fir’s journal

23, she/her | star wars enthusiast | requests welcome!!!

[firsjournal]

Updated Masterlist

hello and welcome to my masterlist!

last updated: 4th April, 2026

*****

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader

A Way to Ease the Pain

Love Lies in a Lightsaber - (Part 1), (Part 2).

Trials and Tribulations

Time for Tea

Monthly Comfort

AUs

Christmas Blooms

The Bad Batch x Reader

Tech x Reader

Misunderstanding

I Missed You

[firsjournal]

Hey there, I saw that requests are open, so I figured I'd drop a line! I would like to request a Tech x Fem!Reader fic; established relationship, lots of fluff and comfort. Basically, Tech has been gone on a mission for a bit, and reader has felt really invisible with him gone. It's been taking a toll on her, and when he finally gets back, Tech can tell. Reader is just trying to make him feel at home now that he has a chance to relax, but Tech is more concerned about her and insists on providing the comfort she needs. No rush at all if you decide to do this, thank you so much!

A/N: thank you so much for your request! i tried to follow your request as much as possible, so i hope you enjoy! i had so much fun writing it <3

I Missed You (Tech x Fem!Reader)

(word count: 3k)

You hated these days. The days that Cid’s strong voice rang clear on their comlinks, urging them on to a new mission, one which you were never completely sure that they’d all return from. It didn’t matter if it was as simple as delivering a message or as difficult as rescuing a Separatist senator, you always worried.

It was inevitable that the Batch would attract trouble. Trouble was almost part of their DNA, to the point where you always had a medpac handy in anticipation of their return after one-too-many post-mission injuries. 

You were especially worried for your boyfriend, Tech. You’d been together a while now, a friendship born from the necessity of someone more qualified in medicine than he thought he was. The relationship came soon after, with you not being able to hide your emotions towards the man: happiness when his feet were safely on the dirty ground of Ord Mantell, and sadness when it was his injuries you’d been patching up after a particularly harsh mission. You’d scolded him when he returned from Serenno with a broken leg, but ultimately the large tears that dripped down your face onto his leg whilst you stabilised the bone led to a long conversation about your feelings for each other, ending with him lifting your hands away from the cast and pressing delicate kisses to your knuckles. 

There were no secrets between you two. He told you everything, regardless of mission severity or money issues. You’d been the same, promising to tell all members of the Batch about how bad certain injuries were, even if you’d wanted to protect Omega’s innocent ears from learning about what a compound fracture was. However, he’d always been hesitant to tell you of Plan 99, knowing that if he even thought about initiating it, you’d fly to their location and stop him yourself. 

But you knew Tech. And you knew the Batch. They never followed orders, and never would. 

Which is why you stood at the bottom of the Marauder's gangplank, trying not to show Tech the beginnings of fat tears in your eyes, reminiscent of the day you’d both confessed your love.

You’d both agreed that your relationship would never get in the way of their missions or Omega’s safety, reluctantly putting your relationship on the backburner. 

You waved all the other members off, excluding Omega, who Hunter had been adamant about staying with you and Cid due to the supposed dangerous nature of this mission. 

Tech placed his helmet down on the third step of the gangplank. Although he’d never said it, you knew he didn’t want to leave you behind. You could see it in the slight shaking of his hand as he took yours into his own, the almost unnoticeable tremble of his lip, and the excessive blinking, like he was trying to stop his own tears from falling. 

You made him feel strong. Every time he left for a mission, it was like that part of him was stripped away.

He looked into your eyes, clammy hands not loosening their grip on yours. 

“We won’t be gone long, cyar’ika. I’ll be back before you notice I’m gone. I promise.”

Feeling his hand squeeze your own, you sighed.

“...I know, Tech. I know. But I have a bad feeling about—”

He cut you off. “Darling, you always have a bad feeling. Perhaps we ought to test your midichlorians when I get back, hmm?” he joked. Well, the closest thing to a joke that you could handle right now. 

Your voice went small. “I just want you to be safe.”

“I’m always safe, my love. You simply do not need to worry about me,” he spoke as a fond expression filled his face. He stepped impossibly closer to you, like he was trying to merge your bodies together, and placed his left hand on your cheek, and his right on the nape of your neck. 

Tech leaned closer towards you, until his lips were merely inches from yours. He started with the corner of your mouth, then moved to your nose, forehead, and finally your lips, peppering kisses around your face. Tech was familiar with your body, he knew where you liked to be held and kissed, and so before every mission he paid special attention to your face, hoping the affection would keep you going throughout his absence. 

“I’ll come back to you, darling. I always will.” 

With that, he placed one last lingering kiss on your lips, turned around to pick up his helmet from the steps, and made his way into the ship. However, before he could fully disappear into the cockpit as he usually did, you called his name. 

“Yes, darling?” he replied.

You wiped away a tear that had fallen down your cheek. “I love you.”

He smiled softly at you, one that was reserved for moments like these. 

“I love you too.”

And with that, he was gone. 

*****

The first rotation wasn’t hard. You took Omega to explore some of the less seedy parts of Ord Mantell, telling her about your own home planet and how it compared to the one you were currently residing on. 

You’d gone back to Cid’s Parlor and asked Omega to assist you in restocking your medpac, trying to keep the young clone out of trouble. She, like her brothers, was prone to causing mischief, regardless of whether you were keeping an eye on her or not. But you didn’t want to risk the wrath of Hunter upon their return, so you tried to keep her occupied.

As she fiddled with a bacta patch, you caught her eye. 

“Something wrong, Omega?” you questioned. 

“Um…Well…No. Yes. How do you deal with Tech leaving you to go on missions? Do you feel sad because you have to stay here sometimes?”

Sighing, you knew she missed her brothers. Like you, she was made to stay behind on missions deemed particularly dangerous, with Hunter claiming that the risk of being caught with known fugitives was too high.

“Well,” you started. “I do miss him. But I know that he only wants me to stay here because he loves me. And I love him, so I trust him.”

Your hand moved to play with the necklace Tech had gifted you on your anniversary. He’d apologised because it wasn’t fancy or expensive, but you didn’t care. It came from love, and that’s what mattered. 

“Do you ever wish we could just live a normal life?” she pondered.

“All the time. And we will, I promise you. We just need some money to… hide under the radar and get the Empire off our backs. But it won’t be long before we can leave. I can feel it.”

Omega paused, like something else was on her mind. 

“Everything alright?”

“Do you…” she started. “Do you think if we find a home that you and Tech will get married?”

The thought took you by surprise. 

Marriage.

You’d thought about it, yes. It was impossible not to think about when you had Tech by your side. But it was even harder to think about when you were missing him as much as you were. 

God, what you’d do to have Tech as your husband. But now wasn’t the right time. For now, you’d be a place for the man to come home and melt in your arms. A place where he didn’t have to face any insulting jabs from his brothers. A place where he could just relax, and not have his mind running at a million miles a minute. 

Just home. Just him. 

“I don’t know, ‘mega. Maybe in the future. But right now, we're happy just as we are, and I don’t want to change that.”

“Hmm, okay!”

She didn’t see the deepened line between your eyes, the sadness that was resting on your soul, the feeling of your heart being torn apart. 

You missed him already.

*****

By the seventh rotation, all you could think about was how much you missed Tech.

What if something bad had happened? What if they were stranded? What if—?

No.

You couldn’t think this way. 

They’d be fine. Tech promised. He promised he’d come back to you. You just needed to be patient. 

Omega had sensed your turmoil and had been trying to do things to improve your mood. She’d forced you to play Dejarik with her a million times, but you could never focus. She’d asked you to show her holo-photos of your youth, but you were never interested when you did. She’d even temporarily given you Lula to hold at night, but all the stuffed Tooka could do was absorb your tears, not wipe them away.

Not like Tech could. 

Even Cid had offered you a drink, a way to blur the misery that you were feeling. But you refused. 

You just wanted your boyfriend to shower you in affection like he did on a daily basis, and you wanted to do the same to him. 

Deciding to go for a walk to clear your mind, you kept your eyes to the ground, not wanting to unwillingly observe some of the happy couples of Ord Mantell walking around the city. 

Everything reminded you of Tech, and seeing other people indulge in the happiness which you deserved right now was devastating. It wasn’t fair. 

You wondered what the man was doing right now, if not being here with you. How was the mission going? You’d taken to trying to think more positively, the negative thoughts from several days ago weighing heavily on your soul. Of course they’d be successful, you thought. Clone Force 99 was elite, specialist, professional, and the rise of the Empire wouldn’t change that. 

You also questioned if Tech was feeling the same as you were right now. He was known for hiding his emotions, less so from you, but you wondered if he divulged how much he missed you to his brothers. Somehow, knowing this would have made you feel better. But alas, radio silence was insisted upon to protect Omega’s safety. 

*****

It has been ten rotations.

Ten rotations since you’d waved goodbye to the Batch.

Ten rotations since you’d waved goodbye to your boyfriend. 

You missed him. So much. 

You felt sorry for Omega, who had taken to entertaining herself with Dejarik and trying to remember every single starship used by the Republic, as per Tech’s request that she learn them (she had to learn the difference between the Republic ships and the Empire’s ships, of course). You’d tried to help her, you really had. But it seemed like in the past few days, she’d spent more hours checking on you than you on her. 

You’d tried to be strong. You’d tried to stop the negative thoughts. But only one question filled your mind. 

What if he was dead?

It was only when you heard the familiar rumbling of the Marauder’s engines that your eyes flickered open, and Omega bounded into the bedroom you were currently holed up in.

“They’re back! They’re back!”

Part of you didn’t believe her. You stood up from the bed and ran as fast as your legs would take you to the hangar, Omega tailing behind you. You accidentally shoved Cid to the side, the Trandoshan exclaiming a loud and angry ‘Hey!” as she went flying. However, it wouldn’t take her long to forgive you, she always said that you and Tech were attached at the hip, and who was she to come between the two of you. 

It didn’t take you long to reach the hangar, and you stood expectantly near the bottom of the ship, antsy for the gangplank to open. 

When it did, you were greeted by Hunter, Wrecker, and Echo making their way down the steps, each greeting you with a smile, pat on the shoulder, or in Wrecker’s case, a big bear hug. 

For a moment, your heart sank. Where was he? 

Your eyes flickered to the ground until you heard a soft voice speaking your name.

Your head lifted to see the man above you, ever so slightly limping down the stairs.

“Oh Tech,” you spoke quietly. 

As he reached the bottom of the stairs, you gazed into his eyes, lip trembling.

“Darling I—”

You wrapped your arms around him, trying not to knock him off balance.

Your voice was no louder than a whisper when you spoke. “I missed you. So much.”

He ran his hand up and down your back, the other tangling in your hair.

“I missed you too. I apologise with my entire soul. Our hyperdrive was stolen whilst the Marauder was docked and it was a momentous effort to retrieve a new one, we tried to get back to you and Omega as soon as we could.”

You didn’t reply, only hugged him tighter, inhaling his scent. He smelt of fuel and pine, a clear indication of what had taken place on the planet they’d been on. 

“Oh sweet girl, I’m sorry, I am so sorry.”

He pressed a long kiss to your temple, grateful to have you in his arms once again.

You never wanted to let him leave.

Sniffling, you pulled back slightly. “What did you do to your leg?”

You felt him freeze in your arms. “Ah. That. Well, it seems I fell whilst we tried to escape some of the more vicious of the local wildlife.”

“Well…well…I need to look, you must be starving too, and I said I’d run you a bath. What about your brothers too? I need to make sure they’re okay too—”

“Darling, darling, slow down. There will be plenty of time for that in a few hours. For now, let me enjoy being back with my girlfriend. I am sure Omega will keep my brothers entertained for a while.”

“I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

A serious expression replaced his previously content one. His hand tightened in your hair, the other rubbing up and down your back to soothe your despair. 

“Of course I am alright. I am back with you.”

So overwhelmed with having him back, you didn’t reply. You couldn’t. You just jumped back into his arms, knowing that with him home, everything would be alright. 

*****

Later on, you decided it was only right that after a long and difficult mission, you’d try your best to get him to relax. Unfortunately, the word ‘relaxation’ didn’t exist in Tech’s vocabulary, but you were hoping he was tired enough to let you coddle him. Starting with his leg. 

“Love, please, please, let me take a look. Isn’t it my job to look after you all?” you pleaded. 

Tech, previously fiddling with his data pad, put the device down and intertwined his hand with yours. 

“I told you, darling, that you do not need to do that. I am perfectly fine, and estimated that I will make a full recovery in approximately two days. It is not even a sprain,” he declared.

You huffed, turning away from the man to retrieve your nearby medpac. 

“I don’t care, Tech. I want to have a look at it,” you argued back, rubbing your hands over your face.

“You know,” he started. “You spend so much time looking after everyone else and you never let anyone else look after you. Perhaps you should let me take care of you tonight. We are partners, are we not? And it seems you might have had a difficult time in my absence, so please—” he paused as he pulled your hands away from your face, kissing your palms. “Please let me take care of my darling girl.”

You opened your mouth to challenge him, but he promptly stopped you.

“Cyare, just for tonight. Just us. Just me making my extended absence up to you, like you deserve.”

To the average person, it may have looked like Tech was too involved in his own brilliance to care deeply for another person. Out of all his brothers, he and Crosshair were the most dismissive of civilians in the war, opting to stay within their own limits, focusing on their strengths and not playing into weaknesses. After meeting you, however, his perspective on the galaxy changed. Suddenly there was a reason to want to have a permanent home. There was a reason to open up to his brothers about his emotions, ones he’d never experienced before meeting you.

There was a reason to care.

You weren’t simply a mission to complete. He soon learned this. But you were a person. With thoughts, feelings, wants, and wishes. You missed him because you enjoyed his presence. You laughed with him because you wanted to see him happy. Once he learned this, it didn’t take much more time for him to fall in love with you. 

Which is exactly why he was being so insistent on caring for you, even though you felt like it should be the opposite.

“Fine,” you reluctantly agreed, a small smile on your face at seeing how determined Tech was to worship you. “Just for tonight.”

