wanted to tear them apart, destroy them and let someone else take up the space they had been in before.

“I was… angry.”

He killed them because they tried to kill Fatal.

-

Man Cheon drives him crazy.

He hates this so much, he hates how easily he gives up on this, how just because his friend told him the victim was dangerous that surely this meant what he did wasn't as heinous, even when there was no proof, no information besides everything the Hunter was telling him. And for all he knows he could be lying to him, again.

"Why. Why didn't you start with that so we could have avoided all this-"

Gesturing listlessly at the alleyway around them Atlas mumbles half heartedly.

"... this."

This time he leans back against a wall and allows himself to slowly sink down onto the floor, pinching the front of his cranium again.

"Do you regret it?"

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Cheonhyeol instinctively takes a step back, which puts him right against the wall, trapped in place by Atlas. The hairs on the back of his head by the neck stand as it catches static. His body wants to respond with a raised blade, a likely less threatening display of Void, a cold look that promises no hesitation if the Titan makes a move.

He doesn’t.

“I don’t know. I didn’t know them all that well. I don’t think anyone did, really.”

He could ruminate on that for hours. Deciding to dip his toes into philosophy was a horrible idea for his own mental health, as it turned out. He couldn’t stop thinking about things that should no longer matter.

“But the one person who came the closest to understanding them… hasn’t killed me yet.

Mabii definitely hated him. He was certain the only reason she hadn’t murdered him on the spot that day was because she was simply tired of losing people. She likely regretted ever meeting him, and would never treat him with anything higher than tolerance towards his existence.

-

He didn't. Know.

He didn't even know them that well.

"This has to be a fucking joke."

But he wasn't laughing, Atlas wishes he could laugh, this was so ridiculous it was almost like the story to a movie, but there were no cameras, no do overs, just two idiots in the present in a dark alley with no way out of this.

He should turn him into the Vanguard, he was dangerous, to Shiloh, to everyone around him, and yet he still misses the day where the biggest worry for the three of them was just whether or not they were going to run out of alcohol while playing a drinking game. Deep down he still cared.

Finally backing off of the Hunter Atlas stays motionless for a moment before turning the other way and punching the wall behind him, arc crackling furiously before dissipating with a heavy sigh that shows up as condensation in the cool night air.

It doesn't help the situation much but the stinging in his knuckles does make him feel a lot better, helps him focus his frustration on something else. Bringing his fist back he massages it, vision casted onto the floor between them.

"Then why did you do it."

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

Tianlong. The Warlock who made a horrible decision and had to live through the aftermath. Who faked their death, not once, but twice. Who tried to kill Fatal. Who has potentially killed others before.

The Exo who spent so much time working on a way to eradicate the influence of the Darkness. Who claimed to have never faked affection towards those who called them a friend or sibling. Who put up a fight, but ultimately let Cheonhyeol kill them.

Did they deserve it?

“I’m not sure.”

They had friends, if few in numbers. They had people who protected them, who worked with them, who cried for them. But did they *know* them?

“I’m not sure…”

No one really seemed to have. Not even those who thought they did. Not even himself, who spent months digging into their past - or her, who knew them since they were Xiezhi.

“…Does it matter?”

Was their death justified by Cheonhyeol saying that it was? By Atlas believing that it was? The fact that he had erased them would be not changed by the answer. Could it somehow be considered better, less reprehensible, because someone decided that by their own metric, Tianlong had deserved it?

-

“Does it matter? Does it matter? If my friend killed someone who was genuinely a threat to everyone else-”

Stepping towards the Hunter, without eyes to convey his emotions he chooses to let his arc crackle softly beneath his plates as he “stares” into his eyes. Neither Guardian towered over each other but there was no arguing the fact that Atlas was easily much larger than the lanky human, and he uses that to his advantage as he backs the Hunter against the wall. 

“-Or if he just decided to torture someone who was just like everyone else.”

He’s not sure what the Hunter’s trying to get at, he’s been infuriatingly vague about the whole reset thing, the only thing he’s been clear about was that he didn’t hurt Mori. If he had he would have actually broken more than just a glass in the restaurant.

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

His eyes flicker back up to Atlas.

“I wouldn’t hurt you.”

Unless he had to.

“I’m still the same person I was 10 minutes ago, 10 months ago. I’m still Cheonhyeol.”

Was he?

He still had the same name since he was risen. He still preferred the same weapon loadout. He still enjoyed data collection missions and movie nights and teasing Shiloh about Atlas.

But something definitely changed the day he made the decision to reset Tianlong and bring Hatch to the Tower. He’s existed for a year and a half, and he has been a murderer for at least one third of his life.

-

If he was still the same Cheonhyeol from last year, was he supposed to settle with the fact that he had been friends with a lying murderer?

To his credit the Hunter seems genuine about not planning to hurt him and it almost makes him feel sorry for him. Almost.

"...Did they truly deserve it?"

A beat.

"Deserve having their memories and life ripped away from them? Did they have people who would miss them?"

[fireteam-fireteam]

@fireteam-kaminari

The message that pops up in Atlas' inbox at the crack of dawn is short and to the point. A time and location - early evening, and a relatively high end restaurant near the center of the City. The sender's username is not one registered in his friends list, but it's not difficult to guess who 'cheonhyeol@citynet' is.

[fireteam-kaminari]

fireteam-fireteam

He stumbles as he is pushed, but quickly finds his balance to face Atlas. His eyes can not bear to look to long at him, so he lowers his gaze to a spot on the ground where he can see a small crack in the concrete.

“Would you have preferred I never tell you?”

It’s a genuine question. He thinks Atlas would have been fine not knowing. The confession was not for the Titan, but for his own selfish need to be honest. He has taken a brick off of his chest, only to use it to bludgeon his friend insetad.

Were they even still friends?

Cheonhyeol imagines himself confessing the same thing, not now, but months, maybe years later. Or the truth coming out involuntarily, due to him growing too comfortable. He imagines Atlas realizing that he had been spending time with a murderer for so long, oblivious of his crimes the entire time.

This was preferable for him.

-

He barks out a dry bitter laugh that even has his own Ghost flinching, throwing his head back to the darkened skies.

“Gee I don’t fucking know, would I?”

He feels.. furious, betrayed, and he doesn’t quite know why. Was it the knowledge that someone he trusted turns out to have pretty much killed an exo behind their backs? Was it the cold realization that he knew absolutely nothing about someone who was supposed to be his friend?

“I thought I knew you Cheonhyeol... if that even is your name.”

Can he even trust him anymore to leave Shiloh with him, if he would go so far as to reset someone what’s to say he wouldn’t do it to them if they became a danger to him.

“So should I be watching my back now? Is this a warning?”