My Twin Soul On The Other Side

Hadassah (Huh-daw-suh) Monique (Muh-neek) I Am Erik Medhus’ twin flame/soul & idc if you like it. | ♊ 🌞 ♋️🌙 ⬆️ ♈️| Late Diag. Autistic | Musician | Kitchen Witch | Stoner | Gamer | ESFP | Artistic

[flameontheotherside]

My Twin Soul On The Other Side

Table Of Contents

This blog is sharing my experiences with having a twin soul on the other side. All I want to do is help those in some way who may be dealing with the same things.

As I continue this journey my thoughts and feelings as well as what I learn over the years will change, but our story will always remain the same. While you read my blog please take what you read with a grain of salt. I'm NOT a spiritual expert (neither are you) and if I do come off that way, please know it's really not intended. I hope you develop your own conclusions but most of all, please don't push your spiritual beliefs on me. It's not appreciated as I would never go out of my way to do that to you. If it comes off that I sound like a know-it-all, again, it's not intentional and not what I'm about. Everyone's journey will be different because we are all different. Please be open minded and if you can't, you're welcome to move on.

Special note: I am very well aware of how I sound ("crazy") or whatever. This is totally fine because I once was a skeptic (my how the tables turn) and very ignorant myself so I don't expect people to understand or believe me. However I do not tolerate rudeness or unsolicited advice especially from someone who doesn't know me as a friend. Please understand that this is my blog and my personal experiences.

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Our Theme Song...

Here is a list of probably helpful links on some topics that makes it easy to navigate the blog should there be any topic you care to read up on.

Didn’t think I’d have to say this:

The highest form of ignorance is to reject something you know NOTHING about.

Preface - Kind of an additional disclaimer (updated 2020).

Introduction - The backstory.

About me - basic info about myself. Proof I'm related to Ramesses III (grandfather) My life as a new mom.

Late diagnosed Autistic - What it means to me.

A medium describes my relationship with Erik - She's the only one to specifically say the words. Information about her is there.

A Marriage Between Love & Logic

Star-crossed - The truth about twin soul separation.

Pendulum Work - Recommended way to communicate with your TF not alive safely. I recommend this kit and book.

How you can ensure you'll be together

Confidence in my journey - Why I don't care if Erik is my TF (or not).

Avoiding Arrogance - Don't be a know-it-all because we all don't.

Have a TF on the other side? - Words of advice from a veteran.

Living in your TF's Memory - Suggestions on how you can help the planet raise it's vibrations with love.

Fear, the basis of misery - Misery loves company. Dont let your fear and fears of others fuck you up when your TF isn't here.

Found out your TF may not be? - Having a dead TF is difficult, made more difficult when you find or feel you may be wrong.

Escaping confirmation bias - When having a TF not on this plane.

Guardians Of The Four Realms (aka “Home”) - 

A lot of detail about our “Home” and what I’ve learned and still learning about it.

Galactic Guardians aka Incarnated Gods

Chariot Of The Gods

God

Saints

Starseeds

Vanessa aka “A”

Spiritual Work - 

Stuff we have worked on together resulted in growth and understanding. This is the bulk of our stuff and other things I’ve learned.

Archangels

Archangel Michael

Archangel Raphael

Ascension

Reincarnation

Past Life aka Parallel-Self

Spirit Spouse

Channeling Erik <<< All about my TF

Birthday Letter - The actual handwritten letter HERE.

Lessons - Valuable things I've learned during the course of this journey, --Work in progress as I have to dig through old posts.

Years -

Important details, events or situations happening in that time.

2007

2008

2009

2010

2012

Misc. -

Just stuff of not as much importance and shit.

My life - Shit about me; pictures and performances/SoundCloud

Pregnancy - First time ever pregnant; a journey over the 9 months.

My son, Ricky - Ups and downs of first time parenting. My son is my world.

Me and Rick - Shinnanagins me and my partner do or get into. The towns most annoying couple.

Food porn - I am a graduated chef from Le Cordon Bleu. Sometimes I post my food and recipes. Since graduation, my love for cooking has diminished and have not worked professionally in a long long time.

RIP - Late friends who I was really close with and miss dearly. Posts dedicated to Matt , Alex , Steve, and Odin (my cat).

Fandoms - shit I like or am a fan of.

Bass playing - Covers and practices.

Vlogging / Videos - Video logs

Gamer Tags - Because I game about 80% of my life.

Questions/Answers - People have asked, and I answered.

Twin Flame Movies - Movies I've seen that generally have the twin flame vibe. Very few exist.