It was evident that Tech was satisfied with this answer, as you saw the slight relaxation of his shoulders; he knew he’d won this one. He stood up slowly, not letting go of your hands, and then leaned down to press a tender kiss to your lips. You felt him slightly tug your hands, urging you to stand up.

“Come, mesh’la,” he spoke in a hushed tone, leading you in the direction of your small but private bedroom. “Let me show you just how much I have missed you.”

Tech caught the warm smile on your face after hearing him and leaned down once again, this time to kiss your cheek. Wrecker often teased the man for outwardly appearing to not provide you with much affection, but in private, he simply couldn’t get enough of you. He never would.

Pulling back ever so slightly, he nuzzled his nose into yours and hummed contently, like the only thing that mattered in the world was you.

“I love you, darling. So much.”

He was back in your arms, and you back in his. The pair of you didn’t know how long this reunion would last, the possibility of another mission the next day being high, but tonight you belonged to each other once again.

[firsjournal]

Hii, could i request something about tech please? I'm a sucker for drama maybe about phee and the reader fighting (not physically) to win his attention 😊

A/N: thank you so much for your request! i am so so sorry for how long it took for me to write it, but i hope you enjoy reading nonetheless!! <3 (not proofread so i apologise for any mistakes!)

Misunderstanding (Tech x Jedi!Reader)

(word count: 2.6k)

“Hey, Brown Eyes. Fancy a walk on the beach?”

You and Tech both lifted your heads at the same time as the voice of Phee Genoa permeated the long-standing silence of the living room of the Bad Batch’s comfortable home on Pabu. 

Tech, who was previously absorbed in tinkering with your blaster, had left it forgotten on the coffee table, turning his attention to Phee.

“I do not see why not. Please allow me a moment to gather my belongings,” he replied.

Whilst Tech’s attention was focused elsewhere, you glanced at Phee who shot you a small smirk, knowing she’d successfully gotten under your skin. 

As Jedi General of the Bad Batch during the Clone War, you’d become close with all members of Clone Force 99. You liked Hunter’s strong ability to be Sergeant of his squad. You appreciated the way Echo welcomed you to the group, with him presenting you so much warmth and kindness. You admired Crosshair’s mastery in the art of staying calm and focusing on whatever was in his scope. And you adored how Wrecker could make everyone laugh, even after the most grueling mission.

But it was Tech who you’d grown particularly close with. You could spend hours listening to him chatting about adjustments he was making to the Marauder, or how he would come to you with ideas to make your lightsaber ignite faster.

After Order 66, your life had been torn apart. You’d reconnected with the Batch not long after Crosshair had left them to join up with the Empire. After several months of running with them, this time as their friend and not as their general officer, you’d soon come to realise that when the Council had held you back from love, they’d also held you back from happiness. 

Being around Tech made you happy. 

You liked the way your heart raced whenever he spoke your name. You liked how the sound of his voice made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. You liked the feeling of his hand on your shoulder when you were having a particularly difficult day, and the way he’d comfort you with minimal words, allowing you to swim in the warmth of his presence alone. Plus, Phee wasn’t wrong; he really did have the most beautiful brown eyes. 

It didn’t take you long to realise that you liked him. But of course, once a Jedi, always a Jedi. 

You struggled to process these new emotions, guilt erupting in your mind. You were happy, yes. However, what would your Master have said? What would the Council say? 

There is no emotion, there is peace. 

Had the Order still existed, you’d have been expelled. You could already hear Yoda’s voice criticising you, telling you that you were no longer welcome within the Jedi Order.

Still, you were happy. There was no denying it.

Until Phee Genoa appeared in Cid’s cantina and laid her eyes upon the man who you’d been harbouring a rather large amount of affection for. 

Over the months, she’d spent a significant amount of time with the Batch. They liked her. Omega liked her. You pretended to like her. 

But you saw the way she looked at him. Like he was another of her ancient wonders waiting to be liberated. Like he was ready to be placed in the Archium on Pabu, ready to be shown off to everyone, making it known that he belonged to her. 

You were jealous. You tried not to be, especially because of the condemnation of the emotion during your time with the Jedi. 

It was hard, and you couldn’t help but think back to the times where your jealousy had almost gotten the better of you.

Shaking your head, your thoughts returned to the present. You looked around the room and realised that they’d already left for the beach. You really didn’t want to pour salt in the wound, but you wanted closure. After all, all it would take would be you observing them from your balcony and seeing them together. Then you’d move on. 

Taking a deep breath and rising to your feet, you tentatively headed towards your balcony near the Pabu coastline. It’s what you once loved about your home, its proximity to the beach. Although now you were beginning to regret that sentiment.

Opening the door, you headed outside, the warm Pabu air hitting your face. You moved towards the stone railing, looking out towards the beach. It took a second for you to find the pair, but once you did, you realised that the closure you so desperately wanted may not come so soon.

Tech’s arms were crossed as he walked, brown eyes focused on the yellowing sunset. You knew him well enough to know that there was always something on his mind, but this looked different. He looked tense, like his thoughts were trained on something else. Something other than what, or who he should be thinking about: Phee.

Phee, on the other hand, looked carefree, smiling, laughing, making jokes. Her hand was swinging next to her, twitching every so often like the thought of taking Tech’s hand into hers was getting the better of her. 

Of course, your Jedi upbringing allowed for you to be perceptive of others emotions. Phee’s confidence seemed to be completely opposed by Tech’s…distress?

No, not distress. Anxiety perhaps? You questioned what he could possibly be anxious about. He was settled on a beautiful island with a gorgeous woman at his side, what more could he want?

You frowned, the thought of Tech’s worry overwhelming you. 

You were destroying yourself, you thought. Hidden emotions becoming visible over a man who would never love you back.

You sauntered back into the house, slouched shoulders and blurry eyes making an appearance. 

So this is what heartbreak felt like. 

*****

“I saw ya, y’know.”

You turned your head towards Phee, where she was standing next to you on the balcony, the same one you’d watched the pair just days ago. 

“The other day. You were on the balcony whilst Tech and I were enjoying our walk. For an ex-Jedi, you ain’t exactly good at hiding your presence, which is why I should tell you that I’m going to be pursuing him. Hope ya don’t mind.”

Attempting to conceal your emotions, you replied as casually as possible. “Why would I mind, Phee?”

“You’re not sneaky, I see how you look at him. The first time I met y’all I saw how you looked at him. 

Inhaling quietly, you looked away from her, before speaking in a voice coated in a false confidence. 

“He’s my friend. He worked together and now we don’t, but I appreciate his company nonetheless. We’re friends, that’s all.”

She huffed out a laugh. “If y’all are friends, how come you don’t look at Hunter or Wrecker like that? You ain’t slick, Jedi.”

“Phee, it’s not a problem if you want to court him. I have no objections, in fact I say go for it. Tech deserves some happiness after everything.”

You thought your tongue would bleed with how hard you were biting it.

Tears were threatening to fall, and you knew if she continued to talk your true feelings would soon be revealed.

A pause, then: “Sounds good. I’ll go ask him now. See ya, Jedi.”

Nonchalantly, you nodded your head. “Good luck.”

As soon as you heard the door close, the emotions which you’d tried so hard to conceal announced themselves abruptly.

He was gone, and he’d never be yours. This perfect, perfect man of which you’d been hiding your feelings for would never be yours, because you were too much of a coward to tell him how you felt. 

Staring out into the sunset, you tasted saltiness on your lips. You presumed it to be the sea air announcing itself through the warm wind, but when you saw that the sunset you loved oh so much had blurred into what looked like one of Omega’s paintings, you realised there were tears falling down your face.

Suddenly, you were sobbing. Silent tears fell like waterfalls down your cheeks, creating an ocean of despair at your feet. It felt like you’d taken a lightsaber to the heart.

Your weeping hid the sound of the door opening. 

Your sadness masked the feeling of a tender hand on your shoulder. 

It was only when you heard your name spoken that you turned your attention to the person next to you.

Hunter.

Wiping your eyes on the sleeve of your robe, you greeted the man.

“H-Hunter, hello.”

He didn’t speak. He didn’t need to. His enhanced senses forced your conversation with Phee into earshot whilst he sat just through the wall. He’d known for a long time how you felt towards Tech. Ever since they were assigned to you in the war, he’d known. Small glances towards the man, kind gestures which had been an attempt at telling Tech how you felt.

But right now, what you needed was silent comfort, not someone to tell you everything would be fine. So as he rubbed your back, quietly whispering “Shh, you’re okay. I’ve got you,” you wanted to believe him.

You couldn’t.

*****

Four days had passed and you’d made an active effort to avoid both Tech and Phee. In fact, in four days you’d had time to decide that you’d overstayed your welcome on Pabu. You’d caught wind of a network known as the Hidden Path and decided that your help would be needed there.

It would be hard to leave your squad. To leave Omega. To leave Tech.

But it would have been impossible to stay, watching the new couple be happy together.

You quietly packed your bags and headed down to the ship you’d secretly stashed away in the cave near the beach.

You didn’t leave a note.

You didn’t need to.

Stepping foot on the gangplank, you looked into the ship, and then back out at the cave and the dark sky beyond. 

This was it.

Until you heard a familiar soft voice calling your name.

Looking back out to the cave, you spotted the one person you didn’t want to see. He couldn’t possibly understand your feelings, why would he?

“Tech. Please just…go.”

He shook his head and took a few tentative steps forward. 

“No. I am not leaving. Not until you tell me your reason for removing your belongings from our home and departing unannounced.”

You sighed, dropping the last of your boxes on the ship. How could one man be so incredibly clever yet so dense at the same time? You turned your gaze away from him. Just looking at him made your eyes fill with tears. 

“Please I…Just…Just let me go. I’m sure Phee is missing you. She won’t be happy if she sees you with me.”

He blinked at you, and his mouth opened and closed like he couldn’t process what you’d just said. 

“Perhaps you could elaborate? Why would Phee be unhappy if we are seen together?” he spoke, almost how one would speak to a scared Tooka. 

You shrugged, a frown appearing on your face. 

“You know why, Tech. There’s no point hiding it now. Make her happy, like she deserves, please,” you pleaded. All you wanted was for him to leave, to let you get on your ship and never come back, spending every day for the rest of your life trying to forget the memories you’d made as friends. 

“I do not understand the point you are trying to make–”

You cut him off before he could rub anymore salt in the wound.

‘Phee is your girlfriend! She asked me if I would be upset if she asked you out and I said no but the truth is I am upset because I’ve been in love with you since the War, but my emotions have been so conflicted and I could never tell you because it’s against the Code and…and now I’ve lost my chance and you’re with her and she finds so much happiness in watching me suffer but…but I love you, Tech. I love you, and I just want you to know that before I leave,” you rambled, the words spilling out of your mouth.

You couldn’t meet his eyes, the tears falling down your face filling you with embarrassment. 

He paused for a moment, a shocked expression momentarily on his face. You could feel the emotions running through his mind; sadness in particular making itself known to you. It felt like your Force sensitivity was mocking you, allowing you to know what Tech was feeling but not being able to act on it. You were frozen to the spot. 

The sound of Tech clearing his throat was a welcome one after your outburst, breaking the silence, but you still feared his response. You knew he wouldn’t laugh at you, but hearing his rejection rather than simply just presuming it was bound to be nothing less than devastating. 

“Darling…” 

Your head shot up, eyes focusing on where Tech stood. 

He spoke again, quietly, filled with as much affection as his brain would let him.

“Darling, to put it simply, you have misunderstood.”

You watched him push his goggles up his face, a nervous tick that you’d picked up on since the day you'd met the Batch. 

The roles you’d assumed had been reversed. Where before, Tech was the one confused by your sorrow, it was now you confused by his ambiguous choice of words. What did he mean by calling you darling?

“Misunderstood?” you scoffed, dismissing any form of affection that he was trying to push towards you. “What is there to misunderstand, Tech?”

You heard him take a deep breath. You knew whatever he was about to say was serious. 

Tech was always a confident speaker.

He was nervous.

“It was never Phee. It was you. It always has been, and it always will be.”

Oh.

His face softened, as if he was just as relieved as you to get it off his chest. Without taking another second to wait for your reaction, he continued speaking, adjusting his goggles again.

“Phee approached me several days ago, informing me that she, in her words ‘liked me’ and that it would be favourable if the two of us entered into a relationship.”

“What did you tell her?” you murmured, just loud enough for him to hear over the chirping of nearby moon-yos awakening with the morning sun.

“That the sentiment was appreciated. However, my affection lies with someone else. You.”

You nibbled your bottom lip, testing if somehow this was a dream. You quickly realised it wasn’t.

Tech moved to walk towards where you were standing on the gangplank. You, however, were frozen in place, stunned by his confession. You watched as he gently reached his hand out towards you, unthreatened by your wide eyes and pale expression.

“May I take your hand, cyare?” he asked tenderly.

You found that you could do nothing except nod as he slowly took your hand, acting like in that moment, you were a precious artifact, only to be held by the gentlest, most experienced hands. Tech’s hands. 

He ran his ever so slightly calloused thumb over your knuckles before raising them to his lips.

“I understand this will be difficult for the both of us, given your Jedi background and my distinct focus on furthering my knowledge, but…” he hesitated. “...But if it is something you are willing to try then I would be honoured to call you my partner.”

“Really? That’s something you want, Tech?”

He smiled at you, his pupils dilating.

“There is nothing that would make me happier, darling.”

You jumped forward to wrap your arms around his neck, and although you felt him flinch, clearly not used to such physical affection (other than occasionally from Omega and Wrecker), he soon relaxed into the hug, stroking one hand through your hair and the other resting on your back. 

Maybe staying on Pabu wouldn’t be as bad as you thought.

[firsjournal]

hello! just an announcement to say that i promise i havent abandoned this account and i am currently taking requests for obi-wan AND the bad batch! ive been so obsessed with tbb recently but i've also been struggling with motivation so much so i would love some requests!!!

[firsjournal]

A/N: merry christmas to all those who celebrate! here is the christmas/flower shop au i promised you all, just in time for christmas day <3 i hope you enjoy! (i apologise for any mistakes, i havent had time to fully proofread it yet!)

warnings: alcohol mentions.

