i am pious when it comes to loving a woman. i want to worship her. i want to carry the weight of her sins. i want the nails driven through my hands, to ensure hers remain innocent. i want to build her an empire of peace. i want to fill her pews and be the sacrifice at her altar.
i want her to feel safe when i am around. i want her to move a little closer on the crowded train. i want her to reach for my hand when we walk past the dark alleys at night. i want to allow myself to become grungy, rough around the edges, and riddled with scars. all a reminder to my devotion towards my faith.
i want to drink the wine of her. i want to hear the hymn of her voice at the end of every day. i want to be baptized in the oceans of her eyes. i want her to know that her soul is my cathedral, and i will learn the every intricacy of its walls.
to love a woman is to love a god, and she may be the only god i believe in.
Real Talk: Ace Didn't Need to Ask For Help, It's On Garp
i always hate when i see comments about how ace was an idiot or ace should have just asked garp for help because, no? like dawg wtf do you mean?
the one thing we have been told repeatedly across the manga and anime is that ace could have lived his entire life being perfect and he still would have ended up on that podium
he could have become a marine, a police officer, a teacher, a chef and all of that would have been reduced to nothing the moment his parentage was discovered
yes, ace became a pirate of his own volition, but sengoku never mentioned his piracy
he never mentioned all the criminal activity ace did as the captain of the spade pirates or even later as the second division leader of the whitebeard pirates
you know what sengoku did bring up though the moment he got on that damn podium? ace's parentage
he mentions nothing that gained ace his bounty to begin with when he gets that den den mushi in his hand. why?
because it doesn't matter that ace is a pirate. what matters is that they are eradicating the last gol d roger's bloodline
bear in mind that they were killing pregnant women and young children who could have even had the slightest possibility of being roger's lover or kin
akainu deadass says that he doesn't care if every other pirate at marineford escapes as long as ace and luffy died and he would ensure their deaths personally. and for what? not their piracy. none of their crimes. not even for ensuring that the truth that certain countries and lands that were actually saved by pirates instead of the marines never got out
but because their fathers were gol d roger and monkey d dragon respectively
solely because of that, he deemed neither of them deserved to live
and as far as garp goes - i love garp as much as the next person but garp has never done anything for ace to trust him enough to ask for help even if he felt he deserved to ask
garp's negligent parenting coupled with the abusive words ace grew up hearing led ace to believe he didn't even deserve to be born. when he even asks garp if his being born was a good thing, garp can't even tell him 'yes'. he just says 'time will tell'. my brother in the blue seas, that is an elementary schooler questioning his right to exist
ace is defeated by blackbeard in episode 325 (chapters 434-441), luffy hears about his execution being set in episode 416 (chapter 522) and then finally ace is killed in episode 483 (chapter 574). that is 158 episodes and 140 chapters total and in that time what ace receives from garp are conversations that boil down to
"you did this to yourself"
"i just wanted you to become a fine marine"
"i don't have sympathy for criminals but i do have sympathy for family"
and garp actively preventing those who wish to save ace from reaching him. yes after akainu strikes ace, garp does react viscerally with instinct to protect his grandson, but that's too little too damn late at that point
garp having his moral dilemmas mean nothing when, however long ace spent in impel down, he isn't trying to help him
garp having his 'wishing things had been different' thoughts mean nothing when garp is preventing people from saving his grandson
there's a reason garp lets dadan beat and berate him when they reunite in windmill village and it's because he knows she's right
over the course of 20 years, garp has consistently chosen work over ace and luffy. as much as i love dadan and co, bandits are not a good choice to have raise your grandkids and then be the surprised pikachu meme when neither of them wish to become marines
garp's inability to see past the system he disdains yet clings onto actively shoots him in the foot
prevents him from seeing that ace is right when he says he never could have become a marine
luffy could have never become a marine. i do hear arguments saying that luffy might have had a fair chance considering garp is biologically his grandfather but i say that's truly up in the air considering how, even with that knowledge, akainu still wants to put luffy on a poster
but that's all to say, asking why ace never asked garp for help is ridiculous
the fuck would ace look like asking the man who has done nothing but
unintentionally fostered ace's resentment towards luffy in their early childhood
told ace it was his own fault he landed where he did
falcon punched marco halfway across marineford
for help?