Memes

Artwork - Mostly flowers because that’s all I’ve been drawing since I was a kid but they are pretty like the ones decorated on this blog.

Hilarious

Cat-turd-day (caturday) - Pictures of my cat(s).

Astral Home - A duplicate build of the place I go to when I talk to Erik and my guides in The Sims 4.

Our Playlist - YouTube Playlist (public)

Dreams - A collection of dreams leading up to this spiritual journey where Erik was mostly present.

Conversations - A few logs of channelings here and there with Erik, god, angels and guides.

Haters - A collection of obvious trolls, and bad actors. I don't put up with bullies and I enjoy calling them out.

My Intuitive Blog and Reviews / Feedback - I am a Tarot Reader and Channeler.

- Hadassah Monique

(◕‿◕)♡

[flameontheotherside]

waking from a dream without you next to me feels like a well deserved punishment

[flameontheotherside]

Thought I’d never love anyone ever again but I did. I thought I’d never love anyone as much as Erik but I did. I did only to be hurt again because I’m too broken to be loved.

This is cruel.

[flameontheotherside]

The world is coming down on me

And I can’t find a reason to be loved

“Arms” Christina Perri

[flameontheotherside]

[flameontheotherside]

Happy 9th Anniversary To Us!!!

I can’t fucking believe it’s been this long!!! This journey has been an absolute RIDE. But we’ve grown and there is still so much to do.

Was called in to host karaoke last night so we didn’t properly “celebrate”. Do what, idk. Usually we watch my favorite twin flame movie (In Your Eyes 10/10 recommend). Which actually maybe we will watch today before I go in to work!

Since working and going out to karaoke I’ve made a lot of friends and gained notoriety for my metal performances. Last night I sang Laid To Rest by Lamb of God for the first time. I did OK but I’d like to do better! Still people loved it. I’m so thankful for the opportunities I’ve been given to make friends and form relationships with people in the karaoke world over here. People are friendlier here in Longview than Tacoma. Then again this is a much smaller town.

I got a little emotional at the end of my shift over Erik. Everyone was so supportive and nice about it.

[flameontheotherside]

[flameontheotherside]

Conversations #43

Erik: I’ve made my bed. Now I’m lying in it. *sad about being dead*

Me: Well then I’ll lay it with you!

Erik: Oh how I love you Hadassah.

[flameontheotherside]

Introspection

Erik and I are still working on stuff. Nothing major. Just working on my development.

I need to get back on track as far as my approach to discussing my journey with others. Just one in particular because she’s the only one I truly talk to. Others not even remotely as much. She made me realize that I was slipping up. Going into this journey, my goal was to help others going through the same thing as me but I guess over time I’ve let my self slip into becoming the very thing I told myself I wouldn’t do which was become a know-it-all. Not wanting to be that guy, I decided to regroup and re-evaluate how I am approaching this topic with others.

Me being the kind of person people ignored, disliked, or dismissed, it was humbling to realize where I was heading and I hold myself to sometimes impossible standards without much room for error. So it HURT like hell to be told I was behaving in a way myself wouldn’t tolerate from others. I cried for days, talked to Erik, consulted my cards. It’s time to remember what I’m actually here to do!

But also there is a lesson on EGO here. It’s not healthy to have a stick up your ass as it is unhealthy to approach people arrogantly. I think what needs to happen is to remember we are all human meaning we are imperfect as perfect as I try to be in everything I do it seems to have the opposite effect. Like a self fulfilling prophecy. There comes a time where we have to let go of trying to be perfect and holding ourselves to a standard without room for error.

It fucking sucks to realize that I’m an asshole but I can take a break, regroup and go back to the way I want to be instead of going being a dick with a giant rod up my asshole. Still sucks and I need time to forgive myself too. All this shit made it impossible to hear Erik again as every time I get down about myself like I am now…my abilities rely on me believing in myself and without that everything falls apart. Without believing in what is possible for you, you can’t move on. That I know for a fact. Nothing works out as long as you keep holding yourself back so I’m going to try today. Being stuck in a negative feedback loop or being neurotic gets no one anywhere regardless of the situation. Ugh 😩 Well…

😘💕 Peace

[flameontheotherside]

Wait…

They don’t love you

Like I love you

-Maps, Yeah yeah yeahs

[flameontheotherside]

[flameontheotherside]

Bruh I’m depressed not insecure 😂 My ego’s intact. My will to live?

Questionable.

