This whole funny “ironic” nihilistic humour is getting really tiring, and it’s time we take responsibility for our negative and toxic actions.
I made this nihilistic “life is meaningless” meme blog in around 2016 back when I was in an awful emotional state, and I was on the cusp of suicide on a weekly basis. But you know what I did with myself since then? I took accountability for my actions. I saw my life and I said to myself this is unacceptable — I really wanna improve and change myself. I kept posting here, only for the large follower count but I started to grow more and more tired of this kind of “life is meaningless” garbage. I started to read more and more about self empowerment philosophy, then I read about more optimistic points of view, then I started putting them to action; I gave more and more compliments and opened myself up to love and commitment and happiness. What really changed was in early 2018 when I saw a therapist for the first time, and I really sorted and organized my mind of the mental blockages that were disorganizing my mind and shutting down the filter, polluting it with toxins and nihilistic thoughts. In 2019, I started working out in more committed fashion, and I’ve been really future thinking. Life has been much better, and it’s made me think about things on this blog more… it’s so absolutely toxic to a young impressionable mind and I wanna stop this.
If you’re stuck in the nihilistic phase and you feel like you have no meaning to life do something small everyday to get you out of bed in the morning. Take a shower, brush your teeth, get your hair brushed. If you did that, that’s absolutely fantastic. Next week, do something bigger: make a drawing, learn a chord on the guitar, learn something new about a species of frog it doesn’t matter what, just as long as it’s bigger than the last. Within the following weeks they grow bigger and bigger in importance: you started with those, and maybe next month you’re starting to write more poetry or songs of your own, maybe even making your own meals three times a day. Keep adhering to this day-week-month cycle and you’ll see such huge results from it. If you really wanna stay on top of things, you should make a day-week-month planner that has what you really wanna do. This also helps organize your mind, and keeps your goals in check (bonus: have an additional comments tab that says what you did or why you didn’t fulfill something as an additional learning lesson). That’s what I did starting around early 2018, and it had done so much for me personally.
Chances are most of the people on social media are around their teens to early and mid 20s, and you’re the most vulnerable demographic when it comes to dependence on unhealthy coping mechanisms (like well….social media ironically enough). You absolutely should NOT agree with negative and toxic media when you’re in a phase of your life that’s changing so much, and you’re at your most formative years where you’re beginning your critical thinking stages and your identitify being formed (and no, I don’t mean turn a blind eye to negative media, I mean you look at it as learning points but don’t use it to make yourself more lazy). Yeah, you may feel as if your best years are “lost”, but guess what? You have an entire life ahead of you to change it and make much better memories. You can look at those days and say fuck that, I’m a much better and incredible human being. I was forged from a trial by fire from the amount of mental illnesses and struggle I had before this. I’m a stronger human being than I was before, and nobody can tell me shit about that.
So if you’re reading this right now, hear my personal testimony and get ready for the rest of your life if you’re willing to improve yourself.
Make a plan. Follow it. Feel better about it.
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