and that's not even mentioning the fact that up until that point, ace didn't believe he deserved to live. he didn't think he had the right to exist. the only thing that kept him going up until that point was hoping he'd find an answer that justified his being born and his love for luffy and sabo. ace tells luffy in his dying breaths if it weren't for the two of them, he would have gave up on living a long time ago
yes, garp loves ace and luffy
he loves them both dearly but he is also incapable of putting them before work, before his ideals of justice. these two truths can coexist at the same time. garp's stubborn to a fault and his moral dilemma resulted in both inaction and the prevention of ace's escape
so to say that marineford would have gone differently if ace had asked is seriously undermining the character work. because in reality, it's up in the air on whether or not that would have done anything. ace asking garp for help could have gone either way and that's the beauty of the gray area regarding garp's actions during the summit war
and yes, i can get why it's frustrating that ace turned around to fight akainu when he could have just left and got it back in a blood a different time
but aside from ace having a temper about specific topics, we do get an answer as to why he couldn't bring himself to runaway when we finally are able to dive into his past with luffy and sabo:
he doesn't want to run away from any situation because ace is deathly afraid of losing something if running away ends up being the bad call
and in that moment, luffy was behind him
even if akainu hadn't talked down whitebeard, ace would have inevitably turned back around because he wouldn't have been able to shake his fear of losing something or someone he cared about
as long as there is something precious for him to potentially lose, ace will never run
he was doomed from the start
his being the son of gol d roger doomed him from the start
**USE ADBLOCK & POPUP BLOCKER UNLESS YOU CAN HANDLE EXPLICIT ADS**
IwaOi:
Ano Machi ni Sunderu Karera no Koto
Rating: Gen
Adult IwaOi where Iwaizumi is a photographer and Oikawa is a physiotherapist and has to deal with Iwa being away for his job.
Ghost Cleaner Love
Rating: Gen
A 4-koma where IwaOi can barely see ghosts and MatsuHana can see them clearly. Ghosts love Oikawa and Iwaizumiās presence chases them away.
Gunjou no Shashin (Ultramarine Photograph)
Rating: Teen
IwaOi take a trip to the salt flats to elope, reminiscing on their childhood on the way there. Side Story:Ā āShufuku no Namae waā
Higan no kageeĀ (Itās Whole Like the Flash)
Rating: Teen
A story told through snapshots of IwaOiās time in university where they also live with Mattsun and Makki.
Hyakumankai Ai wo Sakebe (The Million Times I Shout for Love)
Rating: Gen
What would you do if the world was going to end tomorrow?
Ichi Byoukan no Rendezvous (One-Second Rendezvous)
Rating: Gen
Significant moments in IwaOiās relationships told through Iwaās eyes.
Kokokara Dokonimo Ikenai (I Wonāt be able to go Anywhere Else)
Rating: Gen
IwaOi at a traditional festival.
Kono Machi ni Sunderu Karera no Koto (The Story of Those Who Live in This Town)
Rating: Mature
Adult IwaOiās domestic life where they also scale a mountain together.
Shisseishou Oikawa Tooru no Hanashi (The Story of Aphonic Oikawa Tooru)
Rating: Gen
Oikawa loses the ability to speak.
Shukufuku no Namae wa (Beginning to End)
Rating: Gen (& A for Angst)
Side Story to āGunjou no Shashin.ā A story of Iwaizumi and Oikawa growing up together and maybe losing each other.
Tanoshii Jigoku wo Irodoru Nara
Rating: Explicit
ABO verse - where Iwa is a beta and Oikawaās an omega. A story where Oikawa falling in love helps overcomes his self hatred of being an omega.
Tonari no Fukanou to KoufukuĀ (The Next Doorās Impossibility and Fortune)
Rating: Gen
An OC moves into the apartment next to IwaOi and is shook when he meets his neighbors.
Uramado Dogfight (Dogfight from a Rear Window)
Rating: Teen
IwaOi dated and broke up during high school. 5 years after University, Oikawa moves into an apartment just to find out that Iwaizumi is the balcony across from him.
MatsuOi:
Erohon
Rating: Explicit
Adult Mattsun and Oikawa have hot sex. Also Mattsun has some facial hair.
Erohon 1.5
Rating: Explicit
Adult Mattsun and Oikawa have hot sex but with more feelings this time.