Christmas Blooms

(word count: 3.3k)

Ding ding!

Obi-Wan looked up from his work bench, where he had been shaping a particularly large poinsettia ready for Christmas, and moved his gaze to the door. His eyes rested on you, as you pulled your scarf off from where it was tight around your neck, and he beamed at you.

You’d been a regular visitor in his flower shop, Stems of Stewjon, for nearly a year now. Since you’d moved to a new city, you promised yourself you’d buy fresh flowers every week as a way to keep your mood uplifted, and your house smelling floral. It had been several months before you’d come across Obi-Wan’s shop, opting to buy from supermarkets for convenience, before realising that the quality of his flowers and houseplants were infinitely better than those you’d previously been buying. 

You also came to him from presents, a bouquet of lilies when your friend had been sick, a bunch of tulips for your mother’s birthday which he’d given you in one of those flattened flower boxes to send to her, and forget-me-not seeds for your grandmother’s garden when she’d been particularly missing you.

However, Obi-Wan’s favourite thing was when you asked him to surprise you with a bouquet of his choosing, asking him to include his favourite flowers, calling him ‘the expert’. 

Stems of Stewjon was good for other reasons, too. It allowed you speak to new people. When you’d first moved, you didn’t know anyone, but after introducing yourself to Obi-Wan, the two of you had become fast friends. He’d helped you with directions (“I would avoid that route, you’ll pass my biggest competitor and I simply can’t do with losing my most regular customer,” he’d teased) and the two of you even just chatted about life, your job, anything that came to mind. His assistant, Ahsoka, had even befriended you too, and you enjoyed speaking with her about Obi-Wan, learning all his little quirks, like how he made sure to include blue flowers in every bouquet he made for you because it was his favourite colour.

What you didn’t know was that the months of your weekly visits had allowed him to develop certain feelings towards you. You’d shared so much of your life with him, and he had too. He loved your insights into flowers he would sell, the way you’d always come in with a smile on your face and ask him how his day had been going. 

And what he didn’t know is that you felt the exact same. But it was almost as if the two of you had made some sort of agreement that you didn’t know about to never tell one another about your feelings. Obi-Wan often thought of you as a flower of summer, and him of winter: whilst you knew the same Earth and same environment, just like how bulbs lay together in the soil, you would never be able to bloom together, destined to hide away whilst the other flourishes. It was tragic, really. 

Right now, you were looking for something. It was typical of Obi-Wan to jump to conclusions. 

Which is exactly what he was about to do.

As you walked further into the shop, you smiled back at him. “Obi-Wan! How are we today? Is Ahsoka in?”

Turning away from his workbench completely, he pulled off the gloves he used when dealing with the particularly rambunctious poinsettia. “I’m excellent, thank you! How might you be today? And no, I thought I’d give her the day off considering she’s been working so hard in this run up to Christmas.”

“Ah, always the gentleman, aren’t you?”

He was used to you poking fun at him.

A lopsided grin appeared on his face. “I try my best. Anyway, is there anything specific you’re looking for today? How about another bunch of irises, you said you liked them last time? Oh! How about this poinsettia that I'm wrangling at the moment? Very good if you’re in the market for Christmas plants! I even have some Christmas trees if you’re looking for one of those.”

You laughed at his overexuberance. It was one of the things you liked about him, how discussing his shop and merchandise brought out a side of childish whimsy in him that not many others saw. “Actually, no flowers today. I was just wondering if you’d gotten any mistletoe in yet?”

Oh.

His face dropped. 

One, mistletoe was clearly romantic. Maybe you had a partner? He knew he shouldn’t be sad about this when you had your own life and friends, and you were allowed to know people that weren’t him.

Two, you always give a reason for why you’re buying a certain plant. Anxiety settled in his body when he realised you weren’t giving a reason for buying mistletoe. 

Upset couldn’t begin to describe how he was feeling. He knew he should have asked you out earlier. It had only dawned on him now that he’d missed his chance, and he knew he’d regret it for a very, very long time. 

He couldn’t meet your eyes, so his own peered down at the floor whilst he spoke. “Oh. Um…yes. Let me just…I’ll go and get you some. I won’t be a moment.”

You grinned at him, not picking up on the man’s disheartened nature. “Thank you, Obi-Wan. I appreciate it.”

A few moments later, he returned with a rather large basket of mistletoe. It looked heavy, but the florist seemed to be carrying it with no difficulty at all.

As he pushed his hair back from his face, having fallen in front of his eyes when he was collecting the basket, you couldn’t help but admire the veins in his arms. 

“How much do you require?” he asked you, his voice taking on a more serious tone of voice to the usual one you were used to.

“A few bunches should be fine, thank you.”

“Of course,” he replied.

Perhaps you did notice something was wrong. Perhaps you knew he was disappointed by you buying mistletoe. 

Right now, however, you were focused on one thing. Buying the mistletoe and getting it to your friend’s house. It was, of course, the key component in your master plan: getting two of your other friends together. You inadvertently smiled at the thought, excited by the event happening later in the day.

Obi-Wan, seeing your smile and presuming that it was for your supposed significant other, wrung his hands together. A nervous tick he hadn’t done in years. 

He was well and truly devastated.

As you handed him the money, and he handed you the bunches of mistletoe, your fingers brushed and Obi-Wan could have sworn he felt a spark between you.

Wishful thinking, he thought. She’s clearly in a happy, comfortable relationship and I won’t ruin that.

Snapping him out his thoughts, he heard you speak. “Hopefully I’ll see you before Christmas but if not, have a good one!”

A sad smile appeared on his face. “Thank you, and you too.” 

And with that, you were gone.

*****

The next day came. The party had been a success. You’d managed to convince your friends to meet under the mistletoe and allow for them to start a new relationship. You were very happy, but a part of you couldn’t help but feel jealousy towards the two of them. They would have a relationship for Christmas, and you were as single as you’d been last year. And the year before that.

Shaking the thoughts out of your head, you thought it was a good idea to thank the person who helped start the relationship between your friends: Obi-Wan.

You took the time to think, what did you know he liked? And what could you gift him that might show your certain feelings towards him? After some mental deliberation, you concluded that you’d gift him a flat white from your favourite coffee shop, and a beautifully decorated red plant pot that you’d seen in another shop to match his hair and his favourite thing: plants.

After setting out on a mission to acquire the goods, it didn’t take you long to get to Stems of Stewjon.

Ding ding!

Just like the previous day, Obi-Wan lifted his head when he heard the bell on the door ring out. He hadn’t been expecting your arrival, but he thought perhaps he’d manifested it with how much he’d been thinking about you in the past day.

“Y/N? Back so soon?” he spoke as his eyes flickered down to the coffee and gift-wrapped present you were holding in your hands.

You let out a nervous chuckle. “Oh…yes…um…I just got you a little present for getting me the mistletoe yesterday, you made two people very happy.”

The same sadness Obi-Wan had felt after your conversation yesterday returned. His theory was confirmed: you were in a relationship.

Adjusting the neckline of his now rather scratchy and somewhat constricting Christmas jumper, (the man was trying his best to not let the news ruin his celebrations) he tried to calmly articulate his thoughts. “...Well, I’m happy to have helped you and your partner celebrate the holidays…”

Your eyes widened as he spoke.

You blinked at him. What was he talking about?

It took you a moment to speak. “I’m sorry, my partner?”

He nodded. “Yes. Your partner. You bought mistletoe for the two of you. You just said I made two people very happy.”

You placed the coffee and plant pot down on the counter and ran your hand over your face.

“Yeah. You made two people happy. My two friends, the mistletoe was part of my plan to get them together at a party we had last night. I…I don’t have a partner. Did you think I did?”

It was Obi-Wan’s turn to be shocked. 

He didn’t speak right away. He was wrong? But you were so happy yesterday. So excited. Of course the first thing his mind went to was that you must be thrilled to spend Christmas with your significant other. Of course the jealousy had corrupted his mind so much that he’d simply presumed the mistletoe was for a partner.

But then, he had a moment of realisation.

You’re single.

And you brought him gifts. Including his favourite coffee. Simply just to say thanks.

“I…I’m sorry. I just presumed that…” he stuttered. He really didn’t know how to react to this news.

You didn’t really know what to do either. The man standing in front of you was clearly stunned by the revelation, and you didn’t want to immediately reveal your feelings to the florist, even if his jealousy was shining though just moments ago.

“What are you sorry for, Obi-Wan?”

He lifted his head up and met your eyes.

“I thought you had a partner. I let my…jealousy get the better of me even though you’re my customer and it wasn’t my place and—”

He was nervously rambling now, and you needed to cut him off before it went too far.

“Jealousy? What could you possibly be jealous of? You needed to hear the words come from his mouth. You also didn’t want to incorrectly presume and be in the same situation he was in.

He sighed. 

“I was…jealous of the partner I thought you were with. I…really like you, Y/N, and I know I shouldn’t but there is truly nobody as kind or thoughtful as you in this world and I want to get to know you outside of you being a customer of my business. Would that be alright?”

Gently taking his hand over the counter, you smiled at him.

“I would like nothing more, Obi.”

He smiled back at you.

“Have you any plans for Christmas Day? Maybe we could start there…if it isn’t too personal of course. I can cook us a dinner and we can watch a film and—”

“That sounds wonderful, Obi-Wan. I can’t wait.”

“Great…great!” He pulled out a business card from the drawer of his desk and handed it to you. You noticed it said ‘Mr. O.W. Kenobi, Florist’ and you couldn’t help but think how utterly adorable it was. “This card has my phone number and if you text it, I’ll send you my address, okay?”

“Okay,” you grinned. “I suppose I’ll see you on Christmas Day then.”

“That you will, my dear.”

*****

Three Days Later

You awoke at 6:31am on Christmas Day. You’d always had trouble sleeping on Christmas, and that didn’t go away despite you now being an adult. 

You’d spent the last few days collecting some presents for Obi-Wan. You loved gift-giving, and you couldn’t just turn up to his house on Christmas Day empty handed, especially because you thought it could technically be considered your first date. 

So, a few hours later with presents in hand, along with a bottle of wine and a store-bought yule log, you set off towards the address that Obi-Wan had texted you the night of three days ago. 

Stepping out of your home, you saw that small flakes of snow had begun to fall, coating the ground in a thin layer of white. 

You wrapped your scarf tiger around your neck and continued walking the relatively short distance to Obi-Wan’s home. Christmas Day had made the streets deserted, and people were spending time with their loved ones, something you had been solely missing a few days ago, before your plans with Obi-Wan had been made.

Once you arrived, you took a deep breath and knocked on the door, which quickly flew open revealing the rosey-cheeked man.

“Y/N! You’re here! Come in, come in! You must be freezing, I can’t believe it's snowing! Here, let me take those and you can get warm.”

Oh, he was so sweet. 

Obi-Wan’s home was as you’d anticipated. Full of houseplants, with monstera deliciosa being a clear favourite, and vases upon vases of different flowers laid out. Of course, he had a real nordmann fir Christmas tree in the corner of his living room with some neatly wrapped presents laid underneath it. Who they were for, you didn’t know.

As he reentered the living room where you now stood, you turned to him.

“Something smells good,” you commented. 

“Turkey is in the oven, the vegetables are cooking, it won’t be long to wait until we can eat. In the meantime, perhaps we can drink some wine and open some presents? The ones under the tree are for you…” he said bashfully.

“For me? Obi-Wan, you didn’t have to.”

“I did, considering the presents in the bag you just gave me are all for me. What kind of a person would I be if you turned up with all these gifts and I got you nothing? Anyway, let me get you a drink and we can start.”

What you didn’t know about Obi-Wan until today, is that gift giving was definitely his love language. Truthfully, he had gone a little overboard with presents for you, but realistically it was because he loved you and just wanted to see your excited smile. Over the past few months of knowing each other, you’d absentmindedly discussed things that you’d had your eye on, or didn’t want to buy due to expenses. So, this was his time to shine, and he could finally reward you for the excellent company you made whilst buying from Stems of Stewjon.

Returning from the kitchen with two glasses of wine, he handed you one, and grabbed a present from under the tree and handed it to you, smiling.

“Here. The lovely guest should go first.”

And so the present opening commenced.

Before you knew it, several hours had passed. Presents had been opened, dinner had been served (Obi-Wan was definitely being humble when he’d said he was a good cook, he was in fact an excellent cook and you were now taking several plates worth of leftovers with you) and now you didn’t quite know what to do.

“Hmm…” Obi-Wan stroked his beard as he pondered. “Well I have some board games, or we could watch a film.”

“I say a film,” you replied. “I’m not sure I could handle the stress of Monopoly right now.”

He chuckled. “Fair enough. A film it is. Any suggestions?”

You both agreed on a suggestion and sat down to watch the film. You didn’t quite know where to sit, so you both sat on the same sofa, about six inches between the two of you, and he pressed play on the TV. 

As the film went on, your eyelids grew heavier and heavier, and you could feel your body leaning towards the only warm thing in the vicinity: Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan himself was particularly nervous to see you leaning towards him, eyes closing. He knew that this was technically your first date, and he thought it was going well, but he didn’t want to mess this one up. He really enjoyed your company, he thought you were kind and sweet and an utter joy to be around, and he’d hoped that he’d shown his affection for you through his gifts.

You secretly hoped the same in your gifts to him.

So, with as much care as he could muster up, he let you lean into him, guiding your head into the crook of his neck, and wrapping his arm around your shoulders.

Whispering, he kissed your head and spoke. “Merry Christmas, Y/N. I’ve got you.”

When you woke the next morning, you were laid on the same sofa you fell asleep on, wrapped in a blanket with a soft pillow below your head, both of which smelt distinctly of Obi-Wan.

Speaking of, you saw the man sitting on an armchair in the corner of the room, coffee in hand, smiling. 

“Good morning. I hope you were comfortable enough on the sofa.”

“I was, thank you. I…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep here, I must have been tired.”

“It’s no problem, I’m glad you were able to rest. Here, I made you a coffee. Your favourite.”

You smiled in thanks, and took a sip of the coffee he’d handed you.