[flameontheotherside]

[flameontheotherside]

I’m having a very bad year so far. It turns out no matter how bad you want something there’s a chance it will be taken away before it’s even been conceptualized. For me it happens so very much. Today I would rather not be alive. At least I have Erik and Mary 🚬 🍃 💨

I feel so very fucked. The only way to get ahead on this fucking planet is to fuck over good innocent people and be a selfish opportunist. Because I can’t do that being autistic an easily manipulated and so gullible I lose every fucking time and never ever fucking learn.

Get me off of here I’m fucking done I hate it here fucking please put me out of my fucking misery. The people here are DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck VAMPIRE (Smashing Pumpkins)

The world is a DICK ready to fuck!

[flameontheotherside]

November Rain

I love that song…

Anyway Matt and I got split again. It’s nearly impossible to stay together but I’m kind of pissed at him anyway. 🙄 My intuition hinted he wasn’t being completely honest with me. Turns out he really wasn’t so when I saw the texts between him and his ex I wasn’t surprised. I know he’s sorry I saw it. 😑 Makes sense of course if a friend doesn’t want you to see their phone. Chances are higher that there is something on it he don’t want you to see like porn or texts with someone he supposedly stopped talking to weeks ago.

I told Matthew that if he needs a break that it’s fine. I don’t care. There’s a huge reason I’ve kind of backed off. 😑 I know he’s not over his ex and he’s looking for closure he’s never going to get from her. She’s a real piece of work. She treated him like shit and didn’t talk to him. I know because we hung out as friends a lot. All he did was complain about her. 😒 So well when she found out about me, she did a full 180°.

I’m used to getting my heart broken.

Being completely honest, I told Matthew that if he needs some time to get over this… Girl, it’s cool. We can go back to being friends. No big deal. But he insisted that he wants more than that. Well then I told him I don’t feel comfortable being his girlfriend if he’s going to continue to text her. Matthew insisted over and over that he doesn’t need time. But now after the shit I saw I feel I’m being lied to and I hate liars. If he wants me to believe him, he better come up with a real explanation and honesty about what’s going on.

Going back to Florida 🤔 is an option but I honestly want to see this through. My guides and God keep telling me to work with him. Like at least help him. Be a friend to him because he’s not almost no one. 😅 If we end up working through things like adults that’s great but judging from the past year and how everything has gone to shit, I’m believing more that I’m not good enough for him. 🤦‍♀️ Oh well…

It was a rough month.

I tried to look through some old stuff with Erik to remember what happened. 😔 A psychic told me there was nothing I could do to stop my boyfriend from “leaving” and he was sorry for my loss. I knew I was psychic back then. However still borderline skeptical. My oracle and tarot card collection wasn’t as big but I still used them on occasion. After the phone conversation with the radio psychic I crawled in my closet that spring and cried my eyes out.

It was a long distance relationship with Josh. We’re still friends and we talk. 🤦‍♀️ Only I left the relationship and it was sort of mutual. He was nowhere near suicidal because he was expecting a kid by a girl he cheated on me with living with us. I was crying in bed one day after moving back home when a flower on my windowsill flew clear across my room toward my door! I put it together… 😞 The man who died was my Twinflame and from the time I noticed that flower to the present, it was Erik trying to get my attention. From then on there would be handfuls of supernatural stuff happening around me and in my dreams. I knew for a long time what it was.

As long as I’m honest…

I hate my life. Everything about it seems like a joke to me. Everything from Erik, my past, being homeless to Matthew. I feel like one day I’m going to find I was dead the whole time and this is my “eternal punishment”. 😅 I definitely feel dead inside.

🙃 Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been seeking help for everything and I’m in a program specifically for crazy homeless people. I’m just sick of the stigma too. 🤣👌 I don’t have any problems besides the mental bullshit I go through everyday. But it seems people pass judgment just because I’m homeless. It’s bullshit.

😘❤️ Good night ya’ll!

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(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧Don’t forget to take a look at Erik’s blog run by his amazing mom Dr Elisa Medhus. Lots of stuff about his afterlife and 💩 at channelingerik.com.

(◕‿◕)♡ Social: Twitter Tumblr Instagram YouTube Facebook

[flameontheotherside]

I was just reminded of this part of my life.

Matt passed away in 2021. Idk if he was still homeless but I’m willing to bet it was a drug overdose. You can’t help everyone. I’m also getting old too. At a point in my life more friends are dying every year. Seriously every year it’s like one or two people! Ugh 😩. Anyway I tried my best and he seemed fine but I know the deal.

Being homeless was the best thing that happened to me. I learned so much from that year. It’s funny because it was literally a whole year! My ex depressed me so much I DID try to kill myself but got scared and got to the hospital. My ex took it upon himself to take all his stuff and move back with his parents as a junkie. Found out he was back to using.