Battle Deployment Series: Military AU where the HQ teams are mercenaries
The First Battle Deployment
Rating: Gen
A training session between IwaOi vs BokuAka vs KuroDai with a splash of AsaNoya, SugaKen, and KageHina
The Second Battle Deployment
Rating: Gen
Another training session between teams that turns into 1vs1 matches later.
litany in which certain things are crossed out - richard siken // mirages: an unexpurgated diary of anaĆÆs nin, 1939-1947 - anaĆÆs nin // 2x06 - fleabag // love is my religion- ziggy marley // take me to church - hozier // 1950 - king princess // fine line - harry styles // today I'm someone else - chelsea hodson // a letter to fanny brawne, 13 october 1819 - john keats // sacrilege redux - ashe vernon // planet of love - richard siken // song of the fox - margaret atwood // the brothers karamazov - fyodor dostoevsky // sappho // horatio - t. j. klune // red, white, and royal blue - casey mcquinston // the raven king - maggie stiefvater // nox - anne carson // i know what you think of me - tim kreider // figuring - maria popova // journals and miscellaneous notebooks 1838-1842 - ralph waldo emerson // on earth we're briefly gorgeos - ocean vuong // more than friends - faraaz kazi // red doc> - anne carson // 3x10 - wtfock // red, white, and royal blue - casey mcquinston // jenny slate // an oresteia - euripides (trans. anne carson) // wuthering heights - emily brontĆ« // the song of achilles - madeline miller // global cultures: a transnational short fiction reader - elisabeth young-bruehl // red, white, and royal blue - casey mcquinston // a child's definition of love // small wire - anne sexton // the dead poet's society - peter weir // our beutiful life when it's filled with shreiks - christopher citro // stay here - gaho // keith haring diaries - keith haring // latin phrase // hozier // dooms day - bastille // guilty of dust - frank bidart
The preacher may never marry us and my mama may never know you but I can kiss you over a flask of whiskey and dance with you under the stars and if that isnāt marriage Iām not sure what else God is looking for.Ā
What can you do when you can't even pull yourself out of the water?
NOTHING! THAT'S WHY I NEED HELP! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE SWORDS, YOU BASTARD. I can't navigate. I can't cook. I can't lie, either. I'm confident that I can't live without help!
sorry Sanji not only am I late for your birthday but also all you get is pain shdjjd
01 02 03 04
I really wanna draw a happy birthdayboy Sanji all smiley and wobbly ššš but cant sketch anything new rn and cleaning the comic is much easier, no thoughts, head empty
Anyway, ramble time
I don't have much experience with making comics, the żabka AU one being the one I roughed out first, but it was much less complicated. I dont recall making a serious comic effort before that... I now have a newfound admiration for drawing fight scenes, found it extremely hard lmao Generally I keep second guessing myself, always thinking I should have added more panels to make what's happening more clear, not sure if the flow of it is right. Even though I already moved onto cleaning I still keep making changes to the sketched out panels that were supposed to be final lol I also second guess the plot I'd planned, maybe I didn't think this characterization through enough? What if people dislike it?
But! If I keep tweaking and overthinking it I'll end up never posting it and I don't want that. And if I focus on other people's judgement I won't find joy in making art and I don't want that either.
So here's to sharing art! Regardless of mistakes and doubts š
My take on Sir Crocodile's past, including the possibility of the CrocoParent theory
(Because I can't help thinking about it, in the midst of Kuma and Bonney's heart-wrenching flashback...)
Crocodile is one of the few Warlords we still hardly know anything about, but we're bound to know about his past at some point (same for Mihawk with whom he's currently working, as well as Moria who stole like half (?) of the Rocks Pirates' corpses), starting with the panel that launched all the theories, back in Impel Down :
Thanks to Kuma's flashback, we know Ivankov used to be a slave to the Celestial Dragons up until God's Valley. As for what happened at God's Valley, we don't know the full story yet but what we know is that...
...the Rocks Pirates were defeated and disbanded by the alliance between Garp and Roger. Some (?) of them were cloned by MADS (like Stussy for a still unknown reason) and Roger then became the next biggest threat of piracy.
Their leader's name was Xebec and other people have already explained that it possibly is related to Sebek/Sobek, an ancient Egyptian deity represented either in its form or as a human with a crocodile head. And, as we all know thanks to the Alabasta arc, Sir Crocodile is strongly associated with Sobek/Sebek too.
From there, it's not a stretch to imagine that Sir Crocodile is Rocks D. Xebec's child and was also present on God's Valley, which is how Crocodile and Ivankov possibly first "met". Ivankov witnessed Rocks' defeat as well as his child's survival...
...probably thanks to Whitebeard. Because, considering how the government tracked Ace and Luffy because of their dads, it's clear that any child of Xebec would be hunted by the government just as much and, like he did for Ace, Whitebeard probably saved and offered shelter to Xebec's kid for a while.