He took a deep breath, and you noted that he looked slightly nervous. “I hope you don’t mind, but I actually have one more present for you.”

You looked at him, a puzzled expression on your face.

“I was meant to give it to you yesterday when you were leaving, but…well…you stayed,” he spoke, laughing.

“Sure, what is it?”

He held his hand out for you, and you took it. This man, your dear friend, florist, and romantic interest was offering you yet another gift, despite spoiling you yesterday. You truly didn’t know what to expect. The man was an enigma, and you were delightfully interested in him. 

Leading you out into the hallway, he suddenly stopped and looked at you, a small smirk on his face.

Clearly you weren’t in on the joke.

“What is it?” you asked.

He simply replied: “Look up.”

Mistletoe.

In the doorway.

Placed there by him.

“Can’t break tradition now can we?” he joked.

“I suppose we can’t.”

He leaned forward, and his lips met yours in sweet but slow kiss, one which showed just how deep his yearning for you went. You quickly reciprocated, placing a hand on his shoulder and the other on his back, bringing the two of you closer together.

After a few moments, he broke the kiss, and he sent you a soft smile. 

“I thought perhaps since you helped your friends into a relationship through mistletoe you’d like the favour returned.”

Your heart melted. 

You pulled him into another kiss, this time with more passion, showing him how much you also loved him.

He didn’t pull away.

Later on in the day, when you laid in each other’s arms, you wondered what you did to deserve such a wonderful Christmas.

You thought that maybe you were neither winter or summer flowers, you were the spring ones. Perhaps you were the daffodils that signaled that the darkness of winter was finally over. Obi-Wan thought the two of you were closer to snowdrops, however. The bond between winter and spring, a reminder that although winter is still present, a new hope for spring arises, a reminder that better days are coming.

[firsjournal]

hello!!

just a lil update to say that im currently writing a christmas au oneshot for obi-wan that im v excited about but ive had such a busy few weeks (it’s also my birthday today and my lovely friend did get me some obi-wan themed presents which im obsessed with) and im hoping to get it out either tomorrow or christmas eve!!

i also have the temple guard au in progress so i can’t wait to keep writing that one!

and thank you for reading my stuff!! <3 it makes me very happy to see people enjoying it as much as i enjoyed writing it

[firsjournal]

A/N: hello! here is part 2, it wasn't meant to be as long as it is (i wanted to write a winter forced proximity which then turned into this lol) but im proud of it and i hope you enjoy!!

warnings: mentions of injury, angst.

Love Lies in a Lightsaber (Part 2)

(word count: 5k)

You weren’t sure how long you were out of it for. For all you knew, you were dead. You couldn’t remember what happened on Sovath or why your subconscious was currently floating in a liminal space. Had you ascended? Perhaps become a Force ghost that was waiting to reveal itself to a particular Jedi? You weren’t sure, but all you could see was the darkness of whatever realm you were currently in.

You did try to remember what event caused you to be in this strange place, with the most you could remember being the feeling of warmth and wetness on your face and your skin. You knew it felt familiar. Comforting. Safe, even. But what was it? What, or who could cause it?

So when you were eased out of your deep sleep to one of lingering pain, flashes of lights behind your closed eyelids, and the sounds of beeping, your brain could only focus on one thing.

Obi-Wan. 

Although you couldn’t see him right now, you could certainly feel his presence. He was everywhere, like your head was trying to prepare you for him before you woke up completely. You could smell the scent of clean robes and blaster residue that lingered on his tunic from his endless participation in battles. You could hear the smoothness of his voice, how it always reminded you of the ocean, soft waves rolling through your ears with the ripples becoming forceful when need be. You could taste the saltiness of his tears on your face when he thought you were going to die in his arms. And you could feel his frantic hands grasping at your own robes, their shaking reminding you once again of just how scared he was when he thought Anakin wouldn’t make it to retrieve the both of you from the facility on Sovath. 

But when you finally woke, you didn’t have to just imagine what it was like for him to be by your side. Because you could finally see him. 

Your eyelids fluttered open, and blurriness taking over your vision for a moment whilst you readjusted to being truly awake. 

Looking around the room you were laid in, your eyes scanned the cards and flowers that littered your bedside, the bandages on your body, and golden sun shining in through the window. 

Then your eyes came to rest on the man sitting in the chair next to your bed. He was asleep, his auburn locks having fallen into his eyes as he slouched into the seat. Evidently tired, every so often he would let out soft snores, a declaration of how little sleep he’d got since your injuries. Oh, he looked so tired. The dark circles under his closed eyes told you that also. There was a similar element of innocence, though. One which you hadn’t seen since he was a Padawan. Since before Qui-Gon’s death.

After a moment, he inhaled sharply, and his own eyes flickered open, like he had sensed your return to the world through the Force.

His eyes shimmered with unshed tears, hidden feelings attempting to shine through. 

“Y/N…” he whispered softly. 

You tried to speak his name with the same gentleness he had spoken yours with, but all that came out was an incomprehensible jumble of words.

“You’re okay. You’re alright. Don’t try to move, your body is still healing, okay?”

You moved your head in what looked like a nod, neck still hurting from your weeks of sleep.

He let out the smallest laugh, trying to prevent his tears from falling. “You scared me, Y/N. I thought you’d left me.”

“I…What happened?” you probed, your senses finally coming back to you. 

He sighed and rubbed his forehead, a crease appearing between his eyebrows. “We…we were on a mission…on Sovath, remember? We were doing reconnaissance in that Separatist facility and they were using it for the storage of battle droids. You were detected and injured when the droids found you…and they shot at you. To be quite honest, we barely got out alive…I thought at one point you’d died in my arms.”

Oh. 

It was all coming back to you. 

Closing your eyes, you began to remember what happened.

“How did you get us out?”

“I had to carry you out,” he admitted. “Luckily not all of the droids in storage powered on when they sensed you, so I destroyed a few and ran from the rest. Anakin went back to the ship and he was waiting for us when we escaped the building, but you were unconscious the entire flight home…I was cleaning your wounds and you didn’t even react. We were scared you wouldn’t wake up.”

You closed your eyes. It was all coming back to you now.

The droids, the thermal detonators, your injuries, your—

“Lightsaber. Where is my lightsaber?” 

Obi-Wan froze.

You blinked at him.

“Well…” 

He tentatively reached into a compartment of his utility belt and pulled out a small cloth. He looked at it in his hand for a second before slowly bringing it to you. Taking the cloth, you looked him in the eyes.

“Obi-Wan…what is this?”

“Just…just open it. Please.” You noticed he’d looked away from you, unable to meet your questioning gaze.

Doing as he said, you hesitantly opened the folder piece of cloth, only to reveal what was left of your shattered blue kyber crystal. 

“I’ve meditated with it for weeks since you’ve been asleep. I’ve tried everything to try and fix it but it’s beyond fixing I’m afraid.”

You didn’t reply. You couldn’t. 

You knew you shouldn’t be attached to something as material as a lightsaber, but you were. You’d spent years perfecting it, modifying it, focusing your training on the balance between your style and your saber, treating it as an extension of yourself. You’d even been gifted new parts for it by your Master on your sixteenth birthday. And now it was gone.

Obi-Wan offered some sympathy. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I knew how much it meant to you.” 

“I suppose this means I’ll have to take a trip to Ilum, doesn’t it?” you asked rhetorically. 

“Unfortunately so. I know you don’t enjoy the cold. Perhaps I could come with you? It is partly my fault that your lightsaber was destroyed, so it is the least I can do.”

You didn’t reply. You just laid in your bed, feelings of despair arising.

Despair over your lightsaber, yes. But also despair because of this man who currently sat beside you.

This man who’d carried you out of a facility full of droids. This man who had done anything and everything to make sure you’d survive. This man who’d sat at your bedside for weeks whilst you slept, making sure that when you woke up, you wouldn’t be scared and alone in case your memory eluded you. And this man, who had tried his hardest to fix your kyber crystal, even though he knew it would be an impossible job. 

You were completely and utterly in love with Obi-Wan Kenobi.

And even though these emotions were running high between yourself and Obi-Wan, neither of you could reveal your true feelings. 

Not right now, anyway. 

*****

A week after you’d been dismissed from the Halls of Healing, you found yourself sitting under a large tree in the Temple gardens. You watched the orange sunset as you’d done for the past several days, opting for peace and quiet over the intensity of the Temple refectory. It was funny, you thought, how even though you’d taken to trying to avoid Obi-Wan for fears of your feelings towards him consuming you, the world was constantly trying to remind him of you. The colours of the bright sunset were akin to the colour of his hair, and the bright blue sky that shone through even the most ominous clouds was comparable to his eyes and his personality. 

You would never really be able to escape him, even if you tried your very hardest.

Shaking your head, you returned your thoughts to your daily reflection of the other events of the past few weeks.

Your lightsaber was destroyed. Gone. You’d been temporarily housing a spare lightsaber on your utility belt whilst recovering from your blaster wounds, but you really did need a new one. 

Hence, you would have to make the trip to Ilum.

As much as you tried to deny it, you did want Obi-Wan there. You wanted his comfort. You wanted his company. And if he was offering it to you on his own accord then stars, of course you would accept. Even if you were trying to avoid him at the moment. 

You were suddenly snapped out of your thoughts by a soft voice behind you. “May I join you?” Obi-Wan spoke. 

“Of course,” you replied.

He moved to sit next to your left, keeping his gaze towards the sunset, just like yours. He sat, cross-legged, hands resting on his knees like he was about to start meditating. You peeked at him from the corner of your eye, and noticed the somewhat distressed look on his face, the crease between his brows making another appearance. 

“I understand you’ve been thinking about making the trip to Ilum.”

You exhaled, looking down at your hands which currently rested in your lap.

“...I have.”

“I wondered if you’d thought anymore about my offer. Considering recently it feels like you’ve been trying to avoid me.”

“Obi-Wan—”

He held a hand out to pause your retort. “Y/N. It’s alright. I know the past few weeks haven’t exactly been the easiest for you. Which is why I understand that you may have required some extra space. But, it is also why I wish to accompany you to Ilum. You don’t have to say yes, but my offer stands.”

Force, he was persistent. But you loved him for it. Which is why you couldn’t say no when you found yourself drowning in his eyes. 

“You can come. I suppose the company will be nice on a desolate planet like Ilum.”

He gave you a small, excited smile, like a youngling who’d just held a lightsaber for the first time.

“Excellent,” he beamed. “When were you anticipating leaving?”

“I was thinking about tomorrow. I’m not sure I like the feeling of a saber that isn’t my own at my side.”

This made him chuckle. “Then tomorrow it is.”

Tomorrow, you would go with Obi-Wan to Ilum, simply replace your lightsaber, and go on with your life as you did before the mission on Sovath. 

Nothing more, nothing less.

*****

At exactly 0500 hours, you met Obi-Wan in the Temple hangar, ready to embark on the journey. You noticed he was carrying a thick insulated robe, ready to brave the harsh weather of Ilum.

When he noticed you, he waved at you. “Ah, you’re already here! Are you ready to go?” 

You nodded back, tightening your grip on your own thermal robe.

“Good. Then let’s go and get you a new kyber crystal.”

You both boarded the ship, with him taking the pilot’s seat and you quietly sitting next to him. You still felt slightly awkward about his confrontation yesterday, so sitting in silence for some of the long journey seemed like your only option.

You looked over at Obi-Wan, who was focused on flying the ship out of Coruscant’s atmosphere. Whilst his face looked relaxed, you could see the way he gripped the controls too hard, and how he was holding tension in his shoulders. 

Evidently he was hiding something. 

You just didn’t know what.

*****

Many hours later, your ship touched down on Ilum. You hadn’t been to the planet since you were eight, when you’d come with the other younglings to find your crystal and eventually build your saber. As you stepped off the ship, you were greeted with the white plains of ice on the surface of the planet, and after wrapping the thermal robe around yourself, you turned around to try and see the Jedi Temple in the distance. 

“Ready to go?” Obi-Wan called. “I’ve done this three times now, and it’s always easier than the first time. You have nothing to worry about, my dear.”

“To be honest I’m more worried about being defeated by the cold.”

He put the hood of his robe up and shot you a smile. “Well the faster we walk, the faster we will get out of the cold, and the faster you’ll get a new lightsaber.”

He wasn’t wrong. You were cold. And you were determined to find your new crystal. 

You decided to take the lead, heading in the direction of the Temple. You couldn’t really remember much about your last visit to Ilum, it was over twenty years ago, but you were drawn to the Temple, a pillar of warmth in the Force compared to the physical chiliness of the planet. 

Hearing the crunching of Obi-Wan’s footsteps in the snow, you couldn’t help but feel at ease. As he’d mentioned whilst you were hospitalised, you didn’t particularly have an affinity for the cold, but knowing he was by your side allowed the irritation you were feeling towards the cold to disperse slightly. 

After walking for at least an hour, and making minimal conversation with Obi-Wan, the Temple came into sight. It was a clear day, with minimal clouds in the sky, so the Temple looked just as grand as it had done when you were eight. It was one of the only things you could remember that day, alongside finding your first crystal. Those were certainly memories the Force wouldn’t let you forget. 

“Not long to go now. How are you feeling?” the voice behind you called out.

“I’m feeling like I’m ready to get off this planet,” you retorted. 

The man let out a huff, used to your sarcastic comments. He wouldn’t admit it, but it was one of his favourite things about you.

“That’s the spirit.”

*****

Once you were inside the Temple, it didn’t take long to identify the ice covered entrance where you knew you’d have to go to embark on the journey for your crystal. You turned to look at Obi-Wan, who was looking around the Temple. 

“I’ll open the mechanism for you, but you’ll have to go in alone. I’ll be waiting for you out here, alright?” 

Nodding, you stepped towards the entrance to the cave system. Moments later, Obi-Wan opened the mechanism at the top of the chamber you were standing in, letting the sunlight shine through to melt the ice. 

As he watched you walk through the now-clear doorway, Obi-Wan called out.

“Y/N! Good luck in there.”

You turned around and smiled at him, before heading into the dark caves. You didn’t see it, but you could feel his kind blue eyes burning into the back of your head as you walked away, willing you to be safe. 