Since 2020 I’ve been in Washington state and I absolutely love it! Way better than Florida or Texas. I think the only thing good about Texas is HEB (grocery store). Had a pretty bad experience overall. Complete with a 67year old women who beat me up over a misunderstanding. She looks at my tik tok profile ever so often. Weird. Don’t move in with people you meet at psych hospitals. I was homeless so I did what I had to do when there was nothing left.

I forgotten a lot of very difficult situations. But I still feel grateful for having gone through what I did.

It took five years but I’m back living in a HOUSE in the suburbs. I hated Tacoma. What a dirty place…

😘💕I’m going to smoke and go to bed.

[flameontheotherside]

Manifesting Money

I got random readings by email this week confirming two other readings done by myself and my bestie @clamcastle .

The cards say the same thing as what the psychic said. Now keep in mind I spoke to her once YEEEEARS AGO. I guess she’s reached out to me in hopes my windfall reaches her. I don’t need to pay for a reading technically and definitely not now!

I didn’t pay any attention to what is written about the cards in the email. I used my book to look into each card using the success, blessings, spiritual advice, finances topics to have an accurate read. And it was spot on with a lot of what’s going on now.

A couple weeks ago I started a gig and it’s pretty lucrative but it pays in bitcoin. So I’ve been doing to research and looking into creating a nest egg.

Erik and I have been working tirelessly on manifesting. He said the sweetest thing; he just wants to take care of me and Ricky so helping me meditate on my needs having been met. It was hard at first so I’m shocked that this is really happening.

I’ll know more about my situation Monday. Holy shit the most money I ever had at one time was 11k! Thank god I’m on SSDI so the extra income won’t have me flagged.

For years Erik had been saying “your future is bright” but I didn’t and couldn’t believe him. I was facing homelessness and desperation. For the last two months my guides have also said it as well in so many ways. I’ve been advised by them on what to do with the money and I’m going to my bank to start saving up.

[thephilosopherstone11]

Dolores Cannon’s work often suggests that the ultimate goal of the "Twin Flame" experience is not necessarily a romantic lifelong partnership, but the internal union you described. Once that is achieved, you are free to pursue other connections.

The Purpose of the Twin Flame

According to Cannon, a Twin Flame is essentially a mirror of your own soul energy. The primary purpose of meeting this person is catalytic growth. They are meant to trigger your deepest wounds, force you to face your "shadow" self, and push you toward self-mastery.

Internal Union as the "Finish Line"

In Cannon’s philosophy, the "Union" people often chase externally is actually an internal process.

The Goal: To find the balance of masculine and feminine energies within yourself and to achieve a state of unconditional self-love.

The Result: Once you have reached this internal union, the "karmic" or "energetic" contract with the Twin Flame is technically fulfilled. You no longer need the mirror to show you what is missing or broken because you have found wholeness within.

Moving on to a Soul Mate

Cannon often noted that Twin Flame relationships can be "high-friction" and exhausting because they are built for growth, not necessarily for comfort.

Soul Mates for Stability: She frequently described soul mates as souls we have traveled with across many lifetimes with whom we have a deep, harmonious bond.

The Shift: After the intense "fire" of the Twin Flame has burned away your ego and led you to internal union, many people find they are actually more compatible with a soul mate for the remainder of their physical life. This allows for a partnership based on peace, shared mission, and companionship rather than constant spiritual "purging."

Summary of Cannon's View

You are never "trapped" by a soul connection. If the Twin Flame has served their purpose in your awakening and you have reached a state of internal wholeness, you have every right to move toward a connection that offers you more peace and stability.

Dolores Cannon’s Core Philosophy: We come to Earth to learn lessons. Once a lesson is learned (in this case, self-union), you are free to move on to the next experience.

Well thank fuck for that!!! At least that means I will have options moving forward ☺️✨✨✨✨✨

[flameontheotherside]

As much as I love her and so many professional spiritual speculators, I have to agree and disagree. First the problem is she speaks with authority on subjects she studies yes because she’s a professional but it doesn’t make them gurus. She’s only speaking from what she has found. The fact this is spiritually based also bear in mind is speculative as we all have ideas, beliefs and journeys that will be different from someone else’s.

People will take these teachers as complete truth tellers when that’s so very much the opposite. They are just professionals speculators because there’s no true scientific evidence of spiritual matters especially twin flames.

This is exactly why I wrote my disclaimer!

[flameontheotherside]