some kind of madness

[kkrabbit-deactivated20130730]

[honey-i-dont-care]

[icandolotsofthingsmaster-deacti]

This is always a re-blog. - DB and i

[lenabobena91]

I said I’m fat not ugly. Get your ears checked.

me every time someone responds with, “oh stop it you’re beautiful.” (via sliceofbri)

[killerlizardsfromouterspace]

[emerfiair]

[daddys-baby-heart-deactivated20]

🐾

[fun-sized-princess]

The Fetlife Meatlist: a Blog by some Asshole with too much Time on his Hands. If you are woman under 30 with fetlife profile, your name is or will be on this list. Please reblog this if you are a kink blog.

Edit: the blog has been removed, for more info a link has been posted in it’s place.

[nudityandnerdery]

So, Fetlife. It has some security problems, and apparently some guy decided to demonstrate this by circumventing it, getting a list of women under 30 on the site, and posting it to his website. To demonstrate their security flaw, apparently. Fetlife, for their part, issued a DMCA takedown notice, and he took the list down. Then Fetlife didn’t follow it up, which apparently meant their takedown notice was meaningless. And he put the list back up. Which kind of puts a lie to the idea that it was about demonstrating Fetlife’s security flaws and just makes him an asshole. His blog is down now, but, still, asshole. But it also points out that Fetlife has flawed security, knows it has flawed security, and doesn’t really do much to protect their member’s information. So… I’ve recommended Fetlife before to people looking to learn about kink and get into the community, but I’ve pulled back on it lately, and this certainly doesn’t help their cause at all. So if you’re on Fetlife, you probably want to check up on your info there. If you’re not and are considering joining, you probably want to carefully consider if you want to be.

[kagome-mizuno]

Okay, here’s where i drop some knowledge on you. Fetlife is sure as shit not secure, they’ve known it for YEARS. This is not even the first time someone has done something similar. The problem is, while the first person who did it (maymay, the same guy who FINALLY got them to use SSL) showed he could copy things like user pages without ever having to log into the site, and created a search addon that allowed you to search anything BUT women (which people complained about because they wanted to search women only), he knew how big a target women were. He literally only did it to point out the security flaws. The Meatlist bullshit, though? That’s the guy literally wanting to put up a list of available women to other guys.

Same guy also created the Fetlife Alleged Abuser Database Engine (FAADE), which was made in order to let people warn others about possible abusers (something i installed immediately when i found out about it). You could only see user reports if you had the script plugged in, reporting was anonymous, and there was only a single database, which reports could not be removed from. Know what happened there? The “Circle The Wagons” effect, where people were like “but i like that guy/that one could never be an abuser!” and did a whole bunch of false reports, purposely to make it so the tool had ‘no power’ to it.

Never mind that the kink community itself is fucked right now in general. We have things like the ‘missing stair’ effect where people assume everyone knows about someone with issues. We have things like Jay Wiseman writing about how he was shocked to find out how many women have been sexually abused by guys who should know better, with years of kink experience. We have the Shibaricon incident, where a guy banned by the board for being unsafe was then put in charge of the most classes ever the next year because he was friends with the con’s owner (half the board resigned in protest). We have the NCSF take the assimilation tract, trying to say “we’re just like you guys, only we’re kinky!” while trying to shut people up about the RAMPANT abuse that occurs.

Fetlife has issues, yes. But they also reflect the issues with kink right now. We have tons of instances where consent is violated, people are shunned or kicked out for speaking up, abuse survivors are shut up, there is rampant cronyism and the whole idea of a safeword has become a talisman. On the topic of abuse alone, Fetlife has constantly moved the goalposts: right now, they claim “police report or it didn’t happen”….except, when someone DID put up their police report, and it got up on the Kinky and Popular, FL worked to take it down. When someone was being stalked by 2 other FL members, their personal info being given out by said members (with screencapped proof), the higher ups shut up the one being stalked and did nothing to the stalkers.

This is all nothing new, either! It’s been a pattern of consistency that has been going on for well over a decade now, it is just coming out due to the fact that people are far more connected via the internet. Kink congregation sites have been, well, Cesspools for a long time now. Collarme was a cesspool, had an ownership issue, became collarspace to avoid paying the right person, and is still a cesspool. FL reflects the current kink issues. Bondage.com shut down. Alt still has way too much functionality behind a paywall. None of this is new, this is just the newest face of it (just like Gamergate is the newest face of conservative white males).

https://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2012/03/23/theres-a-war-on-part-1-troubles-been-brewing/

http://maybemaimed.com/2011/03/20/fetlife-considered-harmful/

http://jaywiseman.com/SEX_BDSM_LyingPricks.php

http://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2012/06/missing-stair.html

http://disruptingdinnerparties.com//?s=got+consent&search=Go

http://fetlifefail.tumblr.com/post/44165249827/why-im-leaving-fetlife-and-you-should-too

http://sinshine.tumblr.com/tagged/fetlife

http://www.graydancer.com/shibaricon-concerns/

http://www.notjustbitchy.com/safewords-theyre-just-words/

(more to be added as i find and remember)

[nudityandnerdery]

Just some added info on FetLife and the kink community in general. Please, everybody, be careful out there.

[pissdik-deactivated20160605]

[fun-sized-princess]

The Fetlife Meatlist: a Blog by some Asshole with too much Time on his Hands. If you are woman under 30 with fetlife profile, your name is or will be on this list. Please reblog this if you are a kink blog.

Edit: the blog has been removed, for more info a link has been posted in it's place.

[brilliantlybeloved]

[heatherrooney]

[omgabigailgrace-deactivated2016]

💁🏼💁🏼

[laduree-et-cigarettes]

My soul is baby pink and very expensive

[lovedlittleprincess]

He makes me so wet when I’m bent over his knee and he spanks my ass til it’s pink.

[anothersh0tatlife-deactivated20]

Glass toys are so pretty :3

[missnaughtymcgee]

I have the flower, LOVE! I want all the others!!

[fun-sized-princess]

I have the one on the right. Love it!

[lunar-butch-deactivated20160510]

"ask me about my demons"

lilith: what was your biggest rebellion against authority? why did you do it? raum: do you have a tendency to hoard anything? if so, what? jezebel: talk about a time you used your sexuality to get your way. mephistopheles: have you ever helped  a loved one destroy themselves? verrier: do you find yourself disobeying or obeying most authority? asmodeus: on whom do you want revenge and how would you take it? baal: if you were a god, how would you prefer to be worshiped? lamia: how do you feel about children? lucifer: what are you most proud of? sonneillon: do you hate anyone? batibat: talk about the worst nightmare you have ever had. abaddon: what person, place, or thing have you most wanted to destroy? belias: do you gossip? abraxas: do you believe in any higher power? if so, what? ornias: talk about a time where you felt drained of energy lix tetrax: if you could travel by wind, where would you go? astaroth: have you ever falsely accused someone? carreau: do you consider yourself compassionate or harsh to others? why? leviathan: what do you believe lies in the unexplored areas of the ocean? belphigor: if you could pick 3 forms to shapeshift into, what would they be? azazel: talk about a time when you were falsely blamed for something. mammon: when were you most greedy? for what? verrith: are you a patient or impatient person? pythius: out of all the lies you have ever told, which is your favorite? berith: do you often argue with others?

[fun-sized-princess]

Its been ages since I went into little space and I'm feeling super duper itty bitty tonight. Wish I had snuggles. :-(

[pinkkittenbows]