*****

It didn’t take long for you to learn your way around the caves, the ones which you still had little to no memory of. Using the Force, you were able to navigate your way around, remembering where you’d already checked. You came across many different crystals, but none of them called to you. 

You remembered what Obi-Wan had told you on the flight to Ilum. 

“It took me hours to find all three of my crystals. Sometimes the Force just rewards patience. Don’t worry if it takes longer than you feel it should. Everything will be alright in the end.”

Right. Patience.

You scoffed. 

It’s hard to have patience when it felt like your extremities were about to drop off at any moment. 

Only then, you turned the corner into an unfamiliar part of the cave system. Feeling as if something was calling to you, you decided to investigate. As you progressed further, the feeling got stronger. It felt like…peace. 

As you came towards the end of the cave corridor, the feeling reached its peak. Reaching the end, you observed the substantial cavern in front of you, eyes focusing on a crystal in the centre of the chamber.

Your crystal. 

It was as if the entirety of the Force itself was being projected into the crystal, as you were taken aback by the energy radiating from it.

Closing your slack jaw, you quickly headed towards where it was located. Despite having to manoeuvre yourself around some suspicious looking pillars of ice, you made it to where the crystal was, and took it from the column of ice it was attached to. Instantly, you were rewarded with the feeling of warmth washing over you, and you knew that this was meant to be yours. 

“Right,” you spoke aloud to yourself. “Time to go.”

And with that, you headed back to where Obi-Wan was in the main Temple chamber. You didn’t know it yet, but he was beginning to pace with worry, having seen the water covering the entrance to the caves freeze over, he knew you shouldn’t be taking as long as you did. 

It didn’t take long for you to navigate your way back to the entrance. Taking a page from Obi-Wan’s book, you decided to kick the frozen ice, smashing it open, and revealing the man’s slightly shocked expression.

He stormed towards you. “Thank the Force!” he exclaimed. “I thought you’d gotten lost in there! Did you get it?”

Holding your hand out towards him, you peeled your fingers back to reveal your shiny new kyber crystal.

He smiled widely at you. “Excellent. You should be proud of yourself. Now, how about we go back to the ship and get some warmth into our systems?”

You couldn’t agree more. 

*****

You left the Temple and it felt a little…colder than when you entered. The two of you noticed the small flakes of snow that were beginning to fall on the frozen ground. Looking up, you noticed the sky had clouded over, with dark grey clouds overwhelming the blue that had been there previously. You and Obi-Wan looked at each other, slight apprehension on both your faces. 

“I think perhaps we should speed up our expedition back to the ship. We don’t want to get caught in a particularly dreadful blizzard and freeze to death, do we?”

“I think you’re right. I don’t like the look of those clouds.”

He looked to the sky. “Nor do I.”

Wrapping your robe tightly around you like you’d done earlier, you embarked on the strenuous journey back to your ship. 

Except the sky was darkening, a lack of a golden transition into night scaring you a little. That, combined with the fast, heavy flakes that were beginning to fall, made you question if you’d even make it back to the ship tonight.

“Obi-Wan!” you shouted. You didn’t know if he’d even be able to hear you over the sound of the whistling wind, but it was worth a try. “Obi-Wan, we need to find cover! We won’t make it in this weather!”

He looked back at you, squinting at you to avoid getting snow in his eyes and wiping the lingering ice from his beard, he nodded.

“You’re right! We’ll be frozen by morning! Head to the left, there’s a wall of ice which might be harbouring a cavern!” he yelled. 

This was even worse. You were now practically walking into the blizzard, making you even more cold than you were before. The laying snow was also gaining height, growing from covering your ankles to coming up to your knees, slowing you both down. Plus, the pain from the injuries you’d sustained on Sovath were beginning to make an appearance, making your leg and ribs hurt substantially more than they’d done in the past week, despite the bacta treatment you were still receiving.

After a long struggle against the snow, you made it to the wall of ice and began the search for cover. You walked directly behind Obi-Wan, his large frame giving you a small amount of protection from the snow. You couldn’t help but feel a little bad about this, however. He was getting the brunt of the cold. 

You felt him stop in front of you. “What’s wrong?” you called out. 

“There! An opening! We need to get inside, come on!”

Following him into the cave, you were finally granted some relief from the storm. The two of you took a moment to catch your breath, before Obi-Wan suggested having a look around the cave to see if there were any resources to start a fire.

Which was a complete and utter failure. 

The cave was small, cold, damp, and now closed off. Whilst searching around, a large snow drift rendered the two of you trapped until the blizzard passed. 

Sitting down to wait for it to pass, you saw Obi-Wan ignite his saber from the other side of the cave in an attempt to ward off the darkness for a little while.

“I guess we're stuck here for a while,” you muttered, clearly unhappy with the current situation. You were frozen and all you wanted was to get into your comfortable bed and sleep. But instead, you were embedded in this small cavern whilst your nose was stinging from the cold.

Obi-Wan, who didn’t look happy himself, let out a small sigh from the other side of the cave and pulled the hood of his robe over his head. “I suppose you’re right.”

Then, in an attempt to preserve heat and energy, the two of you were rendered silent. 

As some time passed, you could feel the frost seeping into your bones. You’d truly lost feeling in your fingers, toes, and nose now, and you could feel yourself uncontrollably shivering. You lifted your head to look at Obi-Wan, the blue light from his saber being the only source of illumination within the dark, and saw him with his eyes closed, shivering himself. 

The both of you couldn’t go on like this any longer. 

You decided to speak up.

“Obi-Wan?” you whispered, not wanting to startle him.

He opened his eyes and lifted his head in your direction. “Yes?”

“We need to do something to preserve more heat otherwise we will perish in here.”

His eyes flickered away from you and he hesitated before speaking. “There’s nothing. There’s no wood for a fire, our robes are damp, and all my saber is doing is giving off minimal light.”

You were silenced. 

You noticed his hesitation and wondered if he had thought of the one idea you’d been thinking about for the past hour.

The one which would probably reveal the love you had for the man.

You took a chance.

“What if we…maybe…preserved our body heat…together?”

His eyes snapped to yours, but the darkness of the cave hid the blush rising to his cheeks. 

He certainly had been thinking of that idea.

“I just thought…we’d both be warmer than we currently are and—”

“Yes. It’s worth a try,” he interrupted, sounding reluctant. You tried to hide the upset in your expression. Yes, you’d be close to him, but he didn’t sound best pleased about it. 

You slowly rose to your feet, making your way over to the other side of the cave where the man sat. You then gently lowered yourself to the ground, already feeling the warmth emanating from Obi-Wan’s body. The man was a ray of sunshine, physically and emotionally, and it was hard not to feel heated in his presence.

You cautiously edged closer and closer to him, until your shoulders were touching. You heard him let out a breath, but you weren’t sure what it meant. 

“Is this okay?” you asked him. 

“...Yes,” he mumbled. 

Once again, you could feel the tension he was holding in his shoulders. 

There was something wrong, just like you’d sensed when you left Coruscant’s atmosphere.

Sitting quietly next to one another, you could hear every shallow breath he took, every beat of his pounding heart. 

Jedi were meant to control their fears.

But how could the Jedi next to you do that if that fear was running through every bone, muscle, and tendon in their body?

It was seconds later when you felt an arm drape lightly over your shoulder.

His arm.

And you froze. Not from the cold that you’d now mostly forgotten about in favour of understanding Obi-Wan, but in your own fear. And longing.

You took the opportunity to lay your head on his shoulder, and that was the catalyst. Pulling you into his side, he turned his head to rest in the crook of your neck. You exhaled, feeling like this was exactly where you were meant to be. He curled his arm tighter around you, running his hand up and down your bicep, and you sensed a disturbance in the Force.

You knew why he felt so anxious.

It was because he loved you. 

Not just as a friend, which you previously thought.

He loved you.

But he just never knew how to say it.

This stoic, courageous, determined man had hidden his love for you for perhaps as long as you’d hidden yours for him. 

You felt brave for a moment, and you wanted to show him just how much you loved him too.

“Hey.”

He looked down at you, and he noticed your gaze flitting between his eyes and lips.

His eyebrows furrowed for a moment, like he was confused on whether this was really happening, and that you were in fact hinting to him that you loved him too.

After several moments, his face relaxed and he seemed to get the hint, leaning down to press a hesitant and timid kiss to your lips. The weather had made both of your lips chapped, but in that moment, you wouldn’t have changed anything for the world. 

You didn’t focus on the cave, the cold, the reason for your being there, because all that mattered was him. The feeling of him everywhere, on your mouth, your body, your soul. Because that’s what Obi-Wan did. His entire presence surrounded you until all you could feel was his warmth, his happiness, his love.

You’d felt his presence since the day you met him, only now, it was finally complete.

Not allowing him to pull away, you deepened the kiss, moving your hand to lay at the back of his neck, playing with the fine hairs that lay there. He wrapped his arms around you, keeping you warm and showing his devotion to you simultaneously.

A minute later, you pulled away, breathless but happy. You peppered his face with kisses, leaving them on every inch of available skin on his face, trying to reinforce just how much you’d wanted this. Then, you rested your head on his shoulder, a small smile gracing your face.

A trembling voice came from next to you.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry.”

You looked up from his shoulder, gazing into his eyes. Just like when you’d awoken in the hospital after the events of Sovath, you’d noticed how his eyes were glassy, like a soft look from you would make him cry.

“Whatever for, Obi-Wan?”

“For taking this long to show you any affection. I was…scared…to say the least. I didn’t know how to approach the situation and I didn’t…I didn’t want to lose you.” His voice wobbled as he spoke. 

You took his hand as he carried on speaking. 

“I was so worried after Sovath, I thought I’d lost you. I knew I wouldn’t be able to hide my feelings for much longer, not after Sovath. Not after I nearly watched the woman I care so much for die in my arms. You’re the light of my life, and I don’t think I could ever live without you.”

Your heart melted.

You tried to reassure him, squeezing his hand. “But I’m here. And I’m okay. You won't lose me, Obi-Wan. Just as I hope I’ll never lose you.”

“You won’t lose me darling, I promise. Even if we freeze in this small cave, at least we’ll be together. Every second spent with you is worth it.”

He curled his arms around you, pulling you close to his body. 

Finally, this felt like where you were meant to be all along.

*****

When the morning came, you awoke to feel Obi-Wan’s arms still wrapped protectively around you. He was already awake, running his free hand softly through your hair, the other laid on your back.

“Good morning, love.” He smiled down at you.

“Mmmph—Morning,” you groaned, nestling deeper into the warmth of Obi-Wan’s arms.

“Sleep well?” he teased.

Grumbling again, you tried to settle even deeper into his arms. He chuckled and wondered if you were trying to force your way into his skin. It felt so normal, so natural, that you’d almost forgotten about the confessions from the previous night. In your eyes, you’d always been his. In his eyes, he’d always been yours. You were always destined for each other, it didn’t matter which galaxy, universe, or lifetime you’d existed in. You’d always belong to each other. There was no doubt about it. 

“I thought that you might like to know that the blizzard has ended and the snow blocking the entrance has melted. We can head to the ship whenever you like now, my dear.”

Resituating yourself with your environment, you looked towards the entrance.

He was right.

It was unblocked, the light of the sun shining down through the cave. 

You were free.

But you’d also have to go back to the Temple and hide whatever was now happening between you and the man. You weren’t sure you could take the secrecy of it all. The slight smile on your face contorted into one of sadness. 

Obi-Wan saw your expression shift. Reading the troubled look on your face, he spoke tenderly. “I know. But we can make it work. We will make it work. I promise you that, sweetheart.”

With a newfound confidence, the two of you rose to your feet, gathering any belongings and making sure your new crystal was safe, and left the cave, hands threaded together like they’d never be apart again.

Walking back to your ship, you smiled at one another, knowing all it took for you to share your love was a broken lightsaber, a trip to Ilum, and a rather harsh blizzard.

[firsjournal]

A/N: hello! so this is going to be 2 parts, ill try and get the second part up asap!

warnings: mentions of injury, angst.

Love Lies in a Lightsaber (Part 1)

(word count: 2.6k)

Part 2

The Jedi Temple was buzzing with activity. In the midst of the Clone Wars, it always was. The sounds of Venators in Coruscant’s atmosphere, the humming of lightsabers, the buzzing of holoprojectors with bad signals as Jedi called from Outer Rim planets. It never failed to remind you of war.

Yourself and Obi-Wan were walking to the Temple hangar as you readied yourself for your next mission. Your shoulders were slumped as you walked, rucksack dangling from one shoulder. Obi-Wan, on the other hand, looked completely poised, representing what civilians thought a ‘good and perfect’ Jedi should look like.

“Sometimes I wonder what the Council thinks of me when I get sent on these missions,” you pondered. “Do they think I'm so incompetent that they find it funny to constantly send me on reconnaissance missions?”

“Actually, Y/N, recon happens to be a very important part of war and without it, we’d have no time to prepare for battle,” Obi-Wan replied, a forced neutral tone in his voice. “Without you taking the majority of them, the Republic would stand no chance at winning.”

You were getting irritated. Of course, Jedi weren’t allowed to be irritated. But you and Obi-Wan were both Generals, both of the same ranking and both leaders of your own clone battalions. However he was always sent on the missions you signed up for, leaving you to be assigned those which you thought to be completely and utterly boring. 

Obviously, they weren’t boring. Without them, any attempts by the GAR to progress the war would end in failure. You were just blinded by slightly un-Jedi-like feelings right now. Several un-Jedi-like feelings. You were angry, mostly at the Council, a little bit at Obi-Wan. But you were also…excited? It wasn’t often that you were sent on missions with Obi-Wan in particular, and you always loved being partnered with him. Right now it was the only thing that made the thought of this mission bearable. Still, your feelings of disgruntlement overrode any feelings you might have had towards Obi-Wan, and so your thoughts returned to the mission.

You deserved some involvement in a large battle, you thought. The only full scale battle you’d been involved in was the First Battle of Geonosis, where you’d put so much determination into fighting that even Yoda had complemented your skills.

