salt,sugar,sex

:)

[flashesofsun-blog]

Yikers

THIS WEEK is catch up week 

I do everything. 

I apply for committee. Some position, whichever really. Get my name heard even if I don't get the role. 

[flashesofsun-blog]

Fuck you god.

Why do you hate me so fucking much? 

[flashesofsun-blog]

shit

Going to post more shit because I'm pissed at the world, and, honestly, myself.

I hate everything that makes me feel so inadequate. I constantly feel like i can't measure up to being that person that  I really want to be, just because I have the worst, most pathetic inadequecies. I have such a fucking pathetic fear of loneliness. Worse, I can't fucking believe in myself enough to just pick up for one night, just for a make out, and just leave it at that. Even worse, I can't get myself to fucking fuck someone. Because I've saved it for so long. Because I saved it from minty. It just has to go to someone fucking special, right? 

Fucking hell. Ridiculous. Abso-fucking-lutely ridiculous. It gets to a point when you know you really won't ever find that person you can actually trust in enough to want to thrust your whole life's savings into, and you know you wont' ever ever find anyone that will make you quite so happy as you'd hope to be with another person.... and it really just is time to give up. But you can't let go. and so you get abusive, angry, sad and painful. And you can't let go. 

I need to let go. I need a break. I need to stop getting angry and mad at just everyone. 

Fuck. 

FUCK

FuCK .

I just spazzed out at everyone in front of everyone. 

[flashesofsun-blog]

I guess it will be a while yet till I quite understand the opposite gender. Or, more specifically, those of the opposite gender that  I am attracted to. 

So it happened again. The whole S situation, only with the guy I so clearly remember comparing to him. I blame myself entirely for letting myself fall for him. 

Furthermore I blame men in general for leaving me hanging constantly. 

I miss being every guy's best friend. I miss being a complete retard, completely unnattractive in my behaviour, and just having a shit load of fun talking shit. 

I tguess the one good thing about tonight was me rebonding with my exbestie. Little by little. But still rebonding. 

I just don't think I can handle having a heart any more. It's constantly being broken by crushes, real potentials nd just men in general. 

I honestly can't deal with this shit any more. I wish I had given my number to the waiter that was mildly hitting on me. 

There was also V who I feel may have been slightly interested in me at some point

I was too drunk by the end of the quiz night to really know. 

I shouldn't drink. I know this.  I know that alcohol kills me as a person and I really only am allowed to drink with the few people I care about enough to be myself around when I am drunk. 

I. need. a. break. 

He made me feel ashamed. Then hit on my best friend. And somehow, I feel dirtier than I feel betrayed. 

Fucking hell emotional wreck, you really need to get ahold of yourself. 

Someday somewhere there will be (fuck there has to be, right?) someone that will actually appreciate you for the mess that you are? 

Being a fucking unappreciable mess just fucking sucks. 

[catladytodolist-blog]

Bury self in beach sand. If arms are not sufficiently long enough, entice cats to pee on you, after which they will dig up sand to cover their urine that should cover your entirety.

(via catladytodolist)

[flashesofsun-blog]

food whore

4 salmon cutlets

1 cup of tea

4 brownies

1 plate of curry with lentils, paneer, potato

3 slices of bread soaked in olive oil

3 celery sticks

1 tomato

1/2 a capsicum

3 cupcakes

Diabetes is defs in the mix for me :( I tried to repent by stuffing myself with veges instead. Did not work. I keep getting intense sugar lows as well. ARGH. 

[flashesofsun-blog]

I wish

I think I have grown down in the last few years. When I was younger, and I managed to rip out an eyelash, I'd know exactly what to wish for: For happiness, be it my family's, my friends' or mine. In the last few years I've found myself focussing more and more on tiny details that seem so important at times... but only lead to me making some of the most ridiculous most self-centred and almost definitely ridonkulous wishes.  

[whatshouldwecallmedschool]

When a professor puts up slides of biochem pathways

I’m just like,

[flashesofsun-blog]

[ragecomics4you]

I want this sign for my job

http://ragecomics4you.tumblr.com

[stratifiedsquamousepitharin-dea]

Father is back from his trip to India, and it is great to have him back. I don’t understand his obsession with taping everything fifty times over to seal stuff properly. It took me half an hour just to take the tapes off one of the packages he had with him because he didn’t want to ruin the...

[flashesofsun-blog]

You're so cute! :) 

[thebluthcompany]

Mitch Hurwitz and several members of the cast appeared onstage together at a Netflix-sponsored event on Tuesday in Las Vegas. Netflix chief Ted Sarandos confirmed that all ten episodes of Arrested’s long-awaited fourth season will premiere together on a single day sometime next year. Hurwitz also confirmed that production is set to begin this summer, but he also dropped a new nugget of information about what form the Arrested revival will take.

Originally, Hurwitz’s plan had been to make the revival like an anthology, with each episode telling a somewhat self-contained story about a specific character. “That is now kind of evolving into becoming more like the old show again.” The reason for the change: Hurwitz sees a chance to tweak the show’s format to take advantage of the fact that the full ten-episode season will debut at once, rather than over two-and-a-half months. “There’s something exciting about trying to break the form again,” he said.

Hurwitz and the cast made no mention onstage of the rumored Arrested Development movie that’s been expected to follow the TV revival. He did, however, say he’d very much be open to a season five or six on Netflix (!!!). “We would love this to be the first first of many visits,” Hurwitz said. 

A few other random notes from Tuesday’s Netflix and Arrested session:

• Bob Loblaw will return. “We will bring him back,” Hurwitz told Vulture when we asked a question from the studio audience. “It’s kind of a one-joke thing. But if you guys don’t mind bringing it back, we’ll give it to you.” 

• Hurwitz mildly embarrassed Shawkat by reminding her that Cera was her first-ever kiss. “I’ve kissed a lot of people since then,” Shawkat jokingly shot back.

[via]

[thebluthcompany]

[flashesofsun-blog]

Being a Virgin in this day and age is something to be proud of, you're like a unicorn.

Shirley, Community

[catasters]

[flashesofsun-blog]

<3 Let Her Go - Passenger From his new album! :) An amazing performer - not only is he cute and gracious, but he actually talks with the audience, not just at them XD 

[whitepaperquotes]

[stratifiedsquamousepitharin-dea]

RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU

[flashesofsun-blog]

:D probably not a colossal risk, but I do feel better now. At least I can't blame myself for being alone XD