AKUSAIMONTH 2015: BERSERK
Day 20: SET C - “Blank Stare”
Did you know? Apparently Nobodies come back into being the way they remember themselves. I think you probably do, after all the teardrops are gone from your cheeks.
So, apparently the truest vision I have of me is bleeding. I’d laugh about the irony, if it didn’t hurt so much. I keep thinking about how fast the wound scarred over last time. No such luck now, I think it’s getting infected … again. Weird, to be back in a human body, only to realize how frail it really is.
But I don’t think I have to tell you that. Still sleeping, no sign of waking up. Only because you saved me. Again.
I know you don’t want to hear this, but … I really wish you didn’t do it. Save me. You should have just left me in the darkness. You made so many friends, and they miss you. And I … just don’t deserve to be here in your place. They’re friendly to me of course, saying any friend of yours is a friend of theirs and saying it doesn’t matter what I …Even Roxas and Xion. I can see her face now, you know.
I … I’m so sorry. And I can’t even get myself to say it. I can’t open my mouth whenever any of them are around.
I’m glad they gave us a place to stay here in the castle. With strangers living where our parents’ houses used to be, I really wouldn’t have any other idea of where to go. But it hurts to be here, in Radiant Garden. I can barely stand to look outside a window. It’s all so full of memories.
I wish I could have at least talked to you, even if just for a little bit. It’s been so long. And even longer since we talked as friends.
I know I’ve said it a hundred times, but I’m so sorry. For everything I did. I don’t know if you can hear me and I don’t know if you’d even want to listen to my side of the story. It’s not an excuse, I know that. I’m not even sure why I told you at all. I … it just hurts so much.
They tried to bully me into joining them for some ice cream again. But I can’t leave you alone. I can’t. This is the only thing I can do for you. Staying by your side, making sure you’re not alone.
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