“Fought gallantly, you did. Impressive skill, you have,” he’d said with a proud expression on his face.

Clearly the thought didn’t carry through to now.

“Well they must think I’m doing a terrible job if I now have a standard recon with you and Anakin,” you said quietly. You knew this was a lie, and you knew that this would hurt Obi-Wan’s feelings. Your role was important, but the anger that had been bubbling under your skin for months now was beginning to emerge. 

He stopped walking and crossed his arms. You felt like you were six years old again, being lectured by a Jedi Master for speaking out of turn.

“Stop this negativity, Y/N. You’re a good fighter, everyone knows this. But this mission could have a defining role in ending the war, and perhaps the battle will start earlier than anticipated. The Council simply wants to make sure all grounds are covered.”

You took a moment to think. You were still annoyed that the Council may have thought you were even the slightest bit incompetent. But you knew Obi-Wan was right. Too much time and money had been put into fighting. You knew the Jedi were tired. Especially Obi-Wan. You saw it in his eyes when he arrived back at the Temple after a mission. Or when you sat with him, Anakin, and Ahsoka for dinner and he simply stared down into his food like even the thought of eating reminded him of sitting in a camp, eating ration bars, not knowing when the fighting would end.

Because nobody knew. And if you could help to end the war with your recon, then that is what you would do.

Just then, you heard footsteps next to you. You turned around to see Anakin, holding his own bag, with a small smile on his face.

“Everything alright?” he asked. 

“Everything is fine,” both you and Obi-Wan spoke simultaneously. 

Anakin raised one of his eyebrows in question, clearly not believing you. 

He shrugged, before nonchalantly stating: “Whatever you say, Masters.”

And so you set off for what the three of you had presumed to be a normal mission.

How wrong you were.

*****

Several hours later, you arrived on Sovath, a small planet but nonetheless aligned with the Separatists. Anakin made sure to land your ship a good distance away from the facility you were assigned to do recon on, knowing there was a possibility that it would be heavily guarded.

The three of you disembarked the ship, taking in your surroundings. Sovath was damp, green, and somewhere that wouldn’t be particularly appealing to the regular civilian. 

You let out a huff. You hated being out in the rain. Why couldn’t you be sent to a warm planet for once? 

Suddenly, Obi-Wan’s voice interrupted your thoughts. “Right. Let us go over the plan one more time.” He reached into his bag and pulled out a holoprojector, pressing a button so a map of the facility appeared.

“We will all avoid the main entrance. It’s where we can assume the most droids will be. Anakin will enter through the chimney in the east wing and conduct his assessment there. Y/N and I will enter through this,” he pointed to a region at the back of the projected building, “entrance where she will proceed to the cellar and I will investigate the north wing. Once we have cleared the building, exit as fast and silently as you can, and we’ll meet back at the ship. Keep your comlinks on at all times in case we find trouble and please try not to be detected. We just want to know what is happening on Sovath before we head into a full-scale battle. Is that clear?”

You nodded at him.

You watched Anakin make the first move, heading towards the facility, before Obi-Wan turned to face you.

“Come on, let's get this over with,” he said in a hushed tone.

You and Obi-Wan walked in a comfortable silence, with him leading. Although he was perfectly quiet, you could feel his uneasiness through his Force signature, and no doubt he could feel the same with yours. You both continued to trudge through the rain and the dense forests of Sovath towards the large facility, truly wishing you were anywhere but there. 

As you eventually neared the building, Obi-Wan slowed his walking and eventually came to a halt, holding his hand up to signal something important.

“We’re close. Are you ready?”

Were you ready? You didn’t know. But you didn’t want to give him a reason to lecture you on your feelings of anxiety when you knew he was suffering with his own, so you just nodded again.

He took a deep breath and his eyes momentarily fluttered shut. 

“I sense Anakin is inside. We should follow his example before we get caught lingering,” he said in a voice which you’d often teased him about, the one you called his ‘meditating voice’.

But there was no time for joking right now.

“You’re right. Let's go.” As Obi-Wan moved towards the back entrance, you felt yourself become distracted as your eyes lingered on him. You knew you should be focused on the mission, but you were worried. Realistically, there was no reason to be, considering to him, this mission was as easy as swinging a lightsaber, but the idea of being without him downright scared you. 

You tried to shake off these thoughts, remembering just how skilled this man was, how dedicated to surviving he was, and pushed forward. 

When you came to the entrance, it was deserted. The pair of you had anticipated this in your plans, but it was strange all the same. 

Obi-Wan opened the door quickly and quietly, holding it open for you to enter. 

“Alright. This is where we split up. Remember you have your-”

“Comlink. I know,” you cut him off.

“Y/N. I’m being serious. This is recon, we don’t want anything to happen to make this dissolve into anything more than recon. But I should add, if you feel that anything is wrong, or if you sense a trap, do not hesitate to contact me. Yes, the mission is important, but so is your life. Am I clear?” 

You stared at him. 

Did Obi-Wan just admit feelings of attachment? What else could he mean by those words? Even if he was just being friendly, he’d openly admitted that he cared about you.

You were brought back to the reality of the situation as Obi-Wan broke up the concerns swirling in your head. 

“Y/N? What’s wrong? Can you sense something?” he queried, placing a tentative hand on your shoulder as you stared into his eyes. 

“Sorry. I’m fine. Just thinking about the mission. I promise I’ll keep in touch.” 

Obi-Wan seemed to outwardly accept his, although it was clear that his thoughts lingered on what had just happened. He turned to move towards the corridor towards the north wing before you softly called his name. He inclined his head towards you.

“Yes?”

“Be safe…please.”

“You don’t have to worry about me, darling.”

And with that, he walked away.

*****

You kept your footsteps light as you headed to the cellar. Before long, you found the stairs to take you down to whatever was hiding down there. Looking at the door to the staircase, you felt a growing restlessness within the Force, which made you worry about the two other men inside the building. 

They’re fine, you told yourself. They’re grown men, Jedi even, they can handle themselves.

Ignoring the conflict in your mind, you took a deep breath, pulled your lightsaber off your utility belt, and crept down the stairs.

Halfway down, you heard Anakin’s voice crackle through your comlink.

Apparently the Force was determined to make you check on them. 

“The east wing is clear. I’m going to search the central hall. Over.”

Obi-Wan’s smooth voice made an appearance. “Good. I’m nearly in the north wing. Y/N, how is it going down there?”

“Everything is fine at the moment,” you replied. “I’m making my way down the stairs now. It’s dark, but currently clear.”

“Excellent. Let us hope it stays that way.” With that, you were met with silence once again.

One that made you very uncomfortable.

Finally reaching the bottom of the stairs, you realised just how large this place was. The entrance to the stairs was fairly close to the entrance you and Obi-Wan had entered from, so you hadn’t had the time to consider the size of the building and its correlation to its importance. 

But this floor?

You felt as though it made the vast halls of the Jedi Temple look small. 

Once again centring your thoughts on the mission, you took the time to recount the plan in your head, sticking to what Obi-Wan had said earlier.

“Okay. Light steps. Clear all the rooms down here. Don’t get caught,” you whispered to yourself. You’d done recon so many times, this time couldn’t be any different. Only you were particularly glad to have Obi-Wan and Anakin checking the rest of the building. The idea of doing it all yourself made you shiver.

The first section of the cellar was the easiest to clear. It was filled with rooms full of boxes, supply cupboards and what appeared to be spare parts.

You stepped into an immensely dark room, with no lights, no windows, and no life forms. 

None you could sense through the Force, anyway. 

So it was a shame you couldn’t sense the hundreds of battle droids also in the room with you. 

You ignited your lightsaber, the blue hue finally showing what was being hidden in this facility.

It was storage, that’s why you couldn’t feel any life forms here with you. Battle droids were concealed, probably for a large-scale invasion of a planet close to Sovath. 

Then:

The lights turned on, and so did the droids. 

Panicking, you tried to comm both Obi-Wan and Anakin. But of course, you were underground. And there was no signal.

The first droids began to identify you in the room with them. 

“Jedi!” one of their robotic voices yelled. “Get them!”

You tried to run as fast as you could towards the stairs, only to trip on something. Your lightsaber extinguished as it flew out your hand, rolling away from you.

There’s nothing on the floor, what could you kriffing trip on? you screamed in your head.

You looked down.

There was no way this day could get worse.

But the thermal detonators that littered the floor and made you fall certainly could. 

You tried to Force-push them away, but it was too late. Everything moved so fast. Too fast.

The detonator which a droid had thrown next to your lightsaber exploded, blasting it into several hundreds of pieces. You watched the blue of your kyber crystal light up before it shattered.

Your saber. Your lightsaber. The one you’d built when you were eight. The one you’d promised your Master that you’d take good care of. In fact, you promised you would never lose or break it. 

Your lightsaber is your life, they’d said. And now it was gone.

Staring at the remains in shock, it took a number of seconds for your brain to process the hundreds of blasters pointing at you. 

This was it. This was how you’d die.

Especially when you felt the first blaster bolt hit your left shin. And when the second one hit your ribs. And when the third one hit— 

Suddenly you were pulled back by a pair of strong arms, being dragged away from the droids. Your mind was scrambled. You couldn’t define what was going on around you. All you could think about was the pain in your body and your broken lightsaber.

What a failure of a Jedi you were.

Oh how you wanted to tell Obi-Wan how wrong he was for his earlier comment. ‘You’re a good fighter, everyone knows this’. A good fighter wouldn’t go into shock at the sight of their lightsaber being destroyed. A good fighter wouldn’t fall over a karking thermal detonator trying to escape from battle droids. 

But you did. And Obi-Wan would never fail to try and change your mind. 

*****

You couldn’t tell how much time had passed. You’d felt yourself be lifted up and held in the same strong arms that dragged you away, giving you some semblance of comfort whilst your head struggled to figure out what had truly just happened. 

“Stay with me, Y/N!” you heard a faraway voice shout. “Anakin, where are you? Please tell me you made it back to the ship?!” the voice cried out with urgency.

“I’m on my way. R2 is locking onto your coordinates now, we’re almost there, I promise.”

Your head became fuzzy, and you were finding it difficult to keep your eyes open. But still, you found the strength to lift your head to look into the eyes of the person carrying you.

You’d recognise those cerulean eyes anywhere.

Obi-Wan. 

“You’re okay! We’re okay! Anakin is almost here and we're going to get you home and safe, alright? I-kriff!-you have to stay awake! Do not leave me sweetheart, I won’t let you leave me!”

You couldn’t hear his words, but you could definitely feel the warmth of his tears on your face.

You felt safe.

So you closed your eyes.

[firsjournal]

Fir I think you might be the queen of obi wan fics. I’m literally addicted to everything you have written - esp the comfort ones!

Could I please request an obi wan x reader fic where she goes off of her bc medication and has a bad endometriosis day... so obi takes care of her and her padawan!

Thank you 🤍

A/N: thank you for your request and thank you for your kind words! they had me smiling so much when i read them at work :) however, i did change it slightly so obi-wan takes care of the reader whilst she has her period as i just don't think i could do your initial request justice, so as someone with a uterus, i felt much more confident just writing about menstruation. plus, i feel there should be a lot more research and understanding of a chronic disease like endo, and therefore i didn't want to get anything wrong. however, i hope you enjoy this anyway!

warnings: menstruation/periods, AFAB/female reader.

Monthly Comfort

(word count: 1.5k)

“So, Master Kenobi, do you have anything to add to your report?” you heard Mace Windu ask.

Although you weren’t really listening.

At the moment, all you could focus on was the pain in your abdomen. 

You were well acquainted with your monthlies, but it never failed to surprise you with how persistently annoying it could be. 

Truly, you were doing anything to avoid thinking about it. That included trying to focus on the report that Obi-Wan was giving from his latest mission with Anakin, looking out the window and observing the Coruscant freighter that was zooming past the Jedi Temple, and you trying not to make eye contact with Yoda as you could feel his eyes on you, sensing your anxieties. 

Force, all you wanted to do at this moment was go back to your quarters, drink tea, and curl up in your bed. 

But you were a Jedi Master, and thus you had responsibilities, so you simply sat quietly, pretending to look interested in the matter at hand.

Listening to Obi-Wan provide his report to the Council, he sounded determined, so steadfast, that you never would have known if his thoughts deviated from the statement he was giving.

Apparently you didn’t know Obi-Wan as well as you thought you did, because his thoughts were entirely occupied by you.

And he just knew that something was wrong.

As the Council meeting ended several hours later, you tentatively rose from your seat and tried to remain as normal as possible as you trudged out of the room. You couldn’t help but pull at a loose thread on your robe, something you often found yourself doing as you tried to redirect your mind. 

Exiting the room, you noticed Obi-Wan stood outside, evidently waiting for you.

“Obi-Wan?” you murmured.

“Come on, come with me,” he responded, placing his hand on the small of your back to lead you with such confidence you daren’t disobey him.

You sighed, knowing the tea and sleep you’d so desperately wanted earlier would have to be postponed.

After a short walk, which consisted of you looking at the floor and him keeping his hand firmly placed on your back, you arrived at what you could only assume were his quarters. 

When the door whooshed open, he allowed you to enter first, before helping you take your robe off. 

“Here, why don’t you sit down and we can discuss what had you looking ever so upset in that meeting.”

You looked down at the ground once again before traipsing over to his bed and sitting on the edge. As he pulled up a small stool to sit in front of you, you couldn’t meet his eyes. You simply couldn’t tell this Jedi Master and General of the Grand Army of the Republic that the reason you weren’t listening to his Council report was because of your period. 

“Y/N,” he pleaded. “You know you can talk to me. I won’t pressure you, but it pains me to see you like this. We are…” he paused. “We are...friends, remember? I’m here for you, just as I know you are for me.”

You found the courage to look into his lovely blue eyes and you only saw his own pain reflecting back at you.

The pain he felt from not knowing why you were acting like this. The pain he felt from thinking you might be in immediate danger. 

“I…” you began. 

He sat there quietly, silently willing you to continue.

You looked down at your hands before taking a deep breath.