Whitebeard saving Croc as a child on God's Valley could be the reason why Croc seemingly hated Whitebeard so much : Whitebeard saving him instead of avenging Rocks, his captain, on God's Valley and then later probably defeated Crocodile, when Croc decided to become a pirate and went after the One Piece, could explain the animosity that we saw during Marineford.
Anyway, because of God's Valley, this could be the secret Iva knows about Croc: he's the surviving child of Rocks D. Xebec, thanks to Whitebeard.
Whitebeard choosing to save him rather than his Captain and then later defeating him could also explain why Croc has strong issues when it comes to trusting others :
Another hint that Croc is related to Rocks is Blackbeard. A popular theory/understanding in the fandom is that, while Luffy inherited Roger's Will, Blackbeard inherited Rocks' (leading to the idea that Rocks vs Garp & Roger will be paralleled with Blackbeard vs Luffy & Koby). This is especially interesting, considering that Blackbeard replaced Croc as a Warlord after he was defeated and sent to Impel Down, which is when they met :
Crocodile also has a lot of "mannerisms" hinting he's a D. He's strongly interested in the Void Century, poneglyphs and the ancient weapons.
Additionally, upon learning during Marineford about Ace's and Luffy's being hunted by the Government because of their fathers, he intervened to protect them...
These acts, outside of the CrocoParent theory (see below), can be explained by Croc's own experience of being hunted because of who his father was, but also by what Ivankov said to Law, who's also a D :
To conclude, I'm a strong advocate that Sir Crocodile is actually Rocks D. Crocodile and he obviously couldn't keep his father's name, in order to avoid being hunted during his entire life by the Government.
But what about the CrocoParent theory?
Well, as much as I'm an immense and dedicated fan of this theory (full explanation here), a part of me doesn't trust Oda to be brave enough to go down that road, even if I'm also eagerly waiting for him to. :D
Whether Croc was afab or amab though, the theory that he's Rocks' kid still applies. The only difference is that, if Croc was afab, then on top of knowing about who his father was, Iva also helped Croc with transitioning, thanks to their devil fruit.
Of course, it's probably through meeting Iva that Croc then came to meet some members of the Revolutionary Army, like Dragon. He gave birth to Luffy, transitioned afterwards with Iva's help and his actions at Marineford (protecting both Ace and Luffy) are not only because he used to be hunted as Rocks' kid, but also because he just learnt that Luffy is Dragon's son and thus his own child. :))
After all, to quote Dragon in the latest chapter of Kuma's flashback...
... "a child is their parents' weak spot" seems to ring to the same bell as Croc's "if you want to protect something, do it right" (like giving up on raising Luffy and leaving him in a remote village of East Blue, to avoid him being hunted by the World Government).
Anyway, long post, sorry about it! I hope we'll know soon about Croc's past. Let me know if I missed some hints ! :D
More fanart! This time it's for Dezace's fanfiction Retired Doesn't Mean Weak. It's a fanfiction where Roger doesn't die and raises Ace as well as Luffy and Sabo with Rouge. It is a wonderfully written AU and I highly suggest reading it!
Rouge and Roger reunited
Roger holding Ace for the first time
Poor Silvers Rayleigh would get inundated with calls from Roger about Ace. He'd get used to it and being an uncle but the poor man
After Roger more or less adopted Luffy he was visited by a familiar Marine.
After Ace joined the Whitebeard crew. Rouge is happy for her son. Roger not so much, because Whitebeard STOLE his son
Marineford, Roger joins the fray to save his son. Doesn't stop him from digging into Whitebeard for his loss of hair
Ace sees his dad and Roger at the execution stand. Like Roger would not go and help his son
End of Marineford. Sabo is a little shit and the base may or may not be dust after this
I am absolutely fascinated by whatever the hell is going on between Shanks and Buggy. Are they best friends? Are they mortal enemies? Estranged brothers? Divorced lovers?
I honestly don't know because I don't think they know. The fact the two of them have wildly different ideas of what their relationship is does not help. It also doesn't help that the more we learn about them, the more everything we know about them shifts.
When we're first introduced to them, it's separately and with the definite impression that Shanks is the good guy and Buggy is a bad guy who hates Shanks due to a 'betrayal'. Then we're shown the 'betrayal' is something simple and stupid and is as much, if not more so, Buggy's fault than Shanks.
Then we find out Buggy lied about what the betrayal actually was followed soon after by the revelation that Shanks ADORES Buggy. In fact, he's so friendly with Buggy that it literally changes how the rest of the world interacts with Buggy. All because one of the Pirate Emperors is treating this pathetic, wet mop of a clown as a beloved equal.
