NOTES: Alice informs Ryan that Nora is taking a case hard.
WORD COUNT: 1,785
True to his word, Ryan was at the hospital as quickly as he could be. It wasn’t often that a case weighed so heavily on Nora, but there was something about an abandoned baby that he knew she wasn’t going to be able to shake off. Hell, he couldn’t even shake of the idea and he hadn’t seen the baby.
Before getting to the hospital he stopped by a local breakfast dinner and grabbed a couple of Nora’s favourite wraps, he knew she’d have a harder time saying no if he was eating too.
Once at the hospital, he made his way up to the third floor and one of the nurses he knew pointed him in the right direction. He knocked on the door softly before coming in. “Room service for Dr. Miller.”
If Nora had stopped to think about it, she would have guessed that someone at the hospital had reached out to Ryan. He wouldn’t just magically wake up with the knowledge of her surgery. But there wasn’t any room in her mind at that moment for anything besides the little boy. Her heart ached to think about him. As soon as he’d been brought in, she went into doctor mode. He was hurt and needed her.
But after the night waned on and surgery completed, she had nothing to stop her from feeling it. Feeling this little life that was abandoned like garbage, feel the heartbreak of hearing his cries so desperate for help and relief, feel the sorrow of having to amputate part of his limb.
Her hands were clasped together as she sat on the edge of the bed, head hung as prayers raced around her head, stopped only by the knock and the sound of Ryan’s voice. She didn’t try to sit up straight, opting only to look up from her hands. “Hey,” she said, voice small.
Nora wasn’t someone that often let these things get to her. She was the head of her department and had years of learning how to compartmentalize these kinds of situations, something Ryan was no stranger to in his line of work. But, there always would come a case or a day that hit you hard, for reasons far outside of anyone’s control. Nora was clearly having one of those days.
Ryan placed the bag of food on the table beside his friend and sat down on the bed next to her, placing a hand on her back, rubbing it gently. “Alice gave me the rundown,” he said quietly. “And it sounds to me like you saved his life.”
It shouldn’t have surprised her that it was Alice. The woman had run in as one of the nurses as soon as they’d taken the baby into the examination room. She’d been there through the surgery. Part of her wishes the woman hadn’t reached out to Ryan and the other part was beyond thankful the moment he was sitting beside her, hand on her back.
Her throat tightened as she held back the wave of emotion that hit her. “He was abandoned in an alley. Thrown away in a backpack, scared and hurt.” She stared at her hands that hadn’t yet unclasped. “...Just brand new.” A sniffle has her shaking her head. “If you heard how he was screaming..”
“Hey, hey, hey,” Ryan whispered, winding his arm around her and giving Nora’s shoulder a squeeze. “He’s here and he’s lucky and I doubt he’s screaming anymore.”
Ryan knee better than to say it would all be okay. People in their position couldn’t make promises. What he could do right now was hold her and tell her that she did everything right though.
He knew this feeling all too well. The first time he’d had to pull a kid from a fire after Beth was home had hit him hard, even though the kid had been entirely okay. Ryan knew that no matter what happened with this baby, positive or negative outcome, he’d be with Nora every day now, just like all the extraordinary cases were for her.
Nora was no stranger to hearing someone in pain, especially a child. She’d specialized in pediatrics because while it was hard to hear them in pain, it felt more rewarding getting them out of it. Helping that boy make it through the night was a blessing she’d been given, but it hurt now. Covering her hands over her face, she took a few deep breaths, letting the pressure of his grasp steady her like she hadn’t been able to steady herself.
He was alive, she repeated to herself. He’s here. He’s lucky. He’s not screaming anymore. That was good. They were all good things. She said it again, willing herself to take the win, but it didn’t stop her from turning slightly towards Ryan and collapsing her head against his chest. She just needed to be weak for a minute. Her hand curled into his shirt and she held onto him as she let out what she’d been holding in.
Emotions were something Ryan could handle. From the moment he’d sat down next to Nora he’d been waiting for her to let go and let herself breathe. To let out what she couldn’t with her doctor face on. Ryan was here so she could put Dr. Miller away for a minute and just be Nora. Nora with the bleeding heart and the will to fix everything in her path. Nora, who despite her own lack of children, loved them like no one else he knew. The Nora who could feel everything.
When she let go, Ryan held on. He wrapped his arms around her and smoothed her hair gently. There were no false promises of everything being okay but he assured her she was doing everything right and that everyone around her knew the same thing.
This little guy, so small, so needy. Born early, broken, and without anyone to be there for him. It hurt and she let it hurt. The feeling flowed freely the second the first tear was allowed to fall from her eyes and she didn’t stop it. Ryan had seen her at her low point, just as she’d seen him. There was no pride or shame between them, no need to apologize for being human and hurting. Nora let the tears fall until there were no more and she slowly fell silent, now just resting in his arms and finding that comfort she’d needed.
Nora wasn’t sure how long she remained there, and she knew he wouldn’t rush her, but she still straightened herself up slowly and wiped at her eyes. It wasn’t uncommon for her to have been up as long as she had been so she was sure there was a very attractive mix of puffy tear-stained eyes with bags under them. “I’m a mess,” she said, making fun of herself as she sniffled. Then she looked up at him, meeting eyes that were warm and gentle and kind and.. “Thank you for coming.”