“It’s…it’s, uh, it's nothing serious I promise. I’m okay, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I don’t believe you. Clearly something is on your mind and I want to make sure you’re truly okay.”

Then, he reached out to take one of your hands in his own, squeezing it to show his support.

You exhaled.

“Alright. It’s my period.” You felt the heat rise to your cheeks as you felt like you’d revealed your deepest secret to him.

Obi-Wan?

He simply nodded like it was the most normal thing in the world. Because it was. 

He brought the hand he was holding to his lips, placing a tender kiss on the back of your hand.

“I want you to stay here and get comfortable. I’ll be right back, is that alright my dear?”

“That’s fine,” you mumbled.

Then he stood, taking off his own robe and wrapping it around you. Soothed by the smell of him, your posture relaxed and it was the first time you’d fully been able to focus on something other than the pain. 

As he went to leave the room, he turned around to send you a sympathetic smile before he left.

With Obi-Wan gone, you took the time to look around his room. Of course, you were best friends, and you’d been in here many times, but now you were really looking. You saw the several trinkets that he’d gathered from his missions across the galaxy, a spare robe that he always kept on the back of the kitchen chairs. You looked at his bedside table to see the holo-photo you’d given him for his birthday: it showed the two of you, aged twenty one, smiling after Qui-Gon had caught the two of you sitting out in the rain, watching the ships pass by. 

Happier times, you thought. 

After a while, the door whooshed open again, and Obi-Wan stood holding a box. What was in it, you didn’t know, but you tilted your head inquisitively at it.

He cleared his throat before speaking: “I wasn’t sure what you needed, so I asked Padmé for some help and she…gave me this box.”

Your heart melted.

He slowly made his way over to you and placed the box on the bed, before opening it. He began taking out items, like a hot water bottle, boxes of pads and tampons, some of your favourite tea, essential oils that Padmé knew you liked for your bath, and painkillers.

Finally, he revealed one more item to you.

“Padmé didn’t help me with this, but I presumed it may help you feel a little more like yourself.”

You looked at the item in his hand, which was a small box of chocolates, a delicacy in these times.

“Oh Obi-Wan you really didn’t have to,” you spoke quietly, tears welling in your eyes.

He sat down next to you, wrapping his arm around your back and pulling you into his side.

“I know, my dear, but I wanted to. You deserve the world, especially when you’re in pain. Now, how about we make you feel better?”

You nodded. 

“Let's get you comfortable, then.”

And with that, he helped you remove your boots, tabard, and tunic, and gave you back his own robe for you to wear.

Then, he waited outside whilst you cleaned yourself up in the refresher, knowing that his presence alone would soothe you.

When you reentered the main room, he handed you a steaming cup of your favourite tea, the one which you always saved for days like these, and gave you some of the painkillers he’d acquired earlier in the day. As you took them, he brushed a strand of hair behind your ear and kissed your cheek. 

A while later, he led you to his bed where he pulled back the covers for you to get in. You tried to protest, stating that you could quite easily take the sofa, or even go back to your own room, but he merely insisted that you would be more comfortable.

He gently climbed in the bed next to you, handing you the hot water bottle that you hadn’t seen him fill, and let you rest your head on his shoulder. 

“You scared me earlier,” he said quietly. “I mean, I’m still scared. But I hope I managed to make you feel even somewhat better than you did in the Council chambers.”

You turned to kiss his clothed shoulder before replying.

“You did. Thank you, Obi-Wan, for what you did today. Thank you for treating me like a person.”

His face relaxed upon hearing you were now at ease, and the corners of his lips lifted into a smile he reserved only for you.

He watched you close your eyes, and he knew that despite the harsh reality of war, this was the closest he would currently get to peace.

You knew Obi-Wan was good at taking care of people. You’d occasionally been on the receiving end of his care, when an injury had been slightly too severe, or you simply needed some extra comfort after a mission had gone wrong. But seeing him care for you this way, like he was no longer a Jedi or a General in the war, seeing him act as if his entire world revolved around you, you didn’t have any words for the thoughtfulness of his actions. 

You loved this man.

You were Jedi. You couldn’t share your feelings. But the way he looked at you, the way he kissed your temple like you were made of glass, and the way he was now laid next to you, watching over you like you were the centre of the universe, he didn’t have to say the words for you to know he loved you back.

[firsjournal]

A/N: my first non-request fic! it was honestly very self indulgent as someone who suffers from headaches because i would love an obi-wan to comfort me and rub my head. hope you enjoy!

A Way To Ease the Pain

(word count: 1.9k)

Headaches were something that you were quite familiar with. They varied from time to time, sometimes metaphorical, like council meetings or noisy younglings, but usually they insisted on being literal. 

You’d quite honestly tried everything to get rid of them, with your latest attempt being some kind of rare medicinal flower from the deep forests of Kashyyyk. Of course, your headaches prevailed. But alas, Master Che had diagnosed you with chronic headaches. 

Really, there was only one thing that could relieve you of the pounding that took place in your skull on the daily, and that was your sweet boyfriend Obi-Wan. The routine he’d formed was a familiar one at this point: He would kiss your temple, plead with you to go to bed (“Darling, you’d feel a lot better if you just laid down and let me take care of you,”), then he would place a cold cloth at the base of your neck and proceed to rub wherever the pain was centred in your head.

You often felt as if you didn’t deserve him.

So, when you didn’t turn up to your usual meditation session with Anakin and Obi-Wan, they had their suspicions for what was troubling you. 

“Obi-Wan, where is she?” Anakin questioned, scratching his head. His impatience was getting the better of him. “Usually you’re the one to keep track of her whereabouts. Don’t tell me the one time she doesn’t turn up to meditation you have no idea where she is?”

Obi-Wan rubbed his beard. Of course, he was worried. Typically if you couldn’t make it to meditation you’d at least comm them, but right now you were emitting radio silence. 

He also knew you didn’t like to be seen as weak, especially for what he thought the cause of your absence was, so he decided to redirect the conversation in favour of not informing Anakin of the headaches you were affected by. 

“Anakin please, don’t tell me you haven’t noticed how busy the poor woman has been recently. She was telling me yesterday that the Council has her preparing for a Padawan. Perhaps she’s just overwhelmed. Or she forgot,” he spoke.

Anakin looked at him, an unphased expression plastered on his face. “She never forgets. She’s always here on time. She wouldn’t just not turn up without telling us. Maybe you should check on her.”

Obi-Wan knew Anakin was right. He knew he should check on you. He knew something was wrong. But showing his care for you would reveal his attachment, ultimately revealing your relationship. 

He sighed. “Yes, you’re right. I’ll search for her.” 

“Master?”

He paused and turned around to face Anakin.

“Make sure she’s safe.”

Obi-Wan nodded, and set off on his mission to find you.

First, he thought it apt to check the Halls of Healing. You could often be found there when you were experiencing a particularly harsh headache and you simply didn’t want to trouble anyone.

Obi-Wan included.

Arriving at the Halls of Healing in record time, Obi-Wan, with his boots clicking against the polished Temple floors, stormed in.. 

The smell of bacta permeated his nose. He hated the smell of bacta. It reminded him of the war, even when he wasn’t fighting. 

He looked around the Hall until he came across Vokara Che, who was wiping down a surface, most likely from a recent casualty.

“Master Che,” he called out. “I just wondered if Y/N was here. I know she…comes here when her head hurts.”

She lifted her head and smiled sadly at him. “No. She hasn’t been here. In fact, she hasn’t even been to collect my latest attempt to cease her pain.”

A pause.

“Is everything alright Master Kenobi?”

He gave a short nod. “Yes, thank you Master. Everything is fine.”

And with that, he exited the Hall.

Obi-Wan Kenobi was a patient man. But when it came to you, the Jedi Code which had taken up so much of his mind ceased to exist. The most important, thought-consuming thing in his life was now you. Which is why he now found himself practically running towards your quarters.

After ten minutes and some curious glances from his fellow Jedi, Obi-Wan arrived at your quarters.

Knowing you appreciated your privacy, and knowing there was a possibility you were in pain in there, he knocked with minimal force on your door.

“Are you alright in there darling?” he spoke quietly.

Silence.

He decided to knock again, this time with more force in case you didn’t hear him.

“Y/N? Are you in there? Is everything okay?”

Silence.

He knew if you were in there you wouldn’t want to burden him, despite him knowing just how much you loved his comfort. But he also knew that if you were in there, all you really wanted was for Obi-Wan to hold you and kiss you until you couldn’t focus on the pain in your skull anymore.

Which is why he took the executive decision to input the code to your quarters, the one which he had memorised for the nights he wanted to sleep by your side, and entered your quarters.

It was pitch black inside. Usually you’d have the curtains drawn to let as much sun in as possible.

The darkness scared him.

After a few moments his eyes adjusted, and what he saw broke his heart.

You were laid on the floor, head pressed to the cold tile, presumably to get some relief. You were fully dressed like you’d been intending to attend meditation with himself and Anakin, but didn’t have the strength to make it out of the door. A thin blanket covered your body, and you shivered ever so slightly every time you took a breath.

“Oh…oh my darling,” Obi-Wan whispered. He ran his hand across his face and took a deep breath, assessing the situation. Slowly, he took several delicate footsteps towards you, making sure he didn’t frighten or alarm you.

You lifted your head from the floor and croaked out his name. “...Obi?”

“Shh, I’m here my love, I’m here. You’re alright now.”

He kneeled down next to you, placing the back of his hand on your forehead.

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry I didn’t tell you-”

“You have nothing to apologise for my love, now let me help you,” he spoke as leaned forward to press a kiss to your forehead.

As you shifted to rise to your feet, he placed a hand in the middle of your back to help you up. You let out a small sigh and rested your body against his in an attempt to gather some strength. He took your hand and gently kissed it, sending you a small smile to let you know you were doing well.

As you let out a soft grunt of pain, Obi-Wan decided to hook his right arm under your legs, letting his left hand rest on your back, before gradually lifting you up. You curled into him, nuzzling your head into the crook of his neck and letting out a deep and exasperated sigh.

He could tell you were in more pain than you were letting on.

But you were stubborn. And you’d never tell him.

Which is exactly why Obi-Wan began his usual course of action.

With all the love and devotion in the world, he carried you to bed, where he knew you wouldn’t sleep instantly, but with his presence, you’d rest a little easier knowing you weren’t alone.

After placing you gently into bed, wrapping you up with every blanket he could find, he marched to the refresher to retrieve a cold cloth to drape on your neck.

When he returned with the ice cold towel, you winced at the contact when it touched your neck.

“Shh I know darling, I know,” he cooed to you. “You’re so brave. You’re doing excellently.”

“...It hurts…”

“I know it does, but I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.”

He placed small kisses on your nose, your cheeks, your forehead, and finally your mouth.

“Where does it hurt?” he questioned.

You slowly pointed to your forehead and left eyebrow, eyes still closed.

“Okay, I’m going to start rubbing your head, is that alright my love?”

You were too tired, too in pain to answer, so you nodded once.

But when his fingertips touched your head with such tenderness, you were once again reminded of why you fell in love with this man.

This man. Your Obi-Wan. A man whose faithfulness to the Jedi Order never faltered until his friendship and succeeding romance with you blossomed. Where his loyalty to controlling his emotions held strong until he couldn’t control his neverending worship of you.

Although you couldn’t physically express your utter love for your Obi-Wan at this moment, the way you opened your eyes to look solely into his ocean blue ones told him all he needed to know.

When you promptly closed your eyes again, Obi-Wan knew that despite your exhaustion, it wouldn’t be an easy night. You often woke in pain despite his efforts to ease the pulsation in your skull.

But he would remain by your side until the morning. And until the end of time. 

*****

When you awoke in the morning feeling particularly groggy from the events of the previous day, you carefully turned your head to look at your beloved and your heart melted at the scene next to you.

Obi-Wan, your outwardly stoic (to anybody except you of course) lover was laid fast asleep on his back, letting out the occasional small snores. Small strands of hairs covered his eyes, a far cry from his usually neat appearance. You noticed he was only dressed in his soft brown undertunic and trousers, which made him look impossibly lovely.

Force you loved this man.

You raised your hand to his face and delicately moved the stray hairs away from his eyes. The small contact made him shift, turning over to face you in bed.

You couldn’t help yourself when this caring, gorgeous, and exceptionally lovely man was laid in your bed, so you leaned over and pressed a light kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Like you, like most Jedi, Obi-Wan was a light sleeper. So it was no surprise when he woke up from the simple feeling of your kiss.

He let out a yawn and rubbed his eyes when he saw you looking at him. “Oh, good morning my love.” Another yawn. “How are you feeling now?”

You intertwined your fingers with his before answering him. “Much better, thank you Obi. Your hands always work magic.”

“Oh really?” he teased.

You gave him a playful smack with your free hand. “Cheeky man.”

He simply laughed, that deep rumbling laugh that never failed to give you butterflies, and placed his hand on your waist, pulling you closer to him.

“What are the plans for today? No rest for the wicked I suppose?”

“Well, I think we may have to attend meditation with Anakin considering you were indisposed yesterday. Or, we could simply pretend you are still out of sorts and spend the day together?” he said, grinning at you.

You smiled up at him. “I think I prefer the latter.”

Yes, he was the best pain relief when your head hurt, but he was also the sunshine that pushed away your clouds, the spring that followed your winter, and the love that followed your heartbreak.

And you simply could not ask for anybody else.

[firsjournal]

i've recently been sooooo obsessed with writing a series of oneshots of obi-wan x temple guard!reader (like how they met, how the relationship works, different scenarios etc), what do we think??

obi-wan x temple guard!reader?

definitely!

ew no

Voting ended onNov 16, 2025

[firsjournal]

Hello there! Fellow writer here who shied away from doing this because I have far too many WIPs already lol. Can we get some disaster trio fluff?

A/N: thank you for your request! i really enjoyed writing this one because i love found family and i hope you like it too!!

Time for Tea

(word count: 1.5k)

It was 8PM and you were making your way to Obi-Wan’s quarters for one of your favourite activities of the week. 

Tea time. 