Add in the fact that, by the current point of the story, we are well aware that 'good' and 'evil' are very much relative and... well. For all Buggy's still a villain, we've seen Buggy pull off more relatively 'good' things than we've seen Shanks do. In fact, some of Shanks' more recent actions are extremely questionable. Honestly, the further into the story we get, the more people like the clown and the more people start wondering what the hell, exactly, is Shanks up to?
And then we finally discover what the 'betrayal' actually is. And, wow, does it hurt. Because it's "I love you enough to give up everything for you, including my dreams" only to have the rug pulled out from under you. It's cutting yourself down until you don't know who you even are anymore in order to fit in the box you feel you have to fit in for the relationship to work at all. It's being so codependent you can't imagine not doing everything you can, including hurting yourself, to make sure it works. It's jealousy and anger at being forced to do that and not being able to express it because it's aimed at someone you love and you know the truth would devastate them. And it's leaving because staying would be worse.
It's also "I love you! I need you! Please stay!" and not understanding why love isn't enough. It's loving someone enough to let them go and waiting for them to come back (please come back). It's saying, "I love you," to someone and getting, "I wish I didn't," in reply. It's knowing something is wrong but not what so you can never fix it, no matter how hard you try. It's loving someone so much it's hurting them and not knowing that until they suddenly hurt you back.
It's devastating. And so much of it could be solved with communication.
**USE ADBLOCK & POPUP BLOCKER UNLESS YOU CAN HANDLE EXPLICIT ADS**
IwaOi:
Ano Machi ni Sunderu Karera no Koto
Rating: Gen
Adult IwaOi where Iwaizumi is a photographer and Oikawa is a physiotherapist and has to deal with Iwa being away for his job.
Ghost Cleaner Love
Rating: Gen
A 4-koma where IwaOi can barely see ghosts and MatsuHana can see them clearly. Ghosts love Oikawa and Iwaizumiās presence chases them away.
Gunjou no Shashin (Ultramarine Photograph)
Rating: Teen
IwaOi take a trip to the salt flats to elope, reminiscing on their childhood on the way there. Side Story:Ā āShufuku no Namae waā
Higan no kageeĀ (Itās Whole Like the Flash)
Rating: Teen
A story told through snapshots of IwaOiās time in university where they also live with Mattsun and Makki.
Hyakumankai Ai wo Sakebe (The Million Times I Shout for Love)
Rating: Gen
What would you do if the world was going to end tomorrow?
Ichi Byoukan no Rendezvous (One-Second Rendezvous)
Rating: Gen
Significant moments in IwaOiās relationships told through Iwaās eyes.
Kokokara Dokonimo Ikenai (I Wonāt be able to go Anywhere Else)
Rating: Gen
IwaOi at a traditional festival.
Kono Machi ni Sunderu Karera no Koto (The Story of Those Who Live in This Town)
Rating: Mature
Adult IwaOiās domestic life where they also scale a mountain together.
Shisseishou Oikawa Tooru no Hanashi (The Story of Aphonic Oikawa Tooru)
Rating: Gen
Oikawa loses the ability to speak.
Shukufuku no Namae wa (Beginning to End)
Rating: Gen (& A for Angst)
Side Story to āGunjou no Shashin.ā A story of Iwaizumi and Oikawa growing up together and maybe losing each other.
Tanoshii Jigoku wo Irodoru Nara
Rating: Explicit
ABO verse - where Iwa is a beta and Oikawaās an omega. A story where Oikawa falling in love helps overcomes his self hatred of being an omega.
Tonari no Fukanou to KoufukuĀ (The Next Doorās Impossibility and Fortune)
Rating: Gen
An OC moves into the apartment next to IwaOi and is shook when he meets his neighbors.
Uramado Dogfight (Dogfight from a Rear Window)
Rating: Teen
IwaOi dated and broke up during high school. 5 years after University, Oikawa moves into an apartment just to find out that Iwaizumi is the balcony across from him.
MatsuOi:
Erohon
Rating: Explicit
Adult Mattsun and Oikawa have hot sex. Also Mattsun has some facial hair.
Erohon 1.5
Rating: Explicit
Adult Mattsun and Oikawa have hot sex but with more feelings this time.
Battle Deployment Series: Military AU where the HQ teams are mercenaries
The First Battle Deployment
Rating: Gen
A training session between IwaOi vs BokuAka vs KuroDai with a splash of AsaNoya, SugaKen, and KageHina
The Second Battle Deployment
Rating: Gen
Another training session between teams that turns into 1vs1 matches later.