Ryan had nowhere to be so sitting here with his friend was his only priority. The cries began to slow but he didn’t move. This wasn’t a cycle he was unfamiliar with, he knew her well. Just like she was always there when he needed it. When he’d woken up in the hospital all those years ago, Nora’s was the first face he’d seen. Heartbreak and triumphs, that was the unspoken agreement between the two of them.
When she finally sat up she was quick to make a comment about being a mess. Ryan shook his head. “You’re fine,” he assured her, knowing the comment would likely go ignored. “Of course I’m here. I’ll always be here,” he continued, pushing a stray piece of hair behind her ear.
It felt natural at this point to lean on each other. Whatever it was, whatever it would be. Nora couldn't imagine her future any differently, having someone who knew what she needed without her having to say a thing. Her hand slid up to his wrist, just a light touch as he tucked her hair back, cool chills dancing up her spine when his fingertips just barely brushed her neck. Something so simple made such a complete difference.
Leaning in, Nora let out a small, contented sigh as she let her forehead press lightly against his, and closed her eyes. The warmth she felt, the silence of the moment, it filled up that piece of her that had been aching since the previous night. "I know," she whispered. "Me too. Forever."
Ryan didn’t move when Nora came close. There really wasn’t anything else in the world besides them right now. His hand had all but stilled at the nape of her neck and her hand was on his.
Ryan would have repeated forever if there hadn’t been a knock at the door that brought him back to reality. Without thinking, his hand dropped and he leaned back. “If .. that’s important, you should go.”
There was an unrecognizable feeling in his stomach. His right hand instinctively found his left and he twisted the ring that was on his finger. Nerves.
Ryan couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt nerves like that. The last time he’d been close to another person like that. What was happening?
The room stilled and it felt like everything else outside of them, outside of this moment, fell out of existence. Every breath felt like it brought them closer. Her skin felt the warmth against his, electricity thrumming between the two of them and sparking along her flesh. There was a pull of something coming from inside her, like a magnet that eased her closer. Or eased him closer? She couldn't tell.
She felt the tickle of his breath on her lips and she became very aware of how close they were, but she didn't want to pull away. She wanted to dive into it. She wanted to let go and...
The knock yanked Nora out of that moment and she turned towards the sound, letting the person peer their head in and give her the update that she'd asked for. She nodded and thanked them before rising to her feet. "Yeah, I.. I should go.. and check on him."
She walked over to the door, the thought suddenly racing through her head. Had she just tried to kiss Ryan? She'd been leaning in, hadn't she? Nora smiled back at him. "Thank you again, for being here.. for seeing through the 'i'm fine.' I'll call you later." Tapping her hand on the door, Nora then head out of the room, the question of what had almost happened in there lingering in her head.
Oh, that’s a buzzword that I’m trying not to say. I don’t want to risk saying “pre-teen” and tempt it to come faster. I’m not ready for Sophia to grow up. As it is, I swear she was just in my arms, waking me up at two a.m. to hold her and rock her back to sleep. I’m really glad she’s loved the change. I’ve never been to Seattle before. I hear it’s beautiful but I have a bias to L.A. Your Beth is such a sweet thing. Sophia has been doing well. She’s a little ball of energy and has decided to make it her life goal to climb up the pole at the fire station.
I can’t really escape that word, she’s twelve after all. Next birthday is the big one. You still have a few years though, instead of a few months, cherish it. Let her be little, I’m still hanging on to that very last bit of little. It’s beautiful, that’s not lie. But California has a beauty of it’s own too. She really is, but I have to say, speaking of biases, I’m pretty sure I have one in regards to her. Up the pole, huh? Well if anyone could, I’d put my money on her.
We may or may not have a few flies on our own team but it’s a good shot, boss. Not many people can cause a room full of hot firefighters to bypass the one woman to get a better look at the Captain.
Flies on our team? Why wasn’t I informed about this before transferring?
I can’t say I’m a big fan of having my picture taken either. I’ve perfected the art of hiding behind my extremely adorable little girl. I think the last picture I let anyone take willingly was Dex snapping the shot after I gave birth and Sophia is five now if that tells you anything. Speaking of adorable little girls, how is yours adjusting to the move? How has school been for her?
I used to be ale to hide out behind Beth, but now she’s hit or miss when it comes to photos, the pre-teen is strong in this one. She’s been loving the move though. Beaches are a regular thing, well as regular as I can make them, back in Seattle even in the summer they weren’t as great as they are here. And school has been great. She’s a smart kid and has this charm about her that allows her to fit in anywhere. How’s Sophia?
Ryan… You got transferred to Burbank, California… The amount of attention you’re going to get is insane. We do 3 different calendar shoots, a car wash… Why do you think all the fire fighters in LA are so attractive? It’s like… a damn requirement here.
I am aware where I am, Wilson. I’m also aware those things aren’t normally participated in by the Captain. I’m the overseer, I get a free card to sit on the bench, the rest of that is on you.
Heh, our old captain was like 70. Then again, that was a few years ago… I’m sure the fireflies are going to love you
I think the captain here was pretty old too, hence why young blood at to take up the reins, and luckily I haven’t dealt with too much shit for being brought in from out of state. And I’ve never really paid much attention to the flies.
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