A tradition that started when you and Obi-Wan had been Padawans together, you liked to use your shared liking of tea to relax and perhaps engage in the Temple gossip you were outwardly dismissive of. 

Whilst this tradition had started out as a time for you to simply spend time with a friend, over the years it had gradually developed into something more. Shared smiles turned into brushes of hands on the teapot, which turned into warm hugs on a particularly rough day, which developed into what it was today: romance.

You still drank tea, you couldn’t abandon both yours and Obi-Wan’s favourite beverage in favour of other activities, but there was significantly more handholding and many more gentle kisses, which you couldn’t get enough of.

That was until Anakin became Obi-Wan’s Padawan. 

Anakin was rather jealous of the time you spent with Obi-Wan. 

As a nine year old, he found it hard to believe that his master wanted to spend time with someone other than him, and needless to say, he wanted in on the party. 

Naturally, he was unaware of the blossoming relationship taking place between the two of you and you wanted to keep it that way. But, you knew he was having a hard time adjusting to Temple life, so you thought it right to invite him along. Plus, he’d told Obi-Wan he liked your presence, and it was good for him to bond with people other than his master. 

One day, when he was ten, he ran to your quarters and knocked on the door. When you opened it, you found him practically buzzing with excitement for your tea party.

“Master Y/N!” he exclaimed. “Master Obi-Wan and I went off-planet for the first time today!”

“Is that so?” you replied. “Where did you go?”

You didn’t expect him to respond with the name of your home planet.

“Why did he take you there? Was it on a mission?”

Anakin paused, his face holding a shy expression.

“Anakin?” you questioned.

“Well…Master Obi-Wan said it was a secret…but he wanted to surprise you with your favourite tea…”

Your eyes became glassy with tears, and Anakin looked at you curiously. He, of course, thought the two of you were just close friends, with Obi-Wan simply getting you the tea as a gesture of kindness.

Which wasn’t wrong.

But you’d often confided in Obi-Wan about how you missed the smells of your home planet, the one memory you carried with you throughout your time as a Jedi. 

The smell of tea.

The tea, your tea, it was as much a connection to your planet as it was to your boyfriend.

You shared your memories and he shared his. You made new memories. New connections. New allegiances. 

And now those memories would be introduced to the newest member of your small family. 

You couldn’t be happier. 

*****

Ten years passed. The war raged on. And you still found time for tea. 

It wasn’t weekly, like usual, but it was something you looked forward to. Just you, Obi-Wan, and Anakin. 

But when Anakin was assigned his very own Padawan, you all questioned whether she too should be introduced to your gathering like Anakin was all those years ago.

It had taken years for you to share all your secrets with Anakin. He was sixteen when you told him about your relationship. He was nineteen when you told him that you and Obi-Wan eventually had plans to marry.

And now the possibility that you had to share all those secrets with a new person scared you a little. 

One day, you thought it right to discuss the situation with Obi-Wan.

“Sweetness?” you called from the small seating area in your quarters. 

“Yes darling?” he replied from the kitchen where he was making you both breakfast.

You paused before asking: “What is Ahsoka like? I…I’ve only met her briefly and I don’t know much about her.”

He thought for a moment before stepping into the room and leaning against the doorway. “Well, she’s headstrong like Anakin. She has a lot of determination. But she’s also exceptionally kind. I think you’d like her. She reminds me of you.”

You gazed at the wall behind Obi-Wan, thoughts running through your mind.

Then: “Do you think she likes tea?”

He smiled at you before making his way over to the sofa you were sitting on. Sitting down, he leaned towards you and kissed your forehead.

“Why don’t we ask her?”

*****

Two weeks later, you sat in Obi-Wan’s quarters waiting for the arrival of Anakin and Ahsoka. You were somewhat nervous, having always been shy around new people, especially those with dominant personalities, but part of you was excited to meet the person who reminded Obi-Wan of yourself.

Obi-Wan was brewing your favourite blend of tea when the door chimed.

“Come in!” he shouted.

The door suddenly whooshed open and you were greeted by the sight of your dear friend Anakin, and his young Togruta Padawan.

You slowly rose to your feet before smiling nervously at Ahsoka.

“Ahsoka, you remember Y/N.” Anakin prompted, sensing the slight anxiety emanating from you.

“Oh! Of course! It’s good to see you again Master Y/L/N!” Ahsoka blurted out. “Master Skywalker told me you meet every week to…drink tea?”

You nodded. “Yes, we do. It’s a good way to unwind. Especially in these times.”

Ahsoka’s wide smile faltered a little. The war was never a popular topic of conversation.

Sensing the change in mood through the Force, Obi-Wan made an appearance. “Ah! Anakin, Ahsoka, welcome. Please have a seat. Tea?”

As Obi-Wan poured four cups of tea, you felt his Force signature reach out to comfort you. Even though you weren’t yet comfortable enough to openly share your relationship with Ahsoka yet, Obi-Wan’s Force nudge was like one of the warm hugs he woke you up with every morning, or the kiss on the tip of your nose he gave you when he knew you were sad. It was reassuring. Understanding. Compassionate.

It was part of the reason why you loved him so much.

It worked, because suddenly you felt the confidence to ask her about her home planet, her training, how she was finding Anakin as a master, and she was particularly excited when you asked to see her lightsabers.

Obi-Wan was right. She did remind you of yourself.

So when the conversation died down a little, and you watched Ahsoka speaking quietly to Anakin, you felt Obi-Wan place his warm hand on the small of your back, and you smiled, knowing that the young Togruta would be a welcome member of the small family yourself, Anakin, and Obi-Wan had formed over the years.

*****

A few years down the line, and collectively, you and Obi-Wan decided it was the right time to tell Ahsoka of your relationship with him. 

So, when she bounced into the room with Anakin next to her and saw the troubled expression on your face, she instantly questioned it.

“Y/N? Are you alright? What happened? How can I help?”

With shaking hands, you gave her a cup of your favourite tea in the chipped blue mug only she favoured and gestured for her to sit down.

When she watched Obi-Wan sit down next to you and intertwine your hands to ease your nervousness, her jaw dropped. She looked at you, then Obi-Wan, and then Anakin, who simply smirked at her, and back to you again.

“WHAT–? SINCE WHEN?” she yelled.

You leaned your head against Obi-Wan’s shoulder and laughed at her reaction. 

He kissed the top of your head before answering.

“We’ve been friends since we were crèche-mates together. I suppose over the years it just…developed into something more. It hasn’t been easy…we’ve both had our fair share of doubts regarding attachments but…” he trailed off.

You finished his sentence for him. “But it just felt right.”

He squeezed your hand.

Ahsoka looked at Anakin. “You knew about this?”

“Yup. Don’t worry Snips, it took them years to tell me too. But I promised to keep their secret, just like you have to promise to do as well.”

Ahsoka nodded her head vigorously, placing her mug down on a small side table before walking towards you. When she paused in front of you, you were surprised to see her open her arms.

You slowly stood up and reciprocated the gesture, pulling her into a warm hug.

“Thank you, Ahsoka,” you whispered. “It means the world to us.”

She didn’t speak, only hugged you tighter.

What you didn’t see was Obi-Wan and Anakin sharing a fond expression, one which could only be understood by two people who had grown used to hiding something as personal as love.

Although the darkness of the war would continue, it was like the morning sun had risen on your relationship.

You couldn’t help but find it funny how the reason you’d found your family was simply down to tea.

But you wouldn’t have had it any other way.

[firsjournal]

Hi there!! So exciting that you’re starting to write after being a reader!!

If you’re still interested in obi wan requests could I please request fluff with him and an anxious reader who’s studying for her exams? Maybe she’s like a uni Jedi??

🤍🤍🤍

A/N: thank you so much for your request!! i was so excited to write this, and i know its quite angsty (oops) but i hope i did it justice, especially with this being my first fic!

Trials and Tribulations

(word count: 1.2k)

The Jedi Temple was always quiet at night. Younglings slept, Padawans studied, and Knights meditated. It was the epitome of peace and usually, you loved the quiet. You loved hearing the whispers of wind around the corners. You loved hearing the pages of thousand-year-old Jedi tomes being turned by Padawans whose endless curiosity could never be fulfilled. 

But right now?

The silence was taunting you.

You were hiding in the most secluded corner of the Archives, surrounded by closed books and uncharged datapads, for you yourself were a Padawan.

Right now, all the silence did was make way for thoughts to enter your mind. Thoughts focused on one thing: your upcoming Trials. 

The thoughts flooded your head like a sandstorm on Tatooine. They were aggressive, unpleasant, and currently, they were making it exceptionally hard to focus.

You enjoyed everything about being a Jedi, but you were tired. Tired of worrying. Tired of the anxiety that you felt so regularly.

As you sat cross-legged in the darkness, you rested your head in your hands. You were finding it hard to do anything other than think about the Trials. Of course, there were other Padawans who were experiencing the same thing as you. Force, every Jedi in the Temple had gone through the Trials, so what is the issue?

You began picking at your fingers, a habit that you couldn’t break, especially when you were this anxious. 

What if I fail, you thought. What if I fail and they send me to the Service Corps. My master will be devastated. 

But it wasn’t your master’s disappointment that you were most concerned about.

It was Obi-Wan’s. Your best friend. Qui-Gon’s Padawan. The person who had helped you through some of your worst thoughts. Also, someone who was often regarded by your master as being the ‘perfect Padawan’. 

And someone who you had happened to have developed feelings for. 

As you thought about Obi-Wan, you felt wetness on your cheeks. One tear. Then another. And then even more. Until you found yourself quietly sobbing, your tears dripping onto a holobook on the history of Soresu.

Ironic. 

You forcefully wiped your tears away, but each one that fell was like a reminder of your worry.

Drip.

I’m not good enough.

Drip.

Even if I pass, they’ll still be disappointed in me.

Drip.

The whole Temple will see me as a failu-

“Y/N?” a familiar voice spoke quietly, interrupting your thoughts. His voice always reminded you of honey. It was smooth, that much was true. But the sweetness of it was really what you loved. Upon hearing it, any negative thoughts you ever had dissipated. And it was like it was created by the Force itself. It would wrap around you like the morning sun, and slowly melt the anxieties within your head. It could bring you warmth and comfort, even in the hardest times.

And right now, all you wanted was his comfort.

Hearing his voice, you slowly raised your head, trying to wipe away any remaining tears on your face. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” he questioned, using a soft tone of voice in an attempt to avoid spooking you. 

You let out a small sniffle before shaking your head.

You saw the slight crease appear between his brow, and he moved closer to you.

Slowly, ever so slowly, he sat down next to you, with his legs pulled up to his chest. Before even saying anything, he carefully guided your head to his shoulder, where you let it rest.

You sat in silence for a while, with the feeling of his hand running softly through your hair keeping you grounded. 

Then.

Quietly.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

You took a deep breath and lifted your gaze to meet his, and the vast blueness of his eyes made you as calm as the oceans they reminded you of. 

“I’m scared, Obi-Wan.”

“...What’s scaring you?”

“Failure,” you whispered. 

He nodded.

“The Trials?”

You didn’t reply. You couldn’t. You just cried. 

Obi-Wan didn’t hesitate to pull you into his arms, and he wrapped his strong arms around your shaking body.

In any other situation, you’d be delighted to have the arms of the man you secretly loved around you. But right now, all you could do was cry.

After several minutes, your cries quietened down and your breathing returned to normal. What didn’t change was Obi-Wan’s presence, however. You could hear the words he was whispering to you clearly now, and they made your just-broken heart full again.

“You’re so strong. So brave. I’m so proud of you. I’ll always be here for you.” He repeated his affirmations over and over again, until all you could focus on were the words he was murmuring and the feeling of his body pressed against yours. 

He looked down at you, a soft expression on his face, before speaking:

“Better?”

“Better.”

A moment passed. 

“...You know, I overheard Master Windu talking to your master. They were talking about you. About how you’re one of the strongest meditators in the Temple. About how composed you keep yourself when you train. About how you always show compassion. They’re proud of you too, you know. Even though that head of yours makes you think otherwise. They’re proud. And so am I. I always will be.”

You exhaled deeply, and it was as if the weight of the galaxy had been lifted off your shoulders. Hearing those words, they’re proud, and so am I, they made you feel like you could pass the Trials. Like you will become a Jedi. You could finally breathe easier knowing that someone – him – believed in you. 

With a newfound confidence that only he could provide you with, you wiped your face yet again, and lifted your head so that your gaze met his.

“Obi-Wan?”

“Yes?”

“...I love you.”

“I know.”

Then, he took your face in his hands and looked over your tear-stained face before landing on your eyes.

He gently and gradually leaned forward until his face was mere inches from yours and pressed his lips to your cheeks, nose, forehead, and chin, before turning his attention to your lips.

“Would it be okay if I showed you just how proud of you I am?”

You nodded.

And he kissed you. It wasn’t rushed. It wasn't hard. Just simple, like he was letting you get used to the feeling. Simple and loving. 

After a moment, he pulled away and rested his forehead against yours, and you both couldn’t help but smile. 

“Now, if you’re still feeling uncertain, we could always study together. Both our Trials are coming up and I think we would both appreciate each other’s help. And company.”

You smiled, a real, true, honest smile.

“I’d like that. But only if you don’t show off your knowledge of the history of Soresu to me.”

He laughed. A sound that matched the feeling of warmth that only his presence could provide.

“You know I can’t make any promises.”

And with that, you felt the first tendrils of true happiness, something you hadn’t felt in months, poking through into your life.

Only it came in the form of a fellow Padawan who gave you promises of help and love, clearing the path of dark clouds that had previously lingered over your head.

You couldn’t wish for anything else. 

You were happy.

[firsjournal]

hi everyone!

as a long-time fanfiction reader, i've finally decided to dabble in writing and am hoping to start writing some obi wan x readers !! i have a couple of ideas but im open to taking requests (im open to fluff and angst but don't feel comfortable writing smut so won't be writing it for the time being). im super excited to start writing about obi wan as he has lowkey been my obsession for a while now and im literally in love with him so felt like this was the right time to start writing about something im interested in !!

anyway i cant wait to get started !! <3

(ps, im new to posting on tumblr so pls bear with me !!)